Chapter Four: Miss Me

"I'm sorry." Alison finally said it. Outright.

"For what you did to me or for yourself?" Paige sounded angry but didn't care. This was about Alison giving a sincere apology for starting the war to begin with.

"All of it." Alison explained.

Paige looked towards Emily, who just looked uncomfortable. Paige shook her head again at Alison thanking Emily for being their mutual friend. Emily would never be just a friend to Paige. Not after months of dating.

"Okay Alison." Paige said hoarsely. Being in the same room without fighting was about the most either of them could hope for. She nodded to signal the conversation was over and left the room.

After a moment Emily came down the hallway.

"Paige wait." She said softly, almost afraid to touch the retreating girl in case she was still mad. She knew she couldn't ask for Alison and Paige to be friends, but she didn't think this counted as a successful peer consultation.

"That's it Emily. That's all I can do. Don't ask me to go back in there." Paige's voice was raw with tears, residual anger, and exhaustion.

"I wasn't going to. I'm really proud of you for doing that. I don't like seeing you hurt or upset. Even if we're not…" Emily trailed off, but Paige nodded in understanding. It still ached to hear Emily call her a friend, but she kept trying to assure herself that it was all they could be at this point.

"Sydney invited me to the Frozen singalong tonight…would you like to come?" Emily clasped her hands and looked down as she waited for Paige to answer.

"Okay. What time?" Paige asked. Emily smiled a bit, meeting Paige's eyes. Not a date, just as friends, Paige reminded herself.

"Meet us at school at seven."

"Just the three of us right? I'm not…" Paige's voice cracked, "I'm not ready to be buddies with Alison." Emily looked slightly defeated, but forced her smile not to fade.

"Of course. Just the three of us." Emily reassured. It was probably for the best. Being in the same room as Alison and Paige had been trying.

Paige tried to ignore Bridget Wu when she saw the girl in line for tickets to the singalong.

"Paige…Paige!" Bridget slurred, trying to get the girl's attention. Paige sighed, realizing she couldn't ignore Bridget. Bridget was the Venus fly trap of gossip. She would pull you in with something enticing, but then pump you for information once she had you ensnared. And because Paige had no Poker face, Bridget could pretty much infer whatever juice she wanted from Paige's expression alone.

"Yeah Bridget?" Paige asked. Now she had done it.

"You and Fields are over right?" Paige's body flushed with an almost arthritic stab of emotional pain.

"Uh yes. We broke up." Paige said in a hoarse voice. It still hurt to repeatedly tell people.

"Well just so you know, between us. Sarah Feldman is single…and she is totally into you." Bridget winked to emphasize her point. Paige knew Sarah. She was a blonde girl in her English class with a beautiful smile. Paige hadn't even known she was gay.

"Oh well…I'm not ready…I mean I'm flattered. I didn't even know she was gay." Paige finally fumbled out the words.

"Oh just letting you know. And also…I saw Jenna Marshalls in town today. She must be back to recover." Bridget said somewhat somberly but certainly not soberly.

"Recover?" Paige asked, confused.

"Yeah you didn't hear? Shana Fring died! And Jenna was supposedly dating her."

"No…I didn't realize that." Most of the time Shana had been around Paige, she had been working to undermine her relationship with Emily. She hadn't realized Jenna and Shana were involved. She also didn't realize Jenna was into girls.

"So do you think Alison is sincere about apologizing to us? To everyone?" Bridget took a sip from a flask she tucked back into her purse. But Paige could hear a faint note of earnestness in Bridget's voice. She actually wanted to know for herself, not just to get another piece of gossip.

"I…I don't know yet." Paige responded.

"So are you Anna or Elsa?" Paige looked at Emily, trying to will her heart to stop pounding hard in nervous optimism. This is not a date, this is not a date, Paige repeated in her head. An important mantra.

"…I'm humming." Emily said with a smile as they walked inside.

There was something about the way Paige had just looked at her…Emily wasn't sure if she needed to manage Paige's expectations or her own. It wasn't like she could just shut off her feelings for Paige.

Sydney rushed down the aisle, grabbing the best seats she could towards the front and center. Emily was going to sit in the middle then.

As soon as the house lights went off, Paige could feel her body trying to lean close to Emily's. And Emily was angled slightly towards her.

By the middle of the singalong, Paige and Emily's hands had found each other. At first they just pretended their fingers weren't touching. Then for the last song, their pinky and ring fingers began to tentatively graze each other. A slow, subtle movement that they wouldn't dare speak of for fear of ruining it.

Even when Sydney turned to say something, she noticed it and kept her comment to herself. Good for them, she thought.

Maybe someday…Paige thought.

"Maybe Mona deserved it…but you went out of your way to lie to us. Again." Emily said. She led the start to leave Ali behind in the bathroom.

The others dispersed to go to class, but Spencer circled back to the lunchroom. She was relieved to still see Paige sitting there, talking softly with Lucas and Sydney.

"What do you want Spencer?" Lucas asked, anger in his voice. Spencer started to respond to him but thought better of it. He was just lost, twisted to think whatever Mona wanted him to. Paige held up a hand to silence Lucas anyway, hopping down from the table they were sitting on to walk over to Spencer away from earshot of the others.

"Can I help you?" Paige asked in a low voice. Spencer searched Paige's eyes, trying to find the gentle soul she had encountered days earlier.

"Paige…I'm sorry I didn't listen to you when you came to my house the other night." Spencer hoped Paige would come around and open up to her. Paige folded her arms over her chest.

"This is so typical of you guys. Following her around again even though you are all so much better than this. Emily actually had Alison and me talk the other night. And then Emily…we…I thought for a second she was regretting leaving me." Paige looked wistful for a moment, remembering. "But now it is back to how it was freshman year with the five of you. No room for all the people you ridiculed." Spencer was surprised to hear something might have almost happened with Paige and Emily again. Not after Emily was already starting to act the same old way around Alison.

Spencer believed Paige deserved better.

"Paige please…" Spencer wanted, needed Paige to just listen. She needed to gain Paige's trust again. "I don't want things to be like they were back then. They can't be. And I'm going through something right now."

"It already feels that way. I'm sorry I can't do this right now." Paige said.

"Can't or won't?" Spencer asked, touching Paige's arm. She was surprised by how much she wanted Paige to forgive her. She didn't just want information…she felt bad for being complicit in something that hurt the other girl. "Paige…you're better than this."

Spencer's hand was still holding Paige's arm. Paige looked down at Spencer's hand, then over at Sydney watching the interaction, so she stepped away from Spencer's touch, leaving Spencer's stomach full of confused knots and dread.

"So are you Spencer. I…just give me some time, okay? I have to figure some stuff out." Paige said, her earnest brown eyes making Spencer feel a little better as Paige walked away.

Spencer sat in Toby's truck. She had just told him everything about New York.

"Are you mad at me for waiting so long to tell you?"

He wasn't. She had screwed up royally with Paige, basically shoved her into Mona's army…but Toby didn't bat an eye at her revelation. She leaned back into his arms, trying to seek the comfort she desperately craved. Finally she turned to kiss him, deciding it was best to not talk anymore anyway. She was so tired of talking.

Hanna tried to pay attention to the news report, but her eyes caught Alison and Emily holding hands tightly. Go figure this would start up again, she thought.

"Are they together now?" Hanna whispered, asking Spencer since she was the closest.

Spencer leaned back and responded with a question, "Have you been drinking?" Spencer could smell the beer on Hanna's breath. But then she looked over.

Sure enough, Emily and Alison's hand were entwined. Spencer rolled her eyes. Not this again. Especially with what Paige had said earlier. They were just proving her right…they were reverting back to their old selves. And Spencer didn't want that. She couldn't be the Spencer she was anymore.

Then the window shattered as something exploded outside.

Again, THANK YOU for the reviews, favorites, and follows. They are always such a nice way to show support and help me stay on track. I know you guys are probably getting frustrated with these chapters; I can promise this is the last one that sticks very close to the show. I needed to set the scene before diving into more original writing. Starting in the next chapter Spencer and Paige's interactions will start to drastically differ from the canon. I hope to have it up somewhat soon.