Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephanie Meyer.

Chapter 4

The car ride passed in a blur of memories. I tried to forget. I tried to forget the voice, the words, the cuts. They wouldn't go away. Throughout the car ride I felt worried golden eyes on me but no one said a word.

An eternity later, we arrived. I smoothed my dress and almost got out of the car, but a pair of cold, tiny hands stopped me. "Alice," I whispered. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Bella being pulled out of the car by Renee, who was crying and laughing at the same time.

"My baby girl!" she whispered. "My beautiful baby girl!" I looked away.

Alice's eyes found mine. They were huge with fear and sorrow and apologies. "Rosie," she murmured, "I should have seen, I sh-should have been watching you. I'm so sorry—"

"It's okay," I said quietly. "You were… just trying to make this day perfect for Bella. I-I'm just being a baby, it doesn't matter anyway—"

Suddenly, Esme and Emmett appeared at the side of the car. Esme touched my cheek. "It does matter."

Emmett didn't say anything. He just stared at me like he wanted to protect me, but he didn't know how and I knew how badly that hurt him.

Bella pulled away from her mother and came to stand by Esme. "What's going on, is everything okay?"

"Yeah," I said, mustering up what I hoped was a convincing smile. "Yeah, time to get married!" I pulled open the door and pushed past Emmett and Esme and Alice to stand by the door of the church.

Esme squeezed my hand and headed into the church. Emmett stroked my forehead. "I'm here, baby." I smiled and shoved him through the doors.

"Will you be okay?" asked Alice. I nodded. We walked inside the church. I felt male eyes following me appreciatively but it didn't make me feel good like it usually did. I sped up and walked towards my spot slightly faster than the average human would probably be able to. Emmett grinned at me.

"I love you," he said too soft and fast for any human to hear.

The wedding march started and all eyes turned towards the back door. It swung open and Bella and Charlie walked in. The wedding had begun.

As Bella walked slowly up the church, a look of intense concentration on her face (probably trying not to trip), I just stared at her and wondered if she knew what she was getting into.

It took a mind-bogglingly long time, but finally Bella and Charlie were at the front of the church. He hugged her, his eyes looking a little soggy, then he turned and took a seat next to Renee and Phil.

Emmett stood in between Edward and Bella, looking serious for once. He opened his mouth and the traditional words poured out, words that had been said millions of time before, for years and years, maybe even as far back from when Carlisle was a human himself. Emmett turned to Edward.

…I, Edward, take you, Bella, to be my lawfully wedded wife, my constant friend, my faithful partner and my love from this day forward…

I remembered planning my vows with Royce. He looked down on the traditional vows. He wanted something new and modern.

In the presence of God, our family and friends, I offer you my solemn vow to be your faithful partner in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow…

My mother ordered the wedding invitations. I knew they weren't "modern" enough for Royce but he was a gentleman, he would accept them.

I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals, to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live.

He was a gentleman.

I, Bella, take you, Edward…

I turned my mind off. I didn't want to hear these vows any more. I didn't want to be here any more. It was too much. Too much. I felt the shudders closing in and I was frozen again. Frozen in that street.

Bella's voice cut through my mind. "In the presence of God, our family and friends, I offer you my solemn vow to be your faithful partner in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow…"

Jasper was sitting in the front row. I turned to him and without my even asking he sent a wave of calm towards me. My body relaxed. I hadn't even realized how stiff I'd been until now.

The ceremony was finishing. Some people in the back of the church were already shifting in their seats slightly, ready to make a run to the door the minute the last words were said.

I turned towards Bella. Her face was illuminated with a kind of light and joy that I had never seen before. Edward mirrored her expression.

It was like the rest of us weren't even here, like they were in their own, separate world. Maybe this was the right choice for her. Maybe this was the only path her life could take, now that she'd met Edward.

But I couldn't accept that this could ever be the right choice, for anyone.

"To laugh with you and cry with you, and to cherish you…"

I murmured the last words with her. "As long as we both shall live."

-At the Reception-

"You want to talk to me?" Edward said. It wasn't really a question.

"Um. Yeah."

We walked away from the dancers, leaving my Emmett dancing with the newest Mrs. Cullen. "This is fine," I said. I knew he could hear my thoughts but it felt more real to speak out loud.

"When Carlisle created me," I began, "it was really clear, that, you know, he had meant for us to be with each other. You know I never felt that way about you but I did resent that you didn't want me as wife—I was so used to everyone wanting me. Now it's different. I don't care that you don't want me as wife…. But I do resent that you don't even want me as a sister."

He opened his mouth but I shushed him. "I feel like since you found Bella, I've become the bad guy. Is it so wrong that I wanted to protect my family? Maybe I wasn't the nicest but… you are my brother and I hoped you would understand. But instead… I feel like everyone hates me. I don't want you to hate me anymore. I just want to be your sister. I want to be part of this family again. Don't say anything. Just… think about what I said. Please."

Edward looked at me, his eyes full of pain. "I'm sorry."

"Me, too."