I'm baaaaack!! -Insert screaming in the background here-.
I am SO SORRY about taking so long to update! I just had a lot of crap going on... that, and I'm absolutely horrible at prioritizing. So, of course, I can't just update regularly like regular authors.
The standard disclaimers apply. Trust me, if I owned Death Note, it'd be somewhat of a yaoi-paradise. But I'll spare you from that in here. -smile-
Thank you so much for reading, and please review!!
L's Stalkers
Part Four
Naomi and Brittany: DESTROY MISA!!
Light stood up from his seat on the couch as he heard a soft knocking upon the door. Crossing the room, he sighed, sincerelyhoping that Matsuda wouldn't try and tag along with him and L again. He had been developing a very bad (and annoying) habit of that- almost worse than him talking of "Misa-Misa" incessantly. Once at the door, he reached for the handle and turned, pulling it slowly open…
…Where he was promptly hit in the face with a frozen waffle.
Growling and glaring, he now beheld his worst (and strangest) enemies. The dreaded fangirls had returned. It was like a cheap horror movie. "Naomi and Fred, HOW the Hell did you manage to get back in here?!"
Brittany and Naomi simply stood in the doorway in front of Light, smiling and looking like they had gotten in a fierce battle with a tree… and lost. Brittany managed to pull yet another twig from her hair as she said, "We have our ways, Light… and we have our leaves." She brushed a few more leaves from her brunette head. "And why must you insist on calling me Fred?" she asked, scowling.
Light shrugged, still standing before them. "I don't know. I can never remember your actual name, but Fred just seems to stick. I'm always able to remember Naomi's, though."
Naomi managed to brush a handful of leaves from her short, black hair. "You can probably only remember my name because it's the same name as Naomi Misora, the FBI agent that you killed because you're KIRA!"
Light glowered vehemently as he yelled, "I'M NOT KIRA! And how would you even know that?"
Naomi smiled innocently in return, nodding. "Oh. Okay, Light. I can see that you're not Kira. I believe you."
The auburn-haired boy opened his mouth… then closed it when he realized just what the smaller fangirl had said. "You… you actually believe me?" he asked bewilderedly.
Naomi's smile quickly faded. "Nope," she said. "I lied."
Light scowled, glaring as he closed the door in their faces. He turned around… only to find the two fangirls standing comfortably in the middle of the large living room. He stared baffled, his chestnut eyes growing wider. Said eyes then angrily narrowed as he yelled, "How the HELL do you two keep getting in here?!"
Naomi simply smiled, doing all she could to further irk the boy with soft hair. What could she say? He was funny when he was mad. "As we've said before, Light, we have our ways." She then began to look around the apartment, examining the halls and listening for any annoying high-pitched giggles of a certain blonde slut….
Light raised an eyebrow, his eyes now curiously following the small girl. "What are you doing…?" he asked, though he knew that he probably shouldn't.
For, as they all say, curiosity killed the Kira.
Brittany walked over to him, her brown eyes large and innocent as she slightly raised the pitch of her voice to a more sweet tone. "We're looking for a girl," she said softly, "who talks like this and thinks that she's the greatest thing ever, right after you." She got very close to Light, resting her hands lightly on his chest. Brown hair fell into her face as she innocently batted her eyelashes.
Light's face turned red, unsure of what to make of the brunette fangirl getting so close to him. "Um…" he stumbled, getting a bit flustered. "Uhh… M-Misa, you mean?" he managed to get out.
Brittany immediately lost the cute act, backing off of Light. "Sweet, so she's here?" Her voice had already returned to its normal pitch.
Light's face fell, realizing that the cute brunette had merely been messing with him. "Why do I even bother…?" he muttered under his breath.
Brittany then skipped off, joining Naomi in search of their most hated enemy. Listening closely, the two of them could barely make out an annoying child-like voice….
"She's in there!!" Naomi exclaimed, pointing towards the door to the guest bedroom. She began to run towards it, Brittany following suit. Light walked behind them, unsure of whether he really wanted to get into this situation or not.
Naomi and Brittany were flattened against the wall, one on either side of the door, secret agent style. "Okay," Naomi said in the barest of whispers. "Just remember, sneak attack, but make it BOLD. Don't scare him off, just her." Brittany nodded. "You bring the secret weapon?"
The brunette nodded once again, smiling wickedly. "Yeah, I brought it," she whispered back.
Naomi smiled, bright white teeth shining as she said, "Awesome!" She controlled the urge to clap her hands.
Light shuddered, as if he didn't want to know what the "secret weapon" was. Actually, he didn'twant to know. He silently asked himself why he was here again, his eyes darting back and forth between the cute but strange fangirls.
Ah, that was why.
Brittany took a deep breath, readying herself for the task at hand. Naomi nodded, silently opening the door by a crack. The two started counting down.
"…Three…"
"…Two…"
"…ONE!!"
Naomi and Brittany burst through the door, finding L reading calmly in a chair. Looking up from his book, he waved. "Hello again, Naomi and Brittany."
The two fangirls squealed softly before turning their attention to the blonde girl standing in the middle of the room. Misa's large blue eyes widened, staring at the intruders in a bit of overdramatic surprise. She had a few dresses laid out upon the single bed; she wore a frilly navy one with lace at the bottom and parasol to match. Her long yellow hair was tied up into two small ponytails at the top of her head- her usual fashion. If you asked either of the fangirls, they would have testified that her hair was really the ONLY cute thing about her. "Who are you two," she asked in a high-pitched voice that belonged to a whining five-year-old girl, "and why are you storming into Misa-Misa's room?"
Naomi practically growled. Brittany would've stepped back in shock, had she not been consumed by anger at the pop idol. Naomi rarely got angry, and when she did, she seemed pretty deadly. "No," the dark-skinned fangirl spat, "I think that the real question is WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH OUR L?!" She pointed one accusing finger at Misa; the blonde's eyes widened even more (if at all possible).
L picked up his head from his book yet again, disheveled raven hair sticking out in all directions. He raised one dark eyebrow, nearly smirking at the prospect of the fangirls calling him 'theirL'. His dark, omniscient eyes scanned the two girls, making them silently swoon under his beautiful and penetrating gaze. "Misa was merely showing me a few dresses that she bought today," he explained in his soft and articulate voice. "I assure you, nothing more was going on between us. You have no reason to worry."
Misa quickly interrupted the beautiful resonation of the detective's words with her own voice before the fangirls could truly relish it. "Yeah!" she said, her much-too-large eyes glittering. "Misa-Misa was trying on all her pretty dresses! Do you want to see them, too?"
Naomi heard Brittany growl, and her own eyes narrowed into a glare at the hated 'Misa-Misa'. "Alright, that is IT!!" she screamed, taking the annoying model completely by surprise (though that wasn't extremely hard to do in its own right). "Brittany!! Release the secret weapon!!"
"FINALLY!!" Brittany exclaimed. From, almost literally, out of nowhere, she produced a small black gym bag with something small moving inside of it. Grinning madly, she unzipped it, letting the open bag drop to the floor and giving whatever was hidden inside a chance to escape. She ran over to Light, crying out as she jumped for him.
Light, extremely flustered and confused by now, yelled out in surprise as he somehow managed to catch her at the last possible second. "What-what are--?" he tried asking, though the girl in his arms made him flush for some reason.
"You'll see," Brittany muttered darkly, a malicious edge of happiness in her voice.
And there, standing in the middle of the floor and waiting to attack, was a terrifying, ferocious, deadly, bloodthirsty…
…Squirrel?!
"You have GOT to be kidding me," Light uttered incredulously. "You brought a freaking squirrel?!" Brittany nearly smiled in return at the auburn-haired boy, her grin portending evil. It made Light almost want to shudder.
Misa beamed, reaching over to the squirrel. "AWWWW!!" she exclaimed, hurting the ears of all others present in the room. "What a cute little squirrel! It will look so adorable with Misa-Misa's Chocolate Brown Cocktail Dress™!"
The squirrel looked up at her, big black eyes filled with the utmost innocence as it sniffed the air.
…And then it attacked.
Lunging at Misa, the squirrel let out some sort of high-pitched war cry. Naomi could have sworn that its little beady eyes were glowing bright red. The Secret Weapon then began gnawing at Misa's ankles, making her cry out in pain.
"Aaaah! Get it off of Misa-Misa!" she yelled, trying her hardest to shake off the rodent that had attached itself to her… with its teeth.
Brittany let out a bout of evil, maniacal laughter that would have fit perfectly in any horror movie. Light, yet again, slightly feared for his life. He was just too pretty to die yet.
The blonde ran out, the evil attack squirrel at her heels (literally). Laughing loud and happily (and evilly, I should mention), Naomi pointed a finger to the door through which Misa had escaped. "And STAY OUT!" she proclaimed in triumph. She was smiling proudly as she turned to face L again.
"Well, I've never thought of sending an attack rodent after Misa," the detective muttered thoughtfully, "let alone a squirrel. Perhaps I shall utilize this tactic the next time she becomes uncooperative…." He looked back up at the fangirls, one thumb pressed to his thin lips. "So, Naomi and Brittany, how are you?"
The two girls softly screamed, almost vibrating in glee. They were happy- they were once again alone with the object of their utmost affections, no annoying blondes to get in the way.
That is, of course, until Brittany thought of something.
"But… but we're just going to, like, smother him if it's the both of us trying to talk to him," she pointed out, one finger at her lips in a very L-like fashion.
"Oh… yeah…" Naomi replied, her smile fading. She placed a hand to one of the Misa-style pigtails tied in her short black hair. "We don't want to suffocate him. I mean, we both love him way too much to let him die…." Here, she cast a very pointed glare at Light, who didn't seem to notice. Which was probably best.
"So…" Brittany continued, still pondering a solution to the issue at hand. L looked onward, intrigued by how the fangirls were going to 'spare him', so to speak. Light, still carrying the brunette (who had gotten very comfortable in her current position), groaned in exasperation.
The brunette bit her lip, computing an answer. "So… uh… do you want to… take turns?" she finally asked.
"I GET TO HAVE HIM FIRST!!" Naomi practically screamed, her face immediately brightening up.
Brittany smiled, happy to have thought of a solution. "Alright, then. You have a half-hour with L," she said. "After that, I'll have a half-hour. Light and I will be waiting in the living room."
Naomi squealed happily, jumping up and down in joy, rapidly clapping her hands. "Yay!" she squeaked.
Light sighed, rolling his chestnut eyes as he started to walk to the living room, Brittany in tow. "Have fuuuuuuuuuuuun!" she called back to them as Naomi closed the door.
L stared back at her, his large dark eyes catching a faint violet glow in the reflection of the lamplight. He looked to the nightstand that stood by his side, reaching for a box of Panda Cookies. He opened the box, popping a few of the small snacks into his mouth. Once he finished chewing, he offered the box to the small girl. "Would you like one, Naomi?" he softly inquired.
Naomi squealed yet again, happily taking a few Panda Cookies.
THISISALINEYOUARETOTALLYJEALOUSOFTHELINEBECAUSETHAT'SWHATYOURMOMSAIDANDOHYESIDIDJUSTGOTHEREBECAUSEYOU'REJEALOUS
Meanwhile, Light and Brittany sat in the living room, on separate couches. The brunette girl looked over at Light, biting her bottom lip softly. Shrugging, she crossed over to his side, taking a seat right next to him.
Light's chestnut eyes glance over at the cute brunette, trying to stop his face from turning red around her. He hurriedly looked away.
Brittany simply stared at him, her heavily lined eyes opening wider. She pondered… thought… tried to gauge his reactions….
But, of course, as she couldn't do so earlier, she couldn't control herself now.
"SNIFF!!"
"This is going to be a long damn half-hour," Light muttered bitterly as she seized his head to smell it.
- THE END! Until Part Five….
A/N: Hahaha... that was fun!
Again, about the Misa-bashing. I actually like her a LOT more now. Then again, I'm further into the series. I admire her devotion and she can actually be cute sometimes. But in the Yotsuba arc (and anytime before that), she is damn ANNOYING. However, in general, Naomi and I both agree that we don't totally hate her.
Takada and Kira are another story... from which I shall spare you. (I absolutely ADORE Innocent!Light. I love him- he's so adorable! However, I HATE Kira!Light and just want him to die by being impaled on a metal spike. Because I'm just that morbid).
And am I making Light fall in love with me? ...Possibly. Hey, Matsuda's gonna show up sooner or later for Naomi. Do I think that Light would like me if I actually met him? HELL NO- he'd be running in the other direction.
-evil cackle- I love my imagination.
And stay tuned, because the next chapter is one that many of you have been wating for. Let's just give you this subtle hint...
"YOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUU!"
-yet another evil cackle- Again... POOR, poor Light.
Thank you SO MUCH for reading, and remember- REVIEWERS GET PANDA COOKIES!!