I usually take five to six days to review, but it's spring break and I don't feel like doing the little homework I'm supposed to be doing.
So yeah, at 3 minutes to 11 I'm posting this chapter. If it seems rushed near the end, it kind of is. I've been working on this chapter all day and I kept getting distracted with reading stories, watching movies, and writing a one shot for "Love Taps" (which use to be Shots at Victory. The title is a Work in Progress).
Reminder: The very first chapter (the prologue) was written by WellNowWhat and you should totally go read her work. She's an amazing writer!
Hm...I guess that's it. I'm gonna try (TRY) to work on my homework tomorrow since it'll be due Tuesday and I'm a major procrastinator so I might not upload any new chapters for any of my stories. But knowing me and my ADHD, I'll probably skip out halfway through my homework and work on a chapter for something.
Anywhore, please read and review, telling me what you think of this. If you read this whole chapter, then I'd like to say thank you. If you review it as well, I'd just like to say THANK YOU SO MUCH BECAUSE YOUR REVIEWS MEAN SO MUCH TO ME.
Goodnight lovelies!
-Skye
"Chapter 3 – Clarissa Didn't Explain This"
"Liar, Monster, Deceiver, Disgrace. The words drip from your tongue with such a flawless grace. The lips of a coward speak so well the words of the brave. I never knew hate until I met you." – The Paramedic
My mother is gone long before I wake, just like she is every morning. She never leaves a note and she never says goodbye. I guess it's hard to miss someone you never see.
My father should be finishing his breakfast consisting of a bagel, black coffee, and a newspaper with the New York Stock Exchange readings just about now. When I head downstairs, he'll be stepping out the door telling me to "have a nice day at school" without a kiss on my head or a hug like normal fathers would do. Beck used to kiss me on the top of my head and hug me before we went to separate classes…
Christ, I'm not gonna take a day off so I can wallow in stupid misery!
I quickly get dressed, it doesn't matter what I where; it's all black and will never clash. I end up wearing black leggings that come halfway past my knees under a spaghetti-strap top that billows down in layered lace halfway down my thigh as well as my favorite combat boots. If I was a slut, this would be a dress and I wouldn't have the leggings under it, but I'm not so it isn't a fucking dress.
I head downstairs just as my dad is getting up from the table and grabbing his keys. "Bye, Dad," I call as I clomp down the stairs. He doesn't look at me as he progresses to the door. "Have a nice day at school," he tells me as he opens the door. I sigh and mutter something to him as he closes the door.
I didn't want a hug or a kiss anyway…
I make my way to the refrigerator and wait for the sound of my father's car. My hand slides around for something—anything—and I absentmindedly pick up the milk, I think. I hear his car start up outside as well as him revving it up. I slowly trudge to the kitchen table and set the milk down. Then I see his car drive off past the window in the living room.
Finally!
I pick the milk up and throw it back into the fridge before kicking the door closed. I make sure I've got my phone before I run to the key hooks by the door and I snatch my keys. After locking the door, I jump in my car and speed away.
There's one place I want to be and one person I want to be there with, but I have to go back to Hell in order to get her.
I try not to think of anything as I drive to Hollywood Arts. I turn the radio up as loud as possible and hook it to my PearPod. It's on shuffle and it starts to play "Clarissa Didn't Explain This" by The Paramedic. That was the last song I was listening to before I turned off my PearPod.
"You were my biggest mistake. I should have never believed in you. We knew exactly what was at stake, Darling. Nothing you said was true."
I roll my eyes and bring my hand up, slapping it down on the steering wheel. Great! This song is exactly what I need right now. With a loud groan I push the button to change songs. When I hear the guitar of "I'm Not a Vampire" by Falling in Reverse, I smirk darkly. A song like this is just what I need to keep my mind off things!
I belt out the words along with the delightfully sinful Ronnie Radke.
"Well I'm not a vampire but I feel like one," we sing. "Sometimes I sleep all day because I hate the sun…light! My hands are always shaking, body's always aching and the dark is when I feed…Well I could lure any woman that I want to in my bed with me!"
I sing the rest of the words with Ronnie on the way to school. If I was with him, I'd never let him out of my bed. I'd wreck him in a minute…
Some other song comes on just as I reach the school—probably something by Bullet For My Valentine—and I kill the engine. I turn off my PearPod and lock it before I get out of the car and make my way into school.
Once inside, I see B-him surrounded by a group of girls at his locker. Last night we changed our relationship statuses to make it official. It hasn't even been twenty four hours yet and the vultures are already after him.
He's not my problem anymore.
I walk past him, not bothering to look at him. Then I see Cat standing alone by her locker. I sneak up behind her and put my hand over her mouth. "Don't make a sound," I hiss in her ear. My redheaded best friend shakes under my grasp but she doesn't even squeak. "We're skipping school and taking a little ride," I tell her. "Don't say anything, got it?" Cat nods and I take my hand off her mouth.
I grab her wrist and we walk outside together. Along the way I hear her start to speak and I grimace. "Don't even think about it," I remind her. She gasps softly and we exit through the front doors. As soon as she gets in my car, she speaks.
"What's going on?" she asks. "Where are you taking me?"
I roll my eyes and start my car. It's deathly quiet because its radio is still hooked to my PearPod. "You and I are gonna take a trip to the mall," I tell her. "I need something nice for the party, something that will make everyone remember me." Cat fidgets with her seatbelt. "But why, Jade?" she questions. "People remember you already." I scoff at her ignorance and grip my steering wheel tighter. "Because, Cat," I start through gritted teeth, "This is the first time in years I've been without a boyfriend. I don't intend to stay single for long and a party's just the place for me to meet someone, if only for a night. Understand what I'm saying?"
Cat whimpers and nods. "Why couldn't we wait until after school?"
I slam my hands down on my dashboard and let out an annoyed scream. I turn to her with hatred in my blue-green eyes. "If you don't want to come, then get the hell out of my car!" I scream. Cat screams and curls into a ball, crying softly. I sigh and lower my eyes, feeling guilty. I reach my hand out to her and touch her shoulder. "I'm sorry, Cat," I breathe. "I didn't mean it; I'm just not in a good mood. You don't have to come if you don't want to, okay?"
Cat sniffles slightly then looks up at me with puffy eyes and a weak smile. "It'll be fun," she says. "Can I get something too? I have a little bit of money…"
I smile slightly to her and nod. "Sure, Cat."
~*You were my biggest mistake*~
Cat and I arrive at the mall maybe ten minutes after that. She bounces out of my car and screams how she has to pee. I roll my eyes, feeling a sense of déjà vu, then head inside after her. I wait for her to come out of the first bathroom in the mall then we head to PJ Kenny's. I'll let Cat get whatever she wants first.
She jumps up and down throughout the store, looking at the jewelry they have as well as the dresses. She ends up buying a $40 topless pink satin dress that comes to her knees and has a little bow on the hip. It's got dark pink polka dots on it too as well as ruffles at the bottom as well as the top.
It's perfect for her.
After she buys a little pink headband with a bow on top as well as a ring and a butterfly necklace, we head to Jasper's—my favorite, dark clothing store.
A dress would be too girly for me.
So after thirty minutes of searching for the perfect clothes while Cat cowered in fear behind me because of the "scary music and posters," I find this deliciously dark black-lace top with a dangerously plunging neckline and sinfully sweet black skinnies with holes cut all over the legs and knees. I also pick out a diamond studded bat necklace as well as a black-coated eyebrow ring.
While Cat's total comes up to $54, my total comes up to $260.
Nothing but the best when you use Daddy's credit card, right?
I check my phone after we leave the store and I've got two missed calls and four text messages. Make that five. The calls and the first three texts are from him, while the last two texts are from André. I roll my eyes and don't bother to check his messages and skip down to André's.
9:30 AM, Nov 6
Beck saw you leave school today and he told me he
texted you. He wants to know where you are and if
you're okay. He wants you to send him a text saying
so. Did you take Cat with you? No one can find her!
10:00 AM, Nov 6
I realize you don't want to talk about him, so I'm
sorry for bringing it up. I'm sorry things ended the
way they did and even though he's my best friend,
I want you to know you can talk to me if you need
to…or if you want to… Oh, and if Cat's with you,
tell her Robbie misses her.
I fight the urge to roll my eyes at André's sweetness. He's always so nice to me, even when I'm mean to him. I don't get it.
Then I smirk.
I could definitely use André to get back at him. I mean, what's better than getting back at your ex than by sleeping with his best friend? That'll be great!
I look to Cat who has her ear buds in her ear and is dancing and singing to a song on her PearPod. I pull one out of her ear and she looks at me. "What was that for?" she asks with slightly hurt eyes. I laugh softly.
"I wanted to know if you wanted some lunch," I tell her. Cat squeals in happiness and takes off for the Food Court. I laugh softly again and walk after her at my original pace.
It's funny how someone so small and bubbly can bring out the best in me, you know?
I get to her just as she's bouncing up to Chicken Chuck's and we order two chicken sandwiches, two fries, and two drinks before we pick a table under the ginormous skylight as we wait for our order. A few minutes later, the call out our number and Cat joyfully goes up to get it.
While she's gone, I take my opportunity to text André back.
9:30 AM, Nov 6
Beck saw you leave school today and he told me he
texted you. He wants to know where you are and if
you're okay. He wants you to send him a text saying
so. Did you take Cat with you? No one can find her!
10:00 AM, Nov 6
I realize you don't want to talk about him, so I'm
sorry for bringing it up. I'm sorry things ended the
way they did and even though he's my best friend,
I want you to know you can talk to me if you need
to…or if you want to… Oh, and if Cat's with you,
tell her Robbie misses her.
10:45 AM, Nov 6
If you MUST know, Cat and I are at the mall because
she's helping me with something. Thank you for your
offer, Andre, it means a lot. I told Cat about Robbie.
Hey I was wondering, are you going to that party
Friday night?
Cat comes back with our order just as André texts me back. I wait for her to hand me my food and start eating her own food before I text him back.
9:30 AM, Nov 6
Beck saw you leave school today and he told me he
texted you. He wants to know where you are and if
you're okay. He wants you to send him a text saying
so. Did you take Cat with you? No one can find her!
10:00 AM, Nov 6
I realize you don't want to talk about him, so I'm
sorry for bringing it up. I'm sorry things ended the
way they did and even though he's my best friend,
I want you to know you can talk to me if you need
to…or if you want to… Oh, and if Cat's with you,
tell her Robbie misses her.
10:45 AM, Nov 6
If you MUST know, Cat and I are at the mall because
she's helping me with something. Thank you for your
offer, Andre, it means a lot. I told Cat about Robbie.
Hey I was wondering, are you going to that party
Friday night?
10:47 AM, Nov 6
Nah, I can't. My parents are going outta town and
I gotta watch my grandma. Last time she was left
alone she ran out into the street trying to throw
Holy Water at the cars that were passing by. Sorry.
I grimace again. So much for that plan. Oh well, I guess I can get him sooner or later. Revenge takes time.
I text him back something "nice" and put my phone face down on the table. I look up at Cat as she's finishing her chicken sandwich. Someone's a hungry girl today!
"Cat," I call in a sing-song voice. She looks at me with a wide smile. "Yeah?" she asks in her high-pitched voice. "André told me to tell you that Robbie misses you." Cat starts laughing her little obnoxious laugh and picks up her drink. "He's so gross!" she exclaims as she grabs her straw and takes a sip. I chuckle at my darling little redhead.
~*You were my biggest mistake*~
Cat and I spent the rest of Wednesday in the mall at one of those little kiddie stores that have a bunch of games and stuff as well as the arcade. Cat played in the ball pit more than anything and won two giant stuffed giraffes and a blow up guitar when we went to the arcade. I played a racing game with her and a round of baby golf—after scaring away the other little children if I might add—and it was a fun, normal day.
Thursday I went back to school and avoided him all day. He tried to talk to me a few times, but I shrugged him off. When Cat told Vega about how I was going to the party with her, she tried to talk to me too. I let her talk, but I didn't talk back. Boys tried to talk to me now that I was single, but they were all losers so I scared them away. André talked to me a lot too, sitting close to me at lunch and in our classes, probably trying to make sure I was 'okay.' The older Vega came around too, and she was still unbearably annoying, so we all kicked her away from us, refusing to talk to her as always.
And now it's Friday.
I go to school like I normally would and I spend time with my friends and less-than acquaintances. We all talk like normal and we even discuss the party. To my pleasure, he isn't at lunch today because he's already left town. At least I get three days where I don't have to put up with him.
After school, I take Cat back to Vega's place and Robbie rides with Vega. I figure it'll be smart if the four of us only take one car to save the environment or whatever. Cat talks a lot about how close she and Robbie are starting to get and it slightly annoys me, but I'm honestly happy for her. I know how much she likes Robbie and if he likes her back then I hope they'll be happy together.
We all hang out at Vega's for a while as we wait and when we get ready to leave, I call shotgun so Cat and Robbie can have some time together in the backseat. Vega tries to start a conversation with me, but I don't respond to her. Casual conversation isn't my thing.
Twenty minutes later she pulls up to this huge mansion in a part of town I've never been before. It stands at least four stories high—I don't know for sure because it's so dark—and the grass is neatly cut with styled bushes all around the front lawn.
"Whose house is this?" I ask as Tori parks in front of a large line of cars that's already stretching down two blocks. Tori smiles softly. "It's my cousin's best friend's sister's house," she answers. "She invites me every year but I never wanted to go; none of my Sherwood friends would have wanted to come with me."
"So you actually had friends at your old school?" I ask mockingly. She sneers as we step out of the car. "You're so not funny Jade," she tells me. I scoff and walk with her, Cat, and Robbie to the front door. I hear footsteps behind us and I quickly turn around to see someone dash into the bushes. I roll my eyes and turn back around.
It's probably just Vega's stupid older sister who invited her stupid self to this stupid party.
Once we get inside, Vega breaks away from the three of us and Cat walks with Robbie away from me. I stand there with my arms crossed, examining the place.
The carpets are white and stream from door to door. There's a large staircase and that's painted white as well as the walls. Photos of blonde girls and raven haired girls each with big blue eyes hang on the walls, looking down on the people who are already here and partying with red cups full of booze in their hands. There are also a bunch of trophy cases filled with shiny trophies, knick-knacks, and precious china.
It would be a shame if those broke.
I scan the den full of partygoers on bright white couches and loveseats sipping beer and laughing loudly with whomever they sit by. There's a guy, probably in his twenties, sitting in a single chair by himself and holding a red cup. He's got shaggy blonde hair that's cut short atop big brown eyes full of excitement. His lips are pressed into a tight line as he stares at the innards of his cup.
He looks like a good potential one-night-stand.
Slowly, I make my way to him.
He lifts his head to me as I approach and a smile creeps across his face. "Hello, lovely," he greets. I stop walking and I feel my insides melt. His voice is smooth and warm and he's got a wonderful, subtle accent, like he's from England or something. It's hard to tell from only two words.
"Hey, yourself," I retort, taking a seat on the arm chair. "What's your name?" He chuckles slightly at me before answering. There's a certain cockiness in that chuckle and those eyes of his.
I don't like it.
"The name's Blake," he tells me sweetly. "What name does an angel like yourself have?" I fake a smile and fight another urge to roll my eyes. Someone's trying to be a sweet talker today isn't he?
"They call me Jade," I retort. "So what are you doing at a party like this?" He shrugs slightly and looks at the cup in his hand again. "I was invited by a friend," he begins, "So I thought I would find some people interested in being in a movie of mine." My eyes light up with curiosity. "A director, huh?" I question. "That's cool. What kind of movie are you making?"
He smiles softly at me. "A comedy," he answers. "I'm looking for a gorgeous woman to play the strong, independent, female lead." My fake smile drops into a sneer. "Comedies aren't my thing," I tell him. I move to get off the chair when Blake's arm shoots out to grab my wrist tightly.
I look back at him with dark eyes and he loosens his grip without letting go. He stands up, standing maybe 6 feet even to look down on me, and looks me in the eyes. "I'm sure I could re-write it to…better suit your…desires," he says with flirting eyes. I glare at him, not buying into his story. "Doubt it," I spit as I yank my arm from his grasp.
I walk away from him to another part of the house to get a drink.
Blake's not my one-night-stand.
~*You were my biggest mistake*~
I spend the next hour in the kitchen, talking with guys who look like they're in college. They all smile at me and I can see the lust in their eyes as I bend over the kitchen table, giving them a better shot at my cleavage. Not to be racist, but most of them were skinny white boys and definitely not my type. There a few black guys there that were muscly with corn rows and such, but I didn't like the way they acted. I didn't like the way any of the guys around me acted to be honest, but beggars can't be choosers.
Occasionally I look up from my crowd of doting pigs to see Blake standing around with another drink in his hand. Maybe it's the same one and he's just taking forever to drink it.
Maybe I don't care.
"This party's getting kinda lame," I announce with a playful smile to my group of horny followers. "Who's packing?" They all start chattering while they look at me, some claiming they're packing a good time for me in their pants while the others say they've got stuff at home. Pfft, like I'm really gonna go to one of these losers' houses.
"I've got something to liven the party," a voice calls out to me.
I've determined that his accept is Australian. Barely, but I've determined it.
I look to see the shaggy blonde, brown-eyed 'director' sauntering up to me now that he's got my attention. I grimace at him and I think about leaving my group of guys, but curiosity gets the better of me.
"State your business," I allow with a plastered, flirting smile.
Blake pushes two boys out of the way so that he's standing directly in front of me. He holds out a bag with a bunch of little white pills with red hearts on them. I raise my eyebrow in curiosity. "You have my interest," I tell him. "Talk."
"E, X, whatever alphabet letter you want to call it," he starts, "It's a happy pill. Take one and you'll have a hell of a party even when this one is over." I smirk at him. He might be cocky, but he's definitely got the right stuff. I hold my hand out to him. "Give," I demand.
He starts to hand me the bag but I quickly snatch it from him and dump at least ten in my hand. "Ah, ah, ah, Sugar," he halts. "One is all you need to be higher than a kite, lovely." I glare at him and pour nine of them back into the little baggy. I pop the last one into my mouth and toss the bag back at him. I dry swallow the pill and look back to Blake with a still raised eyebrow and a narrowed glance.
"Why don't you join me on the dance floor, Sugar?" Blake questions. I grimace at him. "Call me 'Sugar' one more time and I'll cut your nuts off," I threaten. He smirks. "Alright then, Jade," he starts as he holds his hand out to me. "Join me on the dance floor?" As much as I dislike this cocky prick, he does have a way with persuasion.
I take his hand, much to the dismay of my surrounders, and we make our way into the living room/den/whatever to have a dance. The music blares around us, but I finally start to realize that I don't care. I manage to find myself pressing my body against his as his hands grab me and we grind to the beat of whatever song's playing.
In the blink of an eye, Blake has me pinned to the wall and he's kissing my neck. Then there's a red cup in my hand and my lips are pressed to his as I'm clinging to his jacket. Cat comes up to me at one point in the night and asks me what I'm doing with him. We talk for a bit and I remember her crying.
I remember my body burning with the high of the ecstasy and I just wanted Blake right then and there. I remember telling him that and I remember him suggesting we get out of there. I remember Cat begging me not to go before I left, but I ignore her. I remember speeding away in his fancy sports car.
God…I remember ever touch…
When we get back to his house, Blake throws me against his wall—he doesn't even have the decency to take me to the bedroom!—and he starts ripping at my clothes. He bites my neck, scratches my arms with those greasy fingers of his, and he…God it's awful to say!
I-I remember screaming for him to get off me, but he wouldn't listen to me. I remember trying to push him away, to get him the hell off me, but he stayed. I wasn't a virgin before I met Blake, but I remember bleeding. I don't remember where I bled and I don't remember why. I remember the searing pain of it.
I remember wanting to die.
When it was over, God when it was over, I remember he threw me out of his house calling me a slut and a tramp among other things and he told me I should walk home and I could "use the exercise."
It wasn't until he slammed the door in my face that I remember crying…
I couldn't help it! Jade West doesn't fucking cry, but I cried. I was in pain and I felt dirty. The world was in a blur, and I felt dirty. I remember looking around trying to figure out where I was, but I couldn't figure it out.
I was in a place I never knew before…and I was dirty…
I remember walking, endless walking, trying to get back to where I was. I don't remember the dark trees or the dark streets that passed me by. I don't remember much of my walk and I didn't care.
I remember the pain of the cold air stinging me and burning wherever I was bleeding.
I remember winding up at someone's door that wasn't my own and I remember crying even more. I don't remember speaking though…
I remember waking up the next morning with André Harris lying beside me.