I did what I swore I'd never do... I wrote a Valentine's Day themed chapter. I know, I know. I'm weak. Forgive me. It just kind of happened while I was writing it. Don't judge!
Audrey Sharpe was having an awful Valentine's Day. She woke up after an intense drinking competition with Susie where they ended up deciding that Benedict Cumberbatch was gay for Martin Freeman and still going to marry both of them. Completely hung over with a pounding headache, she stumbled her way through her work day at the grocery store. Some short blond guy decided to have a row with the chip and PIN machine, which just made her head hurt worse. Her boss nearly fired her for almost setting the coffee machine on fire (it is possible, believe me) and she had to deal with even more bitchy customers than usual. One frazzled mother went all-out screaming at Audrey when she told the woman that no, customers weren't allowed to return half-drank cartons of milk. As if that wasn't enough, the woman had to set her young kid on the counter, who then proceeded to yank at Audrey's hair. When Audrey tried to scold the kid, though, the mother then decided that Audrey was assaulting her child and swept out, leaving Audrey with an aching scalp and a dripping container of milk.
The only thing that made her day worthwhile was looking forward to her coffee date with Percy. That hot ginger piece o' white chocolate had managed to sneak into her everyday thoughts and routines. He was sweet and awkward, which Audrey loved, but he also had a mysterious side – as if he was hiding something. So not only was he yummy and cute, he was also a bit of a puzzle. To Audrey, who had always had a thing for troubled boys, the only thing that would have made Percy better was if he ran up to her with a big bow on his head, holding out a bouquet of flowers.
This thought managed to keep her sane as the day went on. When she finally got off work, Audrey's day was decisively looking up. She tossed her stupid ugly grocery store shirt in her bag and pulled on a nice warm comfy cute jumper. She strolled out of the store, her smile growing ever so slightly. She hailed a cab and got one on the first try.
See, things aren't too bad, thought Audrey. You're in a nice warm cab, not walking on the street. You have off work tomorrow. Your hangover has virtually disappeared. And you're on your way to a maybe-date with your maybe-boyfriend - on Valentine's day, no less. Things are pretty good.
She was basically bouncing instead of walking when she got to the little coffee shop to meet Percy. She walked in, scanned the room, and realized he wasn't there. Ah, well. She was a few minutes early. She could wait.
So she resolutely took a seat and waited.
12:00, their meeting time, came. He didn't come.
10 minutes passed. He still didn't come.
20 minutes. Not here yet.
Half an hour. Audrey was starting to worry.
An hour. Still no sign of him.
When the two-hour mark came, Audrey's worry turned into anger.
"Of course," she muttered under her breath, standing and storming out of the coffee shop. "How typical."
She marched through the doorway, knocking a nice old lady's shopping out of her hands. This was great. Just great. She could feel her headache coming back. This was so typical of her life. Percy probably forgot about her. Or maybe he just didn't care enough to come back. Or maybe she overdid her quirkiness and he thought she was just weird and scary. Either way, Audrey's entire day came crashing down. She pulled out her iPod and opened the playlist entitled ":(" – a joke Susie invented. When they first met, Susie had been sure to create an angst playlist on Audrey's iPod – just in case some guy ditched her. Audrey braced herself. She never thought this day would come - but here it was. It was time now. Audrey slipped her headphones on, clicked on "Shuffle," and resigned herself to wallow in misery for her entire cold, awful walk home.
Okay, so yes. Percy Weasley did forget about his date with Audrey. He did that thing he always does where he got so absorbed in a work project that he literally didn't think about anything else. He almost forgot to eat and would have gone without lunch had his brother not personally brought him food.
"Here," said Ron bluntly, dropping a corned-beef sandwich on Percy's desk. Percy glanced up, confused, and wrinkled his forehead.
"What's this for?" he asked, confused.
"Food," said Ron. "In exchange for information."
"Fair enough," said Percy, unwrapping the sandwich and taking a bite. "Ugh, corned beef."
Ron lowered himself– rather dramatically, Percy thought – in the chair next to the desk. "Were you or were you not talking to a Muggle girl with the name of Audrey Sharpe exactly a week ago?" he said, steepling his fingers like he was some sort of important detective.
The corned beef sandwich slid from Percy's hands and landed right on top of all his important paperwork.
"Well?" said Ron, raising an eyebrow.
"Oh my god, I'm an awful human being," gasped Percy.
"Huh?" said Ron. "What'd you do now?"
"I was supposed to meet Audrey today – two hours ago – but I completely forgot!" said Percy, leaping to his feet.
"Oh," Ron said. "You are an awful human being."
"Oh god, it's Valentine's Day, too!" said Percy, frantically running his hands through his hair.
"Who's this Valent bloke, and why does he have a day?" said Ron, looking befuddled.
Percy momentarily put his freak out on pause to glare at Ron. "How do you not know what Valentine's Day is?"
"I didn't take Muggle Studies!" Ron said, raising his arms defensively.
Percy sighed. "It's when the guys are really nice to girls and buy them flowers and stuff. Muggle girls turn into monsters when you forget it though! I looked it up on the Googler!"
"So… if Hermione was angry at me this morning… was it because…" Ron frowned, connecting the dots. "Does she just want some flowers? That's it? I thought I had done something really wrong!"
"And chocolate," Percy said. "Lots of chocolate. Now get out of my way!"
With that, Percy dashed out of the door, sending all sorts of important paperwork and one corned beef sandwich flying through the air.
Percy basically sprinted to the little coffee shop, almost forgetting to Transfigure his robes into Muggle clothes. He arrived heaving for breath in the coffee shop, scanning for Audrey. She wasn't there – not surprising, seeing as he was two hours late.
He turned to a little old Muggle woman. "Have you – uff – have you seen – girl – blonde hair – blue streak – probably really pissed-"
"She left, my dear," the old woman said, her eyes twinkling. "She's only been gone about 30 seconds. If you run, you'll catch her."
Percy stammered out a quick apology and ran out the door. He dashed down the street in the direction the old lady said, skidding to a halt before a little roadside florist's cart.
"Roses," he gasped. "I need some -"
"Forgot, eh?" said the florist, chuckling. "Happens to the best of us."
"Just gimme some flowers," panted Percy, slapping what he hoped was Muggle money down on the counter.
"Mate, that's not gonna buy you much more than a couple of weeds," said the florist, furrowing his brow at the money.
"Alrighty then," said Percy. "Confundus." He then proceeded to grab the nicest bouquet of roses there.
"Have a nice day," said the florist dreamily as Percy ran off again.
He ran all the way to the tube station on a hunch – a good one, luckily. He leapt up onto a chair to get a better view, causing a street musician to cry out in protest, almost dropping his saxophone. In the crowded station, he could just spot Audrey's head over the masses of people.
Audrey wouldn't have noticed a jackhammer over her angst music. Every single man, woman, and child she saw just seemed to make her hate life even more. Especially all the couples. Who gave them the right to smooch and show off like that?
Absorbed in her own thoughts, Audrey boarded the train, purposely ramming into a young couple busy sucking face. And of course, all the seats on the train were taken. Audrey let out a few choice words as she was jostled into a tight space between two baby strollers.
Next came a commotion even she could hear. At the doors of the train, a redheaded figure was pushing its way on to the too-crowded train.
Audrey's jaw dropped and she pulled her headphones off. It couldn't be.
But it was. Almost majestically, Percy knocked past two mothers holding huge bags of pink and sparkly wrapping paper. The bags flew everywhere. Pink wrapping paper rolled across the train, painting everything with huge swatches of pinkness. A container of confetti burst, sending pink and white confetti hearts flying into the air, only for them to drift gently back down. Percy got stuck between the one woman and her bag. Struggling to get loose, Percy ripped at the paper bag. It burst, sending pink and red bows flying. Percy, ducking to avoid the woman's wrath, ran straight into the path of the falling bows. A huge pink bow stuck securely into his messy red hair, where it clashed horribly.
Triumphantly, Percy stepped up to Audrey, surrounded by pink confetti hearts. He had a big bow on his head and handed her a bouquet of roses.
Audrey covered her mouth, but a laugh bubbled out anyway. Her worst day in the world had just turned into the best moment of her life.
She looked at Percy, his brown eyes big and pleading for forgiveness. He was still gulping for air. He must have chased her all the way to the station!
In that moment, Audrey realized how bad he must have felt for messing up and how hard he just worked to mend his mistake. Something in her melted a little, and she felt like she grew up. Just a tiny bit.
She stepped forward and took his hand.
"Let's go get some coffee," she said, smiling at him.