"You ready?"

Once again, he looked up, seeing John holding a small hammer. He was instantly confused. "Sure man, sure," He said smoothly.
It didn't take him long to realize John had been talking about finally unpacking and decorating the dorm. He peat boxed a little to pass the time as they worked, amused by the way john awkwardly danced, wiggling his skinny hips as he cleaned. Dave pulled out his phone when the brunette bent over, snapping a perfect picture of Johns ass bopping around. He smirked, pulling up pester chum and unblocking his brother.

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering timeausTestified [TT]

TG: Hey bro check out the view from my dorm
TG: /bestviewever
TT: Whoa ho ho, you weren't kidding, were you?
TT: That's quite a booty there.
TT: I'm almost jealous
TG: Nice huh?
TT: Most definatly.
TT: Seems you've changed your tune from the other night though, whats going on?
TG: I think you were right
TT: I usually am.
TT What are we talking about this time?
TG: Egbert
TG: I think I'm in love with him
TT: What made you come to that conclusion?
TG: ... I almost kissed him today
TT: Almost?
TG: Yeah he definatly wasnt feeling the same mojo i was in that moment
TG: I was seeing magic fairy dust and shit but he was just derpin around like John you know?
TT: Well maybe you should talk it out.
TT: If the ditz can't take a hint then just give it to him straight.
TG: You think he'll bite
TT: It's worth a shot.
TG: Maybe.
TG: We'll see I guess.

turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering timeausTestified [TT]

Dave's attempts to give it a shot were almost comical in their failures. He had tried to flirt a little, it had flown right over John's head. He took the kid out to expensive restaurants, then came home in the friend zone. He even tried something less subtle and taped an obnoxiously mushy SB&HJ comic to his glasses one morning. John just laughed and the next day, Dave woke up to a bed full of scary puppets. He shrieked with fright as the little prankster howled with laughter, and admittedly, the sound softened his humiliation a little. "Alright, alright, you've had your fun," He said, shoving his shades over his eyes and kicking on of the creepy plushes aside. "Now clean these shit fuckers up, they're giving me the creeps."
"But if I clean the dorm, that means you have to do the laundry!" John giggled. "Do you want a repeat of last time?"
Usually, housewife duties were left to John and the manual labor went to Dave. The one time they had switched, both Dave's favorite red silk boxers and all of Johns socks and ended up a muted pink. Dave gave the pile of puppets on his bed a weary look, feeling his eye twitch just a little. No way he was touching those plush rumps. "I'll take my chances."
Leaving John to handle the puppet buttock, Dave scooped up the laundry basket and started off towards the basement, where all the dorm residents did their washed their unmentionables. Honestly, if it had been anyone else, Dave would have refused to lift a finger until every plush was gone, and even then remain stubbornly useless for the remainder of the week, but it was John. Sweet, good humored, and obliviously cute John. He couldn't have gotten that angry with John, so he continued his decent towards the basement.
There were plenty of washers, dryers, and an abundance of fun, generic brand soap, so when Dave arrived and there was no one else around, he got right to work. For the sake of idiots like him, there were instructions taped up on the wall explaining how to work the machines, but they said nothing about how to use that knowledge correctly. Shrugging, Dave took and armful of clothes, shoved them in a washer and dumped in a heaping scoop of detergent, watching with amusement as everything swirled and swished behind the glass.
He stared, in a daze for a few solid seconds before he sighed, leaning impatiently against the wall. He didn't remember the cycle taking so long the last time, and absently wondered if he had fucked it up somehow. Exasperated, he hoisted himself up onto the wash, lying down across the row of machines, beat boxing out of boredom as they shook and hummed beneath him.
Right when he was about to give in and just switch everything to the dryer as is, a pretty looking red headed girl strolled on in with her own basket, swaying rhythmically to his beats. "Sounds like you're having fun up there," She said smoothly. "But you know, there are better places to jam than a laundry room."
"Clothes are taking forever," He said with a shrug. "Got bored."
The second he turned his head her eyes twinkled with excitement, a look he got form girls all to often. He had considered her lazily, bangs flopping over his shades as he awaited a response. He could tell she was hooked. One glance and she was done. "Well if you're bored," She began, stepping forward. "I know a little place where you can put those beats to good use. Tonight, actually."
Dave gave a small shrug. "I'll bite. What are we talking about, here?"
"A party, obviously," She said, flipping her hair. She was clearly trying to sway him with her looks. "Everyone on campus is invited."
"Sounds interesting," He yawned, swinging his legs off of the machine to stretch.
She batted her eyes, getting closer. "A guy like you could liven it up pretty quick."
Dave didn't move an inch.
"I'm Marissa," She added, smiling. "And I won't take no for an answer."
Just then the buzzer on Dave's machine sounded and he hopped down, switching everything to the dryer as he pondered the offer. She clearly wasn't going to stop flirting with him until he agreed, and he was stuck with her until the laundry was done, so he just gave in and told her he'd be there. She seemed nice enough though, so after gathering the clothes and dumping them back in the basket, he nodded in her direction, a glare flashing across his shades. "See you."
Leaving her to swoon and melt, Dave made his way back u[stairs to his dorm, walking in to find John in bed with a juice box, hunched over his laptop. His headphones were in, his big front teeth were sticking out and his bright blue eyes were glued to the screen. Sirens and gun shots blared through his shitty ear buds. The dorm was spotless of course, and Dave could see a sandwich and a bottle of apple juice waiting for him on the counter.
Grinning outright, Dave fetched the lunch and took a monstrous bite, washing it down with juice before lounging by John's side. He slung his arm around his roomies shoulders, making the kid jump. Laughing, he popped on of his ear buds out and flashed Dave a toothy smile. "Hope you sniffed that apple juice Dave."
The blonde paused mid sip. "Why?"
"Was it sealed?"
"Umm... No?"
"Then how do you know I didn't pee in it to fuck with you?"
Dave stared at the half empty bottle, then at John, and the two of them just burst out laughing, leaning on each other for support as they fell into hysterics. "John you cum guzzling bastard," Dave groaned, pushing the juice away. "Don't you ever handle my meals again!"
"Like you can cook!" John snorted. "Please, you'd be dead by dinner time!"
"Ad that, my dear beaver is where you are wrong."
"You can cook?"
Dave scoffed. "Hell no. But we do have plans for dinner."
His face brightened. "Cool, where are we going this time?"
The blonde smirked. "I'm taking you, my friend, to your very first collage party."
John nearly choked on his juice. "Um, what? Dave are you fucking crazy?"
"Yeah, why?"
"I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm a lanky, buck toothed dork. I'm not going to fit in with a bunch of cool kids at a party!"
Dave pulled Johns face close to his, forcing the little nerd to eye level. "John, you're a stud," He insisted. "A total babe, and you're the funniest guy I know. It'll be fun, trust me! Its just a party, I promise."
John was very hesitant. "Cross your heart?"
"And hope to die."