I finally finished this chapter! Yay! Also, I have rediscovered the wonder that is the Homestuck soundtrack, and I may start reading MS Paint Adventures again! Now all I have left to do is smile and wave as the rest of my free time leaps out the window and into the abyss. If any of you have read Homestuck, tell me if it's worth getting back into or not and what your favorite soundtrack is! (Right now for me it's a tie between Pipeorgankind, A Taste for Adventure, and Pumpkin Party in Sea Hitler's Water Apocalypse) :P

He knew he had been a problem ever since he had first boarded the Ghost. He got in the way of everyone, messed up the system that had been in place for who knows how long, and wasted time by being the ignorant kid that had to have almost everything explained to him when everyone else already knew the information he didn't. And on top of all of that, he kept the entire crew from sleeping. It was surprising that they still wanted him around, but for some reason they still seemed to care.

It was a strange concept, having people actually worry about him. After being alone for so long it was taking some getting used to. He knew the crew sometimes interpreted it as him thinking that they didn't actually care, but that wasn't the problem. What Ezra didn't understand was why. He was a pain, an annoyance, a hinderance, a stupid street rat that had no business being involved in this fight and probably should have been gone a long time ago. It would have been better for everyone, but for some reason he couldn't bring himself to leave. After that first mission he might have been able to, but now it seemed impossible. He was drawn to this crazy band of rebels, even if he didn't understand them being drawn to him.

Even though there was some sort of bond between them, he was still hesitant about getting close to the crew because he knew where that would lead. With Hera doting on him and patiently answering every one of his questions with a smile, Kanan teaching him the ways of the Force and trying to keep him in line, and Zeb and Sabine playfully teasing him but being there to have his back… It was the family he had longed for for so long. But families didn't last, especially those who drew the attention of the Empire. Pulling away was his last feeble attempt to save himself and the crew from the pain that would inevitably come their way.

That was why he hid himself away in different parts of the Ghost when he felt overwhelmed and emotional. That was why he tried to avoid revealing too much when Kanan came to find him.

That was why he didn't tell Kanan everything he remembered.

It was probably a stupid decision, and Kanan would find out sooner or later (preferably later), but it was for the same reason that he'd asked his mentor not to share with the others just yet. And how would he have explained the mind-numbing coldness that he had felt after the pain had stopped? And the eyes - the glowing yellow eyes full of such malevolence and power that haunted him even now, in the safety of consciousness - how would he have explained those? Were those details even important? He didn't know, but he didn't want to burden Kanan with so much information right before a mission. It would only be a distraction. It was better to wait.

At least, that was what he tried to convince himself of as he half listened to Hera explain the details of the op to him and the rest of the crew. It was strange. Every time he almost managed to completely believe he was doing the right thing, He would be overwhelmed with a strong feeling of uneasiness, like this was the calm before a terrible storm that only he could tell was coming.

He was so focused on his internal conflict that it took Hera calling his name three times to get through to him. "Sorry, what?"

Hera stifled a yawn and waved a hand in his general direction. "I was asking if you were listening, but I think we already answered that. Try to pay attention, okay?"

Ezra grinned apologetically and nodded, forcing his focus to shift to the conversation at hand. It was ironic that in trying not to distract everyone else by keeping information to himself, he was the one who was zoning out. He found this realization to be much funnier that it usually would have been, most likely because he had reached that strange stage of sleep-deprivation that made people all giggly. He probably would have started laughing if he hadn't looked over and made eye contact with Kanan. His master's worried gaze and weary appearance was enough to sober up the hilarity immediately and send a flash of guilt through him. He turned away quickly before Kanan could catch it and kept his gaze locked on Hera as she continued.

"What we're trying to grab is mostly pretty standard stuff: weapons, health supplies, and whatever else we may need that we can get our hands on. But there's something else that's rumored to be shipped here, which is why we're so interested in it."

Kanan took Hera's pause as his queue and continued. "There's possibly some older Republic artifacts, specifically items related to the Jedi." That got all of their attention. Sabine and Ezra leaned forward in interest, and Zeb even raised an eyebrow at the revelation. "The tarkin in charge of this area has been trying to get in the favor of the Emperor recently, and we know he's been sniffing around for this kind of stuff."

"It's our job to find any and all of these items and make sure that they never reach Coruscant," Hera chimed in with a determined expression, appearing much more awake than she had been before.

This comment was met with several nods of agreement before everyone began to head off to prepare what they needed. Ezra turned to go to his room when he felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Kanan, of course, with eyes full of worry that brought back the gnawing feeling of guilt. He had been so close to quenching it with his focus on the mission! Despite the weight of his thoughts, he was still able to feel mildly grateful when Kanan glanced around to make sure they were alone before speaking.

"Are you sure you're going to be okay? You don't have to-"

Ezra sighed in exasperation and brushed the consoling hand off of his shoulder. "I'm fine. Stop worrying so much. Why is this such a big deal now?"

"I… it's probably nothing."

The hesitation would have usually made Ezra stop and pester his mentor until he spit out what was bothering him, but he was too distracted by his own thoughts and feelings to notice. Instead, he continued towards his room while shouting over his shoulder, "Then stop talking about it!"

Besides, he shouldn't have to worry about his personal problems now. It was time to ruin the Empire's day.

Special thanks to BlackRoseDraco, Maximus Potter, Rebels-lover, roguemango, tmp1114, NJ 50, DeathGoddesses, ArabianLover16, skylark24, and FireBirdThePhoenix. You guys are awesome!

FireBirdThePhoenix - Don't worry, I've got you! Here's a new chapter for your inner fangirl's enjoyment!

Maximus Potter - Aww thank you so much! I'm still a little hesitant myself because this story's a bit different than what I'm used to, but I appreciate your support.

Silver shines in moonlight - I will have a nice day, thank you! And we'll just have to see what happened to poor Ezra…

Chiibe the Rebel - Yeah, Disney tends to make everything fluffy. They are constantly killing off the parents of their princesses and still expect them to be emotionally okay? Seriously? (On that note, does that make Ezra a Disney princess? XD)

Ichichi05 - GROUP HUG FOR THE SAD BLUEBERRY! WE MUST PROTECT HIM!

Fireysun - *Monty Python voice* You're not fooling anyone, you know!

Paint the Fangirling Wolf - Oh goodness, that's a lot of soda! Here's another chapter for your sugar-crazed inner fangirl.

Specter14 - I guess you'll just have to keep reading to find out! Mwahahaha!

ErisEclipseNui - Thank you! :)

roguemango - Thanks! (P.S. I love your username!)

coraliturbe - ¡Voy a escribir rápidamente!