Dedicated, as always, to wolvesnvamps.

Chapter 4

Edward

Just like that, everything was different.

I couldn't recall the last time I had felt so conflicted- probably because I was human when I had that sort of emotional response to anything.

Bite. I had wanted to drink. The thirst never really went away, although this hospital stay was designed for me to work on my control. An exercise in futility, perhaps.

Fuck. Of course I wanted to. That, too, was something I was unable (unwilling) to control.

And yet-

Possess.

Yes.

I must have her.

Even before the wolf showed up, I wanted to have her.

Not to bite or kill or fuck.

Was it her scent? The blood. Oh God, the blood. Sweet and salt and thick. Like all blood and yet- not. One elegant little drop; one smooth, slick slide down a creamy curve of a finger. Broken capillaries and sliced flesh, enough to sting in sweet pain, enough to sate the hunger that always pervaded, always penetrated, always interjected every civil exchange I would ever want to have with any human.

Perhaps I simply needed to hunt. I had been stupid to waste time reminiscing about past errors in decorum.

I rushed as slowly as I could to an empty bed, yanking the curtain and ripping a few connections as I did. I leaned against the siderail, panting and collecting myself as best I could. I must have looked frightening, so I allowed mundane thoughts to trickle into my awareness, not focusing, consciously letting my mind wander to avoid thinking about her.

It wasn't working.

"Edward," I heard Carlisle call out. He was walking toward me, his expensive loafers tapping out a worried tune as he, too, hurried at a human crawl.

"Yes?" I turned warily, ignoring his pained look as he entered the curtained bed.

"Do you-"

"I'm fine."

"You're sure." His voice was fatherly concern, his tone a warning.

"Of course," I replied testily.

We'll need to have a family meeting about this, he thought, and before he could continue, I defended myself, anger creeping into my voice.

"No. I'm fine. I will not make us leave again." I would get a grip, as they say.

Leave, Edward? Even his internal voice sounded disbelieving, like he couldn't understand why my reaction was really that strong.

"She won't be a problem," I heard myself mumble. Unless you consider the mother of a wolf pack a problem.

"She?" His eyebrows raised, and I realized too late that he had been referring to the wolves, and not Isabella.

Bella, my mind automatically corrected. She prefers to be called Bella.

"Any of them," I said quickly, needing him to believe the lie. I had to get out of there.

"Why don't you go get yourself something to eat," he said, smiling grimly and patting my shoulder.

"I, too, hope it's the hunger," I said, replying to his thoughts. It was probably the hunger.

I waved at several staff members as I made my way toward the ambulance bay. In the short few days we had been there, I had already met every single employee of the hospital. While less than an hour had passed, it was already common knowledge that the new resident had a tiff with the Big Man out on the reservation. Fantastic. We Cullens always made a splash; rarely was it in such a near-inhuman display of drama, but there's a first time for everything.

Thankful for the rain, I dashed off into the surrounding tree line, grateful for once at the lack of excitement in the town being able to hide my desperation to overanalyze what had just happened.

I replayed in my head every detail of the incident, ignoring that I was focusing with a mental caress on every image of Bella Swan.

I noticed that while she wore a ring on her third finger… Jacob did not.

Her name was Swan. Not Black.

I already knew she was his. The scent of his mark on her was unmistakable, now that I was able to recognize it for what it was. I had only been able to focus on the boil in my blood when I saw her, when I smelled her fully. I smiled in embarrassment, realizing that I was like a human male who was rendered blind by hormones and pheromones and the promise of sex.

I had to replay the incident over and over, feeling my tension and anger flowing out of my legs and footsteps with each pound on the forest floor. Carlisle's disbelieving stare and following glare as Jacob burst in; Bella's shocked look and was it guilt? as she was whisked into his hulking arms. Her uneven breathing as she placed a small hand on the beast's chest. The crack of her neck as she swiveled her head, panicked, looking from her wolf to me.

She didn't know what to say. I could see it.

But I couldn't hear it.

I came to a full stop right there in the middle of the woods, a brief break in the tree tops letting dusty sunshine line my lashes. I saw flashes and dots in my vision, and I didn't know if they were reflections or my own woozy revelation as I realized I couldn't remember her thoughts.

I had never heard them.

I had been so blinded by the rush of venom to both my mouth and dick that I hadn't noticed that I couldn't hear her fucking thoughts.

As if I needed another reason to see her again.

Who was this Isabella Swan, and how could I get onto the reservation without breaking the treaty?

All excellent questions.

I forced myself to hunt, knowing that I would not be able to get any answers with both my thirst and lust leading me around; at the very least, I could slake the need for blood. I continued, deeper into the forest, forcing the clear air into my useless lungs, directing my thoughts with each breath.

Bella. Breathe. Wolf. Exhale.

Right. The wolf. Her low rasp and furious gasp as he took her from me, her pained expression that I could not yet identify. My mind was already defending it, hoping she was annoyed with her rescuer for taking her away.

I couldn't be certain. I had never tried to analyze anyone's expression for. I hadn't really needed to.

Enigma. Isabella Swan was an enigma.

As I allowed the hunting instinct to control my body, my mind traced over her features, imagining how her eyes would crinkle at the corners when she saw me next. I ignored the reality that creeped in- that she would most likely sic her dogs on me when we met again- instead thinking of her hair, of her finger with the faint trace of blood on it, hastily rubbed on her jeans. The blood. Crack of the neck as I reach my prey; crack of her neck as she glared at either me or Jacob.

Mm last thoughts as I sank my teeth into the hot, spurting flow of blood were of Bella- an imagined moment as I traced my nose down her neck. Her pulsing vein, the tiny capillaries under her sweet sweaty skin like pinprick stars in the sky. I would stare at them, pondering my place in the universe and how she would be when with me.

But the last thing I could remember was the exhilarating and completely unsatisfying mouthful of blood as I envisioned Bella and the accompanying erection as I mentally replaced the deer in front of me with her warm body.

XXXXXXX

Sorry, someone had to go and take a vacation.

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