The first few days after my accident were awful. Every time I talked to someone, anyone, the first thing I received was a worried expression and a question as to how I was feeling. I understand it's just because everyone cares for me, but honestly, I'm accustomed to taking care of others, not others taking care of me. Even after I felt strong again, Lauren continued to return to my farm every weekday morning to help with herding and maintaining the animals for me. I showed her how to shear the sheep and milk the cows, and she loved it. Every day, she'd lead the animals outside, brush and cuddle them, then leave for several hours to play with her sister or Kevin. Around six at night, she'd return, bring the animals in for me, and I'd pay her 30 gold pieces for her days work.
I yank roughly on a stubborn weed that refuses to come from the earth. The one day that Ivan and Dirk watered the crops for me while I was asleep had taken a toll on my fields. They had overwatered them, and the floral pests had taken advantage and rooted themselves quickly. I tug again on the leaves with all my might, and the roots suddenly give under my strength. I cry out as I fly backwards onto my rear, a cloud of dust rising around me.
"Ha ha ha! That weed is really sticking it to you!" someone laughs from behind me. I turn and wipe the sweat from my brow to see Wilbur and Issac walking up the hill towards my farm, waving to me.
"It was a tough one," I agree, rising to my feet to meet them. Wilbur pats me affectionately on my back, and Issac pulls me into a gentle hug.
"How are you feeling today, Gwen?" Issac inquires, his kind eyes tight with concern. I squash down my irritation easily; I've always been quiet, and hiding my feelings comes second nature.
"Healthy as a horse," I reply steadily. The two men and I converse a little more, mostly about the windmills and the weather, before they disappear into the windmill on the western side of my farm to check the cogs.
I return to my gardening, and when I'm satisfied that all my cucumbers will grow unhindered, I walk to town. I greet each villager, giving my neighbors gifts as I make my exit to leave. I enter Angelo's house without knocking, and he's high on a ladder beside his developing sculpture of Felix, chipping loudly away at the wood. I consider calling loudly to him, but decide just to wait patiently.
"Gwen!" Angelo chirps when he finally sees me. "I'm sorry, I didn't see you there." He scrambles down the ladder and places his hammer and chisel on the floor."How's it going?" He asks with a broad smile, dusting his splinter covered palms off on his legs.
"I'm well, I just wanted to come by and check on you, see if you needed anything," I explain straightforwardly.
"Yeah, I'm great, all things good here, captain," he grins, brushing a stray curly piece of hair from his forehead. I roll my eyes, mutter that I'm not his captain, and turn to leave. He pats me on the back with a laugh, and adds, "By the way, your new hat looks great," as I walk through the door.
I touch my hat tentatively as I make my way back to my farm, thinking about Ivan. He and I haven't talked in a few days; whenever I go looking for him after work, he is out of sight. Dirk told me he wasn't hanging around the house as much anymore. I'm worried, and I wonder if he's been avoiding me.
"Hey, look, it's Gwen! Hey, Gwen!" I glance up from my mental reverie, and see Nellie and Claire playing with their children by the Zephyr River. I stifle a shudder; since my accident, I haven't jumped over the river, and I haven't gone fishing. Although it's back to its lazy pace, I just can't steel myself to go near it. "Gwen, come play with us!" Kevin calls again, waving me over. I quickly hand the townspeople each of their daily gifts; a grasshopper for Kevin, an egg for Cindy, a toy flower for Lauren, and fish for both the mothers.
"Gosh, am I glad you're okay, Gwen," Kevin laughs as he kicks the yellow ball to me. "I thought you were dead!"
"Kevin!" Nellie gasps.
"You better watch your tongue, young man, or I'll give you a punishment even your father can't match," Claire threatens as I pass the ball to her.
"Ah, mom," Kevin groans, "I didn't mean anything by it."
"Yeah, we were super worried about you!" Cindy exclaims as she passes the ball to her mother. I smile silently to reassure everyone that I'm alright, and everyone perks up under my quiet response. Things were returning to normal. When Cindy remarks that she too likes my new hat, I reply that it was a gift from Ivan. Although Cindy sours at the idea of her schoolyard crush giving other girls gifts, and I explain that he and I are just friends, Nellie and Claire exchange poorly hidden grins. I must have blushed. I play with the five for another half an hour before looking at my watch.
"Lauren, it's about six," I call across the lawn.
"Okay," she calls back, before turning to her mother and saying, "I'm going to go help Gwen on the farm now."
"Geez, why do you like those stinky animals so much?" Cindy snorts loudly, shaking her head as Lauren comes to stand beside me. I can see the shy girl shrink beneath her sister's oblivious words. "They're so boring, and they take away your play time."
"I…I just like them," Lauren sighs, barely audible.
"Cindy," Nellie snaps, her usual sweet and relaxed demeanor hardening. "You treat your sister nicely, or you'll be in just as much trouble as Kevin." I gently grab Lauren's sleeve and tug her away as her sister received her mother's stern reprimand. We walk silently together, and after a few seconds, when we are out of sight of the others, she grabs my hand and places it on her hair. I pet her lightly, as I know she enjoys, and pull her close to me.
"You know she didn't mean to be cruel, dear," I say to the little girl as I stroke her long, pink locks.
"I- I know," she sighs, picking at a loose thread on her sleeve. Lloyd waves to us from his spot by the river as we pass by, and Lauren and I wave wordlessly back. I keep glancing down at her, but her face is still set in a dark expression. I scoop her up suddenly, and toss her onto my shoulders, my thick muscles from tilling the earth managing the task easily. She cries out in fear from being so high, so fast, but as I begin to charge in a winding path up the hill, making loud airplane sounds with my mouth, her cries turn to giggles. Far off, I can hear Lloyd's usual quiet chuckle boom. Lauren knocks my hat askew on my head as she grips my wavy blonde treads and yanks them to and fro, directing my path.
By the time we are back at my farm, my tongue is tired from vibrating, my legs are screaming for reprieve, and my scalp is throbbing, but she is out of breath from laughing so hard. I flip her down to the ground, and she bats at her hair quickly, trying to clear her face as she grins up at me. "Alright, soldier, get to work, we've got lots to do before sundown," I gasp, trying to get my air back. She giggles, but runs off immediately to take care of my animals. I water the crops for a second time today, and when we are both done, Lauren asks if I'll walk her home.
This surprises me; everyone here in town is like family, there's no one that would possibly harm her. The paths were well lit, and any large predators are frightened by the bustle of the town and the giant windmills. I agree anyway, and after only a few steps, she is tugging on my sleeve. I laugh quietly; so the real reason she wanted an escort comes out. I throw her on my shoulders again, my shy manners disappearing as I try to make the little angel laugh louder and louder. I charge down the hill obnoxiously buzzing my lips and tongue, spinning this way and that as she squeals.
We are "flying" down the lane when I see a surprising figure standing on the bridge into the main part of town. Ivan is looking into the water, with his elbows resting on the railing, deep in thought, when we come blundering into the area. His head whips around in surprise at our obnoxious arrival, and I can see his eyebrows rise in surprise when he sees it is the two shyest girls in town creating such noise.
I stomp to a stop, suddenly embarrassed. I can't explain my emotion, but I feel suddenly very aware of my visual stupidity, and Lauren's laughter and joy becomes less critical. I take her gently from my shoulders, and she is wiggling with guffaws.
"Hello, Lauren," Ivan smiles as we join him on the bridge. "Did you have a good day?"
"Oh, yes," she says breathlessly, her usually quiet voice louder than usual. "I played with my sister and momma and Kevin and his momma, and then I played with Gwen's sheep, they're so soft, and I flew on an airplane!" Ivan glances at me at the mention of an airplane, and I self-consciously fix my sideways hat and disheveled pink coat. "Look!" Lauren continues obliviously, holding out her earnings to her teacher. "I got 30 gold pieces today for working too!"
"Thirty whole pieces?" Ivan gasps theatrically, kneeling down to Lauren's short stature. "Whoa, you must be the richest person in the whole town!"
"You really think so?" Lauren asks, her purple eyes huge saucers at the idea.
"You bet I do," Ivan nods enthusiastically. "You'd better run home and show your mom!"
"She'll be so proud," Lauren nods, beginning to walk backwards to her house, but still talking to Ivan. "I've been saving all my money so I can buy sweets at the bazaar! Bye, Ivan! Bye, Gwen!" Lauren turns and sprints away then, disappearing around the far corner of Raul's store, her green petticoats flying behind her.
"Sorry that we interrupted you," I say uncomfortably as he straightens. I grow acutely aware of my windswept hair and soiled knees as he turns to me.
"Don't be," he replies, "it's good to see her so joyful. I worry about her sometimes. Nice to see your wearing the hat I bought you." Ivan's content grin fades, and a furrow in his brow replaces it as I hide my blush.
"What's wrong?" I ask. Ivan sighs and turns back to the river and leans on the railing, a deep sigh coming from inside him.
"I just got done with an argument with Dirk…I think that he's been the reason Kevin's tom foolery has worsened, and I scolded him. He denied having anything to do with it but….I really lost my temper, and I was much harsher than I should have been." I look away guiltily, although he doesn't seem to notice. Ivan has hit the nail right on the head. Just yesterday, Dirk and I had searched through a dead pile of leaves together, looking for the grossest bug we could find to give to the little boy. But I wasn't about to tell Ivan that. For some reason, the idea of Ivan viewing me just as childish and mischievous as his younger brother made me feel…unsettled. "I just feel terrible," Ivan sighed, rubbing his temple with two fingers.
"Sometimes stuff happens," I blubber unintelligently, instantly cursing myself for not coming up with something better to say. Ivan turns from the river and leans against the railing, looking at me.
"Are you trying to cheer me up, Gwen?" he chuckles, leaning closely to me. I feel my heart thud harder in my chest, and all I can manage is a small smile and a tilt of my head. "You're right, everyone loses their temper from time to time, well, except for maybe you," he continues, leaning a little closer to me. "The fact remains that I was still too harsh though. I'd better go apologize to Dirk." He pushes off the railing and closes the leftover distance between us, our bodies perhaps only a foot apart.
I can feel my pulse choke and the race as he gazes at me with those reserved, serene grey eyes. Breathing has become a new challenge, and I both want to run miles away and also close the remaining distance between us. ""Gwen, talking to you always makes me feel better," he whispers for only me, the singing of the river surrounding us as it slowly slips by. He reaches out, and tucks a stray hair from my cheek behind my ear, his fingertips grazing my skin. "Gwen, I…" I wait. He waits. I'm certain the whole world freezes and waits for him to continue.
Suddenly, the gleam in his rarely expressive, sincere eyes leaves and is replaced with the polite covering that he uses with everyone. He leans back, straightens his bow tie, and finishes with, "never mind". He bides me goodnight, turns and leaves.
I don't move for several years, I'm sure. I finally turn around and begin heading to my secluding farm, but my stomach is filled with crawling ants of anxiety, and I break into a sprint. I try to outrun my nervous energy, pumping my legs and arms in rhythm. When I finally fall into bed, my body is exhausted, but my brain is still racing with unfinished sentences and tender caresses.
For those readers who feel that the last scene is familiar, it is based off of Ivan's Blue Heart Event, and much of the dialogue is from the English translation of the game. I changed the wording a little, and gave it more context into the story though. Thanks for reading, the next chapter will be up soon.