Author's Note: This is set in the interim between when Surge visited Dani in X-Men: Divided We Stand #2 and her capture in Young X-Men with references to the former (and foreshadowing the latter). It also references her time in Avengers: The Initiative and exit in New X-Men v2 #20.
Disclaimer: Characters mentioned are used without permission and are trademarks of Marvel Characters, Inc. I do not own them and am simply borrowing for my purposes. Please don't sue.
Boys in three pieces dream of grandstanding and bravado,
The city sleeps in a cell notwithstanding what we all know,
Hang on a rope or bated breath whichever you prefer
-- "You're Crashing, But You're No Wave" Fall Out Boy
She hates to leave her cabin these days. It's not just the safety and warmth she's built there, though those things are comforting. It's the people. Whenever she goes out, she can feel them—their stares and judgments. All it takes is one lingering look and she starts to question herself.
She hates questioning herself. She never has before, and she doesn't like that she's started now. But she feels like a fake—a pretender. She can walk the world as if she is one of them but she isn't. Even though she doesn't have powers now, she did. Before.
She hates that her life isn't any simpler because of it, though. She's lost enough that it feels like it ought to be. (Of course, to be fair, a lot of things ought to be different than they are.) Still, she shouldn't have to be constantly looking over her shoulder.
She hates that even after she's left the life behind—a life that wouldn't let her stay—she can still feel it following her. If it's not the government, it's her ex-students seeking her out. If it's not some old villain with a score he's still trying to settle, it's something else.
She hates that there's always something. Because it means she'll never have a normal life, no matter how without powers she is. There was a time she would've chosen to have it that way but now… now she's older and she'd at least like the option of a choice.
She hates a lot of things in her life these days. She doesn't just accept things as they are, though. She's not some complacent sheep, and she may be cynical, but she's not stupid. She'll keep fighting until she wins her way… or some other sort of end rolls around.