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Chapter Four: Boundaries

"We're less than an hour away now, Miss."

Hitomi jerked upwards from where she had slumped slightly in her seat. The wagon they were traveling in puttered along slowly, creating a gentle swaying motion. She must have dozed off because the last thing she remembered was the driver saying it was three more hours until they reached the city.

Hitomi leaned against the back of her seat heavily. Less than an hour until she met Van again. They'd left early in the morning, Cain riding on a horse and she seated in this wagon which carried some traded goods from Arzas. Hours had gone by she knew, but it certainly didn't feel that way. Why was it that whenever she dreaded something, it always seemed to creep up on her that much faster?

The problem was she didn't know what to tell Van anymore. Hitomi had barely slept the night before and she was still no closer to a solution. Was what Cain said the truth? Should she tell Van about Daichi or would that be selfish and unfeeling of her? Would she only hurt Van in the end? Endless possibilities fluttered about in her mind, and the answer always seemed just out of reach.

At least Cain had left her alone to think about what she would do. In fact, she hadn't talked to him since the night before. He'd just been silently riding on his horse ahead of the wagon.

Wait…

Hitomi sat up as trepidation crept over her. She looked up at the driver, an old man with wrinkled lines on his face that attested to a life long lived. "Where's Cain? The last time I remember, he was riding just in front of us."

The driver responded in a crackly voice, "The master went on ahead about ten minutes ago. He probably needs to tell the king about your situation and all, Miss."

Yeah, right! And pigs could fly! Cain obviously wanted her to keep the truth about Daichi a secret. Whatever she would decide to tell Van, she needed to talk to him freely without Cain's interference.

She leaned towards the driver, her eyes pleading. "Please, could we move faster to catch up with him?"

The man shifted in his seat. "I don't know 'bout that. Master Cain said to keep our pace as such."

"Please. I…I have to get to him. Please."

The driver was silent for a moment as he scratched at the back of his head. "Ah, Miss. This old man can't take yer sad face and all. I'll speed things up, don't you worry."

"Thank you."

Hitomi stared hard at the horizon, aware that every second drew her closer to the castle. And closer to Van.

Van collapsed into the chair with a heavy sigh. His meetings with the Council of Elders always seemed to tire him out. And it wasn't as though he was in the best shape today, what with the news he'd received early that morning.

Hitomi was back.

He could hardly contain himself at all during the meeting. Hitomi and Cain could arrive at the castle at any time. It took all his effort not to simply ride out and meet them halfway just so he could see her sooner.

Leaning his head back over the chair, he was glad he at least had this room as an escape. It had been his mother's parlor, and was one of the first places he'd had rebuilt. It always seemed to calm him being here, as though her soothing presence was still in the room. He was grateful for such peace offered in situations like the one he faced now.

A loud knock resounded on the door and Van suppressed a groan. It seemed never ending today.

Van stretched his arms over his head as he approached the door. Straightening his shoulders, he opened it. And his heart felt as though it skipped a beat.

"Cain! Is Hitomi-"

"She's on her way. I expect she'll be here within the hour." Cain stepped into the room and bowed. "It's good to see you, Van-sama."

Van flushed a bit. He'd forgotten to even greet Cain. "Yes, you too Cain. I'm sorry if I seem a little out of it. I'm just…Was she okay?"

"She is fine, but she suffered a head injury last night. Apparently she and her son were attacked by some woman on the Mystic Moon yesterday. The boy was taken from her and brought to Gaea. She's asked for Fanelia's help."

"Yes. Yes, of course we'll help look for her…son." The word seemed out of place on his lips. Van walked away from Cain to look out the window. There was a strange weight on his chest all of a sudden.

Cain's voice remained controlled. "She came back here only for the child. She'll probably return once he's been found."

Van shut his eyes. "I know." He'd been stupid to hope. Stupid to dream. But he couldn't stop it. He couldn't stop this feeling like a part of him had been ripped out and scattered in the wind. He couldn't stop loving her, even though she had another life on the Mystic Moon.

"Van-sama, I'm sure we could send her to Asturia. They would gladly lend aid to the girl."

"No," Van turned, his eyes commanding and his tone resolute. "I won't abandon her when she needs me."

"This will only bring you heartache! She's put Gaea and you behind her. It would be easier-"

"Enough." The pain and sadness in one word was enough to squash the protest. "Enough, Cain. It doesn't…It doesn't matter if she's forgotten me. I'll still help her in any way possible and that's final. Don't ask me to stop the way I feel."

"Forgive me, Van-sama. I'm only looking out for your best interests."

Van was silent and gazed out the window once again. Cain cleared his throat. "Don't forget that you-"

Another knock on the door interrupted their conversation, and a loud voice filtered into the room. "Umm…Van-sama, I think you should open the door!"

Unable to identify the voice, Van strode forward to allow the speaker access. A guard from the outer gate stood before him looking almost sheepish. "What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry to intrude, sir, because I know Cain-sama said not to interrupt, but she insisted on coming right away."

Soft footsteps sounded behind the guard before a woman materialized just behind him slightly out of breath. "Why are you running so fast? I almost…lost…you…"

Her voice trailed off to a quiet murmur as she locked eyes with him. Van had stopped breathing for a moment as he stared into the face that had only bordered on dreams and visions for five years. Her face was older, more graceful he thought, and her honey hair just a bit longer. But her eyes were the same bright color, so full of emotion.

"Hitomi…" His voice cracked a bit, but he couldn't help it. He moved closer to her and laid a hand on her cheek. She was real. She wasn't a dream or a memory. She was really in front of him.

Eyes brimming with tears, she brought her own hand to cover his. "I'm here."

It took Van a moment to realize Cain was speaking to the guard, giving him permission to leave. He slowly backed away from Hitomi to let her into the parlor and she sat down on one of the couches. His hand tingled, still warm from the contact.

"Well, I'm glad you've arrived in such good time." Cain said as he cleared his throat.

Hitomi responded lightly, but Van was surprised to hear an edge of sarcasm in her tone. "Oh…Yes, thank you for all your help."

"I've explained the situation to Van-sama. That you're here to look for your son."

"You…You should have…I mean, you-" Hitomi stuttered, flustered for some reason.

Van regarded Cain with suspicion. Something was up. There definitely seemed to be an undercurrent between the two that he wasn't privy to. And it wasn't a friendly one.

"Cain, I want to speak with her alone."

"But Van-sama-"

"Now, Cain." Van's voice was hard.

Cain's lips tightened to a thin line as he moved to exit the room. Before leaving he turned, saying pointedly to Van, "I also meant to remind you of the meeting regarding your marriage. Just making sure you remember, Van-sama." He bowed again to them. "Good day to you both."

Van frowned in anger. Why did Cain have to bring that up now, especially in front of Hitomi? He sat down across from her, all too aware that she was avoiding his gaze now. There was only a small table between them, but it seemed much more separated them. An uncomfortable silence stretched between the two. She fidgeted after a few moments and his eyes fell on the bandages on her head.

"Does it hurt? Cain told me how you were attacked."

She finally brought her eyes to meet his. They seemed very anxious. "It's okay I guess. I get a headache now and again, but I was hit pretty hard. The woman who hit me…Van, she had wings."

"What?" Van replied in surprise. "Did you recognize her at all?"

"No, I've never seen her before." Hitomi hands clenched tightly in her lap. "I couldn't stop her. I couldn't do anything! I was useless. She took Daichi from me so easily."

She sounded so alone, so broken, that Van wanted to pull her to him. "I'll find him, Hitomi. We'll get him back."

"Van…" She opened her mouth a few times, but seemed unsure of whether or not to say something. She resumed her fidgeting once again, hands still clenched.

Daichi. So that was the boy's name. Was he named after the father? He felt his own hands tighten. He quickly ran them through his hair. He needed to keep calm, not become jealous. Hitomi had obviously already made her choice and there was nothing he could do about it.

"Are you really getting married?"

Hitomi blurted the question out so quickly that he blinked in surprise. She was red as though embarrassed, but she still waited resolutely for his response.

"…Yes." He answered stiffly. "It will bring peace to Fanelia."

"I-I see."

The way she it said made Van frown. It had sounded almost…resentful. Why would she be upset over such news? It was she who'd moved on after all. A part of him that had festered on that fact, on the idea that she loved another man seemingly so easily, rose up in him. It was an ugly feeling, irrational and both bitter and angry. He had long since tried to suppress such a feeling, yet it pushed at him now.

"The father must be worried about you and your son."

"What? It's not-" Stuttering again, she was acting taken aback for some reason. That feeling was creeping on him more and more…

"You don't have to explain. I know about that man with dark hair. The one who looks like Allen."

"What? Amano? It's not like that."

"Don't try and spare me, Hitomi. I've seen you with him in an image casting. So I know you've already moved on."

Hitomi shot up from the couch then, her eyes flashing dangerously. "You're the one getting married, Van! So don't you dare take the moral high ground with me!"

He stood as well, the air sizzling with two tempers. Resentment, frustration, pain, anger. They'd been brewing in him for weeks and they poured out of his mouth in caustic words as if against his own will. "You're the one with a child already! It was just so easy for you to forget everything, wasn't it? How long did it take? A day? A week?"

A crack echoed in the parlor as her slap connected with his face. Her voice trembled, her face a mask of pain. "You don't know anything, Van."

She ran from the room, the door thudding shut.

Van stood still, feeling sick to his stomach. How could he have said those things to her? How?! He'd let some monster filled with jealously rule him and what had he accomplished?

Her face before she fled entered his mind and he slammed a fist into the wall. "Damn it!"

He could feel bruises forming on his knuckles, but he grimly acknowledged it.

He deserved it for what he'd just done.

"B…Bu…"

A tiny hand, small enough to fit into her own, pointed determinately into the sky. Hitomi sat down next to her child as he lay on the grass. "What is it Dai-chan? What do you see, sweetie?"

"Bu…Bunny!"

Hitomi let out a small squeal of joy as she scooped the boy into her arms. She hadn't expected a real answer, just more baby jargon. Instead, she'd gotten Daichi's first word. Feeling a mixture of glee and pride while she glanced up at the clouds, she too could see a shape that resembled a rabbit.

"Yes, Daichi," She whispered gently into his ear. "It's a bunny."

Daichi stretched his arms up to her, his little hands dancing in her hair. "Bunny! Bunny!"

The memory seemed as tangible as ever to Hitomi as she looked up at the sky in Fanelia. The sound of a fountain trickled its magic behind her as she sat on a bench. She was the only one in the small courtyard and she was grateful for it. It had been three days since she'd come to the castle. Three days since her awful fight with Van. She hadn't spoken with or even seen him since then. And there'd been no word from anyone about Daichi. Not a single clue!

She rubbed her foot in aggravation over a slippery puddle where some water from the fountain had pooled out. Everything was wrong. Daichi missing. She and Van not even talking.

Oh, why had she lost her temper and gone and slapped him?! Granted, he shouldn't have said some things either, but she hadn't given him a reason not to after all. She hadn't told him the truth. He'd seemed so angry and hurt by the idea that Daichi's father was someone else. There'd been murmur of hope within her at that thought. A hope that he still loved her. Maybe he wasn't over her like Cain made it out to be. But still...he was getting married. For peace he'd said. Who was she to trample on that because of her own selfishness?

But I love him so much it's hurting me.

It was a sharper pain than when they were separated between two worlds. Now that they were only minutes away, it seemed there were more boundaries between them. She ached at the thought. It was an ache that hadn't gone away ever since she'd arrived. She couldn't get Van out of her mind either, so it was a constant sore.

She rubbed her hands vigorously over her face, but paused as she heard something. Footsteps echoed down the hallway and came to a stop just at the courtyard's entryway.

She kept her hands over her face, silently pleading that whoever it was could take a hint. She needed to be alone now to think. She felt so tired all of a sudden.

"Hitomi?" Her pulse quickening, Hitomi lowered her hands to look back at Van. He stood at the edge of the courtyard, his face troubled. "Can I talk to you?"

"O-Of course!"

She moved to rise, but Van held up a hand. "No, you can stay seated."

Hitomi settled back on the bench and shuffled over to give a space to him. He inhaled deeply before finally entering the courtyard. Hitomi's palms felt sweaty and her throat oddly dry. Each stride he took seemed in slow motion as different possibilities ran through her mind about what he wanted to talk about. The pessimist in her seemed to permeate her thoughts. Maybe he wanted her to leave. Maybe he didn't want to look for Daichi anymore.

Maybe he would say he hated her.

Fervently pushing that idea out of her mind, Hitomi focused her attention back on Van. Except at the exact moment she did so, Van's foot hit one of the puddles of water by the fountain. She had no time to warn him before his weight shifted precariously. His arms flailing wildly, Hitomi watched as the King of Fanelia toppled directly into the fountain.

Hitomi whirled and bent over the bench. "Van! Are you okay?"

He came up sputtering, hair spilling over his face and coughed lightly. He looked completely comical and somehow adorable all at the same time. A bubble of mirth formed in her and Hitomi couldn't help the laughter that escaped.

"Oh, Van, I don't mean to laugh at you, but…I just didn't expect…" Still laughing, she moved to help pull him up. "Here, let's get you up."

She clasped both his hands and he emerged from the fountain wet, dripping, and red in the face. "That wasn't exactly what I had planned."

She looked up at him in amusement. "It feels like ages since I've laughed so much though."

He paused before smiling softly. "I'm glad I fell then."

She suddenly realized they were still holding hands. Backing away nervously, her hands felt cold once she released his. Silence filled the courtyard. Hitomi was about to ask him what he wanted to talk about when he finally spoke.

"I'm sorry." He ran a hand through wet hair, his face aggrieved. "I'm sorry, Hitomi. Those things I said yesterday…I was angry, but I was wrong to say them."

Relief spread over her. "Van…I was wrong too. I shouldn't have hit you. I guess...I don't know. I guess my temper gets away with me too often."

And I have so much more I really want to tell you.

His look of relief mirrored her own as she observed his face critically. "Did I hurt you?"

"No," he said as he idly rubbed his cheek. "Besides, you hit too much like a girl, Hitomi."

His face looked mortified then as he started stammering, "No! I mean—I didn't mean it like that! I was only-"

But Hitomi felt that amusement springing forth once again at his bluntness. She grinned at him, "Would you like me to try again?"

His brow furrowed in confusion before he saw her expression. Realizing she was teasing, he grinned in response. "I think I'll pass on that offer."

Her laughter echoing around them, Hitomi felt that murmur within her once again. A flicker of hope burned brighter.