So far, I've gotta say, I'm liking how quickly this story is escalating. Speaking of escalating, one of the characters utters a few curse words in this story, some of them being very inappropriate. This will be the only time this fic strays into the M-territory. If you get offended, I'm sorry. So any-who… HERE IT IS!
The boat arrived at the dock. A sad Trent stepped onto the dock. Noah was sitting by the pool, reading his book, when he noticed a sad expression on Trent's face. "Whoa, what happened to you?" he asked.
"Heather happened," Trent replied. He told Noah, and everyone else at the resort except Eva because they were all hanging at the pool area, what happened. This made everyone hate Heather more.
"And you know what's the worst part?!" Trent griped. "The worst part is that I failed to make it to the final nine!"
Everyone gave him perplexed looks. "The final nine?" asked Beth, raising an eyebrow.
"Yes, the final nine," said Trent. "I promised the Ninth God that I would be the ninth person to be introduced by Chris on Total Drama Island. I promised the Ninth God that I would outlast nine other contestant. And I promised the Ninth God that I would make it to the final nine."
"Well, you did keep the first two promises," said Cody brightly. "But who is the Ninth God?" he asked.
Trent glared at Cody. "What are you, some kind of pagan or something?!" he demanded.
"No, I'm Catholic," said Cody.
"Catholicism is a pagan religion!" Trent snapped. "You'd better convert to the Number Nine Religion before you end up in the Place Devoid of the Number Nine!"
"Dude, nobody is a follower of your Number Nine… whatever this is," Noah assured Trent.
"Seriously, is it true that most of you guys are pagans?!" Trent demanded. Everyone awkwardly looked at one another and nodded. Trent sighed relentlessly nine times before he said: "You guys must have horrible parents for bringing you guys up as pagans! You guys should be followers of the Number Nine Religion if you want to go to Land of Nine Heavens!"
"Why would we want to go there?!" Courtney demanded.
"Because if you don't go to the Land of Nine Heavens, you'll end up in the Place Devoid of the Number Nine!" Trent screamed.
"And your point is?" said Courtney, folding her arms.
"MY POINT IS THAT THERE IS NO NINE IN THE PLACE DEVOID OF THE NUMBER NINE!" roared Trent. "The number, Nine, would not exist if it weren't for the Ninth God! Therefore, without the Ninth God, ten would come after eight, twenty would come after eighteen, and thirty would come after twenty-eight and so on! There would be thirteen hours in an analogue clock but twenty-five hours in a total day, and twenty-five cannot be divided into two by any whole number, not even thirteen! And worst of all, ten would be my lucky number instead of nine, AND I HATE TEN!"
"Okay, I'm just going to assume that the eight gods that preceded the Ninth God are just unimportant figureheads named after the planets of our solar system, is that correct?" Noah deadpanned.
"Yes," Trent, "the gods are Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune and the Ninth God!"
"Okay, why do I suddenly care why Pluto lost its status as a planet back in 2006?" Noah deadpanned.
Trent smiled proudly. "Well, now there's a potential second prophet for the Number Nine Religion!" he beamed, beckoning to Noah before everyone else, all of whom were confused to no end. But Noah just rolled his eyes.
"No thanks," he spat, "I'm happy enough as a Muslim, thank you very much."
"A WHAT?!" shrieked Trent. "Noah, I will refuse to recognise Islam as a proper religion until it adds four more pillars!"
"You refuse to recognise Christianity, yet there are nine letters in the word 'Christian'," Noah shot back. "In fact, if you love nine so much, how come the handprint on your shirt has only five digits?"
"Because our hands only have four digits!" Trent snarled. "And it's all the writers' fault for being blasphemous heretics!"
"Okay, I'm done here," groaned Noah, closing his book shut and heading towards the hotel.
"Hey, get back here!" Trent ordered. "Nobody's leaving until I'm done preaching the word of the Ninth God!" Sadly, everyone has left the pool area. Trent sighed nine times and went off to find his room. Actually, Trent went in to Room 9, because he wanted that room, no matter what. He begged the staff nine times to put all of the personal belongings in Room 9 into Room 10, the room which Trent was assigned. Only because the staff were sick and tired of Trent being a nuisance and the fact that Room 9 was Eva's room did the staff finally gave in and gave Trent Room 9. After all, Eva wasn't using it because ever since Eva returned to Playa des Losers she's been busy taking anger management classes. As you can see, Eva was not allowed to finish until the shrinks saw signs of improvement, so now wonder Room 9 was unused.
Bridgette showed up. Like Trent, she wasn't happy about her elimination, mostly because Geoff ran off at the last second before he was about to kiss her (although she couldn't blame him for that). Plus, the guys voted her out for the sake of an alliance, and she had a feeling Heather and Lindsay were involved for strategic reasons. She really hated Duncan. She really hoped Courtney broke up with him.
Speaking of which, there was Courtney, still looking for Harold. Courtney stopped what she was doing and waved at Bridgette.
"Hey Bridgette!" she called out. Bridgette smiled and waved back.
"Hey Courtney!" she replied.
"Why were you eliminated? You had so much potential."
"The teams dissolved the day after Harold was eliminated," said Bridgette. "The girls started to outnumber the guys, so the guys formed an alliance and I was their first target. I assume Heather and Lindsay voted with them, because even if Geoff did vote me out, it would still be impossible for them to eliminate me."
"I'm sure it was just strategy, but then again, if that was me, I'd rip their heads off," said Courtney. "I have to tell you something: I was unfairly voted out because Harold tampered with the votes."
"I guess that explains how you were voted out despite Duncan's alliance with Geoff and DJ," said Bridgette. "So have you talked this through with him?"
"Not yet. He's still hiding from me."
"I'll be happy to arrange for you two to meet up and settle your differences if you want."
"No thanks, I'm good," said Courtney. She decided to hang out with Bridgette. She needed a break from Harold. But little did Bridgette realise was that Courtney wanted to kill him. She wasn't finished with him.
Lindsay arrived at the Playa. Unlike her predecessors, Lindsay looked happy and relaxed about her elimination.
"What are you so happy about?" Katie wondered.
"Heather may have betrayed me, but I finally stood up to her afterwards," beamed Lindsay. "I called her a fucking ass-hat bitch-c*** of a whore, and everyone else cheered me on!"
"OMG, you are so awesome!" Sadie squealed.
"Like, TOTALLY awesome!" Katie squealed.
"I know, right?!" Lindsay squealed.
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Katie, Sadie and Lindsay squealed in unison.
"Lindsay?" a certain, familiar voice called out. Lindsay turned towards the direction of where the voice came from.
"Tyler?" Lindsay replied. She gasped and shrieked in delight. "TYLER!" she shrieked, running up to Tyler, as Tyler ran up to her. They endured a long embrace as Tyler swung his girlfriend around. They had a French kiss, which prompted all the girls – even Eva and Courtney – to 'aw', and all the guys – even Noah – to whoop.
After the hugging and kissing, Lindsay paused and asked, "Wait, which one of you is Tyler again?" This prompted everyone on the island – especially Eva, Courtney and Noah – to face-palm.
DJ was the next to arrive. Like Lindsay, the brick-house was rather content with his elimination. He looked over at all of his former competitors. They were all lounging in the pool area. Courtney and Bridgette were receiving massages from masseuses. Eva was having a row with Trent because Trent stole her nine dumbbells; the only reason Trent did that was if there were nine of anything they were Trent's for the taking. Beth and Justin were tanning with the sharks. Cody was watching some porn on a laptop. Katie and Sadie were in the hot-tub, squealing non-stop. Ezekiel was standing beside Noah, rapping, much to Noah's chagrin.
"B,
"To the A,
"To the S,
"To the T,
"To the A,
"To the R,
"To the D! Word! Eh!"
Noah looked up from his book and turned to face Ezekiel. "Excuse me Zeke, I know you think you're a great rapper, but the sad reality is: you're not. A rap is a ballad, sung by people who have emerged from childhoods that were far more difficult than average, or by people who have emerged form really pleasant experiences. You, on the other hand, came from a childhood that was neither pleasant nor unpleasant, in other words, dull and boring. Rapping does not automatically make you a gangster, and a gangster is someone who sells drugs, not someone who take drugs. And they certainly don't go around acting all cool and ghetto. So please find something to do that you're good at." But Ezekiel just smiled and said:
"Sweet, eh! Yoo were bein' oonplesant to me, eh! Noo I've gotta anova reason too be a rappa, eh!" He walked off, leaving Noah to regret giving the prairie kid that lecture. Just as Noah went back to reading his book, Harold popped his head out of the bushes and asked:
"Did you know that the word 'bastard' is the old English term for an illegitimate child?"
"Regardless of whether you're legitimate or not, you're still going to be referred to as a bastard by your peers," Noah quipped.
"Did you know that the ice cream you see in commercials are actually potatoes covered in sauce?" Harold gabbed.
"Oh, so that's why ice cream looks so much better in person," Noah quipped, still not looking up from his book.
"Did you know that the more a local radio station plays country music, the higher the local area's suicide rate climbs?" Harold gabbed.
"Did you know that the more Noah listens to Harold, the greater the number of chances of Noah going insane?" Noah quipped.
"Did you know that-"
"Look Harold," Noah interjected, turning his head to face Harold, scowling, "I'm not interested in listening to your 'enlightening' facts anymore. Now piss off before I call Courtney over." That was enough to have Harold scramble back into the bushes.
Tyler and Lindsay were making out on one of the loungers. Lindsay paused and said: "Wait, are you Tyler?" She shrugged and went back to kissing Tyler.
Everyone stopped what they were doing and said in unison: "HEY DJ!" They all went up to hug him, even Harold.
"Aw, you guys really missed me!" DJ beamed.
"Of course we would!" Sadie beamed.
"You're so nice!" Beth added.
Sadly, this sentimental moment was cut short when Courtney and Eva realised that Harold and Trent were also participating in the group hug.
"THERE YOU ARE, YOU LITTLE TRAITOR!" Courtney shrieked, chasing after Harold. Before Eva decided to continue giving out to Trent, she turned to Bridgette, who was trying to sneak away, and said:
"Hey surfer girl, c'mere, I want to talk to ya." Bridgette nervously walked up to the fitness buff. To her surprise, Eva held out her hand.
"Sorry," said Eva. "I'm sorry for jumping to conclusions and making your life a living Hell."
Bridgette took Eva's hand in hers and shook it. "It's okay. Sorry for voting you out before the dodge-ball challenge," she replied.
"Yeah, I can see why you guys did it, but just pray that Heather doesn't come here. I most go apologise to everyone else for looking them up in the attic and get my weights back from Trent," said Eva, leaving a confused Bridgette to figure out what she meant about praying that Heather won't show up at Playa des Losers. Suddenly, it occurred to the surfer chick that Heather stole Eva's MP3-player. This gave Bridgette another reason to hate Heather, and she could not wait to tell everyone the news.
"AIEEEEEE-EEEEEEE-EEEEE!" shrieked Izzy as she swung from a vine that was hanging from an unknown source and landing into the pool, causing a splash that soaked Noah, Tyler, Cody and Ezekiel.
"Why don't you get our clothes wet?" Noah deadpanned.
"Okay!" Izzy chirped, dragging the boys into the pool with her. Izzy jumped out of the pool and saw that Trent and Eva were still having a row over Eva's dumbbells. Izzy cartwheeled over to them, jumped up a few metres into the air and landed on Eva's shoulders.
"So whatcha guys fightin' over?!" Izzy chirped. "Did you confess that you have feelings for Gwen too, Eva?!"
"I'LL KILL YOU, SCARY GIRL!" Eva roared, as Izzy jumped off of the fitness buff's shoulders and ran into the hotel, cackling, as Eva chased her. Trent smiled because he finally has the chance to have sex with Eva's nine dumbbells.
By the time Geoff arrived at Playa des Losers, everyone was already furious with Heather. Bridgette was the first to great Geoff. Geoff ran up to her, scooped her up in his arms and kissed her on the lips.
"Oh, Bridgette, I'm so sorry for bailing on you at the last second before kissing you!" he apologised.
"It's okay, Geoff!" she replied. "Now we have a chance to be together!"
"I love you Bridgey-bear!"
"I love you too, Geoffy-poo!"
Everyone witnessing this whooped and cheered. Only Harold, Eva and Izzy were not witnessing this poignant reunion. Harold, who has narrowly managed to escape Courtney's wrath, was still in hiding. Izzy lured Eva into the attic the night before, where she was shifting Eva.
That was a very long chapter to write. The longest chapter I have written so far. At least we got to see Trent's number nine obsession. Finally, Eva has calmed down… until the next chapter! By the time Heather shows up… it won't be pleasant, heh-heh. Anyway, next chapter will be the final chapter for season one. After that, it's second season, and the most controversial season of the series.
Next week I'll probably be at work, so updates will be less common. I'll still try to update Total Drama: Island Renewed, My Big Fat Creepy Roommate and Rise of the Planet of the Nine, though.
Until next time!