Author's Notes

*sings* I think this chapter's mostly filler… Ahem. So, looking at this chapter, I think it's kind of funny. You can definitely tell where the shift is, when I stopped writing whatever randomly came to mind, and I actually found some direction. The opening lyrics didn't give me too much to work with, and this story doesn't really hit its stride until the next song, so I'm mostly just trying to set characters and relationships up until I can get there. I promise, wading through all of this will be worth it. But that's also why this chapter's a bit shorter.

Warnings: Lost and Delirious reference, Fable reference

Octahedron

Chapter Two: Teflon (Part 1)

By Persephone's Nautical Nun

Just don't know the laymen's terms
To call the mess you bleed.
Crawls beneath the surface;
Sought blood through a family tree.

The date's been changed
With each new phase.
I'm anxious bouts of nervous.

What am I without the bruises?
These switches won't come on.
What do I do to lose it,
Beneath this distress call?

Let the wheels burn, let the wheels burn;
Stack the tires to the neck, with a body inside.

Dear Katie

Life here just got a lot more complicated. I already didn't feel peaceful, but now everything's riled up.

No. Fuck that.

Dear Katie

Naomi's found me. The one person I didn't want to find me found me, and now I don't know what to do.

Too lost. Too angsty. Don't worry so much.

Dear Katie

Thank you so much for sending Naomi my way, you meddling bitch. And I know you did it, so stop looking shocked. Cleaning this one up is going to be interesting. Give my best to Jim Jam.

Emsy

Third time's the charm. She'll catch the joke, and she'll know I got her present. That's enough.

I have to go see Bryan. He'll make it all better. Always does. Wonder if he's working today. Guess I might as well check.

Can't relax. Can't just walk. This isn't my city, anymore. She's here, somewhere, lurking around every corner. I'm no longer safe in the anonymity. She did say I'd see her again.

Wonder when that'll be. Doesn't seem as pr-active as she once was.

Just calm down. Nothing you can do now, deal with it when it comes.

Don't laugh. Don't laugh. Oh, it's fucking hilarious, but don't laugh. Bryan selling shoes, and being good at it. Never fails to crack me up. Can tell he sees me, but he's got a customer.

I'll just go play with the baby shoes for a while.

Hmm. Why would an infant need pumps? Society's getting weirder and weirder.

Whoa. Surprise hug. Okay. "You looked like you needed a hug." Good old, Bryan. Maybe he'll be the one to not take Naomi's side. "I can take a break in a few minutes. Meet me around back."

Lean against the brick wall. Know I look like a fucking stereotype, but fuck if I care. Door bangs open; out pops Bryan, cigarette already dangling from his lip. Offers me one. Accept it. "I heard about Naomi. How you holding up?"

Shrug. What is there to say? Everything. Nothing. It doesn't matter. Let's not talk about it. "How come you never come out with us, anymore, Bryan?"

He shrugs, too. We're shruggy people. "It's not really the same, is it?"

"So? I was out with both Shane and AJ a few nights ago. Just because we've all separated doesn't mean we can't still make time for each other, does it?"

"I don't know, Ems. I think it might mean just that." Deep inhale. Heavy stare. There's something behind his words. "Think about it."

Don't have to. Not really. It's the whole reason I came here. Separated myself, don't want to make time for her.

Knew he'd understand.

But the situation with him is entirely different. Don't really have time to get into it with him, though. Break's almost over.

"We should hang out, sometime."

Oh, Bryan. I wonder if you know how contradictory you can sometimes be.

Bored, bored, bored. Gotta find something to do with my days. May even find a real job. Don't want to go back to the loft. Just as boring, there. City this size should not be this boring. What did I do before?

Oh, yeah. Planned parties and fucked around with Naomi.

That's what I need, a good old fashioned party. Or some acid. Everything's so far away on acid. I bet Shane could find some. Seems to be able to sniff the shit out.

Already feel better. Got a plan, and things to do, and none of it involves Naomi. Finding a place to trip is going to be the hard part. Make a deal out of it, or keep it small. Decisions, decisions. Should consult with Jazz and Jess. Jessica'd be able to find a place for sure.

Suppose whether or not we can find a large quantity for a good deal determines if we try to throw a big party, and the size determines the location, and the location determines decoration and entertainment. Nothing for it, I've got to talk to Shane first.

Let's see, where would he be? Probably on one of his streets. Good a place as any to start.

Except that when I find him, he's laughing with Naomi, like they're old friends. How did she even find him? I know he hasn't seen her before. "Are you fucking serious?" Fairly certain everyone knows how I'm going to feel about this. No point beating around the bush.

"Hello, Emily." Far cry from your attitude last night. Does the daylight help you somehow? Afraid you're going to have to do better than that, though. Your delivery was far too chipper to be believable.

Not playing this game. Can't make me. "Yeah, hi, what are you doing here?"

Your shrug's too nonchalant. Do you really think this is going to work? Try something else. "Catching up with Shane." Not technically a lie, since you didn't know I'd be seeing him today, but I know that's not all. Just because you didn't know you'd see me doesn't mean you didn't hope.

"Well, I was hoping to talk to my friend, but I guess it can wait. I'll leave you to it." Not sticking around for a back and forth. Can't stop her from showing up, but I don't have to stay.

"No, that's okay. I need to get going, anyway." Where in the world could you possibly have to be? "Picked up another shift at the diner." You're working? Interesting, though you shouldn't be waiting tables. Why are you stopping? Why are you so close to me? Why does it still feel like I'm trying to jump out of my skin? "You know, Emily, he is my friend, too, just like Bryan and AJ." AJ. Right. Do you fuck all your friends up against trees? "And that's okay."

No, it's not. It's my fault, though. Gone before I can open my mouth. Did she just win that one? Fitch 1, Campbell 1. God no, not that warm sensation in the pit of my stomach.

Thought I'd worked through this.

Only let it go down so far, that's it. Push it down and feel it mellow. Nothing's big or important but you. There's no more pain to be felt. Only so far down…

Found yourself.

Hadn't paid much attention to Shane until now. Can't read him. Usually can. Few steps towards him. "Look, she hasn't done anything to me, and we're friends. So don't –" Okay, so not the usual greeting, then.

Oh, Shane.

Wave him off, stop him talking. Nowhere near the point. "It's okay, Shane. But just because you want to hang out with her doesn't mean I have to."

Nod. Shrug. "Fair enough." Silence. "Hi, Emily, good to see you." Smile and a hug. That's more like it. "What brings you to my stand of wonders, today?"

Step closer to him, and lower your voice. Don't look suspicious, and can't be heard by passersby. "Please, please tell me you've heard tell of some LSD trickling around recently."

He's quiet, thinking, checking memory banks. Squints and licks his lips. Probably means it's a long shot. But long shots have worked before. "Let me talk to a couple people, and I'll get back to you."

Good enough for me. Good enough for now. "Thanks, man."

"What do you got in mind?"

Shrug. "Depends on how much you can find." Wait a minute. This could be it; the key to ending this here and now. Seems I've got the beginning of a plan floating around up there. "You know what? Better keep it moderate. You know, handful of close friends." Think that actually just made it easier for him.

Nothing like the feeling of action; of plans set in motion.

Strange safe feeling as I head towards the rehearsal space. Not sure what to make of it. Not really complaining.

First one here. Where is that key? Too many damn pockets. There. Something strangely satisfying about the click of a padlock. Slide open the big metal door, hear it ring around you.

I like this place.

Flick the mic amp on, stand before the stand, feet planted. Warm up, let's see. "Lost Carol." Soul, Ems, soul. Let yourself feel it. Go into something else; improve. Play with your voice, see what it can do. This is what it's like when I sing from my chest. Light, airy, agile. It's nice. It's weak. Can do so much more.

Slow it down, darken it up. Shift your center from your chest to your belly. Pull it up from deep within you. Full, strong, fill the room with sound. Nothing but my voice to fill it with. Close your eyes; move as your own voice carries you.

Don't notice Jess come in. Quick start when her guitar joins you. Recover, and alter just enough to play off what she's doing. Stay full, stay clear, but rise upwards. Physical rise with the melody, now swell. Jess shift, less cool, more drive. Shift with her, that's right.

There's Jazz in the doorway. Can tell we're being studied. Think she likes it, though; there goes the head. Not long before she's strapped her bass up and joins us. Brings a different tone to the mix; a different quality. Keeps us raw, bare somehow, and though we've added an instrument, it feels like we've been stripped down.

Ange shows up right on time, watches us. Smile, you're having a blast. Hook your finger towards her, sway to your own music. Join us, Ange, come on. You know you want to. Apathetic shrug and she's behind her set. Yes. Drive us forth on this musical adventure; unite us. This is why I do this. It's perfect, and we've reached a state of mind we all share.

That is until we fall out of sync and the whole thing crumbles. Was fun while it lasted, though.

"That was great guys, but we should get to work." Figures that would be the first thing out of Jazz's mouth. Jess makes a face, but none of us really mind. The work Jazz puts us through always shows.

Though it's going to be especially rough until we've got our next gig locked in. Always knowing when her next pay check's coming tends to keep her mellow.

Catch Jess as she's putting her guitar away. "Meeting AJ again?" Sometimes get the feeling they only hang out with each other.

"Of course. You want to come?" Jessica's your average friendly, chipper girl, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. Not sure a person exists that she can't get along with.

Follow her out and down the street, find AJ behind the wheel of her car in a parking lot under a bridge. "Emily! Will you be joining us in our travels this fair evening?"

Should not be this easy to catch his mood. Probably one of the reasons I could never be mad at him. Didn't mean anything by it. Not really. "Why, yes, I will be, and what will we be doing on this night?"

"We figured we'd head out to Oakvale, and partake in their green harvest." Goober. Slide into the car behind Jessica. Think that was AJ for going on a space cruise.

It was. Out in the middle of nowhere, and I can actually see the stars. Almost forgot what they looked like. Can see the panel's glow reflecting off all the smoke in the car. Fuck, I'm high. "Oh, yeah, hey Jess, I wanted to talk to you about something."

"What's up?"

"If I were to acquire some acid, do you know where we could trip?"

"Uh-oh. Someone's bored." That's right, AJ. Know me too well. "How big we talking?"

Shake head, hit the blunt. "Not big at all." Exhale. "I'm thinking just us, you know?" He knows. He knows I mean more than just the people in this car.

Think he needs to clarify, anyway. "Naomi?"

Don't catch his eye. Focus on Jess as you pass the blunt. "Sure, why not?" Shrug, nonchalant. Don't give an inkling about your ulterior motives. None of his business.

"Yeah, we could just use my place." Jess has completely missed the interrogation, and now the moment's past.

"You sure it's big enough?"

"Oh, yeah. We'll have room to explore."

"You know, Emily, you're handling the Naomi situation pretty well. I'm proud of you." Learn when to stop, AJ. I see the accusation behind your eyes, and you of all people should know to stay out of it.

"Well, I do what I can." Feign cheerfulness. Lean back in the seat, breathe in the smoke laced air, nice and slow. Stare out the windows and try to see something, anything, within the blackness.

Shouldn't come as a surprise to find nothing there.