Disclaimer: Owned by Stephenie Meyer. Played with by Jexena
Friendly Advice
EPOV
Bella quietly sat beside me and ate her pizza on our way back to my house. I wished the whole way home that I could hear her thoughts just this once even though I was sure that once would never be enough. I was quite sure of what they surrounded but I still wished to know the actual content. Once we pulled into the garage, I was at her side opening the door for her - all before she even noticed that we had arrived home.
"Bella, Love, please talk to me you know what your silence does to me. I need to know that you are alright."
"Edward," She said softly as she put her hand on my cheek. "I really am so sorry. I was just trying to wrap my mind around all of this. Did she even try to call back while I was sleeping?"
It hurt for a brief moment that she actually thought that I would keep something like that from her, especially now. Even if it did seem to be a valid question in her mind. She might have thought - that I would have thought - that waking her for a possible renewed fight would not be in her best interest, so I would tell her to call back later or so I imagined she would think.
"If she had called I would of woken you love." I assured her as I walked her across the front lawn to the door. "You need to give her a little time. She was just sent a very rude awakening."
"What do you mean by that Edward?" She asked with a mixture of anger and confusion in her voice and eyes. I sat us back on the sofa just as she had done earlier in the day. Even the living room was deserted, giving the semblance of privacy; we both knew that the family was around and listening though.
"Love, think about it. As far as she knows, you are still not completely here. She has no clue about your daredevil days; either attempted suicides - because we are both guilty of that - or your rescue of me from the clutches of the Volturi. She does not know that the family is back or that the two of us healed ourselves by your forgiveness of my most egregious error. You need to let her cool down -"
My attempt at trying to explain Renee's side to Bella was cut off by a question from Esme. 'Edward, dear, do you mind if I try?" She asked with nothing but motherly concern as she continued down the stairs to join us. I looked up to acknowledge her, Bella then looked over her shoulder to see what had my attention. I nodded my head in the affirmative, and motioned for Esme to join Bella and myself on the couch. She chose to sit between us so that she was near us both.
"Bella, dear, as a mother I think I can give you Renee's unique perspective. Well, to a certain extent anyway." She then swung around and placed her hand on my cheek lovingly. 'My boy.' She said in her mind - there were accompanying flashes of memory that came with that thought, memories of the family no longer being complete because I was not here - before turning back to Bella.
"Renee has very limited information as Edward has just pointed out, but it is more than that. She knows that you are stubborn and that you came here more for her than for yourself. I say this because it is apparent that your self sacrificing nature is something you came to Forks with fully intact." She offered Bella a smile as her cheeks turned that oh so delicious red but kept going to try and lessen Bella's embarrassment. "As your mother, Renee, would have noticed it even if your stubborn side wouldn't let you be talked out of coming."
Bella smiled bashfully as I moved to sit behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist. She then leaned back into my chest as Esme went on.
"When you moved here a certain part of you saw it as a new start; here you had Charlie and it was your chance to be that independent teen you were deprived of being before. However, it is not in your DNA to be the one taken care of therefore, you then reassumed your role of caregiver with Charlie."
"With that position refilled you went about your daily life as best you could in this new environment, that is, until you met our dear Edward." Her eyes flashed to mine for the briefest of seconds that I do not think that Bella even noticed it. "You both then found something in each other that you never realized was missing from yourselves. It is so strong and all consuming that it went past mere human comprehension." She paused for a second before continuing that thought she was trying to hide from me. "You both found someone you needed more than life."
"Charlie is only now starting to understand the magnitude of it all and he has been here watching it grow the whole time. You went from hating Forks, to loving it, to being possessed by it, and now you are independently content to be here - as long as you are both together. He may not be one-one hundredth as observant as you are but he was here to watch it all as it happened. He knows that you are a smart woman. It is that knowledge that is allowing him to let you go in peace."
"Though I think that it is also the fact that he understands how much he missed while you were growing up. I cannot say for sure, maybe Edward can clue us in to his thoughts on the matter; I am sure that he regrets not being there for you from the beginning no matter what his reasons where for not leaving Forks with Renee all those years ago. It is that knowledge though that is helping him to know to not try to talk you down now. You will leave no matter what it might as well be on good terms so that there is the chance that you will come back of your own volition some day."
"I am more sorry than you could possibly know that that will soon be impossible yet I still believe that I am right in assuming that you are making the only viable choice for you. Moreover, I am happy on so many levels that you have made this choice even though I, like Edward, cannot help but morn the loss of all that you could have been."
Esme truly looked like she would shed tears if she could. I had never heard from her mind before that she felt this way. I mean I knew that Esme was no monster - as I could be - she was the epitome of a compassionate soul. However, she never once let on that she actually agreed with me about Bella missing the human aspects she was giving up without any thought.
Esme knew me all too well though, 'Don't you dare get any ideas out of that, Edward, it was a passing thought. As a woman that was given the opportunity to experience a little more of life than Bella is I know that it can be a good thing or a bad. You have acted in what you thought was her best interest on many occasions and it was the wrong choice. Trust Bella now to make just one decision for herself in the name of her own happiness. I actually believe that this all could have turned out much worse and that possibility lies in her actually doing what you intended for her to do. She would have forever been miserable with anyone other than you and you tried to force that on her. Be happy that she is actually smarter than you in some aspects.'
I could not help but smile at that last comment - even though the entire monologue was not what I would want to hear I could always count on my family members to tell me the things I needed to hear whether I wanted to or not - especially, when Bella would not say them to me. However, to constantly be reminded that this young woman could be so much more mature and intelligent than any member of my family was a constant loop that I was thrown into. Not that I could really complain as I rather enjoyed each time I was sent spinning.
"But I am getting off the topic at hand now. Renee is currently at war with herself. I am sure that she is feeling slightly selfish for letting you go, not only initially, but also when you were hurt last spring as well. She understands now that she wants to be the mother you need even though it as much in her DNA as being a child is in yours."
"This does not mean in any way that she loves you any less than she should. It just means that, while she would love to have progressed into that mother/daughter relationship most girls have with their mothers, she was never able to get past the bosom buddies stage. She is afraid to lose your friendship more than anything therefore, she is now at a loss as to what to do."
"She wants to be the words of wisdom in your ear right now however, she cannot get past her own initial try at love failing. She does not want that for you no parent would want that for their child. Now, she has the doubly hard part of only getting clips and disjointed information. Once again, it is partially her own fault if she had kept up with Charlie better, she may have had an inkling that this was going to happen. But now, she has to not only hear that she is totally out of the loop, but that you have sided with your father with something over her opinion."
"She is also realizing that that parental ship has sailed. You are an adult now; you do not actually need her permission for anything. Yet she sees that Charlie has found a way to get a sway over you even though he is just going along with your judgment. She is afraid that you have passed her place to him."
"So, now, not only was she not kept in the loop but she is feeling replaced as well. Just give her a little time. If the two of you are as alike as I think you are, Renee will not be able to go for long without fixing this. She feels as if she has already let too much time pass her by, or at least that is how I would feel." She looked to me once more before squeezing Bella's hands again.
"Thank you so much Esme." Bella said as she moved forward to give her a tight embrace - tight for Bella of course.
"Thank you, mom." I whispered as I too gave Esme a hug.
First and foremost this woman was a mother, she would do anything to see to the happiness of her children. I was just overjoyed each day that she counted Bella amongst us. I turned to Bella and wiped the tears from her checks as I pulled her to her feet holding her to me in a comforting embrace.
"Why don't you go to bed dear? We can have our family movie marathon tomorrow."
"Thank you again and good night Esme." Bella said as she hugged her once again.
'Anything for my newest daughter,' Esme thought for my benefit as she gave Bella a smile.
I walked Bella slowly to my room, just before she entered she turned towards the hall and said a general good night to the house. Our siblings all said it back and Bella entered the room with a smile.
"I am going to take a shower. I will be out in a little while." She said once the door was closed.
"Take all the time you need Love. I will be here when you get out."
"Thank you Edward." She reached up on her toes and kissed my lips lightly then went into the bathroom.
I changed into a pair of pajama pants and a t-shirt then calmly waited for her on the bed as I thought over Esme's unique perspective. I was more grateful for each member of my family everyday. They have been able to prove more and more lately that we are not a family without each and every one of our members.
Not to mention how lucky we are to have Carlisle and Esme assuming the roles of our mother and father. They have always done everything in their power to make sure that we are happy. It has recently come to my attention that I may not have always made that too easy for them. However, I was never one to be out rightly obstinate about any move that we made either. I was more the frustrating one that did not put in a vote towards the whole. I would just go with whatever action was pushed by the majority.
I now believed that they owed me just a little leeway in regards to Bella in the beginning - not that any of it matters now though - we are together, and she will be changed soon. Then we will become man and wife and we would belong to each other for all of eternity. Now that was a thought that would never get old.
BPOV
I took my time taking a shower as I needed to do some solo contemplation. I knew that Edward was more than willing to help me sort through all of this. Nevertheless, Esme had given me some things to think about.
I never wanted my mother to think that I had replaced her, she was my best and only friend growing up. I always knew that I was different from the other kids at school. I never felt like I belonged in that world and at first I though it was just the sunny, sporty world of Phoenix - I never minded it though since I always had Renee there for me. But I see now that it was the world of reality I was not meant for, I was made to be in the world of fantasy.
I would also forever be thankful for the last year and a half with Charlie. I am sure that, to the outside observer, we were not any closer than when I first arrived. But that was not true we had been thru a lot and it had bonded us in a way that even Renee and I did not have.
I was left now to contemplate on Esme's thoughts. Was she right? Did Renee actually feel that way? I was sure in my heart that Esme would never lie to me. I was also almost positive that her views on the subject had to do with, not only Edward's recent time apart from the family, but also when he had his 'adolescent rebellion'. I felt bad to think that my mother would feel so disjointed from me now. However, I was noticing that she had actually missed quite a lot in such a small amount of time. Even so, I would not give up everything that I had worked so hard to achieve.
With a new steely determination, I got out of the shower and dried off. I dressed in my pajamas quickly and went back into Edward's room.
"Edward," I said as I opened the door. "I have come to a decision. I am going to email my mother tomorrow morning. I will then give her until Monday to get back to me. If she does not then I will try calling her one more time. After that, it is up to her. I do not want to lose what little time I have left with her. However, I also cannot continue to be the adult here. I am wearing thin and I really need her to step up now more than ever. I am sure that Esme is right and she feels that it is too late. But I will have to find a way to show her that it is not. However, if she cannot move past this stubbornness that we seem to inherit in my family, I will need to move on, or at least try to, for my own peace of mind. Do you think that is too harsh?" I had to get his opinion for he was in this just as deeply as I was. Not to mention the fact that he had way more people to deal with from the get go.
"Bella, first I think you need to calm down just a little, I am sure that it will all work out. I know that this is all happening fast at the moment and I am very sorry for that. I am sorry that I was so stupid and stubborn but, you do need to give Renee some time. I do think that the email is a very good idea though. That way you will have the time to get across just what you are trying to tell her. You can tell her your views on all of this and let her know just how happy you are now. You are happy, right?" There was a crease in his forehead and his eyes looked so sad. I hated myself even more now.
I was letting this all turn into a giant mess again. Edward was doubting me and probably thinking that I was doubting him. I had to fix this all. I also had to stick to my pledge to show everyone, including Edward, that I am beyond happy to be becoming a part of this family. This was my true place in the world It was where I was made to be. I believed that we were made to be together with everything in me. Everything in our pasts gave us the strength and ability to be together and it would all be over soon. All the chaos, hurt, and pain would be behind us and we would be together for forever.
"Of course I am happy. I am so sorry if I made you doubt that even for a second, I love you and you know that. I am finding it strange though that, now that I have reprioritized things, it is becoming difficult to wait to become your wife, just as much as I found it hard to wait for you to agree to change me."
"Thank you. I know that you love me and I am happy that you feel that way now. I am sure that it will all work out after all, we have gotten through some tough spots before so we are pretty much assured to get through this too."
"Thank you, Edward." I said as I lay on the bed next to him. "Will you help me write the email tomorrow?" I asked as I molded my body to his.
"If you want me to … but wouldn't you rather do this in private. You know her far better than I do, not to mention the fact that I am sure you already know what you want to get across to her. I wouldn't want to give you bad advice and end up making things worse for you."
"Edward, there is nothing secret between the two of us. There is nothing that I would not want you to be a part of with me and I will always appreciate your insight, even if I think you are wrong at the moment. I know that there is always a reason behind everything you say and do and it mostly turns out to be your love for me. That being said, if you do not want to be a part of this since you do not know Renee very well I will respect that."
"I would be honored to help you then. You know that I would do anything to be with you."
"Thank you so much." I said as I tried to stifle a yawn.
"We can talk about this in the morning you need to go to sleep now." Edward said as he kissed my forehead and pulled the covers higher towards my chin. It did not take long once Edward started to hum my lullaby for me to fall asleep. I was very happy that he would help me compose the email in the morning. That would help it take less time, hopefully and then we would have more time with the family.
*~* MMO *~*
The next morning I awoke to Edward bringing me breakfast in bed. It was a simple egg and cheese bagel with a bowl of fruit. He had brought up orange juice and milk also. It was so sweet and it made me sad that I would soon not need to eat like this. It was a very sad thought since this was actually quite romantic.
We sat on the bed for a little while just cuddling, it struck me as the quiet before the storm. Not long after I finished my breakfast, Edward ran my dishes back downstairs and came back with a laptop.
"I thought you might want to start working on that email to Renee now." He said almost tentatively.
"That is a good idea as I am sure that if I waste anymore time we wont be able to have that movie marathon until tomorrow which would make it a short marathon."
Edward chuckled as he sat next to me and started up the laptop. "So do you have at least an outline of what you want the email to say?" He asked as he brought up my email account. I put in my password as I thought about it.
"Yes, I want to make sure that she knows that I could never replace her. I also want her to know that despite everything that has happened we are happier than anyone has any right to be. I also think I will give her a brief rundown of it all, no need to go into too many details. We want to help her come to terms with this not make it seem like even more of a first love/high school crush type of thing."
"That is a very good outline you have there, any idea what you need from me?"
"Yes, moral support, and if I get too emotional and start to cry I may need you to take over typing for me." I tried to smile to lighten that thought, even though it was a very real concern for me at the moment. I was going to be summing up the last year and a half in a letter for Renee. It was bound to get emotional. I could only hope that poor Jasper was not in the house. I may just drive him crazy by the time this letter is done with.
*~* MMO *~*
An hour later, I was no longer hoping Jasper was out of the house. I was a tightly wound bundle of nerves as I reread the email one last time before Edward pushed the send button.
Dear Mom,
I am sorry that my news took you so off guard. I did not realize how much time had gone by since we last had an actual conversation. I seem to have gotten myself consumed by the life I unknowingly created for myself.
I never realized that by giving you a little room to assume your renewed role as a wife, I would find a few new roles for myself as well. I want you to know, first and foremost, that no one has ever or will ever take your place in my heart. You are still my best friend. I have only just come to realize that it is quite possible to have more than one.
I hope that you can find it in your heart to be happy for me about the fact that I now have a relationship with Charlie. I have found it very easy to see how you could fall in love with him. There have been many moments when I could see the man you must have seen back then. I am so glad that I finally gave myself the chance to get to know him. However, as easy as that was to see, it was just as easy to see now how perfect you and Phil are for one another.
That part was harder to write than most of the rest. It made me think of Jake, and the fact that no matter how he felt - or how I tried to make myself love him - some things are not meant to be. I would forever feel sorry for Charlie. I was sure that he would never love another like he loved Renee, if he ever gave himself the chance to love again that is.
That being said, I hope you will continue to read if you have made it this far.
I realize that we have all had a very difficult year and a half, some parts being more difficult than others. I also realize that it is mostly my fault. (Edward did not like that line at all and we argued for a full ten minutes until he finally understood that I would not be taking it out. This letter was about telling Renee my side and this is how I felt. Not to mention the fact that it was the honest truth.) I have been accused more times than I can count in the last year of being too observant. Yet, I have been told just as many times that I refuse to see anything that pertains to me correctly.
This was made blatantly obvious just three days after my birthday. (By this time, I had already started to tear up. I was sure that Edward would be taking over for me soon. However, I had to relive these moments as much as Edward did so that we could stress our case. It was just lucky that we already had an alternate version of what happened. It would make it easier to write it all out.) Edward - the first boy I ever liked, the only man I will ever love - was forced to leave the state. His father had been offered a position at a hospital that he would have been stupid not to take.
You must understand - Edward has always had this odd notion that I was too good for him. He let this strange thinking allow him to break things off with me permanently when he was forced to move with his family to LA. He thought that, since I was beyond his realm of deserving, I would not be hurt by this abrupt separation. (I could not take it any more by this point. Edward had to take over which made it all go much slower since I had to calm down enough to let him know what I wanted to say and make sure that he actually put that in the letter.)
Edward did not seem to realize that he was ripping my heart out just as effectively as he was dislodging his own. His time spent in LA was not very productive though. The time apart affected Edward in a similar way to what it did me. In the end, his sister, Alice, came back to Forks to explain what was actually going on. (I knew it was killing Edward inside to have to type this for me. Yet all he showed was his love and devotion. I could not believe that I was hurting him like this yet again. I just had to keep telling myself that once all of this was over we would be able to start over new. It would never be like this again.)
When Alice saw that I was just as hurt as Edward was by the breakup she took me back to LA with her to talk to Edward. She explained on the way that he was acting very similar to me. So once we talked, the family had a meeting of their own, they concluded that they were not very happy in sunny California. So in the end Carlisle got his job back at Forks General - as if they were going to turn him away.
I realize, to you, this may seem very sudden. However, I assure you that we have had many conversations. We are now engaged because we have come to the decision, as a couple, that we cannot stand the thought of separation ever again. If it helps anything at all, just know that it will be a nice long engagement. We will still be going to college in the fall, not that I know yet what I want to study. The wedding is tentatively set at the moment for after we graduate.
I truly hope that this will help you come to terms with Edward and my relationship status. I understand that you may still need some time to let this all sink in. However, I do not see there being much left. I hoped that you would trust me to be smart enough to know what I needed to be happy. I will call you Monday, after school in the hopes that by then you will be able to speak to me again.
Love Always,
Bella
P.S. You are more than welcome to call or email me back before Monday. If you want to get a hold of me, you can get me on Edward's cell. I love you.
I was very nervous as Edward hit the send button for me. However, I did not think I could do any better with it. I was also now totally decided, I would call Renee again when we got home from school, before we went to Port Angeles for the SAT study session. That is, if she has not called me by then. I was not sure what outcome I actually wanted to happen though. On one hand, I wanted to be the one to call her. It would show my maturity and help my case. On the other hand, I wanted her to take back that role as my friend and call to get the details in a calmer more receptive manner. I would just have to wait and see what happened.
I stayed curled on Edward's lap for a little while longer. It was very comforting to have his arms around me right now. However, I was sure that Alice would want to get that movie marathon started so I opted to go join the family. It might actually help get my mind off things for the moment and I could definitely use the distraction.
EPOV
I felt terrible as Bella worked on her email to Renee. I was sure that it was all things that needed to get out in the open. Nevertheless, it was just reopening the wound I had put in her heart. I felt even worse once she could no longer continue because she was crying too much to be able to even see what she was doing. I took over the typing as she told me what she wanted to say. I did not agree with a couple points in the letter, however, the whole point as she reminded me was to get her views across to Renee. It seems that we would continue to come to an impasse on a couple issues for now.
As I read back the letter once more before hitting send I could not help but notice that there was a note of finality and goodbye to it. I wondered if Bella was aware that that was the feeling you were left with after reading it. It reminded me of back when we first started to talk about how we felt for one another. She said that she could sense that I was trying to say goodbye while I said and did other things. That is almost the feeling I got from this letter.
She was telling Renee that she wanted her to have this information so that she could be happy for us. However, in the back of your mind you cannot help but see all the points where she tells her time is up and in the end, approval really does not matter. I would have to talk to her about that later. For now, I just needed to calm her down. Alice was becoming saddened by the sound of her tears and Jasper was trying to get past all of the guilt, sadness, and loss that Bella was feeling right now. Not that I was helping what with my own feelings of guilt for my part of this whole mess.
"I think it is time for that movie marathon." Bella said quietly as she tried to wipe away all of the runaway tears.
"Let's go clean you up first." I told her even though she would always be glowing and beautiful to me, she tended to want to look presentable whenever she was around the family. She was never one for fashion, which killed Alice, but she was always lovely.
We went to the bathroom and I sat her on the counter as I wet a washcloth with warm water. I slowly and gently wiped it over her face to get rid of all the tear streaks. Bella had closed her eyes and was breathing deeply again. I have no idea when the change happened, or how for that matter, but Jasper was suddenly shouting in my mind.
'What are you doing to her Edward? She is about to pass out.' I quickly stopped running the cloth over her face and watched her. She looked fine to me maybe a little tired still as crying always did that to humans. Her breathing was deep but even and her heartbeat was steady.
"Why did you stop?" Bella whispered without opening her eyes. "That felt very nice and soothing." She then slowly opened her eyes. I was overcome with the thoughts going through my head and the look on her face. I leaned forward and kissed her softly. It was a slow sensual kiss that I was very happy stayed sweet. Bella seemed to be on the same page with me and did not overreact. I slowly pulled away and stared into her eyes.
"I love you Bella, with everything in me," I whispered to her as I leaned my forehead against hers. "I thank you for everything you have done for me and everything you continue to do. Thank you."
"You know," she said with a wistful far away look. "That sounds like the perfect beginning to wedding vows."
I could not help the large smile that overtook my face at that proclamation. It had just come out of my mouth as the only thing I could think about while kissing her was about her soft, full lips on my own.
"I hope you know," Bella said softly as she brought her arms around my neck. "I really do love you very much and I cannot wait to marry you. Then," She moved her lips to my ear and I had to close my eyes at the sensations she was sending through my body. She then whispered very low as she obviously did not want the others downstairs to hear her. I was immensely glad that she did accomplish her goal, or I would have to deal with Emmett. They were all wondering what she was saying to me. All but Jasper, that is, as he was sure to feel the spike of lust in me at that instant. I had no clue what he was getting from Bella at the moment however. She was acting very playful though. I was enjoying it immensely. It was like a brief glimpse into what was to come, or so I hoped. "I will turn you into a true man."
The shiver that ran through my body did not go unnoticed by Bella. She backed up and smiled as I tried to right my emotions and facial features.
"You can be quite the vixen Miss Swan." I whispered in her ear. Her accompanying blush and shiver was very satisfactory.
'What are you guys doing up there Edward. I know for a fact that the lust coming from the two of you right now means nothing. You really shouldn't be teasing each other when you still have a whole month before you can do anything.'
I would have to get us downstairs quickly now, or Jasper may just tell the others what we were up to.
"Come, my love." I said as I picked Bella up off the counter and set her back on her feet. "We have a family to bond with."
"Lead the way." She said with a smile.
*~* MMO *~*
We spent the rest of the day watching movies. There was no theme to what we watched as we just kept pulling movies out of the cabinet. Some movies were long, some were short, and some left you thinking at the end. We steered clear of horror and series films though. We decided that we could stick to comedy and action films. Alice even threw in a couple musicals and romances. Esme made Bella dinner at eight and then she went and changed into her pajamas before we continued our little marathon. By one o'clock Bella was passed out on the couch with her head on my lap. I carefully took her upstairs and laid her on the bed.
"Good night, my love." I whispered to her as I kissed her forehead. I then changed into some pajamas before joining Bella on the bed and wrapping my arms around her, settling in for the night. I had one more month to enjoy this nighttime ritual that we had. However, as much as I told myself that I should be mourning it. I could not find the proper mindset to believe that anymore. I would still be able to hold her as we lay in bed at night. Actually, I was sure that should I ask her to she would fake sleep for me for a little while. Yet the most important part of it all was that she would be in my arms for the rest of time. So what was there really to mourn I was now starting to ask myself?
BPOV
In the morning, I woke to an empty bed. I looked around for a moment to make sure that Edward was not just busy doing something else in the room. When I was satisfied that he was not in the room I called for him.
"Edward? Where are you?" He was instantly by the bed looking down at me apologetically.
"I am sorry love. I was talking to Carlisle before he left for work."
"It is okay," She said with a smile. "I was just wondering where you were. Is everything alright?"
"Of course it is love. Why wouldn't it be?"
That was a little suspicious. People tend to say that most often when there was something wrong that they were trying to hide. I let it go for the moment I had just thought of something that I could not believe I had forgotten about.
"Edward, do we have any plans for today?"
"Not really, no, why, what were you thinking of doing?"
"I wanted to call Angela and Ben and see if they wanted to go to lunch with us so that we could tell them our good news."
"That sounds like an excellent idea. Are you sure they don't have any plans of their own though?" He asked back.
"No I don't. I thought we could ask Alice to see if they did."
"No, they don't, they would love to have a double lunch date with you two." Edward and I looked at each other and laughed, Alice really could come in handy sometimes.
"Thank you Alice." I called down to her.
"You are welcome Bella."
I then got up and brushed my teeth afterwards I called Angela and asked her if she and Ben would like to join Edward and I for lunch at a small cafe in Port Angeles. She, of course, said yes and I went to go shower to get ready for our lunch date.
A half hour later I was clean and dressed as Alice helped me do my hair. Edward had gone with Jasper on a quick hunt and would be back soon. Alice was in the muddle of French braiding my hair when she all of the sudden pulled it unnecessarily hard.
"Ouch, Alice," I said as I rubbed the back of my scalp. When she did not answer though I looked back at her. Her eyes were out of focus and her hands were in tight fists around my hair.
I waited patiently for her to come to from her vision. I did not know what else I could do. When she did, she had a brief flash of panic in her eyes before she smiled and went back to braiding my hair.
"What was that Alice?" I asked. I hoped that she would tell me. She had once told me that she would always tell me the truth. That is, if she was telling me anything though.
"I don't know yet." She said absentmindedly. That did not bode well. If she had visions coming in sketchy, it could mean any number of things. She finished my hair quickly and was back to her normal self again. I did not like this though. I was trying to figure out if I was going to talk to Edward about it or just wait until she had more information. However, before I could make up my mind Edward was in front of me with that lovely crooked grin on his face that made me forget everything, even my name, for a moment.
"You look stunning Bella." He said as he leaned in to give me a quick kiss.
"Thank you." I said as I tried to stop the blush from overtaking my face. "Are you ready to go?" I asked to take the focus off of myself.
"Just give me a minute." Edward said as he started to unbutton his shirt. My eyes grew wide and I blushed even more as I quickly turned around. Before I knew what was happening I had been pressed up against the wall. "You know Bella there is no reason for you to turn around."
I could feel my whole head light on fire. I was sure it was going to do like on the classic cartoons, when they relieve the steam, soon. Edward was running his fingers up and adown my arms while his nose skimmed my collar bone. My hands were on his chest and it was very smooth and very bare. I could not seem to break my eye contact from his marvelous frame.
Soon he chuckled as he lifted his head and whispered into my ear. "We have waited this long my love, what is another month?" I was stuck, rooted to the spot, as Edward slowly backed up from me and walked into his closet to finish changing. When he came out, I was still trying to calm my raging heart and hormones. Edward was really very evil when he wanted to be.
"Edward," I said sweetly as he came back to me.
"Yes my love?" He asked as he took my hand and started to lead me out of his room.
"You had better hope that I forget moments like that when I am changed."
"Why is that?" He asked with that crooked grin on his face and an eyebrow raised.
"Because once I am like you I will pay you back for all the times you dazzled me." I said as I walked out of the room and started down the hall.
By the time I reached the top of the stairs he was back by my side.
"Who says you need to wait that long, you do quite a good job of teasing in your own right as is." He whispered as he helped me down the stairs so that I did not trip.
I blushed again as what he said sunk in. I could not think of a single time that I had tried to dazzle him like he had just done to me. Nevertheless, that did not mean that I was not going to have some fun over the next month now that I knew it was possible to get to him. I was brought from my musings as we reached the car. I noticed that he had not led me to the Volvo but his special occasion Austin Martin.
"Edward, why are we going in this? We are only going to a cafe in Port Angeles. We do not need any more attention brought on us."
"Please, Bella. I get to drive it so rarely. And if this isn't a special occasion I really don't know what is." He was pleading with those gorgeous light honey eyes. I loved the color they turned when he had just fed.
"Fine, but could you at least drive a little closer to the speed limit today?"
"For you I will refrain from going over one hundred miles per hour. Is that okay?" He asked seriously.
"I guess I have to take what I can get. After all, for you that is rather slow." I said with a chuckle. Edward then helped me into the car and we were on our way.
After a mere twenty-five minutes, we were pulling up to the cafe. It was a nice little place. It had small tables and there was even clam chowder on the menu. We got a comfy booth and waited for Angela and Ben. It actually did not take long for them to show up. I was pretty sure that the majority of their drive was performed while Edward and I were taking turns 'dazzling' each other.
"Angela, Ben." I said waving my arm to get their attention when they came in. They both made a beeline to our table and I hugged them both. Edward, however, opted just to shake both of their hands.
"So why did you want to meet us here all of the sudden?" Angela asked after we told the waitress our lunch orders.
"Can't I just want to have lunch with a friend?" I asked acting innocently.
"No," Angela said with a laugh.
"Well, I never," I said exaggeratedly.
"And you never will if you don't tell me why we are here." Angela said playfully.
"Well, if you are going to be like that I guess I just won't tell you that Edward proposed to me." I said as I clasped my hands together on the table so that the ring was very prominent.
Angela was very quiet for a moment before she started to squeal and jumped up to give me a second, tighter hug.
"Congratulations you two," She said enthusiastically. "When did this happen?"
"Friday, and before you say anything about that being two days ago, you are the first one outside of our families to be told.
"Is that why you weren't in school on Friday?" She then asked.
"Partially, we were already skipping for other reasons we had to take care of when he asked. So, we told our families yesterday and now we are telling you."
"When are you going to actually have the wedding?" She asked. I could tell that she was worried about college you could see it in her eyes, it isn't like most people wouldn't be.
"We are going to wait until after we graduate from college. We have already told our parents that it is going to be a very long engagement. That seemed to appease them all." I did not want to actually go into the different reactions that we got from everyone, and since it was true that most everyone was happy for us, it was a relatively easy answer to give.
We spent the next hour chatting happily. I could not help the sudden sadness that I felt once the lunch was over. Edward paid, much to Angela's protests, and mine, especially since he did not even eat anything. Ben however did not mind someone else picking up the tab. I tried the whole way home not to cry. However, that only lasted so long. I could not really help it. I was actually going to miss Angela, if I remembered her. That realization just made the tears come faster and harder.
"Love, why are you crying? You know what your tears do to me. Please, what has you so upset now?"
"I am sorry Edward. But I was just thinking that I am actually going to miss Angela. Then I remembered that that was only if I remembered her."
Edward immediately pulled the car over to the side of the road. He pulled me into his lap and stroked my hair as he tried to calm me with soothing words. Then he made it all even worse.
"Love, you know that you do not have to do this, I will love you forever no matter your choice. If you decide to stay human we can actually go to college together and then get married like we will be telling everyone."
"Edward, do not take these tears for weakness. I will not change my mind. I already told you that this is happening. You have finally agreed to change me. We are going to be equals soon. I would not change that for anything in this world, except you that is. But by doing it this way I get you longer. So I think I will be doing it my way this time."
"Bella, I didn't mean to make you think that I was changing my mind. I have actually started to come to terms with that fact of your change. I have also found that I am very much looking forward to it. Nevertheless, if you do change your mind, I would never think less of you. I love you and I will have you for as long as I am allotted. Be that seventy years or seven hundred. I will always love and cherish you. It is only up to you for how long."
"I choose Seven hundred thousand." I said with a watery smile.
"That sounds very good to me." Edward said with that cooked grin as he leaned in to kiss me.
Once he had me completely calm he set me back in my seat and we started for home again. When we got home, I decided to take a short nap. Crying jags always wipe me out I needed to get my strength back again. When I woke up again the clock on Edward's stereo read 6:15 pm. I stretched and went downstairs to see who was here.
As I walked into the kitchen, I found Edward and Alice sitting at the kitchen Island having a very heated discussion. Even though I could not hear it, I could see it in their faces and in their hand gestures.
"What's going on?" I asked tentatively.
They both swung around to look at me. Their faces where both those solid masks that they used so much at the beginning. I was not going to fall for that. There was no way.
"Nothing is wrong love." Edward said as he came to greet me. He threw a heated look at Alice and she joined in on his lie.
"You must have both hit your heads if you actually think that I am going to fall for that."
They both looked at each other then Edward tried to lead me out of the kitchen. "Please, Bella, believe me when I tell you that we have nothing to tell you at the moment. If we did, we would tell you but for now we need to feed the human." He said the last part with a lighter tone and a slight smile on his face. It really was too bad for him that his eyes could not hide the terror from me. He really should know better by now.
Well, even if they did not want to learn, I would. I would give them the time they needed. However, I would not forget. I would ask them another time. And if they lied to me, I would go to Carlisle and Esme. They would tell me. I was sure of that. It is in my best interest to know when I am surrounded by extra danger. I was a magnet for it after all. I should be aware of what I am pulling towards myself, should I not?
I dropped it for now though. Edward walked me back to the dinning room where there was a plate of spaghetti and meatballs for me with a glass of milk. I ate hungrily and when I was done Alice took my dish away before I could even get out of my chair.
We decided that we would just stay in the living room then and read. I was not sure when I had fallen back to sleep but I managed to wake up in the middle of the night in Edward's bed. He smiled down at me and I snuggled back into him. I quickly jumped back up and looked at the clock on his bedside table.
"Oh my God, it is 10:15. I need to get home. Charlie is probably freaking out."
"Alice called him earlier when you fell asleep. She told him that we wore you out and you fell asleep. He said that it was alright for you to stay the night again. He will see you when he gets home from work tomorrow."
I smiled as I went back to snuggling into his side. As I fell back to sleep to the sound of Edward humming my lullaby. I was momentarily reminded of Edward and Alice's little scene in the kitchen. I pushed it to the back of my mind for now, but it would not be forgotten.