There's a silent standoff in the car. Robin knows she's mad, and she is well aware he's not too happy at her at the moment either, but each are stubbornly committed to staying silent. That is, until Robin makes a turn off the turnpike.
"This is not the right way home."
"I thought we'd spend the night up here. I found this place – you said Jersey isn't entirely paved and it's by a national park, I thought it would be nice to see it, there's a jacuzzi"
Regina rolled her eyes "I can't step foot in a Jacuzzi for quite sometime, I'm pregnant." She gritted her teeth. "I want to get home. Now." Regina was curt, cold, angry. But resolved to not start this fight. No, she'll let Robin initiate things.
With a deep sigh, Robin yet again concedes defeat on their little game – why he thought she'd be the first to say what is bothering her is beyond him.
"You're upset."
"Yes, you're very intuitive. Turn around and take me home." She looked out the window , her body curled against the passenger's side door, as far as she could let from Robin. She hated him right now. Except she didn't. She hated herself. She didn't want to tell him about her money problems post-Graham. It was embarrassing and beneath her. She had been holding her breath, hoping it didn't come up this weekend, hoping her mother didn't put two and two together and realize she couldn't afford her place on her salary. But that wasn't very smart, was it? And now Robin had said they were going to live together. Proclaimed it without really asking her first. Trapping her. They weren't in a real relationship and this was just going to further complicate everything, completely blur the lines between them during a time when they should be clarifying their relationship as two parents living separate lives, not a couple.
Robin took a deep breath in. "As much fun as the next 5 hours sound in the car with you right now, I'm not much in the mood to drive back to DC."
Regina rolled her eyes and took out her phone. "Fine. Stop at the next rest stop. I'll get my own ride."
Robin snorted. "Who is going to drive you from here all the way home on a moment's notice? Come on Regina-"
"Emma will do it" Regina snapped, and oh, that's right. Emma would drive up to pick her up 5 hours away and turn around back for Regina. Robin both loved and hated Emma for it.
He had 7 miles til the next rest stop to convince her to stay with him and talk this out.
"Why didn't you tell me money was tight?" He finally asked, "What was I supposed to do when that came up, Regina? You planned for everything. You planned for your mother asking about my dual citizenship! We went over what to say if she asked about our holiday plans post-child, for god's sake. But this? You didn't clue me in to what to do if this ever came up."
"Yes, which meant you should have just shut up and let me handle it! And stop getting yourself involved and us getting ourselves into an even bigger mess." She said staring out the window. She had been paying for an apartment herself, an apartment she used to split with Graham. Of course things were tight, but she was surviving. And she was going to figure a way out of it, if everyone would just give her a damn minute.
Robin focused his eyes on the road, his heart was pounding. There were two directions to go in response to Regina now. He could blow up at her – this was afterall, her doing. She was the one who wanted him to play boyfriend with her, she was the one who kept this from him, and he drove all the way up to her parent's house to introduce himself and put on this farce for her, and now the one mistake he made - which, less face it, was less of a mistake and more of a nice gesture that saved Regina from caving to her horrible mother.
He wanted very much to scream at her right now, to let his temper take over, complain about how she was treating him after he woke up at the crack of dawn to put on a god damn charade for her in front of her parents. But he knew she felt guilty about that already, and she was still very much pregnant. He wasn't going to upset her any more.
"Why did you want me here when you told your parents about the baby?"
"Honestly I can't remember why anymore" Regina muttered, staring out the passenger window.
"I think it's because you didn't want them to push you into a decision you didn't want to make."
"They weren't going to convince me to have an abortion" she groaned.
"That's not what I mean. You didn't want our mother using the child to gain more control of your life, right? Everything we planned for – every scenario you brought up – it was all about trying to get your mother to stop trying to micromanage this situation."
"What's your point?" Regina shifted a bit in her seat, uncomfortable. Robin shifted his eyes off the road for a second to find her gaze had dropped from out the window to her lap, and she was playing with her hands a bit. He knew her well enough to know she was all but acknowledging he was right.
"I felt like you were caving to the idea of moving to New Jersey. That's why I said something."
Regina snapped her head up, and replied icily "Well, I wasn't. I'm not as weak as you apparently think."
"It's not weakness, Regina. Your mother is a master manipulator. You've told me the stories. If she can manipulate leaders of congress it doesn't seem like much of a stretch that she can manipulate her own daughter."
"I wasn't going to move away. I just needed a minute to think of a plan – just a minute – and you jumped in and came up with the worse possible solution!"
It stung, being told living with him was the worst possible solution. Cut more than he thought it would, knocking the breath out of him and leaving him speechless temporarily.
"Plus" she added, after a few minutes of silence. "I don't appreciate being handed charity from my best friend."
Being called her best friend both healed and hurt, at least it was something, but yet, not enough.
"If I couldn't make my mortgage, would you offer me a place to stay?"
"Of course, but it's not the same -"
"And would you feel like you were doing some sort of charity?" he asked, quickly, trying to hide his rising temper.
"No." She responded quietly. "But you didn't offer your place because you wanted to live with me. you did it because you thought you had to, but you don't. I'm not your obligation."
"For fucks sake Regina, sometimes I feel like you don't know the first thing about me." he growled. The idea that he didn't want her there and offered out of an obligation?
"What I'm saying is that if you were losing your house you'd have a hundred options of who to live with, and none of those roommates would have to change much at all, because it's not like you're pregnant or come with a child attached to you. But unless you're stupid, you know that by offering to move me in, you're basically offering to change your whole lifestyle."
"What lifestyle is that?" Robin asked, gritting his teeth "Give me a heads up, on a scale of 1-10, how offended am I going to be?"
Regina sighed, ignoring his sarcasm. "I need a roommate who doesn't like hosting parties that go until all hours of the night, because I'm tired and find I need more sleep lately. Moving twice while I'm pregnant is going to be tough, so if I move in with you I might still be there when the baby gets here. And that means we'll have to baby proof your townhouse, which, frankly, is pretty much a bachelor's pad and I don't think baby gates will go with your particular design. You'll have to deal with hearing a screaming infant at all hours of the day and night. And I won't" Her voice changes a little, sounds weaker, more hurt. "…I'm not going to be able to deal with the late night female visitors you have over once the baby is here, I don't want strangers in the house with the baby while I'm doing things such as breastfeeding….so…it'll change your nights out with the guys, or you'll end up having to indulge in some hotels, and this is a lot for you."
"Alright. You outdid yourself. Insulted me more than I thought possible. Congratulations. You know after ten years I'd think you'd know me just a little but maybe you are just that self centered that -"
"Yes I'm a terrible person, and you just fucking volunteered to move in with me, real fucking smart. This is why this was a bad idea." The rest stop was ahead, he pulled into it. Regina took out her cell phone again, when she put the phone to her ears, he knew she had called Emma.
"Don't tell her to come and get you yet." Robin said while parking, his eyes pleading. "Let's go in and have a coffee and maybe you get yourself something to eat since you threw up your brunch."
He could hear the ringing from Regina's phone. She ignored him for a second, but Emma didn't answer. She sighed and ended the call.
"Even if I call her now we have plenty of time to talk before she gets here" Regina reminded him. "Why did you stop here if you didn't want to drop me off?"
Robin's fists are clenched, and he's so, so angry at her he thinks he might say something to drive her away for good. What did he have to do to convince her he was ready to be a father? She was acting like he'd continue to be the man riding out his twenties with the usual Thursday night bar scenes, the meaningless women he would see (that he hadn't even missed since the first time he took Regina to bed, and he doubt he'd ever miss again), the ridiculous immature parties. Everything changed the second he realized he was going to be a father. He thought that should be obvious.
"Look, I really need to talk to you, and I can't it while I'm driving, I'm getting too upset. Just come in with me for coffee, or something. Please?"
She nods, her eyes still looking away from him. She hasn't looked him in the eye since they left her parent's house, and he wonders if she's afraid she'll get too angry if she looks directly at him, or if possibly, she's worried she'll stop being angry if she looks at him. Regina's emotions are still very much a mystery to him.
When she first steps out of the car looking battered, Robin realizes how exhausted she must feel. Some of his anger dissipates as he realizes she appears just as upset and hurt as he is.
But then she's not paying attention and nearly walks into the path of a car driving by. It's a quick thing – Robin doesn't even think about it when he grabs her arm and pulls her back to him, for a second losing his breath at the thought of her being hurt. She's muttering something under her breath he knows must be along the lines of "I was fine", but suddenly, he doesn't care how fine she thinks she was, and he doesn't care that they are in the parking lot of a very crowded rest stop, and he doesn't care that she is quite possibly, still irrationally angry at him.
He pulls her closer, into a hug, tightening it when she goes stiff, thanking the universe that she isn't trying to push him away, because he won't force affection on her, but he doesn't think he could break away from her right now. In what seems like forever she drops her head to his shoulder, and another eternity before she wraps her arms around him, hugging him back.
"I'm sorry" he says. He truly is sorry because he's upset her, though he has no idea what he's done to make her this upset. What he does know is he doesn't like it when she's this cold to him, and he'd do anything to prevent her from treating him as if he were nothing to her. It's an empty feeling, and a terrifying one.
"No, I'm sorry. " she says softly.
"Regina…" he pulls back from the hug enough to meet her eyes, "I know exactly what I signed up for—"
"Let's go inside" Regina cuts off, and he realizes her skin is a bit flushed, can't figure out whether it's the unseasonably warm day or the fact that they are having a very emotional conversation in front of a very busy parking lot.
The rest stop smells like fried chicken and cinnamon rolls and air freshener all mixed as one, and Robin is suddenly worried for Regina, who's been sensitive to smells lately.
But she handles it like a champ, walks over to order a slice of pizza, which seems like a safe choice for Robin as well. They grab a booth near a corner, thankfully out of the way from the crowds and the noise of rest stop. God knows where all these people were going.
Regina looks down at her food, picks at it a bit, taking deep sips of her diet sprite instead. She won't meet his eyes. Robin grabs her hand, laces his fingers around her.
"The first thing I need you to know," he starts "The thing that I thought you already knew awhile ago – is that I'm done being the guy who picks up random women."
Robin knew of his reputation with women, he had been lightly teased about it. He had his share of women before, but he became known for picking girls up from bars after Marian broke his heart. Regina had witnessed him leave their group of friends on various nights for a new, just-out-of-college girl, attracted to him because he was subtle with flirting, very nice, approachable – easier than the your typical single guy trying to get laid. He always seemed like the type of guy who wouldn't normally go for a one-night stand, and that alone is why he ended up getting so many. It had become a joke amongst his friends, and he knew it had – who would Robin try to seduce tonight, and would he be successful?
There was something exciting and thrilling about it at first, but it had now become boring. The sex was always a let down from what he hoped it would be, and the last few times the evening ended with him regretting quite a bit.
She lets out a small laugh, and he groans. "I was done with it before I knew I was going to be a father."
That is when she turns to look at him, skeptically, with a doubtful small smile on her face.
"Truly, Regina, I was already getting bored before you and I…first ended up getting together but that sealed the deal. Have you seen me even try to pick someone up since we first slept together?"
Regina rolled her eyes. "I expected you to not continue that in front of me, given our circumstances."
"You can ask anyone, it's not interesting to me anymore. It stops being fun and exciting and new, and without those feelings, most of the time it's actually quite awful."
She laughs, "yes, sleeping with beautiful strangers uncommitted sounds horrible.'
He laughed back. "They weren't all beautiful, and if you really thought it was so wonderful, you'd be doing it yourself every night."
"It's different for women." Regina reminded him, but her voice was softening.
Robin squeezed her hand. "I'm not saying we were in a relationship, but I'm saying I didn't sleep with anyone else after I was with you because it was far better with you. I had already decided I was ready to try a relationship again. I only ever stopped because I had my heart crushed, and you know that."
"I do. I've been there, I just didn't really…sleep around much when I was getting over a broken heart."
"Well, you just slept with me."
She rolled her eyes. "Graham didn't break my heart. My father already said it - I didn't have a strong emotional connection to Graham. I loved our life together though. It was…comfortable." Regina drew her face into a little scowl, searching for words. "When he left me, I was deeply insulted, and embarrassed and surprised. We were together for six years. I really didn't know he cared that strongly about anything, didn't even know how much he wanted a child. We had a good relationship, we rarely fought, we didn't need to be together all the time, it wasn't that exhausting all-encompassing type of love that I had with…" she doesn't like to even say his name out loud, saying it brings back a flood of memories. "Daniel."
Robin nodded. The subject of Daniel always brought a reverent, somber mood. He didn't really know her well when Daniel's death was fresh, a sudden car accident, but he knew she hadn't handled it well, knew it contributed to the person she was today, though he'd never know the person she was before Daniel, so he'd never know the difference.
"I don't want that type of relationship again." She says softly, painfully. "I'm not making one person my everything again."
And suddenly, she was making a bit more sense to Robin. Why she fought meaningful relationships, why she was sometimes so distant with him. She was fighting him - fighting them. Didn't want Robin to become as important as Daniel. She wasn't truly emotionally stunted. She was just scared.
Now wasn't the time to convince her to get over her fears. So he shifted the conversation.
"The child is going to be your everything" he says softly, "I know you, you won't be able to help it."
"I know" she looked down again at her now-cold pizza. "But that's different. Children don't want you to rely on them, they just need you to love them and take care of them and they don't need to give anything in return. I don't need to worry about becoming too dependent on a child."
"Living with me won't destroy your independence, Regina." There's no answer from her, and oh, that's the problem.
She's silent for a moment and then adds, "I don't want you to feel trapped. I want you to be able to leave, take a breather from us, whenever you want."
"I don't feel trapped. I'm truly excited about this child. And why do you want me to have all this distance from the infant whenever I want? Why should the baby only have to change your life? Why can't it change mine too? And why can't I be happy about that change?"
"Will was supposed to move in with you" she reminded him.
Robin shook his head, exasperated. "He's well-aware I'm having a baby and he's already looking for a new place. Do you honestly think he wants to be a roommate to someone who has overnights with a newborn?"
Regina sighed. "I can't remember you ever mentioning that you wanted to be a father before."
Robin shrugged "Never once have you told me you wanted to be a mother" he reminded her. "But I've always wanted children. What do you think I was thinking about when I got a three bedroom townhome on the outskirts of the beltway all to myself?"
"To show off?" Regina asked, causing him to laugh.
"Not only for that reason, and not only because it was a good investment, and not only because my mother wanted me to use my share of my grandfather's inheritance well. I saw myself settling down soon."
She doesn't say anything, but finally begins to eat, which makes him happy. After a few moments of diving into his own pizza he speaks again.
"So, in summary. I want this child, I didn't want to tell you just how much I wanted this child in case you didn't, I didn't want you to feel guilty about whatever decision you made, or whatever happened in early term. But the thought of having a child to care for, to teach, to love – all that makes me very happy. It's not a burden. It's a gift, Regina. And I was already breaking out of all those bad habits, because I very much want to be the dad this child deserves."
It seems like minutes pass with her staring down at her pizza in silence, before she finally speaks.
"I'm exhausted." She says a little quiet, a little cold. "Let's go to wherever we're spending the night.
It's a nice cabin. It's not a camping cabin like she had feared. It's a home, in a little wooded area by a park, with exposed wood but with full amenities, a nice kitchen, a big tv, and a king size bed as well as a separate room with bunk beds, so she has the option of sleeping separately, which, under the circumstances, is probably a good idea (but let's face it, she thinks bitterly, she'll sleep in his bed because she hates being apart with him, because she's far too dependent on him because his smell and his arms are the most comforting thing she has in her life right now ).
They had to stop for groceries on the way, or he insisted on it, a few items for Regina and himself, and apparently he's going to cook for her tonight.
It's the first weekend in October, but it's as hot as summer, and when they walk in the little cabin it's stifling hot, and Robin immediately tells her there is air conditioning and rushes to find the thermostat to turn on the air. He looks nervous, unsettled, like he's afraid of her. Silly, she thinks. If anything he should know he has her wrapped around his finger. Even if it was a matter of pride, she isn't one for empty threats and when she told Robin she was calling Emma to come and get her, she meant it. But then the thought of leaving him, of leaving them in such a bad place seemed intolerable, made her feel physically ill, and right then and there she knew she'd probably follow Robin wherever he led her.
And that terrified her.
Robin is putting groceries in the fridge, and she shuffles off the bedroom to put her luggage away and to change out of her (borderline tight) dress into cotton shorts and a tank top, pushing her hair into a high ponytail. She suddenly feels lighter, more free, realizing the halter top had dug into the back of her neck, coughing her to develop a slight headache and some definite neck pain.
She walked back to catch Robin peeling off his shirt and undershirt, and is hit with a pang of arousal. She's seen him naked a hundred times but she never really gets tired of it. His tie and jacket are on the little kitchen table and throws his button-down shirt and then the undershirt on the table from where he stands at the fridge.
"Putting on a strip show are we?" she asks, with amusement in her voice. She is supposed to be mad at him, for a reason she can't remember but she IS supposed to be mad at him, and she shouldn't be flirting with him.
He looks up, winks at her, "Now that we have a child to support it's time I get a second job so we can start a college fund."
Regina rolled her eyes, did her best to look annoyed, but she couldn't hide the amused smirk from forming at her lips.
"So what should my stripper outfit be? Sexy cop? Sexy fireman?"
Regina scrunched up her nose, shaking her head. "You? Sexy forest ranger? Sexy boy scout leader? Do they make tear-away khaki cargo shorts?"
He laughed at the idea. "Khaki shorts and tube socks, the sexiest of stripping outfits."
She nodded with a smile. "So, what did you have planned for us today?"
He looks back at the fridge with a sigh. "There's some hiking. There's a lake. I was going to see if I could coax you into a little hike and a little swim in the lake – I know how you feel about still water and bacteria and all that but…I thought I could be convincing…"
"I didn't bring a swim suit anyway" she said flippantly.
"You left one at my house and I packed it for you." He said with a smile. "But, there will be time for all of that tomorrow. I didn't anticipate today to be as…draining. Physically and emotionally." He's looking at her in that tender way now, the look she both loves and hates. Hates because it seems too close to pity, or maybe because it just seems like he can see right through her. "You should sleep" he says softly.
But no, no, she can't really sleep now. She said she was exhausted earlier and she was. She was exhausted of talking about living together, exhausted of fighting, but truth be told, the anxiety-riddled morning with her parents had pumped her through of adrenaline, and she was high on it now, unable to come down. Too riled up to fall into an easy sleep.
"I can't really sleep," she said, her hand finding the back of her neck, rubbing it to soothe the ache, "I'm too…."
"Tense?" Robin asked and he was walking towards her, his hand meeting hers behind her neck. That's not it, exactly, but it's somewhat true. She is tense.
"Sore neck from sitting in the car for hours maybe? Let me rub your back, it'll help you relax."
She doesn't argue, she leans into his bare chest and nods her head. He's walking her to the couch a second later and she sits with her legs sprawled out on the couch, her back to Robin sitting on the couch behind her, who never takes his hands away from rubbing her back.
He has good hands. He knows how to soothe her aching muscles. Probably because he had years of experience getting to know her body, especially in the recent history. It's easy to get lost in the feeling, but it's not making her tired, exactly. It feels good. Really good. A familiar tingly ache is in the pit of her stomach. She should blame the pregnancy hormones, not her own heart. It's not as if Robin was trying to seduce her with a perfectly innocent backrub.
He pulls at her tank top, going to lift it – he's done this before, he knows it's better to rub her bare back, but he still asks "This alright?" and she finds herself nodding
And when the tank top slips up, rubbing against all-too sensitive nipples on its way up, she inhales sharply to bite back a moan at the sharp pang of desire she feels, warmth spreading from her nipples to a lower, much more sensitive place. She squeezes her thighs together as an almost knee jerk reaction.
Hopefully he didn't notice. It would be mortifying if he noticed.
But he probably did notice, because he is Robin. He at least heard the damn-near gasp she made.
And his voice is smooth and almost concerned when he asks "You alright?"
"mhm" she responds absently. And she pauses, thinks of an excuse but there is none. "I'm pregnant, so even the fabric of my tank top moving over my breasts is like…I dunno, they are just really sensitive."
"Oh." He pauses for a beat before rubbing her sides, right by her breasts and she inhales sharply again.
"Good sensitive, though?" he asks, and she can almost hear the smirk he must be wearing now, can almost hear that smugness in his voice.
"Don't be so proud of yourself" she bites back, "It's the pregnancy hormones making me turned on at the drop of the hat, for the past few weeks it's like the littlest thing—"
"For the past few weeks?" he asks, almost angrily. There's a pause, and then his hands come from behind to stroke her thighs. She lets out another sigh, frustrated her body betrays her like this.
"Regina" he almost purrs as his hand makes his way up her inner thighs, caressing her, til one hand tugs at the hem of her tiny shorts, moving upwards until his hand is stroking her sex, clearly able to feel how wet she already is - she can hear his breath draw when he feels her, and she's wondering whether she just ought to let this happen when he screws everything up and says "let me take care of you."
His words are like a bucket of ice water on her building desire, and she gets up quickly.
"I do not need you to take care of me. I'm perfectly fine taking care of myself." She gets up, because he's not tossing her a pity fuck, not fucking her because he thinks she needs it.
He's getting up, walking after her, and finally grabs her shoulder, turning her to face him. "Okay, what is going on?"
"I don't want…" she gestures in the air to the couch, "that because you think you owe it to me. Like you giving me a happy ending after a backrub. I just—look, it's only good for me if you want it too, and you haven't really wanted me –"
Robin lets out a guffaw at that moment.
"I haven't wanted you?"
"You haven't even tried to touch me since I told you about the baby, and I get that things are different, and I'm different, I'm not upset about it or anything…"
"I haven't touched you because I don't know the rules here. And there was never a good time to bring this up. You were sick. And sad. And nervous. And—"
"And I was getting fat" she finished, walking to the kitchen, for what reason she didn't know, she just couldn't look at him and be near him while they talked about this.
But he followed her into the kitchen, laughing – laughing at what she said.
"Regina, you look exactly the same."
She rolled her eyes.
"Come with me a second." He holds out her hand.
Sheer curiosity has her taking his hand and following him. He sits on the couch, directing her to stand in front of him between his legs. She feigns a minor protest but his eyes plead her to stay. "Indulge me for a second" he says, taking each of her hands in his own hands.
"I don't know what you see in the mirror," he says, smiling at her, "but you're going to get bigger, you will. You're carrying a child. But the thing is, you haven't really changed at all yet."
He moves her hands over her thighs. "Same legs."
Over her hips.
"same hips"
Reaches around behind so she's touching her ass
"Same great ass"
She laughs as he moves her hands over her breasts.
"Those are bigger, I'll give you that, but that's not really a bad thing."
She bites her lip, and then moves her own hands down to her stomach. His follow hers, still on top of hers.
You couldn't really see the difference, oh, but you could feel it. She shifted her hands out from underneath his purposely, flipping the hold and pressing his hands against her stomach. It was softer, fluffier. Her stomach used to be as flat as a board, with maybe a thin soft layer over it, just a soft layer of skin under hard abs.
Now, it was very soft, and there was a slight roundness to it, a slight roundness that was unmistakeable. Robin bit his lip, trying to keep from smiling. She was proving him wrong.
"You feel softer, but you look the same. And soon you're going to get bigger but honestly Regina," he takes a deep breath in, sighing. "this pregnancy isn't going to stop me from wanting to fuck you all the time. I don't know anything that would change that. " she lets out a small giggle squeak out before she rolls her eyes and lets out an exasperated groan. But it comes too late.
"For weeks you haven't even—"
"For weeks you've been driving me crazy." He finished for her.
"You barely even look at me."
She needs to hear it, so Robin takes the bullet and decides to confess. "You think I'm asleep while you're getting ready in the morning, but I'm not."
Her eyes widen for a second and then she cocks her head to the right "You've been spying on me?"
"I've been watching you shimmy into those skirts and those dresses every morning, do you even know how sexy you are when you get ready for work? The little dance you do in the mirror each day when you're checking to make sure your clothes are spotless, making sure they fit exactly right, double checking your makeup, brushing your hair til it's just right…." He laughs "It's sort of OCD, but I love it, and seeing you naked in between the occasional wardrobe change isn't bad either. Oh, and I got to see those little hints of cleavage weren't happy accidents, it's all quite contrived."
Regina winces, thinking of how she'd adjust her top just so, to make sure that only a hint of skin was exposed. She flushes red.
Robin goes on. "That fucking beautiful black dress, with that square neckline" he grabs her hands, pulling her toward him, encouraging her to sit on his lap. She does, straddling him. She gives a little smile, biting her bottom lip. "you were adjusting the cleavage just so, and you had…" he groaned, just the memory of it, "fucking lace panties and that little bra" his hands are caressing over her skin now, and she's melting into the touch. "I wanted to grab you, strip you out of those clothes, and fuck you right then."
His mouth is drawn to her neck, and she tilts her head to give him more access, her hands on either side of his neck. "Why didn't you?" she asks, a bit breathless.
"I didn't think you'd let me make you late to work" he growls into her neck as he plants kisses down her neck, onto her shoulder. "I regretted it, when you bent over in the mirror to adjust your makeup right before you left and your ass…" he grabbed her ass greedily just then pushing her closer towards him, towards where he's already hard for her. "Your ass in that dress…it's a good thing we don't work together because I would never get anything done if you were around me all day."
None of what he's saying is an exaggeration or untruth, and she's pushed up and straddling his erection now, and she knows, know he wants her. It's a nice feeling, especially with all the anxiety her changing body has given her over the past month.
"I still thought about you all day that day" he groaned, as her hips rocked against him, as he watched her face twist in pleasure as her hips rocked against him, rubbing against the length of him, and it was perfect, after what seemed like ages.
"Probably would have just said fuck it all and would have tried to get you into bed that night" he said, his hands on her hips, guiding her as she rocked against him, and he's rock hard now, his breathing erratic and his face flushed "but you decided – god that's good – decided not to spend the night that night."
"I'm sure I would have changed my mind if – mm!- if I knew what you wanted to do with me" she answered, her eyes screwed tight, focusing of the feeling of him beneath her thighs, the feeling of her wetness already causing her underwear to slide against her in the best of ways. "I remember that day. I- I wanted it too." It wasn't a lie. She had dressed sexy that day for a reason, because she was feeling sexy, feeling sexual, but somehow, towards the end of the day, she lost her confidence, caught herself in the mirror and was convinced her face had fattened, her arms looked bigger, that she wasn't sexy, she was a mother and resigned herself to her apartment for the night, feeling foolish for trying to look hot when she was pregnant.
"You left me all alone. I had to rub off to the thought of you instead" he groaned. And something about that admission does things to her, makes her feel sexy, powerful, has the last sense of self consciousness leaking out of her.
"God I need you" she moaned into his mouth between passionate kisses. She reaches down between them, fumbling with his belt, and she thinks she might just ride him just like this, on this couch, a nice quick, hard fuck would feel good, would relieve her aching parts and relieve the tension the day had brought.
But Robin clearly has other plans, because he hooks one of his arms under her ass, uses the other arm to brace against the arm of the couch, and he's rising up, holding her with him.
She lets out a little squeak, but her legs wrap around his bare torso instantly.
"Bed" he almost growls, and it's carnal and deep and hot. "It's been weeks since I had you, I want you in bed."
She doesn't protest, because this is good too, her arms wrap around his neck and she kisses him, as he tries to navigate an unfamiliar home to get to a bedroom.
It's not perfect - he bumps into a wall and fumbles with the door to the bedroom, but it doesn't matter as he throws her down on the bed so hard she bounces up a little, and he leans down to kiss her belly button, his hands rubbing her clit through the shorts and underwear. "God sweetheart, you're soaked" he moans, and she knows, would almost be embarrassed if he wasn't so enthusiastic about it, wasn't pulling her shorts and underwear off immediately, his head diving between her thighs, immediately licking between her folds and groaning in pleasure, sounding as he's deriving almost as much pleasure as she is from this.
He doesn't normally do this, he usually is all tender touches and slow when he's between her legs, so he had to be pretty riled up, and she thinks he's going to make her come fast, she's already far past the point of needing foreplay, and hopefully he isn't in the mood to tease her, because she didn't think she could handle it right now. But then his tongue is licking up her wetness softly, grazing over her clit with the tiniest pressure, and light, his hands are on her thighs instead of inside her, and it feels just good enough to build the ache to an unbearable level, and he knows what he's doing, knows it.
"Robin!" she says, surprised by the sternness in her voice, and he chuckles into her, his breath warm and teasing on her clit, and it's sweet torture.
"You taste amazing" he mutters into her folds as he continues to tease her sensitive flesh, and she's close, so close it's painful. Her hands are in his hair now, tugging him up to her while her hips rock against his face, trying to get any friction to alleviate the sweet pain she's experiencing from being so close for so long.
She moves her hand from his hair to her crotch, attempting to finger herself while he teases her, but it's a hopeless endeavor, and he swats her hand playfully away before she can even try.
"I need your fingers" she says, and she's panting and desperate "Please, Robin, I'm so-, mm! I'm so close I can't…please"
He gives into her at that, because he loves it when she begs, and she knows that, knows him at this point, better than she knows almost anyone. When he hooks his fingers just right, changes her tongue to firm licks, and hard sucks, the pressure she likes, she needs…she has a flash of awareness that this is different than other relationships in her past. Robin knows her better in every way, better than Graham. But also, she can't deny, better than Daniel.
If she wasn't seconds from an orgasm it would have ruined the moment. She would have thought too much, focused on what it might mean that there was someone in her life who actually knew her so well – someone besides Emma, Emma, who only achieved such status because Regina was convinced she had a super power and could read her mind. But this, if she let herself dwell on it, this was intentional. She let him in. She let him get to know her in a way she swore no one else would.
But it helped that just then, he added a finger, and she was hit with a wave of pleasure she could ride out instead of focusing on whether she was hopelessly loss to this man beyond repair. The pleasure took over, and she focused only on it.
His licks became stronger, focused directly on her clit, and when he added short, gentle sucks her body started to move of its own accord, and she cried out his name, too loud, she thought, but then there were no nearby neighbors to embarrass her, so she felt free to be as loud as she wanted.
She begged him to suck on her clit, moaning and writhing as he pressed her up and over the precipice, reveling in the feeling of Robin's own moans against her skin as he licked and sucked.
He didn't stop until she had come down from her high, until she placed her hands on his shoulders and pulled, begging him to meet her for a passionate kiss. But then it was her turn to shuffle down on the bed, looking at him coyly as he leaned back, placing both of his hands behind his head and smiling like he was getting some special treat.
Regina took him in his mouth softly, and sliding him all the way down her throat before following with a hard suck, earning a loud Oh God Regina! From the top of her bed, and she fights a smile at hearing it. He's a good man, Robin is. And she loves any time she can make him happy, he deserves it, whatever happiness and pleasure she can give him. So she takes him in her mouth deeply licking with her tongue up and down his shaft, reveling in every moan and word of pleasure that comes out of his lips, even enjoying the way his hips begin to thrust, as he tells her she's the best at this, that no one has made him feel better. She keeps her pace, a hand on his shaft to help as she bobs up and down, and she knows he's close and doesn't care, he could come in her mouth right now and she'd have enjoyed doing this, enjoyed herself.
But his hands reach the back of her head, trying to hold her still, moaning again before he pleads "Regina I want- want to – god – fuck you."
She releases him and climbs on top of him, taking him inside her in one swift movement. Hearing his moans had affected her, and she was aroused and ready for him, breathing out a big puff of air as she took him all the way inside.
Robin was looking up at her, squinting a bit. "God I missed you. I missed this with you."
She began to rock up and down on him, slowly at first, a bit self conscious as he looked up at her changing body.
Robin was too far gone to focus much on any one feature of her body anyway. His hands closed tightly around her hips as she helped him move around him.
"Don't ever –mm – don't ever take this away from us again"
She resists the urge to stop and tell him that she never took away their sexual intimacy, the ball was always in his court that he took it away from her. And she could remind him that this might never happen again, but even she doesn't believe that at this point. While she's pregnant, at least, it'll happen again and again for as long as Robin wants it to happen.
Until Robin doesn't want it anymore, which is likely to happen at some point in the next few months.
It's probably a bad idea to continue this, because everytime this happens she feels all warm and close to him, as if they were a couple, and they are not, because she's not made for that, not made for the intimacy and love and coupling he deserves – not anymore, but she's going to enjoy this while she can. she keeps it up moving him inside her at just the ride pace, into just the right spot, until a particular zing of pleasure has her breathing out hard, lurching forward and placing both her hands on either side of his head.
"fuck – sl-slow down, love" Robin calls out to her, fighting to keep his mind steady through this.
She doesn't want to slow down, she loves him like this when he's so close to the edge and making sexy, guttural moans while his face shows every pulse of pleasure going through his body. So she doesn't stop, keeps it up, until he puts a hand on her neck, another on her waist, and flips them, fast, so she's on her back.
He's looking down at her with a victorious smile and she can't help but laugh. He's going in and out of her at a torturous slow pace at this point, making her insides clench with the sweet ache.
"I'm not rushing this," he tells her in a throaty hushed voice, and it riles her up further, has her wanting a release now.
She whines a bit at the slow pace, bucks her hips and tries to speed up the motion, and it draws a smile out of him, far too adoring and sweet for a casual sex partner.
"Robin!" the tone of her voice annoys her. She's whining. "make me cum"
Her request has him closing his eyes, knitting his brow tight, and then he pulls off and out of her all together. She sits up, broken from her lust-induced haze, a confused look on her face until Robin quickly replaces his cock with his fingers. She lays back down.
"Too close" he explains, a little breathless. "You feel too fucking good, Regina"
She hums a response, enjoying the moving of his fingers working her up and pushing her to her next orgasm. Her breathing gets faster and she looks up when she's close.
"I-i-need you ins-inside me" she begs, and he takes out his fingers and slams a throbbing erection back inside her quickly. He doesn't go slow now, grabs both her legs and bends them at the knee over his shoulder. She likes that position, as ridiculous as it much look, it feels incredible, he feels bigger, and the angle is just right and -
"I'm—I'm going – I'm comingggg"
It had only been a few thrusts, but she had been wound tight and she had needed this for a few weeks now. It's a strong orgasm, stronger than the first, makes her see stars behind her eyes and stays with her for what seems like minutes, as her hand grips his ribs tightly, a silent plea to not stop, to not let up.
"You feel so fucking good when you come" he moans, continuing the thrusts. "Fucking incredible" and he thrusts hard inside her again "Best I've ever had"
"Me – me too" she says. It falls out of her, she's honest and vulnerable mid-orgasm, but it's true, and she can't imagine he didn't know it was true anyway. Sex like this is much more rare than romance novels or movies would lead you to believe. Of course he was the best she'd ever had.
But her words must do something to him, because he groans loudly and then she can feel his erratic thrusts, and he whispers that he's going to come, going to come inside her so hard, and all she can do is nod and tighten her grip on him as he spills inside her.
When it's over he pulls out quickly and flops beside her on the bed, pulling her into his side as soon as he lays down, next to her. She moves to her side, wraps her arm around his torso, her hand moving to grab his. And then she moved off him and pulls, trying to get him to move to his side to spoon her.
But he wants to see her face, and she's being playful, so he pulls back, with that hand, encouraging her to lay on his chest. She goes easily, a wide smile on her face.
Everything feels almost too perfect in this moment. She's in her friend's arms, and he's gentle and kind and an incredible lay, and she's having a baby with him. On the list of things she'd never thought she'd have when she lost Daniel: a child, incredible sex, and a best friend. All of which she has now.
Robin looks down at Regina as she lays on his chest, a big, cheesy grin on her face. He loves her like this, looking carefree and uninhibited. Loves the way she draws him in close, the way you can almost see how open and unguarded she is. She's even more beautiful to him in these moments, so much he almost can't stand it.
"You're happy" he notes.
She hums in agreement. "Aren't you?"
He's drawing circles on her back now, lightly, as she lays on his chest. "Do I have reason to be?" he asks playfully. When she looks up at him in a cute scowl he laughs, adding "Are you moving in with me, Regina?"
She huffs out an exaggerated sigh, laying on his back. "Yes, you big baby. I'll move in with you."
He wraps his arms around her and she lets out a laugh, then moves her head to look him in the eyes. "You are going to regret this, just you wait."
He laughs, shaking his head. She doesn't see the look of adoration on his face when he looks down at the woman laying on his chest. "How could anyone regret more time with Regina Mills?"
"I'll remind you of that after we've lived together a week. You can ask Emma. I can be…quite particular about things."
He squeezes her tight. "This is not news to me."
She laughs, pressing a kiss into his chest. "I'm really sorry, about all of this."
The unnecessary apology frustrates him to no end, because he truly regrets none of this and wishes she could understand. But instead he just holds her tighter, silently promising to be at her side through everything.
The rest of their time alone passes in the cabin, and it's healing, and intimate. He's all over her, to his credit making good on his promise to never stop wanting her that way, they manage to get in a hike that morning, and it's gorgeous and beautiful, especialyl through the excited eyes of Robin, who has always loved the unspoiled outdoors. Regina seems to genuinely enjoy herself and forget about the stress that her mother has caused. The trip back home is spent planning how they will merge their two lives under one roof, where Regina's furniture will go, what they will do with two sets of dishes, and who has the better set of pots and pans.
It's a new chapter she's starting, she realizes. But not a bad one.