Disclamer… arg.

Inu's Hanyo: ok heres the deal.. I love Inuyasha.. and lord sexy caugh I mean Sesshomaru. Lol. But./.. tear sadly I do not own them, that's for Rumiko Takahashi.. break down crying

BTW.. this gets sad… yeah.. I wrote it.. and cried when I read it to myself.. so yeah.. I warned u.

Chapter 4

'A beautiful loss'

By,

Inu's Hanyo

"Inuyasha…" the sweet voice carried slowly through the thicket of dark green trees. "Inuyasha..." it called again, as sweet as ever.

The hanyo's white puppy ears twitched as though they had been disturbed by a cool breeze, not by a sound.

"Inuyasha…" came the voice once more, it was louder this time and becoming clearer.

"hmmmm." mumbled the hanyo in his sleep, not opening his eyes and not gaining full conciseness. (sp)

"Inu-yasha.-" this time the voice was more distressed and seeming almost scared.

"Kag-ome.." Inuyasha mumbled, still sleeping.

"Inuyasha… .. help me." The voice rang clearer and louder than ever before in his ears. It was a woman's voice and the woman was scared.

"Kagome!" the hanyo yelled. His eyes were wide open and he was running through a cloud like white mist. "Kagome! Where are you?!" he yelled hoarsely stopping to look around. His red kimono felt heavy and his body was tired.

"Inu-yasha" a new voice called. This voice was strong, deep and belonging to a great Youki. "You must stop searching for your love through your memory".

"What?" Inuyasha asked blankly looking around.

"She died Inuyasha, and you will not find her here" the man said, still hiding himself from the hanyo.

"How do you know that? Who are you?" Inuyasha bluntly asked getting frustrated with the voice.

"Who I am is not important now. You assumed right, Kagome is still suffering. Her body has died but her soul still continues to long. She has been released from the binds of this world yet she still has the heart of the same woman you knew. But remember Inuyasha she has died and because of it her spirit has let go of her humanly virtues." The voice spoke in a soft tone as it was trying to explain. Inuyasha stayed silent, not out of fear but because he was deep in thought. He knew the voice was right, he believed every word. It all made sense. Kagome died but her soul still remained in the land of the dead.

"How do I get to her?" The hanyo demanded out of the blue.

The demon god was taken aback by this. 'So quick to run to her side, but it wont be that easy.' "You cannot." the male voice said calmly.

"What?! Then why the hell tell me all this crap if there's nothing I can do?" Inuyasha yelled.

"You want to do something for the lady?"

"Duh!" Inuyasha almost screamed out of frustration.

"Do you ?"

"Yes" Inuyasha said through gritted teeth.

"… Do you love her?"

Inuyasha was silent for a long time, thinking over his answer to the question he has been asked over a thousand times.

"with every ounce of my blood, demon, human, and hanyo. More than any and every star in the cloudless night sky, I love her. She holds the key to my bleeding heart, and only she can mend the puncture wounds brought on by countless others. She is the one I love, the one I breathe for, the one I would give everything to just to see her smile…. And feel her kiss.. I would give it all. I love her so much."

Everything went silent, the surrounding darkness which loomed with a sense of foreboding, seemed to lighten.

Suddenly a flame appeared out of nowhere. It shone, a lonely red and orange light, perched atop a candle in the center of the darkness. The candle fluttered as if there was a soft breeze kissing its sides, but there was none to be felt. The flame continued to dace, letting off only a sliver of light.

The twenty year old half demon watched the candle with amazement. His pure golden eyes mirrored the flickering image of the lone candle. He studied every movement, letting the light warm him from the inside out.

The illuminating and lonely little flame reminded Inuyasha of something, or someone. As Inuyasha thought of the one woman in the world that he had ever truly loved, he could feel his eyes start to sting as tears began to form. She was indeed beautiful, like this candle, she was elegant and fragile, like the little orange flame before him, but she was also strong, fearless and headstrong, just like what this harmless candle could become if it was allowed to live…

"Kagome…" Inuyasha whispered sadly to himself as he closed his eyes. A single shimmering tear escaped the hanyo's closed eyes.

With Inuyasha's eyes closed the little flame began to dance ever more wildly. It curved and bent, flickered and shimmered. Then just as quick as it had ignited it went out. Again, Inuyasha was left to be surrounded in complete darkness.

"I love her.. I love her.. please… I need her. ." Inuyasha repeated over and over to himself, his eyes still closed tight and his body shaking.

Inuyasha felt the slight warmth of the candle disappear and opened his eyes. The molten eyes of the hanyo darkened ever so slightly as he realized his senses had been correct, he was again engulfed in complete emptiness. Inuyasha fell to his knees, felling as if all hope had been lost.

"Dammit." he whispered in a sad pathetic tone. Another salty tear seeped out of the hanyo's golden eyes and slipped down his pale cheek, landing with a drip on the hard cold ground.

"Please… give me my Kagome back…"

A flicker, another, and another. Soon many flickering flames sparked, filling the darkness with a low golden light. Spark, spark, spark. The air was warm now, with lit flames dancing all around. Inuyasha opened his eyes, gazing halfheartedly at the ground.

"Why me?... I've asked that question for over four years now,.. and I still haven't gotten an answer. …. He doesn't care for me…. he doesn't love me, …I. have no place in his heart,….. why cant I accept that?"

Her voice was cold, she was crying. Inuyasha could hear her voice, her cracking voice. His tired heart skipped a beat as he looked up to see an angel. No, not an angel, better. Kagome was crouched on her knees, in a pale white dress sobbing into her hands.

'kagome?' the hanyo thought as he stood from his knees, whipping the tears from his face. He watched her dumbfounded as she continued to talk to herself.

"I stayed with him.. for so long.. and for what?.. I love him.. but its unrequited. Why would he love me, im just a replica.. just a copy.. why would he want me?"

Her words hit him hard, it was like his heart was being ripped out. The woman he loved, sitting there, crying and telling herself these awful things. He took a step towards her, than another. She didn't seem to notice any movement so he continued, right until he was towering over her.

Even in tears she was beautiful, with her long black hair sticking to her wet face and the clothes she was in. a white gown, more beautiful than a wedding dress clung to her figure like it was ment to be there from the start.

"kagome." He whispered ever so softly.

"..Inu-yasha." Her voice cracked before she finished his name, her face still in her hands.

He bent down to her level, and took her wrist. She shuddered at his touch, but didn't look up. Slowly and tenderly he moved her hand from her face and took a hold of her chin with his other hand.

"Kagome.. please don't say that."

"say what?" Inuyasha was surprised to hear her respond. Last time he had seen her in his dreams she had acted like he wasn't there at all. But was this still his dreams.

"..say that I don't love you." the hanyo whispered.

"but its true.." Kagome sobbed, trying to pull her face out of her loves grasp.

"no, its not."

"..What?." her wet eyes opened. For the first time in a long time. Her deep brown-blue eyes looked shocked as she searched for his eyes.

To her he wasn't there, she couldn't see him, she could only hear his voice and feel his touch. It was like velvet was touching her arms and chin, it was like the wind, so soft and elegant, was itself speaking to her.

He looked at her face, her fragile face. Her eyes searching for something in the darkness. 'can she not see me?'

"kagome.. can you see me?" he just had to ask. Slowly she shook her head, her midnight hair flowing with the movement.

Inuyasha sighed but went on. "kagome.. please believe me."

Again the wind like song spoke to her. Its words loving and pleading. "Believe you?" her hand was still in his, she could feel his warmth on her skin. As if he was there. But she could see nothing; it was as if her eyes had shut down.

"…Kagome…I love you…"

-x-x-x-

What an ending!!! Well for the chapter hugh.. lol… my goodness that took forever to write.. im soooo sorry…. Damn.. omg.. I read it to myself outloud.. and I ended up crying… yeah.. I wrote it and still ended up crying… how pathetic.. … well I hope u liked. It… im so gonna try to have the next chapter up asap. In fact ill start it right now… the power is out at my house.. so no tv. Lol. So ill have plenty of time to work/// as long as my laptop doesn't run outa battery… XD

Well ja ne.. please please review.. I need some serious feed back… and again.. im so sorry it took me so long. School is killing me.