It continued like this for the rest of the day. Everywhere I went I heard whispers about me. I caught phrases like poor girl, dead father, Brittany and Stella popular now, as I walked by cliques and groups of gossiping teens. It made me furious. I had gone from most popular and well-liked chick in high school to the school reject.
But one thing hadn't changed. My best friend was always there for me. Like now.
I had just come out of the lunch line with my tray, surveying the café for a table to sit at. But nothing popped out at me except my old lunch table. It was the biggest in the whole café and it was on a raised platform, part of the add-on to the high school that was put there a year before I came. All my ex friends sat there, laughing and giggling. Stella spotted me and poked Brittany. She too looked at me, standing there by myself and she whispered something to the whole table. A few seconds later, everyone had turned to look at me and laugh amongst themselves. Tears pooled in the corners of my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. I was strong. And I would never let people ever see how weak I was. A hand was laid on my shoulder gently. I turned to see neon pink nails resting on me.
"Come on, El," Cassidy said. "We can sit outside. They put tables and picnic benches out behind the school near the football field this summer." I graciously followed her to the rear door of the café and out onto the back of campus.
From where we sat, we had a full view of the football field. I saw my old boyfriend Bryant playing catch with some of his friends while they were practicing for the game on Saturday. I saw one guy looking my way intently. So intently, in fact, that when Bryant threw the ball to him, it hit him in the side of the face. I snorted. Who could that idiot be?
Then the guy got up from where the ball had knocked him down and I sighed as I saw his face clearly. Oh. That idiot.
Tanner brushed himself off and turned away from me, paying attention to the practice one more.
Cassidy nudged me. "He still likes you," she told me, grinning.
"Yeah, I know," I told her honestly. "But I don't like him in that way any more."
"What did he do, any way?"
"Nothing," I said. "It was perfect." I told her quickly about that day on the beach and how I refused Tanner's calls once I found out my dad died.
She whistled when I was done. "Wow. That's a mess. And I'm not saying I agree to what you did. 'Cause I don't. But it's your choice. On the bright side, you're free again!" she laughed gleefully. I groaned.
"Cass. I will not be dating for a while. I'm still in a minor depression. I need time," I said, stuffing my face with my chicken wrap.
My best friend rapped her polished fingernails on the plastic coated table thoughtfully. "I guess I understand. But I still don't understand what has happened to you. When my aunt died, I never went through the same things as you did." She reached across my tray to swipe a sweet potato fry.
As I swatted her hand away I said, "What are you talking about? I am not different." I realized that as soon as I said this that I was trying to persuade myself as well as Cassidy.
"Well for one thing, when my aunt died, I brought my boyfriend closer. He was my life guard when I was drowning in misery."
Have I mentioned Cassidy is going to major in poetry?
"Also," she continued, "I never gave up anything that was important to me. I kept on designing clothes and writing for the paper. It made me feel better, like nothing bad had ever happened to me. And yeah, I was miserable for a month, but then I went back to my friends and acted like it never happened. Well, not totally. I keep a picture of her in my wallet and have stuff of hers in my room. And not a day goes by without me wishing she was still here," Cassidy finished solemnly. I applauded.
"Very inspiring Cass. But that's you, not me," I said, serious once again. "And yes, I still remember Dad and keep tons of stuff and photos of his. Including this bracelet. Remember when I turned sixteen and he gave me this bracelet?" I showed her my ankle.
"I do! I was so jealous of you. But you hated it, which I can still to this day not understand." We started laughing.
The bell rang from inside. I sighed and got up to throw away my lunch tray while Cassidy waved flirtatiously to one of the lacrosse players that were running towards the football field to practice while the football players gathered their gear and headed towards us to get to the locker rooms. Oh no.
I grabbed Cassidy and started to fast walk towards the door. I heard a voice behind me. Shoot! I wasn't fast enough.
"Ellie! Ellie, wait up!" Tanner was jogging towards us, his curly brown hair slick with sweat and his old t-shirt with the sleeves cut off sticking to his muscular body after the practice.
I ignored him and went faster. Cassidy shot Tanner an apologetic look as he slowed to a walk after realizing I would not slow down to talk.
Cassidy and I had English next. Our second out of 3 classes that we had together.
"I don't get it," she hissed as she glared at a group of freshman gossiping about me and giggling. "He is a perfectly nice guy. And to be honest, I was going to go after him until you told me you guys used to have a thing."
"Cassidy, I told you, I just don't feel it anymore." That part was true. What I didn't tell her was that I knew that feeling was still inside me. Buried deep, but still there. I still felt immensely guilty every time I left him or ignored him and I yearned to see him and be his friend, maybe even more than that, again. But I also knew that that could never happen. My pride was too important.
"Well I don't buy it," Cassidy told me, holding open the door to the classroom.
I couldn't reply because the teacher had already started class and was handing out seats. Thankfully, she was ignorant enough to put Cassidy and me next to one another.
She introduced herself as Miss O' Sherry. Or, as she put it, Miss O. She was obviously Irish, with her last name and pale orange-ish red hair, just lighter than the color of a number 2 pencil.
She called on Cassidy to pass out the list of books we will be reading. I skimmed it over while I waited for Cassidy to finish passing out the paper.
I heard the door open and slam shut, but I didn't look up. I was too engrossed in the list of books, they seemed really interesting and I could not wait to read them.
Which was why when I heard The Voice, I jumped, almost out of my seat and onto the floor.
As it was, Cassidy froze and dropped all her papers on the floor.
Tanner reached down to help her pick them up.
"No, I've got it," she said, throwing me one of her famous Oh no, what are we going to do? We are in so much trouble looks. I shot her back a I have no clue, but get your butt back here so we can whisper about it look and went back to intently reading my list, making sure to fan my hair out around my face and hoping he would not recognize me.
"Sorry I'm late," he told Miss O. "I had to take a shower after football practice, I was so nasty."
"That is quite all right dear. This nice girl here was just passing out papers with our book list on it. Oh, and you can sit right there." She indicated a seat. But I could not see where she pointed because I was staring down at my paper. So I almost had a heart attack when Tanner bent down behind me to whisper in my ear.
"I know that's you, Ellie," he whispered.
He sat down in the seat behind mine. No, not that seat! Anywhere but there!
I furiously turned to face him. "For your information, I wasn't trying to hide from you. Some people actually find reading interesting," I shot at him.
He snorted. "You so do not like to read," he told me knowingly, glancing down at his own list.
"Well then I guess you don't know me as well as you thought you did," I told him sourly, turning back around.
I heard him sigh. "I guess I don't," he said softly. So softly that I couldn't be sure he said it at all.
Cassidy plopped into her seat. Sorry, she mouthed at me. I rolled my eyes and focused on Miss O. She had her back to us and was writing down the supplies needed for her class, so I pretended I was copying the list down and scribbled a hasty note to Cassidy.
Get ready to run as soon as the bell rings. We need to talk. I will pretend I am going 2 the bathroom. Go down the hallway and into the locker room. Meet me at the secret spot ASAP.
Cassidy glanced at it and nodded discreetly. I erased the evidence and tried to concentrate on the lesson.
We had break after this class, so I planned to meet up with Cassidy in our secret room. It was something that I, being a loner who had no friends in any of her classes, had stumbled upon the first week of my freshman year.
*Begin flashback*
I was part of the girls swim team and we were in the locker room showering after a practice on a Friday. All the other girls had gone home, so I was by myself.
I had just stepped out of the shower with a towel wrapped around me, when I heard something. I peered around the corner in the locker room, the wall dividing the lockers and benches from the showers and saw a girl bend over and lift up a floor tile, place something under it, and start to walk away.
When she stood up, she noticed me staring around the corner. She looked surprised at first, then relieved.
"Come here," she said, motioning to me.
And the nervous, shaking freshman I was walked over to her. She held out her hand. I offered her mine and shook it.
"I'm Lacey. Lacey Malcolm," she had said.
"Ellie," was all I said.
She leaned down, picked up the floor tile and retrieved what was underneath it. She held out her hand again and dropped something in my open palm.
Upon further inspection, I found out it was a key. A hot pink key with a silver glitter edge. A black heart with a pink jewel in the center decorated the top part of the key.
"Um, thanks?" I said, looking at Lacey blankly. She really was very pretty. She had bright green eyes and shoulder-length brown hair that was piled up in a crown on the top of her head.
She smiled, revealing a mouth full of straight, blindingly white teeth.
"It's for the secret room," she told me. What?
"Here." Lacey took the key from me and removed another tile, this time from the wall. A keyhole was underneath this tile. She inserted the key in the lock and turned. I heard a click and Lacey pulled out the key. She pocketed it and inspected the wall.
After a few seconds of close concentration, Lacey reached out a pushed on a tile mid way up the wall. I heard another click and several tiles swung inward to reveal a hallway. Cool.
"This is the secret room," Lacey told me. "My mom was the designer of this school and it was nearing my fifteenth birthday, so as a gift, she included a secret room in the plans of the school. The construction workers built it thinking it was going to be a janitor's closet, and not even the principal knows it's here. Only my mom and me. And now you. I use it in between classes and breaks. Go on, it's okay," Lacey told me, motioning me in.
I stepped inside the hallway and walked to the door at the end. I pushed it, and it swung open to reveal my dream room.
It was painted a neon green. The ceiling was black with silver spirals. Bright pink and orange beanbags littered one corner, where a fuzzy neon rug and a shelf full of books sat. The other corner held a glass table and chairs, with an espresso machine, a mini fridge, a blender, and a popcorn machine.
The next corner held a sort of cot with bright multi-colored blankets strewn across it. A little nightstand was beside it, with an alarm clock and a sleep mask. But best of all, a mini flat-screen was across the room on the wall so someone could lay in the bed and watch the TV.
The last corner had a hot tub built into the ground with a rack full of towels and bubbles.
The center of the room was home to a spa chair, a desk filled with nail polish and supplies, and drawers full of mud masks, cleansers, and spa flip flops and robes.
I turned to Lacey who was watching me with waiting eyes.
"This is so cool!" I said. "But why give the key to me?"
"Well, my family is moving so I can go to a private school for senior year. I'm on the field hockey team and if I go to this school, I can get into a really good college with a field hockey scholarship. So, I can no longer use the room. I was just going to drop the key in the hallway and wait for someone to find it and hopefully stumble across the room, but then you came along. There is a spare key under floor tile to the right of the first sink in the second-floor bathroom. There is also an entrance there, but it has a set of stairs since we're on the first floor. You might need this."
She reached into her pocket and handed me a folded sheet of paper. I opened it to find this:
LR- 39, 417, 12
2BR- 12, 5
17, 12
"It's the coordinates for the floor tiles. The first set if the location of the key- the first number is how far along the floor from the door and the second number is how far from the wall. The second is how far from the door on the wall and how far from the base of the floor. The first pair is for the locker room and the second is-"
"For the second floor bathroom. I've got it," I interrupted.
Lacey nodded approvingly as she led me from the room. She took out the key and opened the wall tile. She turned the key and the door swung shut.
She gave the key back and I held onto it for dear life.
She nodded at me and turned to leave.
At the door to the locker room, she paused and turned to look at me.
"Oh, and one more thing. Tell no one."