This is probably my favorite chapter that I've written so far. :) REVIEW.

Chapter 4: Secrets

The tension in the room was a little too much for Miley. She could practically feel Alex's eyes burning holes into her. Miley figured it was probably awkward for her, but she was the one who had invited herself over.

So not being able to handle it, Miley excused herself to use the bathroom. She took her time, washing her hands slowly, counting to thirty like you were supposed to. Then she took a deep breath and headed back into the living room.

When she turned the corner she saw Nick and Alex making out. She blushed. She had never been a fan of PDA, it kind of disgusted her. Especially when it was between a boy she liked and someone else. Miley decided she would let them continue what they were doing. She didn't want to get in between them in any way, she wasn't the kind of girl who plotted like that.

For the second time since she had been home Miley felt the urge to make herself sick. She breathed in deeply and tried not to run for the bathroom. She remembered what she had been told When you feel like getting sick, you have to find something to distract yourself.

So Miley turned around and headed up the stairs to a bedroom she had only been in once before. She knocked gently on the white door.

It opened, revealing a shirtless Joe. His cargo shorts sat low on his hips showing off green plaid boxers. Miley's eyes looked over his muscular chest and he crossed his arms over it.

"Like what you see?" he asked with a smirk raising an eyebrow at her.

Miley rolled her eyes and ignored his question.

"So you and Nick are done with your little trip down memory lane?" he asked her.

"Oh, well, he and Alex needed a moment…" Miley said flustered and Joe nodded knowing what she meant.

"Why'd you come here Miley?" Joe asked her softly. Miley wasn't really sure. She could have just as easily left the house or just gone outside, but for some reason she had come here. She shrugged her shoulders and moved past him pushing his shoulder and sat down on his unmade bed.

Miley looked around the room. It was the same as the last time she had been in it, save for a few posters of scantily clad women. She rolled her eyes at them. The dark blue walls were the same, the same bed, same dressers, same red curtains. Then she turned back to Joe who had sat down in his revolving desk chair. It suddenly struck her how familiar this scene was. She crossed her right let over her left and looked at Joe.

His eyes started at her feet and then worked their way up her long legs until finally reaching her face. It was too quiet. Joe felt like his heart was beating so loud she could hear it. They sat there for a long time just staring at each other while time seemed to stand still.

Then Miley sighed loudly.

"Alex is so pretty… no wonder Nick likes her," Miley said sounding very small and insecure. She pulled her long legs up to her chest and wrapped her small arms around them, "I could never compare to that"

Something in Joe's heart twitched when he heard Miley say that. He knew that Miley really cared about Nick and it was obvious that she was hurting. For some reason this seemed to be hurting him too, almost as if he was in her position.

"C'mon Miley" Joe reasoned, "You're beautiful, you're nice. Alex is Alex. You're Miley."

"She's perfect. She's so beautiful and thin," she looked like she was about to cry.

Suddenly, he got up and stood in front of her just as he had done three years ago. All he wanted to do was to somehow make it better for her and this was the only way he knew how. He wasn't the kind of sentimental person who could just offer advice. She looked up and stared him in the eyes and didn't back down. Joe was about to lean in when they both heard yelling coming from downstairs. It was clearly Nick's voice. It startled them and their trance was broken. Joe jumped back and Miley looked towards the door.

Joe couldn't make out what they were saying. But he heard Nick's voice again and then Alex's shrieks. Then they heard a door slam.

Miley looked at Joe questioningly and he shrugged his shoulders. Then they heard loud foot steps up the stairs and Miley jumped off the bed and went into the hallway just in time to see Nick.

"Hey" she said worriedly, "What happened down there?"

"We broke up," he said simply. They hadn't, but as far as Nick was concerned it was completely over with her. It had been over the second he had seen Miley agian. All he wanted was her.

Joe stood, still shirtless, in his doorway. It was obvious that Miley had just come from his room. Nick's confused face flew from Joe to Miley and back again.

"What were you guys doing?" Nick asked looking at Joe accusingly. He knew that Joe was a flirt and a charmer, he hoped that Miley wouldn't fall for his tricks.

"Oh, you know…" Miley said, "Just, um, we were just-"

"Talking about boys!" Joe filled in.

Miley turned around and gave him a look and Nick raised an eyebrow at him. That was the best he could come up with? Nick then turned to Miley.

She flashed him her gorgeous smile, "Yeah, Joe's a great listener."

Nick didn't look like he bought it, but he wasn't about to challenge Miley. She wouldn't lie to him, right? She was perfect.

"O-kay," he said, "So Miley, want to go back downstairs?"

"Yeah of course," she said. Nick reached out and grabbed her hand and led her back down to the living room. He sat her back down on the white couch without letting go of her hand.

"Miley," he started and stared into her deep blue eyes, "Do you remember-"

Suddenly Miley's phone started to ring. She gave him a sympathetic look and pulled her hand back. She took her phone out of her pocket and looked at it.

"Sorry, I have to take this."

Nick's heart fell. He really needed to tell her this before he ran out of courage. She walked out of the room and he listened in on her conversation.

"Hey, mom" she was silent for a long time, "I'm sure he didn't mean to… no I'm not taking his side… just talk to him!... okay I'll be home soon!"

Nick heard her cry of frustration. Then he heard her take a deep calming breath. Then she finally walked back into the room. Her face was red and crumpled in anger. He wanted nothing more than to smooth out her forehead and hold her close and listen to her rant about whatever was troubling her.

"What's wrong?" he asked her standing up suddenly.

"Nothing, I gotta go," Miley said blowing him off and heading for the front door.

Nick followed her like a lost puppy. She pulled open the front door and Nick grabbed her arm.

"Don't go," he begged.

"I have to, Nick" she said pulling her arm back.

"Tell me what's wrong. Come on, it's me, we tell each other everything"

"No, we told each other everything. Things change, people change" Miley snapped and left the house.

She walked to her car and pulled her keys out of her oversized purse. She got in the door and drove off. Hot tears stung her eyes. It wasn't fair. She was supposed to be the kid! Why were her parents so immature?

"You don't care about us anymore!" Leticia Stewart screamed at her husband, Richard Stewart.

"I've been supporting this family for years!" Richard yelled back at her.

"You're never home anymore! I feel like I haven't seen you in weeks!"

"That's not my fault; I have a big responsibility at work!"

"Yeah, like showing around that new intern?" Leticia accused.

"Are you implying that I'm cheating on you? Because that's completely ridiculous!"

It was Christmastime and Miley was eighteen years old, she was in her senior year and she should be happy but she wasn't. She was sitting at the dining room table of her grandmother's house with her grandma and her boyfriend of almost a year, Aaron.

Her parents were in the next room fighting. That had been happening a lot lately and it was like nothing Miley could do would stop them.

Miley was looking down at her almost empty plate. In times of stress, Miley ate. It was a terrible habit and Miley hated it. As her parents screams filled her ears she got up suddenly and headed for the bathroom.

The second she was in there her stomach started turning. She breathed deeply and knew what she had to do. She stuck her finger down her throat, her eyes watered and she retched, and then finally got rid of everything in her stomach.

She got up and looked at herself in the mirror. She looked terrible, sickly and pale. She looked down at her stomach. She still felt stuffed and fat.

Making herself sick was something she had started her sophomore year of boarding school. The old money kids she had met there were flawless. She felt like she couldn't compare to them physically. Which made her stress, which made her eat. And so being bulimic was a way to stay thin and in control of something.

She had assumed she would only do it once or twice, but it soon became an addiction. It was a way to control the world around her. Her parents started fighting all the time. Miley had been the glue that held them together, but now Miley couldn't even stand to be around them.

She brushed her teeth slowly and washed her face. Then she left the bathroom. She felt so dizzy and she had a terrible headache. She had never felt like this before.

She walked back into the dining room and smiled at Aaron. Then she passed out on the floor.

The next thing she remembered was waking up and sitting in a hospital bed. Her mom and dad were on one side of her. Her mom was holding her cold hand with tears and her eyes and her dad had a comforting arm around her mom. That was a nice change.

She turned to the other side and saw Aaron. She smiled. It was nice that he was here.

"What happened?" she asked disoriented.

"You passed out sweetie," her father told her looking at her concernedly.

"Oh," Miley said laughing, "Well, that's silly."

Miley began to sit up, "Well, can we go home now?"

"Miley," Aaron said sternly, but gently, "You fainted because you had nothing in your body. It basically shut down because it had nothing to run on. The doctors think you may be bulimic."

"That's completely ridiculous!" Miley exclaimed trying to laugh it off.

But she could tell by the looks on their faces that they weren't buying it.

Halfway home, Miley started crying hysterically. She pulled the car over onto a side street and pulled it into park. She rested her head on the steering wheel just letting the tears fall. Then she pulled out her phone and dialed the very familiar numbers, it rang and then went to voicemail.

"Hey, it's Aaron, I'm not here right now, so leave a message and I'll get back to you. BEEP"

"Hey Aaron, it's me" Miley said into the phone, tears pouring down her face "I- I think I need you. Things are just so… I just… call me please"

Aaron. Aaron was her boy friend for a year before he found out that Miley was a bulimic. Even now she hated the word. It made her feel dirty and disgusting, like there was something wrong with her. He held her hand through therapy, had dragged her out of bed when she wished she could just curl up and die, and had always been there for her. He was the most amazing guy she had ever met.

But between all the therapy sessions and late night phone calls, Aaron had found out Miley's whole story. He learned about Nick, the boy she still hadn't let go of. And he had dumped her. Well, he didn't exactly dump her. But he had decided they were better off as friends. He was also the one who pushed her into spending the summer at home.

Miley collected herself and then pulled out of her spot on the side of the road. Aaron knew everything about her. He loved her even if she couldn't love him the same way. He had promised to be there for her. He was easy to lean on and she really needed someone to lean on right now.

***

Alex was definitely still hurting after her argument with Nick. He had sounded so angry when he told her to get out. She knew she shouldn't have said anything about Miley, but Alex was angry too.

She snuck out of her house, it wasn't like anyone would miss her anyway. Her face was tear stained and her hair was messy and pulled up into a bun, something she rarely did, she preferred to have it hanging in sexily in her face. She was wearing black Soffee shorts and a red tank top. Her face was unusually make-up free.

But she didn't need make up for where she was going. She climbed over the familiar fence, it was probably unlocked, but it was just part of her ritual. She had come here a handful of times in her life, after her father's wedding, after her first time, after Nick asked her out, and a few other times.

Alex walked down the path she knew by heart. Down six and over four, she got down on her knees and stared at the stone in front of her. Fresh tears appeared on her face.

"Hey Mama," she said softly, "I know I haven't been here in a while, I'm sorry. I just need someone to talk to today. Lucy is terrible; she didn't even notice I was upset. You would've mom, I know you would. Dad's good, I think he still misses you even though he acts like he doesn't.

"I wanted to tell you something about Nick, mom. Remember the boy I told you about? I was going to bring him here this summer and show him, let him know about you, what a stupid idea. I think, I think we're over. I can't even believe it," Alex sniffled and cried even harder the tears dripping down her face onto her collarbones, "I just can't believe it. He doesn't love me, mom. He loves another girl. I've never felt this way before and I just don't know what to do…"

Alex didn't bother about looking completely insane. It was past midnight, no one else would be at the cemetery anyway. She continued to pour her heart out until she finally cried herself asleep on her mother's grave.