Thanks for all the reviews!

Eli was being a jerk… wasn't he?

Special thanks for a certain reviewer who had the funniest sentence in their review. I used it, and see if you can find it!

And here's the next chapter!

-x-

"Come on Clare? That's all that you were freaking out about? And here I thought that you had some major problems…"

Alli was sitting with me in the cafeteria. Alli was rolling her eyes at me while I had more fun poking and prodding what seemed to be meatloaf.

"You do know that that meatloaf won't disappear no matter how many times you poke it, right?"

"He's just so… ERGH! And I just get so… ARGH!" I was so angry at him. My face was flushed.

"So you have a crush on him… no big."

I stabbed the meatloaf. "I do not have a crush on him. He just makes me mad."

Alli stood up to leave. "Next time you have a real problem—a real problem—call me."

I sat in my seat staring at the dead meatloaf, pretending that was Eli's head.

-x-

"So Clare… what was your greatest experience?"

I looked up. It was Eli. At this point, I don't even want to talk to him. I don't even want to see his face.

"Aw… you're looking at me like that. Don't be so angry at me. You look like you like you want to 'suffocate me with marshmallows and force me to eat carrots for the rest of my life.' How cruel of you! That really does hurt."

I looked at Eli. How could he be joking around like that? I got in trouble because of him.

"So you're still giving me the cold shoulder. Nice Clare… way to be mature." He smirked jokingly.

I walked away from him. There's so many things I could say to him, directly to his face. But why was I so afraid?

-x-

After school, I got a text from my mom.

Clare, could you come home quickly? I need to talk to you. Love you, mom.

Crap. What could it be now?

I walked home as fast as I could. If she needed to text me, it had to be serious. Forget Eli, my family comes first.

-x-

"Mom, what's the problem?" I stormed through the door, completely sweaty and beat.

"Clare… I don't know how to tell you…"

Oh god. This is the moment that I've been dreading. She's going to tell me that she's lost her job. She's going to tell me that she found out about dad's new girlfriend.

"Grandma died this morning."

My eyes widened. Grandma died?

"Clare, I know how you must feel right now… you loved Grandma so much!" She came over to hug me and I awkwardly returned the hug. What could make this even worse?

"Your father and I will be out tonight to meet with the rest of the family to schedule and prepare the wake. Dinner is in the refrigerator; just heat it up whenever you're hungry." She walked out of the door.

"Wait!" I stopped her. "Where's dad?"

"He said that he'll come later. He had some more work to do or something." She sauntered over to her car. "I'll see you later tonight, okay sweetheart?"

I nodded. I bet that he was going to have a make out session with his girlfriend before heading out to meet the family.

-x-

I looked in the living room for one of the family albums. It had pictures of me, Darcy and Grandma.

When I was younger, I used to spend all my weekends with Grandma; we would go out for ice cream on Sunday mornings after Mass and play in the creek every afternoon. On Saturdays, Grandma would make us a picnic with delicious tuna fish sandwiches and ice cold lemonade.

Everything changed after she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. She started forgetting everyone's names. She insisted that she was okay, but I didn't understand how the name 'Clare' could turn into 'Nancy' or 'Betsy.' When I started seventh grade, Grandma moved to the nursing home thirty minutes away. I used to visit her all the time, until I realized that she forgot me entirely.

I looked at all the pictures, flipping page after page after page. This was definitely better than going shopping or doing homework. I started remembering playing at the creek and drinking lemonade.

Grandma used to have the best stories. She used to tell me and Darcy about pirates and fairy tales. My favorite story was about the little girl who became a mermaid. I always wished that one day I could swim with the fishes and dolphins.

I remembered when I was little and I was walking in the creek. One time I went through a deep area, where the water levels were higher and the current was faster, and I started drowning. The cold water enveloped my body and gave me a shock. It was one of the most amazing things ever. I was only four or five, but I remember looking at all the little fishes swimming around me, the brown dirty water and everyone screaming my name, telling me to come out of the water.

But I didn't want to. It was too amazing.

It was one of the greatest experiences that I've ever had.

Drowning in a creek. And Eli read about it.

-x-

If I could be a mermaid, I would.

To forget about everything and everyone on earth, jump into water and start swimming. I would do that.

I want to forget about my mom, my dad and everyone else in this world. I wanted to jump into the deep part of the creek once more; to be in the middle between the surface world and some sort of bottomless pit.

And I would stay there. I would stay in the water. Even if I had no more oxygen left in me.

-x-

The wake was scheduled to be next Wednesday night. The actual funeral service would be on Thursday morning. I was given permission to skip school.

I didn't care about how people at school looked at me when I walked down the halls anymore. I didn't care about people talking about me. I didn't care about my friends anymore.

I felt different. Like I was no longer the same Clare that got up in the cafeteria and sang hymns. I was no longer the Clare that wore a Catholic school uniform. I was no longer me.

I was a different me.

I had no proclivity to impress people; I had no inclination to talk to anyone. And it was okay.

-x-

Um… I actually pictured this chapter being different. But yet… it turned out being this?

I hope you enjoy it. Please read and review! Reviews give me more energy to write.

NEVER HAVE I EVER UPDATED THIS OFTEN. But doing this is actually really fun!

But yeah. Enjoy, don't flame the grammar! I kinda just finished this now and I'm not in the mood for editing grammar… But whatevers.