Chapter Four: This sensation… No, it can't be!
A/N: Don't read this chapter if for whatever reasons you have an… apron related trauma. Or a fetish – I don't want you getting too excited, nosebleeds can be lethal apparently.
A/N: Thoughts – italicised and single quoted
Dialogue – double quoted
Emphasis in dialogue – single quotes or italics or both for extra flavour!
Inner Sakura – single quotes, italics and underlined.
A/N: Please review and fill the review hole in my heart.
"And then he made us do the leaf concentration exercise while he spammed us with killing intent! Lots of killing intent!" Naruto complained.
Hinata stared at her friend in confusion. This was justified because her sensei wasn't a douchebag who routinely subjected three twelve year olds to killing intent. "Uh...that's nice?" she said.
Naruto looked at her flatly. "Yeah, whatever. And then he told us we had to keep a leaf stuck to us for the rest of the day, while we ate, while we showered, even when we went to sleep!"
Hinata noticed, at this point that there was a leaf on Naruto's cheek. "Is that...?" she trailed off.
Naruto sighed. "Yes. Yes, it is."
Hinata didn't really know what to do so she awkwardly patted her friend on the shoulder. "If it helps you feel any better, yesterday Kurenai-sensei went over our strengths and how we should work together as a team."
"Why would that make me feel any better?" Naruto grumpily asked.
"Because she spent a lot more time listing our weaknesses," Hinata sighed. "And I have a lot of weaknesses."
"What?! No, you don't, you're totally strong! You could kick my ass in ten different ways without even trying!" Naruto protested.
"That's not what Neji-niisan would say."
"Neji..." Naruto awkwardly scratched the back of her head, "is not always right."
Hinata giggled. "I never thought you'd say something like that, Naruto-chan," she teased.
A panicked look suddenly blossomed on Naruto's face as she just realised what she had said. "Don't tell him I said that, Hinata-chan!" Naruto pleaded.
"Why? Who knows... it might just impress him," Hinata suggested.
Naruto glared at her.
"Oh, alright, you drama queen. I won't tell him. Happy now?"
"Yes!" Naruto grinned. "But I have to get going now or I'll miss practice! Thanks for meeting up with me Hinata-chan!"
Hinata smiled at her. "Thank you for meeting me so early in the morning Naruto-chan. Let's arrange another time to catch up, okay?"
"You got it!" Naruto was half out the door. "Bye, Hinata-chan!"
Hinata smiled to herself. 'That girl... she never changes.'
Naruto arrived at the usual place to see that, as expected, Sakura and Sasuke had arrived before her.
"Sorry! I was having breakfast with a friend and sort-of lost track of the time!" she apologised.
"Who cares. At least you didn't come an hour late... like some people," Sakura grimaced.
"It's your fault for not coming prepared," Sasuke chastised Sakura, holding up a few playing cards, with a game set up in front of him.
"But Sasuke-kun, playing cards are more fun when you're playing with other people! Now that Naru Naru–chan is here, we can play together to improve our team comraderie!"
Naruto and Sasuke looked at each other dubiously "Whatever. Then, you're the dealer," Sasuke ordered Sakura.
At the revelation that she was going to be playing against Sasuke, Naruto started glaring at him. Sasuke started glaring back.
Sakura promptly whacked them both on the head and Sasuke gave her a betrayed look.
Sakura rolled her eyes at him. "Sasuke, I love you and I think you're the best male ninja ever but sometimes I seriously wonder about your intelligence. Do you really think getting all competitive with Naruto, after Kakashi-sensei just explicitly warned us not to fight each other, is a good idea?"
Sasuke looked slightly hurt – which for him, meant his lower lip twitched slightly. "I wasn't being competitive with her!" he complained.
"Yeah! We were… bonding. We were just bonding!" Naruto yelled, rubbing her sore head and glaring at Sakura.
"But... you were glaring at each other!"
"That's how rivals bond. By staring into each other's eyes for long periods of time," Sasuke explained.
"Pedo-sensei told us not to fight! But he said having a rivalry is healthy! What, you got a problem or something, Sakura-chan?" Naruto yelled.
"Uh...no. As long as your rivalry doesn't turn into mutual sexual attraction, I guess," Sakura replied, still feeling a little bewildered.
'It's totally obvious you're lying though…' she thought to herself.
Naruto and Sasuke both made faces at her.
"Yuck, Sakura-chan! I don't like boys with dark eyes!" Naruto complained.
"I don't like girls who hit me on the head and refuse to deal the cards," Sasuke said, glaring pointedly at Sakura.
"Okay, okay! I'll deal the cards already, so don't be so impatient!" Sakura snuck a glance at Sasuke out the corner of her eye. He was just joking... right?
When Kakashi finally arrived, just half an hour later, he was pleasantly surprised to see his three cute students somewhat getting along and enjoying a card game. "What a cosy little scene," he remarked casually, shunshinning behind Naruto.
Naruto let out a strangled scream and hastily stood up, as the other two just looked shocked. 'I didn't hear him coming at all,' she thought.
Kakashi beamed at all of them. "Great job, you guys! All your leaves are still sticking, even Sakuras'!"
Sakura looked at him in confusion. "Why wouldn't mine stick? Didn't you say I have high chakra-control, Kakashi-sensei?"
"Your capacity is slightly below average according to your academy data. I thought you might not make It." he explained.
"Actually... I am somewhat low on chakra right now," Sakura admitted. "But my leaf didn't fall of my forehead once!"
"Then, since you're low on chakra..." Kakashi paused thoughtfully, "this time I'll teach you guys about chakra transference! Chakra transference is a valuable technique that can be used on the field to partially refresh a comrade with low chakra. This technique requires physical contact so, Sasuke, Naruto, Sakura, if you could all hold one of your teammates hands..."
Sakura grabbed both the hands of Sasuke and Naruto and smiled pleasantly.
'Yes! I get to hold Sasuke-kun's hand!' Sakura thought.
"Now form a straight line." Kakashi ordered. He waited for his students to comply, then continued, reaching over and grasping Sasuke's hand. "All of you shape your chakra outside your bodies and reach out."
When they had all done so, Kakashi projected his own chakra out wards and connected it with Sasuke's. "Sasuke, I want you to pay attention to what I'm going to do. First, I'm going to siphon off your chakra to join my own. This requires the permission of the other party, so when you feel a slight draining sensation don't resist. I will give your chakra back. After I perform this technique, I want you to perform it on Sakura, Sakura you follow on Naruto and Naruto you can try on me. This technique does not actually use any chakra, so once you've felt the effects, all of you will be able to replicate it perfectly - even Naruto who has low chakra control."
Naruto waited her turn and it seemed like it was taking forever because everyone else had to go first. Finally Sakura-chan latched on to her chakra, taking some for herself. It was a strange feeling, a sense of somehow getting lighter, of losing something she hadn't known she had. Naruto waited patiently till Sakura finished, which didn't take very long and moved on to Kakashi. Now it was her turn to reach out for his chakra and grab onto it.
"Um, Pedo-sensei, are we supposed to just sense the chakra or actually feel it?" Naruto asked.
"You should just vaguely have a sense of chakra. It should feel familiar to you as you are used to shaping and using your own chakra by now, but also foreign."
'Oh.' Naruto grimaced. Pedo-senseis' chakra did not feel nice. It felt warm in an unpleasant sort of way and... squishy, malleable, whatever. It felt pretty horrible actually, but then again, what could you expect of chakra that looked like cat vomit?
"Your chakra feels kind of sick, Pedo-sensei. Like actually being sick," Naruto complained.
Kakashi smiled apologetically at her. "Sorry about that, Naruto. Kurenai says almost the same thing but I can't really help it. As a chakra sensor, your abilities are probably enhancing your perception of chakra."
"Yeah," Naruto frowned. "I can sense your chakra floating around near the edges. My chakra doesn't like it."
"And that brings me to my next point! This technique is only to be used in times of emergencies or if the siphoned chakra is intended to be completely used in a short amount of time. The body's natural chakra systems will detect the foreign chakra presence and object to it. In that amount of time, your metabolism will be too busy trying to expel the foreign chakra to produce adrenaline, start cell regrowth or assist other body processes," Kakashi warned. "This form of chakra transference has a name, Chakra siphon. It is used as a basis for some other techniques, ones that can only be performed by highly skilled and capable shinobi. Here are different forms of this, for example using another ninja as an amplifier to make a technique much much stronger, by having them lend you the chakra while you shape it. All of these techniques require training and should not be attempted by genin, even particularly skilled genin," he stressed.*
'So why mention them?' thought Naruto.
Sakura, in direct contrast to Naruto was looking very interested in the whole subject. "What about the amplification technique, sensei? Isn't that just like maintaining the standard technique while you perform jutsu?"
"Yes and no, Sakura. If your ally has a considerably large amount of chakra you run the risk of their chakra suffocating your own and inducing chakra death. If you trust the wrong person, they may do this deliberately. In addition if the two chakras are not kept separate from each other, you can accidentally end up poisoning yourself through chakra contamination. As a side note, some shinobi have very efficient chakra coils that automatically convert and assimilate foreign chakra into their own." Kakashi explained.
"I don't think I can do that," Naruto remarked, very conscious of the foreign chakra in her system.
"I don't think I can either, sensei. My chakra feels a little unbalanced." Sakura said.
"Hn," Sasuke commented. Though only Sakura knew what that meant (or did she?), it was apparent from his scowling expression that he also felt the effects of the foreign chakra presence.
"I expected as much. For the record, I can't assimilate chakra either," Kakashi informed them. Sasuke looked noticeably pleased by this. Silly kid. "Now I want you all to move back and give back the chakra you took. This technique is called the Reverse Chakra Siphon and it follows the same procedure as the last technique, except instead of siphoning off someone else's chakra, in this case you outwardly expel your own for them to assimilate. First I will perform this technique on Sasuke and you will continue as we did last time."
Again Naruto waited impatiently for her turn so that she could get rid of the nauseating presence on her periphery. 'Does all chakra feel this horrible?' She wondered.
Finally it was Sakura's turn, and this time Naruto felt like a part of her that she had lost came back. It was about as satisfying a feeling as a successful trip to the hairdressers. Eagerly she grabbed Kakashis hand and sent his horrible chakra back where it came from. Pedo-sensei could be sort of nice, and he was a good teacher, but she couldn't put it nicer - his chakra felt disgusting.
"Good," Kakashi smiled at them. "Now, I want you to all take turns and reaching out with your chakra, get a feel for your teammate's chakra. No siphoning is necessary this time."
Naruto wandered over to Sasuke while Sakura approached Kakashi. Reluctantly she took Sasuke's hand, hoping that his chakra wouldn't feel the same as Pedo-senseis'. She reached out with her chakra and trying to get a feel for Sasuke's, extended it out towards him. What she encountered was cold, almost impossibly pure refined chakra. It felt - well this didn't make sense, but it felt like silence. Like the eye of a storm.
"Yours doesn't feel as bad," Naruto remarked. "It's still horribly depressing, like your chakra colour but it's not as..." Naruto trailed off. Actually it did feel pretty terrible, just in a less disturbing way. More of a bone chilling way as opposed to a sluggish, slimy vaguely organic feeling. It felt kind of dangerous actually… She stared at Sasuke.
"What?" Sasuke asked irritably.
"U-um, never mind," she knew it wasn't Sasuke or Kakashis' fault they had horrible chakra but she still felt like drawing back from him. Trying to smother the feeling, she grinned brightly at Sasuke, "You done too?"
When he nodded an affirmative 'hn', she moved away - perhaps a bit faster than necessary, and walked over to Sakura. "Ready now?" she asked and Sakura smiled and took her hand. Naruto once again felt that odd sensation of wanting to back away. She didn't want to feel any more horrible, disturbing chakra. She really hoped all chakra didn't feel like that.
Tentatively she reached for Sakura's chakra and the surprise must have shown on her face, because Sakura immediately asked her if anything was wrong. Naruto smiled a sunny smile at her and shook her head. She was pleased to find that Sakura had nice chakra, pleasant and calming. In contrast to her other teammates, Sakura's chakra literally felt like a gentle breeze. Naruto let out a breath she hadn't even known she was holding.
'So then it's just Sasuke and Pedo-sensei,' she realised. Stubbornly, she tried to avoid thinking that their chakra felt horrible because they were horrible people or something was wrong with them. Everyone had different kinds of chakra, it wasn't their fault.
Kakashi motioned for them all to regroup and noticed Naruto was standing a little further away from him and Sasuke than usual. 'What's that about? Did something about my chakra and Sasuke's, and not Sakura's disturb her?' He wondered.
Maybe he should see about getting her to talk to Kurenai. Kurenai was very good at molding chakra, and due to serving as a chakra battery on a lot of tough missions she'd come into contact with a lot of different chakras. She was also a chakra sensor and just like Naruto had complained about the way his chakra had felt. He'd never really paid attention then, but if Naruto was going through the same thing...
"You're all done?" Kakashi asked. When he got two yes's and one 'hn' he continued. "Alright, today we'll be doing two missions instead of one. We'll have a break for training between the two."
Sasuke pouted at him. Well, actually, he only slightly raised his upper lip but that was as close to pouting as Sasuke was ever going to get. "Why do we have to do two 'missions?' Why can't we just train?" he asked.
"Because today I will be teaching you a new technique and I don't want any of you overdoing it," Kakashi explained with a smile.
"New technique, new technique!" Naruto cheered.
Sasuke and Sakura who had longer attention spans merely looked at him suspiciously. They had not been impressed with learning the leaf-training exercise right off the bat.
"A technique you don't know yet. A useful technique," Kakashi stressed. At this they both looked noticeably happier.
"Now here," he threw a mission scroll at Sasuke. "I took the liberty of already picking this up so you three should all go and do your mission and give your sensei some private reading time," he wandered over to his stump and opened up his book.
"Are you serious? It's only a ten minute walk to the Hokage tower!" Naruto complained.
"What made you think I walked? It barely took three minutes," Kakashi corrected. His three adorable genin looked at him with expressions of confusion and bewilderment. How he wished he had his camera... "Sakura, you're in charge."
"Swish, swish, swish - swishy swish swish splash!"
Sakura and Sasuke both looked at Naruto who hadn't stopped singing ever since she started painting the wall. Some of the blue paint had gotten on her nose but she was cheerfully painting the wall with both her hands, punctuating every stroke with another nonsensical word. Coverage was surprisingly even, considering.
Sakura ignored her eccentric teammate and turned back to her portion of the wall. She was painting very carefully, trying to avoid gaps, visible brushstrokes and achieve a perfect coverage. Unsurprisingly she had painted the least area of the three of them. "Swishy swishy swish swish... Swish," She started singing without realising it.
"Hn hn hn..." Without meaning to, Sasuke started humming along. It did seem to make the work go faster...
'Is Sasuke-kun humming?' Sakura decided not to say anything and save him the embarrassment.
Wait! What was he doing?! He abruptly stopped humming as he snapped back to his senses. At least he hadn't been singing...
"Swishy swish splash splash bubbles!" Meanwhile Naruto was completely oblivious to the work of her teammates.
Kakashis one visible eyebrow rose as they strolled into the clearing. "You guys already finished?" he asked in surprise.
"Yep!" Sakura beamed. "Even though Naru Naru-chan and Sasuke-kun got into a fight again, we worked together pretty fast!"
Kakashi looked at Naruto and Sasuke wondering what he was going to do with them. "It wasn't a fight, it was..." evidently Naruto hadn't planned an excuse ahead of time. Kakashi noticed that one entire side of her face was blue, as if someone had tried to use her face as a paintbrush...
"Bonding. We were bonding as teammates," Sasuke finished deadpan. His entire face was covered in blue handprints. Coincidentally, Naruto's hands were covered in blue paint. Right, that wasn't suspicious at all.
But they were smirking at each other, in more of an amused way than a challenging way so he decided to let it go. And Naruto was keeping less of a distance from him and Sasuke so... If that was how they wanted to display their affection, who was he to interfere? As long as they didn't start fighting again.
"Great job!" he congratulated them. "Unfortunately, you finished too early and I don't have anything planned. Go to the Hokage tower and do another mission."
Instantly the pleased expressions on their faces were replaced with mutinous rebellion.
"We should all secretly learn awesome techniques and beat him up!" Naruto declared.
"He's a jounin, Naru Naru-chan. We wouldn't stand a chance," Sakura shook her head sadly. Sasuke grunted in agreement (?), looking more than a little ticked off himself.
Sakura hoisted a crate of the fish onto her shoulder and waited for her teammates to join. "Fresh fish stinks!" she wrinkled her nose.
"You're the one who accepted this mission," Sasuke reminded her.
"I chose this one so we could finish in time for our training! I don't want to miss out because our Jerkass-sensei is being a Jerkass-sensei again!" she defended herself.
"Come on guys, get a move on!" Naruto was already halfway down the pier and had turned back, tapping her feet in irritation.
"When did she get there?" Sakura exchanged a bewildered glance with Sasuke.
"You kissed a fish, you kissed a fish!" Naruto was yelling.
'Oh, they're back,' reluctantly Kakashi closed his book. He wished they could have taken a little longer.
"There is no way anyone but a moron like you would consider that a kiss," Sasuke retorted flatly. "That wasn't even a human. Besides which, there is no way I'm losing my 47th kiss to a fish."
"Wait, wasn't it your forty second you lost to Naruto…?" Sakura asked, confused.
"More people have managed to 'accidentally' kiss me in that time, Sakura," Sasuke explained.
'God fucking damnit,' Inner Sakura thought.
"Your lips touched, it was totally a kiss!" Naruto yelled back.
Kakashi closed his eyes in exasperation and counted to ten. 'Are they ever going to grow up?' He thought, despairingly. He waited until they had all entered the clearing and then turned to the one sort-of sane person on his team. "Sakura, mission report."
"Fresh fish stinks!" Sakura groaned.
Kakashi narrowed his eyes at her. "Very funny, Sakura, now report."
Sakura narrowed her eyes right back. "We took a mission to stock a shop in the marketplace with fresh fish. The mission went exactly as expected. Everyone worked efficiently, without distractions."
Kakashi pointed at Naruto and Sasuke who were still yelling at each other. "Really?" he asked dubiously.
"Naru Naru-chan asked if she could take one of the fish too small to sell. Then she ambushed Sasuke-kun and held the fish's lips up to his. Now she's insisting he kissed the fish," Sakura sighed in embarrassment.
"Right," Kakashi felt like yelling at them until he lost his voice and deafened both of them. Even someone as laid back as he couldn't take all this idiocy.
Before he could, Sakura interrupted him. "She made sure to wait until the mission was over before doing that," she continued reluctantly.
So now he didn't even have a plausible reason to yell at them. They had specifically waited until their mission was over to squabble just to fuck with him. "Sakura," he sighed. "Please don't ever change. Please, please, I don't know what I'll do if I have three idiots on my team."
Sakura nodded reassuringly. "I won't, Kakashi-sensei." Her eyes were fixed on Sasuke arguing with Naruto about something stupid yet again, and she had to struggle to remind herself he was the best ninja ever. Because right now, he sure wasn't acting like it. "I love Sasuke-kun, I love him," she reminded herself.
"All right, come here guys!" Kakashi yelled. Immediately Naruto and Sasuke stopped squabbling and approached him with only a whispered, "We'll settle this with Rock Paper Scissors."
Sasuke nodded in acceptance. "Best out of three?"
"Best out of three."
Well, at least they were managing to schedule their squabbling so it wouldn't get in the way of training. 'I swear me and Obito were never this bad.' Kakashi wondered somewhat belatedly, if he should feel bad for Minato-sensei. Then again he was pretty sure he had never been such a handful.
"So, now I'll teach you guys the shunshin. The shunshin is," at this he paused, disappeared in a cloud of smoke, and reappeared behind Naruto, "a technique that allows ninja to move at very high speeds. Civilians tend to think this technique is instantaneous transportation but that is incorrect. To distract the eye, and cover the path of movement when shunshin is instigated, shinobi leave behind a plume of smoke. Well, usually smoke. Some prefer using other substances such as leaves - very popular in Konoha - flowers, ink, oil etc."
His three students all looked at him with wide eyes. "Awesome," Naruto and Sakura whispered. Sasuke didn't say anything but on his face was an expression like Christmas had come early for him.
"To use this technique is very simple. Simply form the ram seal, and concentrate your chakra creating a shroud of chakra around your body. The chakra shroud around your body will enhance your movements. Make sure to have a clear picture of your destination in mind, as controlling your movement while moving at such a high speed is very difficult. It's best if you start off with moving in a straight line and then working your way up."
"Sasuke," he ruffled the boy's hair. "Your cousin, Shisui Uchiha was famed as 'Shisui of the body flicker' because he was so good at this technique he could even use it in the middle of battle. Some people even gave him the nickname, 'Protege of the fourth Hokage'."
Giving Sasuke something to feel proud about might help him temporarily suppress his pride-related issues for the moment - he hoped.
"Wow! Your cousin was awesome, Sasuke!" Naruto exclaimed. Kakashi noted with surprise that Sasuke looked more pleased at the praise from Naruto, than the praise from himself.
'They're developing a somewhat interesting relationship,' Kakashi thought.
"All of you can have a go at the technique now. It's your first time so don't be embarrassed if you get it wrong. I'm not expecting any miracles," Kakashi advised.
All three of them eagerly formed the ram seal and channelled their chakra.
With some surprise, Sasuke found himself standing right in front of a tree stump, quite a few metres from his desired goal.
As soon as Naruto used the technique a crack like a gunshot was heard and almost instantly, her form appeared on the other side of the clearing, crashing into a tree and rebounding off the surface. "Oww!" she yelled.
Sakura had... Sakura had disappeared from sight. "Sakura?" Kakashi called. In the space of one blink she was back in front of him, breathing heavily and looking exhausted.
"Sakura, where did you go?" Kakashi asked her. "I told you to stick to straight lines and not to try anything too ambitious for a beginner."
"The Hokage Mountain was in a straight line from me. I just thought I'd try it and see how well it worked. It worked!" Sakura cheered.
Naruto and Sasuke gaped at her open mouthed. "Wow, you're awesome Sakura-chan!" Naruto praised.
Kakashi also stared at her, though in a less slack-jawed manner. His students were just full of surprises, it seemed. "You might have even already mastered the technique just like that," Kakashi admitted. "But that was a foolish move. You were already low on chakra from sustaining the leaf-training exercise overnight. You could have collapsed from chakra exhaustion."
Sakura blushed. She was supposed to be the smartest student in the year so how on earth had she forgotten about that? "Sorry, Kakashi-sensei," she apologised.
"It's okay, Pedo-sensei! Sakura-chan can just take some of my chakra, right?" Naruto asked.
"Yep. It'll benefit you too, since you'll be drawing from a smaller pool of chakra. Sakura, use smaller distances but try some different movements. Move in a curved line, move to higher or lower ground and try landing in different positions. Sasuke you're using slightly too much chakra, put less into the technique. Naruto, you have a tendency to overload every jutsu you try with way too much chakra. For half an hour, pay attention to Sasuke and Sakura performing the technique before you attempt it yourself," he ordered.
Naruto moved to transfer her chakra to Sakura. Even though she filled Sakura's reserves to about 3/4 full, the drain wasn't very large. The sense of loss bothered her more than anything. Then, while Sasuke and Sakura performed the technique she moved to a tree stump to observe them. 'This sucks. Even Sasuke is better at this than me,' she silently grumbled.
Sasuke wasn't even moving very far. Was he trying to make fun of her because she accidentally propelled herself into a tree? Naruto noticed Sasuke was moving gradually larger and larger distances, to gauge his chakra usage so that he could grasp the mechanics of the technique.
'That's actually... very helpful.'
For Naruto, with her chakra sensor abilities, by watching him she could slowly see the differences in the amounts of chakra and roughly get a grasp of how much chakra equalled how much distance.
'Naruto, you moron, you better be paying attention,' Sasuke wanted to try larger distances but he was purposely moving in small graduations to help her see how the technique worked.
'Why am I helping her anyway... Well, whatever, the sooner she learns this, the sooner we move onto new training and I end up stronger. This is all for my goal in the end,' he comforted himself, trying to pretend this strategical way of practicing wasn't actually boring him to death.
"Hey, Sasuke! Stop half-assing the jutsu, it's freaking boring me to death!" Naruto yelled. She got how it worked now and watching him was just boring.
Sasuke turned to look at her, formed the ram seal and shunshinned right in front of her, startling her off her stump. 'That's the last time I ever try to help you,' he thought.
Naruto scrambled back up to her feet and glared at him. Sasuke glared back. With a sigh, Kakashi walked over and hit them both on the back of the head with his book. "Back to work," he growled at them.
Simultaneously they both turned to glare rebelliously at him but went back to what they were doing. Kakashi walked back to his stump and practically slumped against it. How was he supposed to control these two?!
Maybe he'd ask Kurenai. Kurenai was good with teenagers.
"Don't talk with your mouth full, Naruto," Kakashi sighed.
Naruto hastily chewed and swallowed. "I wanted to thank you for treating us, Pedo-sensei. Thank you Pedo-sensei!" she grinned at him.
Kakashi glanced around at the other customers, all with shocked looks on their faces. "You can thank me by not calling me Pedo-sensei anymore," he hinted.
Naruto laughed at him. "Don't be silly, Pedo-sensei! But really, thanks for the food."
Kakashi just shook his head. "Whatever." He turned to look at the pile of empty bowls next to her. '1, 2, 4, 7, 8. Eight bowls?! I feel sorry for Iruka.' he thought.
"Did you guys enjoy your lunch?" Kakashi asked. Naruto beamed and Sakura nodded. Unlike Naruto she'd had a normal two bowls. Naruto had... Well he'd started feeling queasy when she started on her eighth so he didn't know. He didn't want to know.
"What about you, Sasuke?"
Sasuke pulled his strange 'squint and it could be called a pout' pout. "There were no tomatoes in my ramen," he sighed morosely.
"Normally they don't put tomatoes in ramen, Sasuke," Kakashi explained.
"Next time we can go to a salad bar," Naruto offered. Kakashi looked at her in surprise. Naruto knew what salad was? "But immediately afterwards we go for Ramen!" she declared. That made sense, Naruto had been the one to suggest ramen after all.
Sasuke almost-smiled a silent thank you at her and Kakashi shook his head. 'What is with these two? Do they like each other or hate each other? And why can't they make up their minds...?' He resolved to ask Kurenai. Kurenai would know. Kurenai knew everything.
"Alright then, you guys have two more hours to train before we go on our next mission. Sasuke, Naruto, continue practicing. Sakura, you've pretty much mastered the technique so why not try using it in battle in a friendly spar with me?"
Sakura quickly backed away from him, shaking her head.
"I'll go easy on you!" Kakashi reassured her. Sakura did not look convinced.
"Hey Sasuke, want to try sparring with the shunshin too?" Naruto asked excitedly. Sasuke's face lit up but before he could answer Kakashi hit them both with his book again.
"You've only just finished moving in straight lines. Go and practice properly far away from each other." he ordered. Again, they both glared at him but moved to do what he said. Kakashi looked at Sakura's face. 'Ah, the normal one. Don't ever change,' he thought.
"That was going easy on me?" Sakura asked dryly.
Kakashi ignored her question. "Congratulations Sakura, you've mastered the Shunshin!"
"But I didn't even hit you once. Even though I was moving so fast and you barely used the shunshin yourself." Sakura complained.
"That's down to practice. Mastering the shunshin is different from being able to use it effectively for battle. You have to get used to moving at high speed first so it doesn't tire your limbs out," Kakashi explained.
Sakura's face brightened up at this and they went off to collect Sasuke and Naruto. Sasuke they found first and he had apparently mastered moving in lines that weren't straight because he was now trying to shunshin up a tree. Naruto, when they found her was doing exactly the same thing.
'Surprisingly, they're kind of similar,' Kakashi thought.
"Now we get to go on our last mission!" Kakashi declared with a pleased smile. All three of his students groaned discontentedly. "Oh come on, I picked this mission especially for you, Naruto!"
"Why me?" Naruto asked suspiciously.
"Because you're my favourite, of course!" Kakashi smiled, ruffling her hair.
"I thought I was your favourite!" Sakura complained.
"I thought Sakura was your favourite!" Naruto protested.
"I thought I was your favourite." Sasuke looked very put out. In a subtle, emotionless way of course.
Kakashi scoffed. "Now, I understand why you'd think Sakura was my favourite and really it's not her fault she has pink hair but – Sasuke? What? Why on earth would you think you were my favourite?"
Sasuke declined to answer, obviously choosing to almost-sulk instead.
"Sasuke, you have no sense of humour, and that's just sad. Sakura has pink hair which again, sad. But Naruto's just an idiot so obviously she's the only real choice to be my favourite!" Kakashi explained.
Sakura and Sasuke looked very disappointed and let down at this.
"I don't want to be your favourite... You're kind of an ass," Naruto complained.
"Did someone say ass?!" Kakashi squealed, blushing a pretty pink. His students were not amused. "Oh, come on, it's funny!" Still, they continued to glare at him. "Well, at least, I thought it was funny..." Kakashi blushed.
"Whatever, you guys obviously have no sense of humour," he sighed in mock disapproval.
"So, what does this mission have to with me again?" Naruto asked irritatedly.
"The mission is to help out Ichirakus Ramen by waitressing during the rush hour of course. And apparently in addition to our reward we get a free bowl of ramen on the house," he smiled at them.
'More ramen?' Sasuke and Sakura both thought, unimpressed.
"Woo, you're the best Pedo-sensei!" Naruto enthusiastically hug-tackled Kakashi, then jumped off still grinning at him.
"I know I am," Kakashi grinned back at her. "Sakura, Sasuke you two should also be happy because I've given both of you a valuable opportunity!" They both stared blankly at him. "Sasuke, you get to look at your two cute teammates in aprons, and Sakura you get to show off your domestic skills for Sasuke!"
Sasuke looked back at him unimpressed though Sakura was starting to look a little bit more excited.
"That's the spirit!" Kakashi patted them both on the shoulder and steered them towards the ramen stall, Naruto eagerly trailing after them.
When he got there he cheerfully greeted Teuchi and Ayane and turned back to his team to educate them. "Do you see," he pointed at Ayame in her white apron, "the charm of a woman in an apron?" Sakura and Sasuke both rolled their eyes at him. Naruto, to his surprise opened her mouth and bared her teeth at him.
"Don't flirt with Ayame-neechan," she ordered.
Ayame giggled and Kakashi merely shrugged his shoulders at her unabashedly. "So, do you have any pink aprons?" he asked, winking at her.
With ceremony, Ayame pulled out an apron from a cupboard and held it up. It was a light shade of pink, thankfully not hot pink, with girlish ruffles around the edges. "Former marketing strategy," she cheerfully explained to Naruto.
"And what a good marketing strategy it is..." Kakashi murmured.
Naruto paled and backed away. "I am not wearing that. No no no no no."
Kakashi scoffed. "Who said anything about you?" He whipped the apron off the counter and neatly tied it at the back of his midsection. "How do I look?" he asked.
Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke all looked at him in horror.
Teuchi and Ayame both grinned at him.
"Perfect!" Ayame announced.
"That'll get us customers for sure," Teuchi beamed.
Naruto's face scrunched up in disgust. "Adults are weird!" she declared. Sakura and Sasuke were inclined to agree with her.
"Here," Ayame handed them all plain white aprons, free of ornamentation and white bandanas to tie their hair back.
'Now this is more like it! Sasuke, what do you think? Am I cute?' Sakura looked at Sasuke hopefully, hoping he was finally taking notice of her. Instead she froze at the image of Sasuke in a white apron tying the bandana around his head. 'That's so girly! But why... does he look so cute?' Sakura covered her cheeks with her hands, trying to will her blush away. 'Sasuke-kun will call me a pervert if he catches me blushing! Stop blushing! Argh, what's wrong with me?'
'Hey, I wonder how he'd look in girls clothes,' inner Sakura suggested.
Sakura turned a brilliant shade of scarlet. 'I thought you'd decided to behave! Shut up! I like Sasuke-kun as a man!'
Kakashi felt a drop of sweat manifest on his face. 'It's so easy to see what she's thinking...'
"Hey, Teuchi-jiisan can I wear a hat like yours instead?" Naruto asked.
"Your hair is longer than mine so you have to push it back with the bandana first," Teuchi ordered, handing her a chef's hat far more voluminous than his own.
"Woah, what an awesome hat! Look everyone, I'm a chef!" Naruto laughed.
Kakashi rolled his eyes at her antics. Teuchis' and Ayames' faces mirrored the same exasperated amusement he felt. Naruto was such a goofball but after a while she grew on you. 'Like a parasite,' he thought to himself with a wry chuckle.
"Hey, Pedo-sensei, do I have permission to transform?" Naruto asked.
"Why do you want to transform, Naru Naru-chan?" Sakura asked, finally tearing her eyes away from Sasuke.
"I don't want to hurt business. And my features are pretty recognisable," Naruto explained, pointing to her whisker marks.
Before Sakura or Sasuke could say anything Kakashi nodded. "Go ahead."
"Right! Henge!" When the cloud of chakra laced smoke cleared from in front of them, standing there was someone who did not resemble Naruto at all. A boy their age with black eyes, auburn hair and an austere look on his face materialised before their eyes. Her clothes had also changed to suit him, instead of her normal attire; the boy was wearing a red haori over formal black robes.
'Wow, he's totally hot. Do you think he's still wearing girls' underwear under those robes?' Inner Sakura wondered.
'You are sick! That's Naruto!' Sakura mentally yelled at her.
"Hihito Higure, at your service," Naruto bowed. Her voice had changed too but instead of sounding masculine it sounded slightly androgynous and she spoke in clipped tones. "I am here to help in whatever way I can."
Sasuke, Sakura and Kakashi all stared at her in surprise. "Have you ever taken acting classes, Naruto?" Kakashi asked. He recalled the very convincing expressions of fear and disappointment her decoy had adopted in the exams.
"No," Narutos' lips quirked slightly into a wry smile. "I'm not a 'master of disguise' or any such thing, this character is simply someone I'm plagiarising from a book."
They kept staring at her. She sounded nothing like Naruto.
"In case anyone is wondering, that book is about five males in a school who are the founders and members of a tea ceremony club. But really this club is a cover for their real activities, as celestials descended to earth they are tasked with wiping out all demonic presence. Then to their great surprise a boy called Hihito earnestly joins their club. Because they are so bad at deception he quickly figures out their real purpose... It's a really good book! And in three months it's getting an anime adaption!" Naruto explained.
They all looked at each other. That sounded like Naruto.
"Oy, 'Hihito' your cover is slipping," Kakashi pointed out.
Naruto drew herself up to her full height and apathetically folded her arms across her chest. "It won't happen again," she promised them tonelessly.
And the cover was back. Well, whatever. "All right, back to work you three," Kakashi ordered, lightly whacking them with his book.
Naruto stretched her arms out lazily as they walked back to training ground 7. "Nothing like a big bowl of Ramen after a hard day's work!" she proclaimed.
"It's only 7pm," Kakashi pointed out. "The day is far from over, 'Hihito'."
Naruto shot him a look. "Are you making fun of me?"
Kakashi smiled back at her with his one visible eye. "Of course not! I'm honestly surprised at how good your acting skills are. In fact it would be nice if I had a kid like that on my team..."
"Too bad, Pedo-sensei! You passed us and now you're stuck with us!" Naruto stuck her tongue out at him.
"Hey Naru Naru-chan," Sakura started.
"What is it, Sakura-chan?"
"If I asked you to prank Ino - to ask her out for a date as Hihito to prove she doesn't really love Sasuke, would you do it?" Sakura asked solemnly.
Sasuke rolled his eyes. Girls could be so stupid. Then again... if he could get Naruto to make Hihito clones and take his fangirls out on dates maybe they would stop bothering him... Well, it was worth looking into at any rate.
"I'd do it if you paid me," Naruto replied instantly.
"Uh...how much?" Sakura asked.
"Not with money. You have to teach me a new technique." Naruto replied.
"But I don't know any you don't know..." Sakura replied in confusion.
Naruto grinned at her. "Then learn one."
Kakashi listened to their conversation with some interest. If Naruto was going to start hiring herself out for pranks he had some people who he thought deserved it... Naruto was an unstoppable force when it came to pranks, if her academy record was correct.
"All right guys, now we're going to get back to the Shunshin! I want all of you to master it before today's over and if you do..."
"You'll teach us a new technique?" Naruto asked hopefully.
Kakashi chuckled at the thought. "No. If you manage to master the shunshin technique, I'll train you to use the shunshin under killing intent!" He beamed at them.
"Not more killing intent!" groaned Sakura.
"At least we're not learning how to stick a pansy leaf to our heads," Sasuke supplied.
"You. Are. Such. An. Ass!" Naruto complained, glaring at Kakashi.
Kakashis ears perked up. "Did someone say-"
"NO!" They all shouted.
Kakashi giggled at the enraged looks on their faces. What a shame he hadn't brought along his camera.
SHINOBI DICTIONARY
Chakra siphon: Reaching out with your chakra to grasp the target's projected chakra, you siphon off a portion of theirs to boost your own. There are drawbacks to this technique – it is only to be used if the chakra is intended to be used up quickly.
Reverse chakra siphon: The exact reverse of the Chakra Siphon of taking chakra you give chakra.
* The other forms of this are forcibly draining an opponent's body of all chakra, using chakra to revive a body that has slipped into chakra death, and as a way to clean an allies chakra of impurities or poisons. These techniques may pop up in story later.
Chakra death: Chakra exhaustion happens when you are very low on chakra – the body immediately shuts down, self-preservation instinct. Chakra death is when for some reason chakra exhaustion does not happen and all chakra is drained from your body. If not promptly treated it will lead to actual death.
Is there a significance to Kakashi and Sasuke's chakra feeling bull awful? Yes. Basically, they both need therapy.
Shunshin: A high speed movement masked traditionally by a plume of smoke. Other substances can be used as well. One example is a mass of leaves – Quite popular in Konoha. This is one of the first lessons learnt after graduation. (Canon technique – unexplored potential)
Naruto and Sasuke's relationship: No comment.
Aprons: Bring out the innate beauty in both man and woman. Adds adorableness to kids. Even Zetsu looks good in one. Team Apron!
Kakashi: He's just messing around with them. Also he can cry and blush on command.
Inner Sakura: Is a pervert? That's original.
Is Hihito important? Very important? Plot relevant? Will he be a cover on a long-term mission? Is he from a real story? Will someone fall for him not realising he is a she and cause WACKY HIJINKS?! No
Is there a point to Hihito? No
Hihito is just a disguise. Other disguises may show up later in story. Naruto reads a lot of manga and watches a lot of anime. If the character or plot resembles a real work this is just a coincidence – I don't have the funds to around stealing franchises nor do I have the time.
END OF CHAPTER FOUR