Disclaimer: None of it belongs to me.

A/N: As always, just let me know what you think. Critique is always appreciated, especially since my writing has been knocked down a lot lately. Apparently serious writers hate my style, my grammar is horrid, and I make atrocious spelling mistakes.

UNWRITTEN

I softly tabbed on the door to Jasper's study- walking in without waiting for a reply. He was situated in a comfortable looking leather chair. In his hands lay a book, it took him a moment to react to my entering. Then he took the book out of his lap and spread his arms invitingly. I moved swiftly, putting my head on his strong shoulder. We didn't have to talk, for he could feel my emotions more clearly then those belonging to other people. We didn't know why, maybe it had something to do with the strong connection we had to one another. Just like I'm attuned to his future, he's attuned to my feelings.

He was slowly stroking my arms, trying to ease the wall of tension he could feel. After a few minutes my fears subsided. What did I fear in the first place? Sometimes the horror of it all takes a hold of me. The idea of what we are, it's true we try harder than most and we succeed. Imagine being a monster, imagine loving a monster, and imagine knowing that the monster you loved could do so much wrong without you ever thinking badly of him.

"Jazz," I spoke softly.

A deep, thoughtful sigh came from his chest. I knew that he was probably trying to make out what I was so fearful about. He knew that he was the only person I would ever tell thoughts like the ones I was having right then. For everyone else I was mostly cheerful Alice. Everyone has their breakdown phases, but with him I never felt self-conscious for having them. He loved me and that would never change. Just like I loved him, another thing that would never change!

I turned trying to look into his eyes; they looked back alertly, questioning my intent.

"I love you Jasper Hale, you know that right?"

His questioning look turned soft with an edge of hurt, "Of course I know that, just like you know that I love you more then anything in the world. I would die without you Alice, just shrivel up and wait for death."

I understood his look of hurt; he was wondering whether he had done anything to make me believe that he didn't know how much I loved him.

I smiled, "I know, I just wanted to tell you again. In fact, I want to tell you every minute of the day. May doubt never fill your heart, whether we're together for hundreds of years or more."

"It won't, ever. Those are not the things you should worry about. What's truly bothering you Alice?"

"I don't know, if I did I'd tell you. I just have this feeling of something being of, like our entire family has been tipped of balance. I just don't want to ever loose you."

Slight shock was apparent on his face, but he hid it well, "Loose me? Don't be ridiculous, if there is one thing you can be sure of then that is my love for you. Don't you know all of the things I have given up for you? I'd do it all again in a heartbeat. You know all this; at least I was sure that you did. Don't you?" There was the hurt look again.

I looked at the cover of the book that had fallen to the floor, 'Philosophy through the Ages' by Walter Guttmann.

Smoothly changing the subject I said, "Oh Jasper, contemplating the meaning of life again, are we?"

He knew exactly what I was doing, but since he knew me, he led it go, allowing me to move on to a lighter subject. Not lighter per se, but not as hard to talk about. He knew that I would come to him when I was ready.

"Of course- what else does a person with unlimited time on his hands do? I choose to wreak my thoughts with question that cannot be answered to anyone's satisfaction. What are your thoughts on the matter?"

I settled deeper into his arms, "Funny how we the nonliving contemplate this, isn't it? The meaning of life is to do what you love, to never do anything you regret…"

He interrupted me, "Sometimes you can't help doing things you regret doing, because destiny has other plans for you."

"This is exactly why it's philosophy, Jazz. It's hard to answer-"

"I know, but try Alice…for me?"

"The meaning of life," I said giving it another try, "is to settle. I would say die, but that doesn't truly work for our kind. Plus the thought seems too easy for me."

°°°Jasper's Point of View°°°

She was so beautiful and she was mine. To this day I cannot imagine why she would choose me, the monster. Me, the person who had taken so many lives, who still initially wanted to take lives. She knows that the only reason I don't do it is because of her. Sure, I became disgusted with myself after a while for taking all of those lives, but the taste is hard to forget. I needed the blood; I craved the blood. Imagine never feeling truly satisfied and then seeing the things that could satisfy you right before you everyday. She says that it helps to think of them as people and it does, but it's still hard. The mentality I learned in the war was hard to shake of. I had to kill people then, didn't I? Yes, but back then I killed for what I believed in. Now I killed, because I couldn't control myself. I hated feeling so weak, every fiber of my being was screaming, "It's so much easier for the others. Why do you have to want to do it?"

Then what had happened on Bella's birthday. I was never going to forgive myself for it. Even though I knew that the others had already done so. In my eyes I would always be the monster that took away the lives of innocent people. Then I would see Alice's eyes; the way she looked at me with trust and devotion, trust and devotion that must be mirrored in my eyes as well.

I will admit it, I had women before Alice. She knows this. The single reason for why Maria turned me into this thing was due to her wanting me. She wanted me, so she took me. She did let me go though, because we weren't well matched. I cared about her, but never loved her as deeply as I loved Alice now. We realized this soon enough, and when she noticed how meditative I would get after taking another innocent life she knew it wouldn't be long before I left her, and the coven. She knew that it wouldn't be long before I went looking for something better.

Being with Maria can't be compared to being with Alice. The love that Alice and I feel for one another cannot be measured or compared to anything else on this earth.

I could feel her breathing in and out then, while she was lying in my arms. I could feel her emotions, a tumult of fear. I tightened my hold on her. She looks like a child, when you see how big she is, and at times likes these she was just like that, a fearful child. A fearful child I wanted to protect from anything bad, nothing would ever harm her while I was around to stop it from happening. I knew that Alice always would always feel the need to take care of everybody, but after more then 50 years of being together she was comfortable with letting her guard down in front of me and just letting me catch her.

We had been silent for a while; her nerves seemed to calm down. Suddenly she said, "Kiss me, and please make me forget."

Softly I pulled her closer to my body; feeling the ripples of emotion go through her body. I bend my head to hers and cautiously touched my lips to hers. She mirrored my motion. It was a soft kiss, the kind you wish would never end. For us it didn't have to end for we had all the time in the word. I felt her eyelashes flutter against my cheeks. A satisfied sigh escaped her lips.

We were evenly matched in mostly all things, sure I was stronger then her, but we balanced each other out perfectly. I was usually always brooding, while she was always cheerful and just happy. Even at times when her feelings would betray her toward me, she still acted happy for everyone else. We knew each other so perfectly, that we acted toward each other without thinking. Alice knows that there are times where I hate myself, where I can't be around this beautiful, pure creature I'm glad to call my wife.

I flipped her over, her small body fit on the leather seat just like I knew it would, never breaking our embrace or our kiss. We needed this at that moment; she had been brave enough to ask, as if she would ever have to fear asking me anything.

I knew how to make her forget the world around us, knew how to make her feel safe. For I loved her- and all I wanted was her safe in my arms. Forever…