Margaret looked towards Hawkeye uncomfortably. He had been deathly quiet since they had started driving, almost fifteen minutes ago.
"So," she began hesitantly. "How did you end up working at a children's hospital?"
Hawkeye shrugged. "Someone told me they needed help, so I applied."
Margaret waited for him to elaborate, but when he remained silently she sighed. "No, I mean, how did you end up working with children at all? The last I remember you couldn't stand being around kids."
Hawkeye shot her an icy glare. "Well the last you heard was almost seven years ago. A lot has happened since then."
Margaret felt a sudden, unexpected pang of guilt for not staying in touch with any of her comrades. She didn't feel like defending herself so she fell silent again, and they stayed that way all the way to the hospital. She could tell something was troubling him, but she honestly didn't think he would answer if her if she asked so she didn't bother.
Once they arrived, Margaret struggled to keep up with Hawkeye, her heels clicking noisily against the floor. They took the elevator to the fourth floor and Margaret noticed that Hawkeye seemed strangely out of character, almost scared. He took a deep breath as the doors opened and he stepped out boldly, any trace of fear instantly gone as he shrugged on a pure white lab coat.
A young nurse quickly ran up to him, a worried expression on her face. "She's not doing very well Doctor." She said breathlessly. Hawkeye stopped sighed, running his fingers though his hair as he nodded.
Margaret's mind was racing. Was that why he was here? Did they want him to operate on a child? Margaret felt a twinge of annoyance. She was certain the hospital had plenty of surgeons on staff. Why did Hawkeye have to perform the surgery?
"Her parents…" he began.
The nurse shook her head sadly. "They're not going to be here for at least two hours. Hawkeye nodded solemnly and began to walk down the hall, Margaret clacking after him. He slipped into a dark room and Margaret hesitated. She knew she couldn't waltz in after him, so she backed up a few steps, watching through a large window curiously as Hawkeye sat down next to a little girl, no older than ten.
"Hey Susan," he said gruffly, trying to hold back his emotions. The little girl's eyelids fluttered open, revealing flashing green eyes, contrasting her thick mane of red curls.
"I don't feel so good," she whimpered.
Hawkeye gently touched her cheek and nodded. "I know baby."
Susan used what little strength she had to push herself away from him. He looked at her curiously but then she patted the bed beside her.
Hawkeye smiled and climbed up beside her, pulling her close, so her head was resting on his chest.
"Who's the pretty lady?" she asked. Hawkeye smiled as he looked up at Margaret's form in the window.
"That's an old friend of mine." He said evasively.
"From Korea?" she asked, her interest piqued. Hawkeye chuckled; he should have known Susan would remember something like that.
Hawkeye nodded, "Yeah from Korea," he said simply.
"Are you going to marry her?" Hawkeye smiled and ran his fingers through her hair.
"Nah, she's already getting married to someone else."
"Would you marry her if you could?"
Hawkeye looked down at the child, feigning a strict attitude. "For such a sick little girl you certainly are asking a lot of questions.
"I am really sick aren't I?" she asked seriously. Hawkeye sighed and nodded.
"Yeah baby, you are."
"Am I going to die?"
Hawkeye gasped sharply, completely taken back, he didn't know what to tell the child. How is it possible to tell someone so young that they're dying?
Margaret had noticed that the duo had been talking about her and she moved towards the cracked door, in an attempt to hear their conversation.
"It's okay Doctor Pierce," she whispered. "My Grandma told me about heaven before she died. She said that it's nice there."
Hawkeye gulped down the lump in his throat and squeezed her tightly.
"What's heaven like?" she asked quietly, before erupting in a fit of coughing. Hawkeye held her close until the coughs subsided and then handed her a small glass of water which she pushed away wearily. Hawkeye relented, noting that her energy was quickly draining.
Have you ever been to the ocean?" he asked, feeling the child's head move up and down against his chest. "Well in heaven there's an ocean, but it's so clear, and so bright and clean that it looks like thousands of sparkling diamonds."
Hawkeye looked down at her and continue as he saw her smile weakly. "It's like a big city with a gate around it, but the gates aren't dirty and made of metal; they're made of giant pearls. There's streets winding though it, made of gold; and every person gets their own mansion."
"But what if I'm scared?" she whispered.
"But you won't be, baby. No one gets scared in heaven. And you won't hurt anymore either."
"Not ever?" she gasped in amazement.
"Not ever." He confirmed strongly.
"That's not so bad," she said happily before breaking of in another seizure of coughs. When it was over she whimpered and snuggled closer to him.
"I want my Mommy," she sobbed. Hawkeye stroked her back comfortingly.
"She's on her way, Susan. She'll be here."
"I hurt so bad." She whined. Hawkeye could only hold the child close and listen to her shallow breathing. Another coughing fit came on and this time the child was exhausted. Hawkeye gently played with her hair until her eyes closed wearily. Susan's breathing became more and more shallow and irregular.
Hawkeye closed his eyes tightly as he heard her take a deep breath. He held his own breath, willing her to just keep breathing. Finally he heard her take one more breath and then another, and then there was silence.
Hawkeye stood up, suddenly feeling exhausted. He adjusted the girl's tiny frame on the bed and slowly began to walk out of the room. He passed Margaret without even acknowledging her.
Margaret looked at the child's still form and tears began welling up in her eyes.