Rogue. This was the dragonslayer curled up in front of Lucy in fetal position, breathes soft but labored, eyes fluttering under the lids in some dream, Lucy guessed. His black hair was ruffled in a messy bedhead, his bandaged shirtless torso heavying up and down. Frosch, (Oh lord, how adorable was Frosh in her cute froggy suit!) was asleep on Rogue's head, something so natural and so perfect it was like it had happened a million times before. Lucy sighed, wishing for something like that, her life hectic and abnormal, especially with Fairy Tail. Her will was devoted to the guild, and she could definitely say it was hard to have and keep up with a social life.

Frosch stirred on Rogue's head just a little bit, then opened her eyes, her nap short lived. She looked up at Lucy, and smiled.

"Are you and Rogue-sama in a thing? 'Cause Fro smelled you on Rogue's cloak, and Fro know Rogue never bring home any girls except the old baker down the street. So Fro know Rogue must like you!"

Lucy's smile fell.

"Huh...?" Was all that she could say. What was Frosch talking about?

"Fro thinks that Fairy-san is very pretty!"

Eh... whatever she was talking about probably didn't matter, Lucy thinks to herself. She smiles at the Exceed.

"Awww! You. Are. So. Adorable!" She squeals.

Frosch blushes. Frosch doesn't think that she's that adorable. There was no doubt in the Exceed's mind that the Fairy Tail member was prettier. And more adorable. Only, Frosch didn't literally think those words, due to her lack of vocabulary, but that's what she meant to think.

"Fro thinks that Fairy-san is prettier!"

Lucy laughs. It seemed that the green feline was adorable AND modest. Rogue was truly lucky to have such a partner. The blonde would give absolutely anything to have this Exceed as a teammate other than the blue one that embarrassed her. A lot.

(Lucy may have had a teensy [huge] crush on Gray when she first met him, a crush on Loke during that fighting festival, and a crush on Natsu during the Oracion Seis battle, but since then, she hasn't had a potential romantic partner. Anyway, point is, Happy always seemed to know.)

"Fairy-san! Fro thinks that Rogue-sama is waking up!"

Hm... Maybe she should go, then. Lucy doubts that Rogue will want to see her as soon as he wakes up.

Before she can contemplate it, she remembers that she hasn't been able to find her wallet. She might as well go look for it. She stands, gives the Exceed a wave goodbye, and exits the room.

"Fairy?"

The word made Lucy stop frozen in her tracks. Sting didn't say it, he was knocked out against the wall. Frosch didn't, her voice didn't match. Rogue….Rogue was looking at her with red eyes slitted, face in a grimace, his stare looking through Lucy's soul.

"Fairy…" he said, trying to get up, an obvious yelp that seemed to shake the room and various medicinal bottles in it. Frosch screamed and tried to pull him back to the bed, and Lucy went running, pushing him softly to the soft comfort.

Rogue tried to push her away, but lifting his arms an animal-whimper of pain escaped his lips and he looked up at the Fairy Tail member with wide eyes, his red eyes staring into hers, her onyx making him stay lying on the bed with her deadly glare. Lucy held him down, hands on his chest lightly, making him stay on the bed. She twisted her face coldly.

"You dragonslayers are all the same, well, except Wendy. The boys I guess. They always insist they're fine, walk 10 feet, then pass out!" Lucy spat. "You will stay on this bed, and don't. Even. Move."

Rogue looked at Lucy and nodded. The woman had a career in drill instructing.

"Fro wants to know if you two will kiss now!"

"Ehhhhh!?" Lucy squeaks, which Rogue secretly thought was the cutest thing ever.

"Fro thinks Fairy-san and Rogue-sama llllliiiiiiike each other!" It seems to Lucy that Forsch has been spending too much time with the other damn feline. This meant that Happy would have hell to pay in the future.

"N-n-n-no, Frosch. We're not. I mean, we. I mean, I-I'm n-not-"

"Only people who are dating do those things, Frosch." And it seemed to Lucy that Rogue was not affected by what Frosch was saying. At all. What was up with this super calm personality even though he had just gotten attacked with a bottle? He was just so….confusing.

….

However, it was quite the opposite. Rogue honestly felt a bit heartbroken by her reaction. She, very obviously, did not want to be in a relationship with him. Figures.

And it hurt. It hurt a lot.

He had faced dragons, defeated demons, and demolished dark guilds. Yet an indirect rejection hurt more than all of that combined.

He felt tears prick his eyes, but he had to be strong through the this paint. At least until she left. Maybe he should help her leave quicker? Hm...

"Fairy. I believe that Natsu-san is calling for you."

And, just in the nick of time, said Fire Dragon Slayer busted through the door.

"Luce! I need another therapist session!" He yells to her, grabbing her hand roughly (which stung Rogue's fragile heart more).

"Me and Lis' got in another fight!" He shouts, as he begins to drag her out.

Rogue sighs, let out a sigh. He had gotten (indirectly) rejected. And it hurt a lot.

"Natsu! How did you find me at Porlyusica's house in the middle of the-"

"Make out with your boyfriend later! I need help!"

The fire dragon slayer pulled Lucy out of the door with a cartoonish speed and ran out into the night, totally not noticing he had run over Porlyusica like twice, now chasing him with a broom on fire . Rogue sighed.

"You have totally just failed at mating."

"SKIADRUM HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN HERE!"

…

This was so frustrating!

Rogue realized he had a mate! Rogue realized he liked-liked this girl! He realized the chance to mate was very, very, very near, (Ya know) but he still didn't listen to his instinct or his jealousy or anything at all! Why was this so tough?

Did Skiadrum raise Rogue wrong? He was always so quiet and calm and he never ever fussed except when he was hurt or ticked off. Maybe Skiadrum just didn't teach him enough. He knew Rogue understood partnership, the act of making babies, where they came from, having a mate…..he'd taught him everything he'd needed to know. Rogue even knew what love looked like, he and Nictrilli had shown they loved each other very much, they'd always been a team, but it seemed like Rogue didn't get it at all.

Skiadrum still didn't have babies to steal!

But, then Skaidrum realised something else.

It was NOT his son's fault. Yet.

It was the mate's fault. The mate was not in love with Rouge, yet. She was not willing to mate. The dragon could not believe that he had forgotten that both of them would have to fall in love before they mated.

That was bad. Very, very, very bad.

No offense to his son, but Rouge wasn't currently particularly... attractive right now. At least not personality wise. Any woman with a brain would find Rouge handsome.

But, the chosen mate wouldn't fall for looks. She'd fall for a personality. An intelligent, kind, strong hero would fit her. Sadly, Skaidrum didn't think that Rouge fit that description.

But, wait! What if... SKAIDRUM COULD CHANGE THE MATE'S TYPE OF MAN?

If that happened... Skaidrum can picture it now...

*Daydream*

Lucy, lying in the infirmary, giving birth, with Rouge on her side, telling her it would all be okay. And then, a baby boy comes.

The nurses wipe him off, then gives him to Lucy, who names him Shadow (A.N. Such unoriginal names, Skaidrum! So unoriginal.) after the baby's grandfather. Lucy hands Shadow to Rouge, who smiles at him. Then, when no one is looking, Skaidrum steals the baby, replaces it with a broom, blending them both into shadows. Then, flies out of the room in shadow-mode, out of the guild, and is never seen again. The end.

*Real Life*

Oh, if life could only be that sweet.

And it could be. All Skaidrum had to do would be show the human how amazing his son was.

Which shouldn't be that hard.

Only it would be. Considering the fact that Rogue doesn't even have a half decent personality, in most people's eyes

He wished so much that Rogue could have a happy family life. Dragon's had a strong sense of their relations, prided themselves on it, so a lonely dragon was somewhat the brain fart of the population. Skiadrum didn't want Rogue to be a loner, it was the ultimate shame!

Skiadrum needed help. Professional help.

And he knew just where to get it.

…..

Mirajane had gotten home rather late that evening, due to an intense session of trying to take away Cana's 'boyfriend'. Eventually, she had just left it up to Laxus and Elfman merely because she didn't want to go all demon soul on the beer barrel.

Closing the door, the barmaid turned to her kitchen to fix last minute dinner and a drink. It was hard work for her. Gajeel and Levy became a thing, so that was a love point for Mira, Lisanna had had fought with Natsu so that deducted ten points, Romeo and Wendy had drooled over each other in the adorable preteen flirting way, that was five points, but the big news that Lucy was crushing on some member of the opposite sex, which turned Mira's detective skills on full drive and her point counter to infinity.

Also, her relationship with Laxus had improved quite a bit, too. They were, surprisingly, the second official romantic couple within Fairy Tail, Alzack and Bisca being the first. Laxus was, secretly, a really romantic man, who never forgot to compliment her when they talked. It made her feel... nice, warm, and fuzzy. She was in love with the man. He was rather adorable at times, especially when he'd gotten attacked by the odd yellow squirrel he'd encountered a few weeks ago.

"Hello, Demon Mage."

The words room an male shook Mira as she worked around the room, seeking someone to put the blame on for the voice. She day nothing but shadows.

"Call me..um... Steve! Er, perhaps. But, I need your help. You see..."

Mirajane listened his problems, seeing no issues,(Steve was probably was a ghost)and analyzed his request as best as she could, as best as an S-Class Mage of Fairy Tail could.

The information he gave her was all that she needed. Also, she needed two specific people, a very attractive male, truth serum, champagne, a pool, and a glass of Pepsi™. (She was currently craving soda, really, really badly.)

The plan that she and Steve were plotting would be the best, most intense, and most thrilling plan that will have you at the edge of your seat.

(Or bed. Or desk. Or couch. Or table. Or wherever you're sitting, really.)