A/N I deicided to make this completely AU after 5x13. No spoiler or what happened in actual GG was no longer integrated. And sorry for any typos/writing error, because I'm sure there's tons.
31th January,2012, The Empire
New York times, January 31th,2012
Runaway bride: Royal marriage was called off- Where's Blair Waldorf, former princess-to-be?
According to witnesses, the Bride stepped into the mysterious car and run away with unknown company. Some source reported it's Daniel Humphrey, the author of "Inside". Although this information is not confirmed yet.
Ritchie faced up from the newspaper he's currently reading. He can't still believe what happened yesterday in the church. There's overflow of photos in newspaper, magazines and Internets. Now everyone speak of newest juicy gossip about ruined wedding which just happened less than 24 hours ago. Chuck appeared from the living room, putting his mobile phone into the jacket. He opened the mouth.
"Louis announced the official statement about disengagement."
"He called off the wedding?"
"Apparently, yes. He has not too many options- since the Bride ran away. With the other man."
Ritchie didn't miss tiny shift of Chuck's expression when he noted the "the other man". He winced at the word shortly, then his expression was back to his normal one- poker face. It is like that he manages to hold himself from collapsing, or like hot lava peaked from cracks in the volcano's surface. He can even taste something bitter spreading out in his mouth. The other man, who was supposed to be Chuck. That was how the thing turned out, in the reality. The reality, in which Chuck's teenage children did time-warp to 18 years ago's Manhattan and known history was messed up, which may give serious damages to the future. In Ritchie's mind a dark thought crossed. What did happen in the Back to the future? From older siblings start to disappear, because their parents likely won't end up. He shook his head to erase the idea. It won't happen. Cate can't be disappeared just because they failed to fix the history at the first attempt, right? He changed the subject to cheer up his darkened mind.
"Have you heard anything of mom?"
"No. She's still missing. So is Humphrey."
"It's weird. People have camera and everything...some people must have reported their whereabouts by this time."
"If person really wanna go missing, there's nothing to prevent it. This world is huge. We're even not sure whether they're still in the State." Chuck recalled his last missing which ended up shoot in Europe. People can go missing, really.
"Without passport? Unlikely. I bet she's still somewhere not far from here."
Not to mention, some people don't need passport to get out. He deliberately ignored his comment.
"I hope...to find her before it's too late."
"Let your PI find her."
"I've done that."
An awkward silence filled the space between two. An end of conversation.
Suddenly, Cate broke in the conversation between two, as heavy atmosphere began dominating the room.
"Let's look at the bright side. We managed to crush the wedding. Now Blair is single again. No string attached."
"At least. Unless now she decided to hook up with Dan."
Chuck stated in sad tone. There were several times he suspected something between them, but this was a slap on his face. It hurts more than physical slap. Ritchie's eyes opened wide at his comment, looked very terrified.
"No, no, no...it won't happen. The only person mom loves is only you, and no one else. She's been in love with just one person in her life."
"The world you know and the reality we're in now different, unfortunately."
"That's... true, but still. Don't say you gave up on her. There's still way to fix this."
"I never say I give up. I'm just...upset. And exhausted. My brain doesn't work properly."
Chuck answered with black rings around his eyes. It's clear to everyone he hasn't slept well last night. To be accurate, no one of them have.
Then Chuck left the penthouse, using his errands as excuse. To be honest, he wanted to be alone. The thought of Blair and Dan running away together was too much to bear. Nate shook his head. Ritchie looked down. Cate starred the window, as if it's the most interesting thing in this world. The room was filled by dark atmosphere.
Cate stretched her hand to reach the teacup to sip the rest of content, anyway there's not much better things to do. But her grimace turned into horror when she failed to pick it up- then the fine teacup has fallen on the ground and shuttered into pieces, spilling its content. A warm liquid spread out throughout the area she's sitting, and it made a large stain on expensive rug. She froze at the spot.
"I'm sorry."
It seems all blood drew from her face. She sat still, gazing at the mess she just created. She clenched her teeth. Nate looked confused at her radical reaction. It was just a one of teacup and rug she just ruined. It's not like she broke something not replaceable.
"It's no problem. It's just a teacup. I'll make someone to clean her up."
She nodded without words at his words.
"Aren't you hurt? You look...upset. Let me see."
Nate tried to take her right hand, which is assumed hurt by sharp pieces of broken porcelain. Against Nate's reaction she sprang from his touch and hid her hand behind her back.
"No...it's fine. A water is too hot, so..."
Cate pasted weird smile on her face, insisting everything is just ok. Men exchanged a puzzled glance to each other, but not pushing harder than that. She's acting weird.
A room service was immediately called by Nate, and the mess was cleared away. Two men sat again on the sofa, and Cate replaced herself on the opposite single sofa of two. She kept sitting oddly silent in strange position, as if she has something to hide from them. Ritchie raised his eyebrow at his sister's strange behavior, but kept his mouth shut.
"So...what do we do now?"
"All we can do is just wait til PIs find some clues lead to Blair. Until then, we can still look for some places she may be- I don't know, Her apartment, Dan's loft, some hotels... But honestly, I have no idea. They're too obvious..."
He placed his hand under his chin to consider his options for today.
"Still, we can look for some places. Anyone coming with me?"
Nate suggested children. Cate shook her head.
"I'll pass...I'm feeling not good, You two go. I rather stay in bed today."
"But you are-"
She faced away from her brother's reproachful tone. Nate cut in.
"Alright. Ritchie?"
Ritchie cast a quick glace toward his sister to read her expression. She looks indeed not well, but it's something different from sickness. He briefly wondered why she was upset minutes ago. She waved her hand to urge him to go. As being pushed by her gesture, he finally stood up.
"I'm coming."
"Great."
Men left Empire. After she checked their figure disappeared completely from her sight, she stood up and went to the rooftop of Empire. She was repeatedly told it's one of her father's favorite place and the story attached to the place. She has been here several times in future, but she wanted to know how it looks like before. Chuck Bass has a thing for rooftop...the place always involves his emotion. Having too much emotion is an exact expression describes her right now. Unsorted emotions swirled in her confused head, which never occurred to her before, like sorrow, self-pity, anger and...desperation. Her desperation to cling her endangered life. She was also teenage girl, no matter what she has seen and experienced as she grew up in UES. She never forget the moment when she first saw empty space where her thumb should be. It was when she tried to pick up that damn teacup, then everything went as slow-motion. She tried to open the knob of the door to the rooftop by her right hand, after climbed the steps with gradually quickened heartbeat. She failed. Her face crumpled. She tried once again, but result was same-then she realized without the pressure of thumb finger it's hard to turn the knob. Finally she turned it by her left hand and proceeded to the rooftop. She closed the door behind her silently. Rooftop was empty, and it seems that panorama of Manhattan below her sorely belongs to her. Usually, it pleases her- today, it makes her just feel lonelier.
She held her right hand to the mild sunshine in the late January. She looked up her right hand once again. First half of her thumb fingers is invisible. The sun ray leaped through the space of her missing thumb finger to her face. She's disappearing. She closed her eyes against the brightness. She felt a tear stream down to her cheek, which was not caused by brightness. It's not about physical pain she feels now. She feels nothing, and it's worst. She wanted to feel the pain, if it is proof that she's still alive- or she still exists.
Her missing thumb finger told her that even they managed to crush the wedding, Blair's still not getting back to Chuck. Where is she? Their mission here was to fix the history- make their parents reunite. Time bomb started ticking, and there may be not much time left for them. How long does she hold?If they keep failing - Sooner or later, her brother tracks same route of her- for now, she's the one disappearing right now. Her brother is two years younger than her, after all. She decided it's too cruel to inform her naive brother about her "discovery". Who's willing to give dying declaration to someone you care?
Everything has its cost and you pay for it. Just because you failed once? Her mind screamed. There was too much things she didn't get it. The more she felt emotionally overwrought, the louder her beat became. Now She felt sensation of pulse on her ear. She placed back of her left hand above her heart. She felt like she's crying at warms of her heart and its strong vibration. Without thumb or not, it's beating. I may not whole anymore, but I'm still alive. She clenched her teeth so she won't burst into tears. Despite of her try, a sob escaped from her throat. I want to live, she kept saying to herself. I always get what I want, and I don't hesitate to fight for it. I'm Cate Bass. she repeated to herself, over and over, until her sob stopped. I never give up. She must be strong. It's not just about her life, but her brother's. And more, her parents- her whole family's. She reminded herself firmly.
1st Feb, 2012 Afternoon,Central Park
Nate and Ritchie are walking down the central park side by side. They paid a visit to several place where Blair might be, but as they've already predicted it ended effortless. Now tired two decided to have a rest in Central park, to "clear the mind". Nate got a bag of breads beforehand. They reached Duck pond.
They bent their body and start feeling the ducks. Nate muttered.
"Here used to be Blair's favorite place. We used to hang out here very often."
"I know. You told me before. You took me here with Cate when I was a small child."
That comment stopped Nate. It was the first time that Ritchie mentioned of future Nate in front of him. Nate stopped feeding briefly and turned his face to young boy, becoming slightly curious about future.
"So, in future how's Chuck and Blair?"
"Happily married, successful."
"No more drama between them?"
"No. I mean, nothing leads to divorce or something like that."
"I can't imagine."
"Don't you ask about yourself?"
"No. I'll save it for later. I feel like I've better not to ask. It's bit scary, to be honest."
Nate remembered the night of family reunion three years ago, when drunken Blair crushed the party and cried over her messed life. Knowing ending may his life easier, as Blair once insisted.
"I know. I'm scared to know what happens next. If dad and mom won't end up together? If dad gives up? If mom is too stupid to let him go? Or end up together with someone else? We can't control them. It's all up to them. And even mom won't recognize me."
"Chuck won't give up. I've seen what he has been doing for five years. Sure, he did many stupid things- you must've heard of them- but his love for Blair is real. Otherwise, she wouldn't choose him over me."
"I know, but- he's different who I knew. What I saw now is upset, confused Dad. He looks like clueless- as if he doesn't know what to do. It looks so out of character to me."
"He's also human. I don't know how he looks to you in the future, but he's not perfect... without your mother, he's always clueless. But he grew up, in a good way. That's for sure. "
Nate concluded.
"You may be right... I just, um, never saw him like that before. Chuck Bass I've known for my whole life is always self- confident and strong- the person everybody admire. Unlike me...I'm just a failure in the great Basses, who inherited only DNA of physical feature, nothing more of that. I sometimes doubt if I were really his child. It's not that one of them cheated the other- but look, I'm shy, insecurities, weak and ...yeah, pretty much everything of such things. Cate is way more similar to Dad and Mom. That's why she's always their favorite child."
"Don't beat yourself like that."
"I feel it, people have been told me, anyway..."
Ritchie shook his head, interrupting Nate.
"Someday she will take over Bass Industries. Everyone knows that. I'm thinking about going another direction - like academician. Nothing to do with business, I mean. I'm very good at reading, anyway. I can't compete with her."
"Ritchie,listen."
Nate sighed. Ritchie's explanation reminds him the accident- and its cause, or more precisely, his family. Family, legacy and battle. The family who caused this mess. This must be stopped.
"Once I told Blair we can't choose who we are. You're the second child of Chuck and Blair, it's unchangeable. And heir of Bass Industries, too. But you don't need to feel that way. Your life is what you built. You'll figure out, when time comes. You do not need to compete your sister. You both seem to have good relationship, don't ruin it because of that."
Unlike me and my cousin. Nate said to himself. But it's not something he rather not to remember. It's part of thing which he wishes if it never happened. Bad for them, thing has happened.
"She's good sister to me. Well, she mocks me most of the time- but at least she occasionally shows she cares me. It's not about me and her. It's about me. I'm the one who keeps failing to reach expectation people have toward me. But she doesn't."
As being raised as a member of Vanderbilt, I know that feeling- family, legacy and all. But you can never know- look, what happened to me and Blair. We supposed to get married. Now it's how everything was turned out."
Nate looked away a bit. It's not that he regrets how his life turned. It's lie if he says he isn't sad about what happened between him and Blair three years ago. She was his high school sweetheart, after all. The fact is, he still cares her. Not only her, he cares his best friend, too. If two of his best friends are about to jeopardize their life, how can he just sit and watch their misery. His mind eyes captured an illusion of young Blair and himself standing together in the Duck pond those days. Time flew and things changed, but the feeling he cares them still remains. They are always his best friends, now and forever. And now, here their children struggle. How can he close his eyes? He continued speaking. It's almost a confession of his true feeling of past years to almost stranger, but he doesn't care. He has already chosen to believe.
"We hurt each other too many times and betrayed each other. Once there was time that I decided to never forgive your father. But hey, I just can't stop caring him. Feeling just doesn't disappear. It never will. Blair must know that by now."
"I hope you're right."
He dropped his head down, still not really convinced by Nate. He knows how things work in UES. Emotion are suppressed. People cling to false faith. Feeling may not die, but buried deep under- people get lost too easily, friends turn to enemies. People tell the truth and lie. Past and memories cloud people's judge. You can follow your heart, but it doesn't guarantees the good outcome.
That's their problem. It's about rapidly changing future and misjudging, mistrust and false trust. Blair has built the wall already, someone must crack it, before they lose her. Losing Blair Waldorf equals losing her future family, losing two children of her. Their existence will be wiped, as if there are no person like Catherine and Richard Bass once.
"I've learned a lot from my experience. It was not always pleasant, but I feel I'm matured. Since I met you two, I decided to believe in the future. The future you've told me. The future, where we are all happy. It's not easy thing to keep faith, but I really would like to try this time."
Nate grinned, showing his teeth. Ritchie grinned back, feeling his darkened mind little bit lighter by his confession.
"Yeah, indeed. In 2013 you're-"
Ritchie started explaining Nate's future status to assure his future success, only stopped by Nate himself.
"Oops, don't tell me more of that. I don't want to spoil fun, remember?"
He chuckled a bit.
"We prevented Blair's wedding. Technically, she's single- Runaway bride or not, we'll find her. About Dan, don't worry too much. He knows who Blair truly loves. And so does Blair."
Nate patted his back to assure him. He nodded.
"Now let's go home and find your daddy and sister. It's getting late. "
Ritchie returned shy smile to Nate and then nodded. Deep in his mind he envied his father for having Nate as the best friend. His father has indeed great friends. He was never alone, even if he thought he was. Ritchie misses his family. He never missed his family like this much since his puberty started. Most of the time he thought he was annoyed by them - his great and powerful family. In 2012, his family is in a mess- father is distressed, mother is missing and sister is acting weird- Was it just a day before yesterday that his family lived happily together? Now they are far apart, closing their minds. He wants his family back. He felt his heart tightened. It was the ache he never felt before.
A/N2 Sorry for late update...while I was in London I had no internet connection. Plus, I struggled with this chapter, whether I divide into 2 or not... But word counts is over 5,000 so I decided to split it into 2 chapters. Next chapter will be updated within this week. I hope it's not too much angst :-P Thanks for kind reviews/alerts/favs! I thanks you guys so much3