Count Down to the Big Day – Chapter 4
(Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or any of the characters. They are the property of Ryan Murphy and Fox. I do not own any of the brand names or book titles mentioned in this chapter. Personal names are all fictitious and appear only as a coincidence. Please don't sue me, I'm poor enough as it is.) Rated T
-/-
Rachel, Santana, and Brittany were all of the members that remained in the choir room. Santana and Brittany were excitedly talking about Rachel's trousseau as if the bride-to-be weren't even there.
Finally, Santana and Brittany left to do whatever it was that Santana and Brittany do leaving Rachel standing by herself by the black baby grand piano. Rachel gathered up her sheet music and her books and proceeded to go and look for her prospective bride groom. Artie, Sam, and Mike had whisked him away earlier.
When she and Finn arrived at school after all morning with the family court judge, Finn had parked near the gym. Heading in that direction, Rachel had no idea where Artie, Sam, and Mike had taken Finn. They were probably planning a bachelor party or something.
She headed toward the west wing of the school that housed the McKinley athletic department. Most of the students had gone home for the day. All that remained were teachers, coaches, and random football players.
Heading down a long hall toward the parking lot, Rachel soon spotted Puck leaning against the wall by the girl's locker room door.
"Puck, what are you still doing here? I thought you left half an hour ago," Rachel asked.
"It's Quinn; she's been in there all this time. I would go in and check on her myself, but the girl's soccer team maybe in the showers. Would you mind going in there and checking on her for me?" Puck asked.
Rachel had been giving Quinn space, but she agreed to go in since no one else was around and Puck was concerned that Quinn had been in there so long.
When Rachel found Quinn she was trying to repair her tear stained face. "Quinn are you okay? Puck's out there and he's worried about you."
"I just needed a good cry, that's all," Quinn said splashing her face with cold water.
"Are you upset about Beth?" Rachel asked.
"Who else?" Quinn snapped. She's being passed around like a sack of potatoes, and there's nothing that I can do to stop it."
"What do you mean? You had the chance to keep her when she was born. When we met with the lawyer the day after Shelby died, you had the chance to contest the adoption then. The lawyer asked you what you wanted to do before he asked anyone else," Rachel reminded her.
"You don't get it do you? Just because I can't raise her doesn't mean that I don't love her. I have a scholarship and a chance to get out of this town. I have a chance to do something with my life other than sell houses in Lima, Ohio with my mother," Quinn sobbed. "I don't have time for a baby. I love Beth, but the timing's all wrong."
"Quinn, Beth's already here. She can't wait for the timing to be right. Do you think Finn and I would be getting married on such short notice if Shelby were still alive or if you took her back? Beth needs a home now. She doesn't need more strangers and foster care. Shelby begged me to take care of her before she died. If the state and the courts recognized my dad's marriage as legal, they could be guardians until I graduated from Juilliard. Getting married and adopting Beth was Finn's idea to keep her out of foster care."
Rachel continued, "Finn's the one making the sacrifices here. I'm going on to Juilliard next August and he's going to adopt Beth and stay here with her until I graduate. He's doing all of this just to keep her out of foster care. He told the judge that she had already been passed around enough. You can still see Beth any time you want," Rachel said softly.
"I can't see her! It would be like ripping open a wound! And wouldn't three mommies just confuse her some more? I'm the birth mommy who gave her away. Shelby's the dead mommy, and you're the new mommy who's actually her adopted sister. Rachel I'll say it again, I love her, but I can't raise her. I just wish that she didn't have to go through all of this."
"Quinn, Finn and I wish that she didn't have to go through this either, but she's young. We're going to do our best and my parents and Finn's parents are going to help."
"Finn always wanted her even when I didn't," Quinn sniffled.
Rachel thought for a moment. "Quinn, would you come to our wedding? The rest of the Glee Club's going to be there. You'd have a chance to see Beth and make peace with this guilt that you're carrying around. She's still young. She wouldn't know who you are," Rachel suggested.
"I don't know. I'll think about it. I've got to do something to make peace with myself."
Rachel went out side to tell Puck that things were okay, and Quinn would be out soon.
"It's Beth isn't it?" Puck asked Rachel. "Quinn puts on a brave front, but she feels like a piece of her is missing. I do too,"
"Noah, you're very intuitive where Quinn's concerned. Yes, all of this is about Beth. I asked her to come to the wedding and see Beth while she's still too young to know who Quinn is. Quinn's carrying around a lot of guilt, and she needs to make peace with that guilt."
"I just wish that Quinn would see just how much I care about her and let me help her get past this. Beth's my child too, but Quinn only sees me as the guy who got her drunk and knocked her up. She's been so busy swapping spit with Sam and chasing Finn she doesn't see me standing right in front of her. I miss Beth. I miss both of them," Puck exhaled deeply.
"You do?" Quinn asked softly.
"Of course I do. How long have you been standing there?" Puck asked Quinn.
"Long enough to hear you say that you care about me," Quinn half way smiled.
"Did you notice that I was the only who followed you when you sneaked out of the choir room? I knew that this news was going to hit you hard, so I followed you to make sure that you were okay," Puck asked.
"I wasn't sneaking out, I just felt out of place with the celebrating," Quinn reminded him.
"I'll leave you two alone to talk. The guys have abducted Finn and I need to find him," Rachel smiled as she left Puck and Quinn in the hallway.
Reaching the parking lot, Finn's old blue Chevy truck was still parked where they had left it earlier. She called Finn and could barely hear him; there was so much laughter in the background. "Finn, are you drunk?" Rachel asked puzzled.
"Heck no, the guys just wanted to take me to Mickey D's for a burger and fries. You go ahead and drive Old Blue back to your house. You know where the spare key is. I'll have them drop me off at your place in a while," Finn said between laughing with the Mike, Artie, and Sam.
"Rachel closed her phone before she remembered that Old Blue was a straight drive. Finn had been teaching her to drive a straight, but she still hadn't mastered the clutch.
"Oh no," she thought to herself as she sat in the driver's seat. "If I tear the gears out of Old Blue, Finn will kill me."
As she studied the three-on-a-tree gear shift configuration, Puck and Quinn walked up beside the passenger window.
"So has Finn abandoned you and Old Blue? Has he taught you how to drive a straight drive yet?" Puck asked with his usual smirk.
"Kinda-sorta," Rachel answered.
"Scoot over my Jewish/American princess. I'll drive Old Blue for you and Quinn can follow in her car if that's okay with Quinn?" Puck asked looking at the blond.
Quinn nodded, so Rachel was glad to let Puck drive Finn's prized possession for her.
At Rachel's house, Puck handed Rachel the keys to Finn's truck before he made his way over to Quinn's waiting red car.
"Why do you call her your Jewish/American Princess?" Quinn asked Puck as he settled into the passenger seat.
"Rachel and I are both Jewish in a small town that doesn't have many Jews to begin with. She and I have been going to the same temple since pre-school. Rachel has been strutted around like a princess for as long as I can remember," Puck answered.
-/-
The next week Rachel was sitting in her AP physics class when the intercom buzzed to life.
"Mr. Brown," the intercom whined. "Is Rachel Berry in your class right now?"
"Yes," Mr. Brown said acknowledging the box on the wall.
"Please tell her that Ms. Pillsbury the guidance counselor would like to speak with her when she has a break."
"She can come now. We're just reviewing," the teacher said as he waved Rachel in the direction of the door.
Rachel entered the guidance office and noticed that Ms. Pillsbury had a stack of pamphlets laid out. The top one was about teenage marriage.
"Ms. Pillsbury if you've called me out of class to try and talk me out of marrying Finn Hudson, then you're wasting your time. We went to see my rabbi about marrying us this weekend, and he spent almost the entire afternoon trying to change our minds," Rachel said trying to be polite.
"Rachel it's my job as school guidance counselor to talk to the two of you about this. As you know the marriage failure rate in this country is right now at fifty percent. For teenage couples it's even higher, and it's even higher than that for a teenage couple with a baby. I think what you're doing for Beth is commendable, but she isn't even your child."
"She will be after we adopt her," Rachel said in her own defense.
"What about Juilliard?"
"I'm still going to go. My parents and Finn's parents are going to help us. We're going to live upstairs at my dad's house. Finn's going to community college and work part time for Burt. Have you already talked to Finn about this?" Rachel asked.
"No he hasn't been in yet, but I've already pulled some marriage pamphlets that I wanted to give to you."
Rachel leafed through the pamphlets until she stopped at the one on sex.
"Ms. Pillsbury, I do have one question, and I don't know who else to ask. I can't ask my dads or my rabbi. This is very awkward, but I think you and I may have something in common. What if on the wedding night," Rachel paused, "I can't do it? The whole school knows that your marriage was annulled. Marriages usually end in divorce unless they aren't consummated. Then they're annulled."
"Rachel this is very awkward for a school guidance counselor to be talking to a student about something so personal. I will tell you that our problems were a result of my OCD. You don't have OCD."
Emma changed the subject, "But we aren't here to talk about my problems. I'm here to answer your questions. Have you been in to see your gynecologist for your pre-marital visit? He or she should be able to answer all of your questions."
"I don't have a gynecologist," Rachel answered. "I'm still going to the same doctor that I've been going to since I was a little girl."
"Every woman married or not needs an OBGYN. They do more than deliver babies. You need to get started on some sort of birth control unless you're planning on giving Beth a sibling," Emma blushed.
"Heavens, no!" Rachel said in amazement. "We're going to be lucky to handle a toddler over the next four years."
Emma pulled out a piece of paper and wrote the name of her gynecologist on it. "Here's the name of my doctor. She's young and very easy to talk to. I also wrote the name of a book that you might want to go to a book store and purchase. I'd give you my copy, but I hope to be able to use it some day."
Rachel unfolded the paper to read the name of Dr. Jocelyn Jacobsen - OBGYN written on it. Under her name was the title of the book that Ms. Pillsbury recommended. The Joy of Sex by Alex Comfort PhD.
At lunch Rachel was already eating when Finn caught up to her. She had her cell phone out and was waiting of Dr. Jocelyn Jacobsen's receptionist to make an appointment for her. Rachel explained that the wedding was coming up quickly. The receptionist gave her the last appointment of the day on Tuesday afternoon.
"Hey, Babe. Who were you talking to?" Finn asked as she closed the phone.
"I just found out from Ms. Pillsbury that I needed to see a gynecologist for a pre-marital visit and to get on some form of birth control."
Finn's eyes narrowed as he smiled his wicked half smiled.
"That would be a good idea," Finn whispered. "When you come back from Juilliard, you can play with Beth all day and me all night."
"Finn, don't talk like that in the school cafeteria. What if someone over hears you?" Rachel blushed.
"Do you think all of these people aren't going to know what we've been doing after we're married? No sneaking around, no going home at night. Just cuddling up with you after, you know, and waking up with you the next morning."
"Finn, you talk like every night is going to be a sexual smorgasbord." Rachel whispered to him trying to get him to whisper.
"That's the idea. When you head off to Juilliard, you'll only be home one weekend a month. I plan to start making up for future lost time as soon as we hit the honeymoon suite," Finn whispered in her ear.
Rachel thoughts turned back to her conversation with Ms. Pillsbury. What if she couldn't do it? What if she couldn't please him? That afternoon after school she stopped at the book store and bought the book that Emma had recommended. That night she studied it intently, making notes for her first visit to a gynecologist.
On Tuesday Rachel was ready for her first visit to an OBGYN. Questions in hand, she skipped Glee practice that afternoon and arrived at the doctor's office early. Finn offered to go with her, but she felt that this was going to be awkward enough.
Sitting on the exam table in the traditional open back hospital gown with a sheet over her legs, she was glad Finn hadn't come with her.
Dr. Jacobsen entered the exam room and introduced herself to Rachel. Rachel explained that she was getting married in a few weeks and she needed to be on some form of birth control. She also told the doctor that she was a virgin.
Putting her feet up in the stirrups, Rachel tried to relax and stare at the ceiling.
"Have you discussed what form of birth control that you would like to use with your fiancé?" the doctor asked.
"The pill," Rachel answered.
"Well judging from your wedding date, the pill won't be effective in time. You should use a back up method until you've gone through your cycle completely," the doctor advised.
When the exam was complete Rachel sat up on the exam table. She and the doctor talked at length since Rachel's was her last appointment of the day.
Finally the doctor asked if she had any more questions.
"Doctor, I told you that I am a virgin. I've had boyfriends, but I've never been able to go through with losing my virginity. What if I can't do it on my wedding night? I know that may sound like a silly question, but it has been bothering me. I am marrying the most wonderful guy in the world and I want to please him."
"Rachel, that's not a silly question. Are you worried about the pain of your first time? You are very small."
Rachel nodded.
"Is your fiancé, the doctor paused. "Is he well endowed?"
"Honestly, we haven't gotten that far. I told you that this marriage is an all of a sudden thing. I have an adopted sister that we're trying to keep out of foster care since our mother was killed."
The doctor took a deep breath before she continued. "How big are his hands and feet?" the doctor asked. Nine times out of ten there's a direct comparison between the size of a man's hands and feet and his equipment."
Rachel thought for a moment before she reached in her bag and pulled out a picture of herself and Finn together. He's a foot taller that me, and a hundred pounds heavier," Rachel answered. "He's also the high school quarterback so he's very athletic."
"Is he a virgin?" the doctor asked.
"No," Rachel said quietly.
"I see, then this is my best advice for you. Relax and be responsive, but let him do all the work. If it hurts, then tell him. This isn't a race. You're going to be sore for a few days, but warm baths will help that. Once the soreness goes away, you try initiating the sex. It does wonders for a guy's ego to feel wanted that way. I'm going to give you some information and some lubrication samples. If you have any more questions, please call me. You're getting married at a young age, but I want you to enjoy the body that God has given you. The physical closeness is what will bond the two of you together."
The doctor gave her the prescription for the birth control pills and then wished her congratulations and good luck.
Getting dressed and paying her bill, Rachel was soon out the doctor's front door to find Finn's truck sitting beside her Prius. Finn was sitting in the Prius looking at her copy of The Joy of Sex. Finn had the book turned sideways and was looking at a diagram like it was a center fold.
"Finn would you please put that book down? Everyone can see what you are reading by the way you are holding the book up."
"Man," Finn said almost in a trance. "This marriage thing is sure going to come with some perks. I never knew half of the stuff in this book."
"You make it sound like porn," Rachel said pulling the book from him.
"What did the doctor say?" Finn pouted, unhappy that his reading material had been taken away.
"She gave me a prescription for birth control pills, some reading material, and some samples. We talked about you too," Rachel said examining the size of Finn's hand carefully.
"What about me? Finn asked wondering why Rachel was so interested in his hand.
"As you very well know, I'm a virgin and I'm a lot smaller person than you are. We talked about the wedding night, my first time, and the size of your equipment."
"My equipment?" Finn immediately pulled his hand out of Rachel's grasp and proceeded to cover his junk with both hands. "What does Finn Junior's size have to do with a doctor for ladies?"
Rachel laughed. "Do all of you guys have a name for your penis? You talk like it's a separate little person from yourself."
"Don't be taking about Finn Jr. like that. He might hear you, and there's nothing little about him. I've just always called him Finn Junior. Would you like to know what Puck calls his?"
Before Finn could tell her what Puck called his penis, she cut him off. "No, I don't ever want to know what Noah Puckerman calls his penis. I'm sure it has something to do with a dinosaur or his nickname or something."
"You have no idea how close you are," Finn said trying to hold back the laughter.
"You boys will always be boys," Rachel said shaking her head. "I'm going over to the pharmacy to get this prescription filled, would you like to come over after that?"
"Sure," Finn said. "Can I take your new book home and read it tonight?"
"Yes, but keep it out of your mom's sight. All of this is still a little embarrassing for me. I'm just glad that I didn't get a copy of the Kama Sutra too," Rachel said.
"What's that? Finn asked.
"It's an ancient Indian Hindu text that has a lot of sexual positions and stuff in it," Rachel smiled shyly.
"We'll just have to save that one for our second year of marriage," Finn smiled before kissing his bride-to-be.
-/- Until the next chapter, thank you for following my story, Whistler Nights.