Halo 4 Screwed Up Version

Chapter 3: Forerunners Are Supposed To Be Dead

Hello and welcome back to the story

p.s. no more reviews? God dammit people what do I have to do to get you guys to laugh

p.p.s. sorry it took so long

Chief and Bitch teleported some the fuck where.

Oh yeah!

Their in the middle of the planet.

dsakjfkasfkakfldhkfhaslkdfja...oh sorry.

I was board.

Anyways, Chief questioned, "What the hell were those things?"

Cortana replies, "Some sort of advanced defense AIs.

Related to the Sentinels, I'm guessing, but it's hard to say without a closer look."

Chief said out of the blue, "I want one. I want it to be named Bob."

Cortana was like Da faq bro.

Chief entered a platform inside Requiem's core and a hollow sphere of gigantic proportions whatever the hell that means.

Chief walked to the console and inserted that dick, I mean Cortana.

Chief questioned, "Where is Outfinity?"

She replies, "This Requiem's Core all right, but Outfinity is not here."

Well duh their outside of the planet.

Cortana points at a hologram, "That satellite in the center is amplifying the ship's broadcasts like a relay."

Chief answers, "Can we call them."

Cortana replies, "Well those beams that are connected to the satellite is creating an interference so we can't contact them."

Chief got pissed.

"Okay I'm opening you a portal to the first pylon." said Cortana.

Chief pulled her out of the console and inserted her back into his helmet.

Chief went through the portal and appeared in a hallway.

Chief questioned, "Is the first pylon?"

Cortana started laughing, "Fuck no! You think that I would make this easy for you."

Chief pulled out Cortana's chip, threw it on the ground, and crushed it.

Then like on GTA (Grand Theft Auto) it said "Wasted" like you died or something.

Just kidding!

Chief is too much of a pussy to kill that bitch, but she did make chief teleport far away from the first pylon.

Chief got pissed (lol like he already is).

Chief saw these four legged creatures and then they ran off.

"God dammit" said Chief.

Chief keeps walking and then those four legged creatures come back and start shooting at Chief.

Chief killed them and said, "You see Cortana this is why we can't be friends."

She questioned, "Why is that?"

"Because you don't help me or give me any advice on what to do."

Cortana yelled, "I'VE BEEN HELPING YOU SINCE WE DISCOVERED DAHALO!"

"Yeah...but I'm starting to miss your annoyance."

Cortana blushed, "Aww that's sweet."

Then Chief said, "Can it bitch!"

"Asshole!"

Minutes later.

Chief found a button and pressed it (retarded laugh: hahahaahahha).

After when Chief walked across the bridge or light bridge, God its just a mother fucking bridge.

A random "thing" jumped right on chief...you know what SPOILER ALERT it's a Promethean knight.

It roared in his face.

Chief put one hand on his face and pulled out some tic-tacs and threw them at the knight.

"Damn you need a breath mint."

Then the knight teleported away.

Hours later.

Chief took out the two pylons after going through Prometheans and Covenant fighting for no reason what so ever.

By the way a lot of static from Outfinity, but we don't give a fuck now don't we.

Chief when through another portal.

Chief couldn't believe it...he saw the Halo: Nightfall coming to a theater near you (jk lol).

Chief saw a random ball in the middle and of course the two species fighting each other.

He made it to the pillars and put his hand on it (that's gay).

He questioned, "Outfinity! This is Sierra-117 of the UNSC Backward Unto Dusk. Do you copy?"

The random ball thing mocked Chief and it sounded distorted.

The Sphere rose and Cortana told chief to let go of the two pillars and this and that and fuck.

Chief said, "Find us and exit."

Cortana replied, "Don't wait on my account..."

By the way the nut (ball) is called Cryptum.

A thing came out of the Cryptum ship (this is getting very gay).

Hey it's a forerunner and his name is Didact.

Supposedly the Didact waved his hand around and the Prometheans (which are now fucking robots) went from blue to orange.

Chief was being held up by the Didact by some gravitational shit with his hand.

Didact said to chief with no fucking care in the world, "This tomb is now yours."

He threw chief at a wall and he fell to the floor.

Then there was a slipspace rupture and OMG SO MUCH ORANGE.

After like five minutes of Cortana trying to wake Chief up he finally woke up after getting knocked the fuck out.

Chief grabbed a ghost went through a portal.

After he went through with the ghost he almost fell off a cliff (dammit).

He's see's a big giant ship.

It's Outfinity, and after skipping a lot of shit about them founding the fucking hole that led into the planet, who cares.

The captain of the ship who is Del Rio said, "Mayday! Mayday! This is the captain of the UNSC Outfinity. Unknown entity has seized control of our ship! We're without power, and on a collision course with an unidentified Forerunner planet!"

Chief told Cortana to track its decent.

Cortana replied, "Marking. Impact predicted 77.8 kilometers due north." (damn how did I remember that)

Cryptum rose below the cliff edge, and followed Outfinity.

Cortana says, "You know where he's heading..."

Chief replies annoyed, "Yup and I have to follow it."

Then Chief kept walking and ran into the camera man.

This was a long one *coughs* that's what she said. Thanks for reading! :DDDDDDDDDD