Wishing on a Star
Chapter 4 – Facing the world
Ruth idly stirred her coffee, her mind firmly fixed on her relationship with Jay. The more time she spent with him the more she wanted let the world see that she was happy, that life was finally getting good and that she loved Jay. Confessing to Maryam that they were a couple once more the day before had only strengthened Ruth's want to let the world know. However with the exposure of their relationship would make it more official and would bring the gossip something Ruth hated. Lost in her thoughts she didn't notice that she had been stirring the same cup of coffee for the last five minutes as she debated the pros and cons of not hiding her relationship or the fact that Charlie had walked into the staffroom behind her.
"Something on your mind?"
His comment snapped her from her trance and she took the spoon from the coffee and placed it in the sink.
"Not really." She shrugged
"Are you sure about that?" Charlie asked he had spent quite a lot of time with the young doctor during her time in the psychiatric unit and had gotten to know when something was playing on her mind "I always have a spare ear or two if you need to talk about something." He said kindly
"I'm just debating something, it's nothing really…" Ruth shook her head slightly. Ruth had learnt to share her feelings during her stay in the psych ward and she had also learnt to trust and respect Charlie but that didn't stop her flinging her defences up when faced with a conversation with someone even Jay.
"Are you getting on ok with the work load?" Charlie enquired off-handedly "You seemed a little nervous yesterday in resus." He stated honestly
"Yes." She replied immediately before sighing slightly "Well I'm still a bit wary I might do something wrong but I am trying to get my confidence back" She confessed letting her defences down slightly "Not that it is work that is distracting me." She added simply
"You are capable of treating every patient that walks through those doors Ruth, you are a good doctor you just need to believe in yourself." Charlie reassured her "Don't tell me the reason you're staring off into space and over-stirring your coffee comes in the form of a certain dark curly haired nurse?"
"How…?" Ruth started blushing almost as red as the stethoscope hanging around her shoulders
"I see the way he looks at you." Charlie smiled slightly "He really cares about you."
"I know." Ruth was unable to contain the smile that was slowly spreading across her face "Part of me wants to tell the world but part of me is scared about making it official and about being gossiped about."
"Are you happy?" Charlie said simply
"Yes." Ruth nodded immediately
"Well then I'd say it's something to celebrate not something to hide away or be scared of." Charlie smiled "People will always gossip in this department but does that they say really matter?"
"No I guess not." Ruth nodded with a smile creeping across her face
""You've both had a tough year I'm glad that you've sorted things out, it's nice to see you happy." Charlie commented
"It's nice to be happy." Ruth commented shyly as the staffroom door opened and Scarlett walked in "Thanks Charlie."
"Anytime Ruth." Charlie nodded
Charlie was right Ruth smiled as she sipped her coffee, this relationship was something to celebrate, the positive outcome of a tough year. She should stop worrying and get on with it and be happy. She didn't think she would be standing up and making an announcement to the world but if people saw they were together wouldn't be a total disaster. It was not a bad thing to be in a relationship. It was not a bad thing to be happy.
It was a rather shocked Jay who received a kiss on the cheek when he arrived at work half an hour later.
"What was that for?" Jay asked as Ruth blushed noticing Zoe and Dylan looking in their direction.
"Good morning to you too." Ruth smiled
"You're chirpy this morning, someone spike your coffee?" Jay commented and Ruth placed her patient's notes on the counter, he leaned closer "I thought you wanted us to say secret…"
"I decided something's need to be celebrated not ignored…" She said simply "I'm not making an announcement but why is it anyone's business if we are happy? We are Happy aren't we?" she added cautiously
"Very." Jay smiled "I'm happy with whatever you are happy with." He said resting his hand on hers and squeezing it gently.
"I'm more than happy." Ruth confessed.
"Then I am more than happy too." Jay smiled back "But I better get my scrubs on before I get lynched!" Ruth laughed as he vanished in the direction of the staffroom
"That was sickening." Dylan's comment drifted across from the other side of the nurse's station and Zoe smacked him with a patient's notes offering Ruth a friendly smile.
"Back together then?" Lenny asked bluntly
"Yeah, we are." Ruth smiled picking up her patients notes and heading off to cubicles with a tingly happy feeling in her stomach deciding things really couldn't get any better.