Chapter 3: A Visit

Remus took a steadying breath and raised his fist, hoping he would knock before his nerves failed and he Disapparated on the spot. The only thing that kept him there was the same thing that had worried him for the past five days: Annabeth had seemed to recognise Tonks. When she had asked what he was doing, Remus had shown her the picture. Annabeth's gaze had hardened and she had seemed angry.

Flooded with determination, he knocked on the door of Tonks' London apartment. To his surprise, she answered the door wearing a fluffy pink bathrobe over her pyjamas. Her mousy hair hung around her face in a way he had never seen it before, as though she no longer cared how it looked. Her eyes were puffy from exhaustion and she was thinner than Remus had ever seen her. He braced himself for her to slap him and staggered backward as she flung her arms around his neck and hugged him, instead. Not having been prepared for this reaction, he didn't do the sensible thing, which, to him, would have been to push her away. Instead, he slipped his arms around her waist and tilted his head obligingly as she moved to kiss him. Her lips brushed gently, sweetly across his. After several seconds, Remus came back to his senses and pulled away from Tonks. He glimpsed the hurt in her eyes and allowed her to rest her head on his shoulder.

"D'you have any idea what time it is?" she whispered.

Remus looked over her shoulder out the window on the other side of the small living room of the apartment. A nearly full moon shone through, casting a pale light on the room. "Late?" he guessed.

He felt, rather than saw her nod. "Why are you here?" she asked.

Wordlessly, Remus reached into the pocket of his threadbare overcoat and removed a single rose; the one Molly Weasley had pushed into his hand as he had left her house, saying, "You'd better give this to Tonks. That poor girl's been really down lately, and it's all your fault. This is the least you can do to make it up to her."

"Remus," cried Tonks, "I can't take that! I'll injure myself!"

Remus smiled. "That's why I cut the thorns off."

She took the flower and put her arms back around his neck. "Thanks."

"This is for you, too." Remus gave her a small box of chocolates.

"You're spoiling me," she teased, a huge grin lighting up her heart-shaped face.

"I have something else for you, too," Remus whispered into her ear.

"Does it have a diamond?" she asked. "Does it come from my big, strong, handsome werewolf on one knee?"

"No," Remus stated firmly. "It's something I have important to tell you."

"You'd better come in, then," Tonks said glumly. She removed her arms from his neck as he released her and followed her into the apartment. Once both of them were inside, Tonks pushed the door shut; then locked it. Remus stood awkwardly a few metres away from her. She tucked a loose strand of mousy hair behind her ear. "You can sit down, you know."

"Oh," Remus replied. He stepped cautiously through the messy living room and sat on the plush couch. Tonks stepped less cautiously through the room, overturning several stacks of assorted objects that were merely silhouettes in the half-light of the moon filtering through the smudged glass of the window. She sat beside him and lit a candle with a flick of her wand.

"What's did you want to tell me?" she asked tiredly.

"Do you promise not to tell anyone; not even Molly Weasley?" Remus asked.

Tonks grinned mischievously. "So this is just between you and me?"

"Kind of." Remus took a deep breath. "D'you know a lady named Annabeth?"

"Annabeth...who?" asked Tonks, her eyebrows knitting in confusion.

"Lee, I think," Remus answered.

"What does she look like?" Tonks asked.

"She's about your age; has thick red hair; brownish eyes; a small, pointy nose and a round face."

"Annie!" cried Tonks, her face lighting up in recognition. "I haven't seen her since fourth year! She left that summer and never returned!"

That made sense to Remus. She was after all, a werewolf. "Did she hate you?" Remus asked.

"No," Tonks said. "Not that I knew of unless—Bill!"

"Bill?" asked Remus.

"Bill Weasley," Tonks explained. "Annie was in the year above me. She was in Hufflepuff, too. That girl's heart beat only for Bill, I swear. Whenever she was around, it was Bill Weasley this and Bill Weasley that and 'according to Bill Weasley' all the time. She got so annoying about trying to impress him that one of my friends, to stop her, spread the rumor through the Hufflepuff common room that he had a girlfriend: me.

Remus chuckled and Tonks cuffed him with one of the couch pillows. "What did you do that for?" he demanded.

"You laughed at me!" she teased. "What about Annabeth?"

"She's a werewolf, and she saw me holding your picture," Remus admitted.

"So she knows that we're friends?" Tonks gasped.

"I think so," Remus agree grimly. "That's the bad news. The good news is that Greyback trusts me."

"Oh, Remus, that's wonderful!" Tonks exclaimed.

"I'm friends with his daughter."

"Greyback—the savage, killer werewolf who made your life a misery—has a daughter?"

"Yes, and I should go because I don't know how long she can cover for me," Remus said, shifting uncomfortably.

"Not just yet," Tonks said, tilting her head up to kiss him.

Remus gently placed a hand under her chin and kissed her. As soon as their lips met, it was if nothing had changed between them. Tonks moaned slightly and leaned against him. He continued to kiss her until he felt her warm hands roving beneath his robes.

He pushed her away. "Tonks!"

She looked at him, pain in her eyes. He kissed her forehead. "We can't, Tonks. I've told you a million times we can't."

"Please, Remus. We can leave for a while. No one will ever have to know. I can make your potion myself. I've practiced and Kingsley says it's right. I'll never forget. You can leave the werewolves; just stay here with me. You could be happy for a change. Although, something tells me that being happy's just about the last thing you want."

"I want to be with you, Tonks. I want to be happy. But I just want you to be safe. If I contaminated you…If I killed you…I could never forgive myself."

"What kind of Gryffindor are you? Take a chance for once. Be brave. Don't give me any more of this "dangerous" rubbish. You're a coward and you know it!" Tonks spat.

"Maybe I am. But if my being a coward will keep you safe, then I'll do it," Remus said. "Even if it kills me."

"What makes you think I want to be protected? I could die any day doing my job. I'm an Auror, Remus! Death is just another job hazard for me. Didn't it ever occur to you that I'm losing sleep over you? That could be the end of me right there. If I die as an Auror, it might as well be your fault. How can I keep up my 'constant vigilance' when I don't get any sleep?"

Remus fidgeted, guilty. He couldn't bear to see her suffer like this. "You need to sleep, Tonks. Don't worry about me. Find someone else. Maybe take a vacation. I don't care, as long as you're safe."

"Well, you're a bloody idiot if you think I'm going to do that," she grumbled. "Really, Remus, I thought you knew me better."

"Tonks," he said gently, taking one of her hands, "please. Don't be so stubborn."

"You're being just as stubborn," she said. "I love you, Remus, and I don't care how old, poor or dangerous you are. This is killing you, I can tell it is. You hate it there. I can't believe Dumbledore is making you do this. You don't belong there. I don't care what's wrong with you. You're not one of them!"

He smiled sadly at her. "I know. But he did need a spy and I was the only one eligible for the job."

"We don't need a spy on the werewolves. I thought he trusted Snape to spy on Voldemort himself. Why does he need you to keep an eye on the werewolves?"

Remus sighed. "I've already told you; he thinks I can convince some to come over to our side."

"And from what you've told me, it seems the only one willing to is Sara. Just tell Dumbledore it's not working. Tell him you can't. Please, it's not safe. Why are you allowed to worry about my safety when I'm not allowed to worry about yours?" She had stood and was now pacing in front of the couch.

"I never said you couldn't worry. I just asked you not to," Remus replied, also standing. "I really do need to get going. Even if Greyback isn't expecting me back until tomorrow, I need sleep."

"Don't go," Tonks pleaded. "You can stay here with me."

"I shouldn't."

"I don't care! You need somewhere to stay and you're already here. You can have my bed. I'm sure it's been a while since you've slept in a proper bed. Go on, it's just through there." She gestured to a door that stood slightly ajar.

"I'm not going to take your bed, Tonks," Remus protested.

"You're not sleeping on the couch." She looked dangerous now and Remus knew arguing was going to get him nowhere.

"Neither are you," Remus said, knowing it was futile. "You look exhausted enough as it is and sleeping on the couch isn't going to help that."

"You look every bit as exhausted as I do and you have a much more dangerous job." She grabbed his wrist and dragged him into her room, shoving him down on the bed. "Goodnight." She turned to leave.

"It's your bed. You should stay in here."

"And you're my guest. I should be hospitable to you." Then she grinned. "I think, Remus, that a compromise is in order."

"A compromise?" Remus asked warily.

"Yes. We'll both sleep in here." She smiled, hung her robe on back of her door and climbed into bed next to Remus.

He sat up. "Tonks!"

"Relax, Remus. You just about bit my head off when I tried to seduce you earlier. I'm not going to try it again. At least not tonight…" She gave him another mischievous grin, propping elbow up on her pillow.

Remus groaned but he lay back down and relaxed slightly. "I hope that doesn't mean in the morning."

"You never know." She winked at him and Remus couldn't help but smile at her. She rested her head down on the pillow again, still facing him. "I love you, Remus."

"I—uh…" He trailed off, not wanting to tell her how he felt. She didn't look surprised but she did look a little hurt. He couldn't bear to see her suffer like this. "I love you, too, Tonks," he said, relief flooding through him as he finally spoke the words. "I love you, too."

She smiled again. "Y'know, Remus, you can call me Dora."

"I love you, Dora," he whispered as he kissed her forehead. "That's why I have to do this."

"You don't have to do anything," she mumbled, closing her eyes. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight," Remus replied, yawning. He was so tired that he fell asleep as soon as he closed his eyes.