Author: Everything_Once
Pairing: Katie/Effy, Naomie/Emily and some others ...
Rating: T for the moment
Warnings: Swearing and some Book spoilers
Summary: How to grow up, when you're not really sure that it's what you want ...
Disclamer: Skins isn't my property, even if I secretly wish so! At the moment I pretty much own nothing ...
LiveJournal: .com/
Twitter: /everything_onceAttention : Sorry for my english, I'm french so I'm totally responsible for every mistake ! Help me ... And please review cause I'm totally new at writting and it scares the shit out of me to be really crappy at it !Please review ! ! ! I wanna know what you think about it
I've try to make it a bit longer ... Hope it's ok ???!!!
Chapter Four
***Effy's thoughts***
I'm already awake for almost an hour now. The day starts to appear slowly. I haven't slept much, I mean between the pain and my mind that torments me. Katie is still lying in bed with me. Actually I'm even in his arms now. That have made me feel good for a while, but it was brief.
My mind starts tormenting me again … If only I could stop thinking … Breathing is becoming more and more difficult … I'm cramped … I gotta go !
Yes! That's it! I have to go … leave those arms … leave this bed … leave this room … leave this house … this city …
There is nothing left here for me … Well maybe except … No!
I watch Katie, she's so calm … so beautiful.
I have to go!
I've try to deny it for long now. This more or less has started this summer when Katie came to visit me in Italy. I'll never have imagined such a thing. How could she forgive me after what I've done? I can't …
I've to admit it, I feel something for her. Something strong … That's why I have to leave.
I've always believed that love was the problem. But no, now I know … My love is the problem.
Every time I'm in love with someone, I only break his life… I'm the problem … It must stop!
I have to go!
I can't do that to her … not after all she has already endured cause of me!
This is why I slowly get up. I'm careful not to wake her. Then I lean toward her, gently, almost without touching her, and I kiss her on the lips.
Before leaving I left a blank note on the kitchen table with just "Katie" written on it. There are so many things I want to say, but I have no strength. Then I leave.
The hardest part is yet to come, I gotta go get a few things at home. I hope she will let me in.
***Katie's thoughts***
I don't need to open my eyes to know she's no longer by my side. She's gone, I can feel it. I open my eyes and I quickly checked around the room. She's gone.
I feel a kind of emptiness in me, without really knowing why … Come on Katie you're not that stupid, you know why …
It's only when I touch my cheek that I notice I'm crying. How, and most important why is she gone? What's happening to her? How is she doing?
There are a thousand questions I so much wanna ask her. But she's not there anymore.
I sigh and then I get up towards the kitchen. A good breakfast will surely help me see more clearly.
I'm in the kitchen since several minutes when I spot the note on the table. "Katie", nothing else … no doubt it's Effy and her legendary conversation … This simple thought makes me laugh.
That's enough, I want to know … I want to understand … I want to be near her. I sit and take my head between my hands. Where the fuck is she?
Let's see it's Effy, and with everything that happens last night, and the state of her, something important is happening to her … she will run away … again …
NO! I CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN! I MUST FIND HER!
I panicked at the idea that it is already too late. SHIT Katie, use your brain for once, where is she?
I MUST FIND HER! I'm her friend and she obviously needs me … Yeah keep saying that and maybe you'll be able to believe it yourself! I need it to … what … no … yes … NO … I'm fine, she's the one not going well. STOP! For fuck sake, I need to be stay focus, where is she?
Clothes, she has to take some clothes and stuff! Yes of course, she'll have to pack some. It seems that after all Emily isn't the only one with neurons.
I dress as quickly as possible and I leave home less than 5 minutes after. It's almost noon, I truly hope that it's not too late yet. I ran as fast as I could. People in the street look at me as if i were some kind of weirdo. And I must say that I can't blame them. Right now I think that I'm totally crazy.
I truly believe that I've never run so fast, but I'm so scared that it will be too late.
Without even realizing it, I'm behind Effy's door. I'm so breathless that I almost collapsed in front of her house. So I wait a few seconds to catch my breath. My heart is jumping right now. I'm so scared…
Suddenly I hear a scream. The cry is so violent, it chills my blood! I can feel it in my whole body!
"YOU'RE JUST A FUCKING LITTLE WHORE! YOU DON'T EVEN DESERVE TO EXIST! ALL YOUR FUCKING LIFE ALL YOU'VE DONE IS SPOILING THE OTHERS LIFE! I THOUGHT I WAS PRETTY CLEAR LAST TIME, YOU'RE NOTHING FOR ME NOW! I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOUR FUCKING FACE AGAIN! YOU HEAR ME! NEVER AGAIN! YOU'RE DEAD TO ME!"
"I know…"
Her voice is so low and full of tears and pain.
"GO AWAY, LEAVE! NOONE WANTS YOU THERE!"
It's so not true … I want you … I mean … here … I want you here!
Then my heart stops when I hear a very brutal blow. Right after I hear some groans of pain, but no sign of protest. OH MY GOD, WHAT'S HAPPENING? I have to go inside, she needs me!
Without any hesitation, I rushed inside. Luckily the door isn't locked.
***Effy's thoughts***
I'm lying on the floor now, I don't move, I let her hitting me. The kicks are becoming stronger. I don't scream in pain, it hurts but I don't say a word. I cry but I make sure to stay silent. I have no right to protest. I deserve all of his shots!
Everything is my fault! For once she was truly happy, and I've spoil everything. She's right I'm a whore. The pain is growing. I touch my belly and when I look at my hand I can see blood on it. The wounds must have reopened. I close my eyes, I can't see her like that. It's my entire fault!
But a voice forces me to open them again.
"STOP IT, STOP IT, YOU'RE GOING TO KILL HER!"
No Katie … don't… let it go … I deserve it. I've slept with Aldo, and she has found us naked in bed. I've broke her heart, after everything she has done for me!
My mother turns to Katie. There is so much hate in her eyes.
"FUCK YOU, HOW DARE YOU COME IN MY HOUSE AND TELL ME WHAT I CAN'T DO!!! WHO THE FUCK YOU THINK YOU ARE?"
"I'M KATIE FUCKING FITCH, AND NO MATTER WHAT SHE HAS DONE SHE IS EFFY STONEM, YOUR FUCKING DAUGHTER!"
My mother approached her I'm scared that she's going to hit her as well
"No, mum … please… don't touch her… she doesn't deserve it… I'm the one who slept with Aldo… I deserve it… not her"
It takes all my strength to say that, but I've to.
Suddenly she's looking at me, his look is so different, and for once I can't tell what she's thinking. She turns to Katie, and then finally she leaves without saying anything. Even without looking at me … This hurts even more that all the kicks … I burts into tears, it's too much… I'm exhausted …
Katie rushes to my side. She lies down beside me, and we stay in the same position than last night. She takes me in her arms. It hurts, but I don't move. I let myself be into her arms. I feel so safe.
If you've liked it or not actually, I care about both point of view just review it so I can know what people think about it, and if I should continue or not ... Thanks Everyone