Now that the funeral was over, Ichigo had nothing left to do in the soul society. He tried looking for Renji, but no one had seen him since the night before and he dared not go to Byakuya to ask. He had not seen the captain since early this morning and he did not wish to interrupt him. He had a hunch that Byakuya would be going back to his usual, cold self, not that he changed much last night. Ichigo finally, finally, got the smallest, teeniest glimpse of the face behind the mask, he wasn't ready to truly acknowledge the fact the he would never see it again. But, although he had no intentions on finding the man, Ichigo couldn't seem to get him off of his mind.

'I wonder why he took me to that place, to Rukia's private spot. Is he the only other person that knows about it?' He was sitting on his futon, in his guest quarters, contemplating everything that had happened. He and Byakuya had actually had a civilized conversation. Not a particularly long conversation, but a conversation nonetheless. For hours, while he was packing his things to go back to the world of the living, Ichigo thought about what was said.

"So do I."

'So do I…. So do I…' it replayed over and over in his head. Rukia had never heard the words –I love you- from her brother. He loved her, but he never said it. 'Just like me… I wonder if she knew. I wonder if she knew either of us loved her…'

B

The cup of tea Byakuya held shook delicately in his hand. For the first time in a very, very, long time he felt unsure of himself. He couldn't let go of the nagging feeling that everyone's eyes were on him, some full of sorrow and pity for his loss, others full of anger because he looked like he didn't even care. He had half a mind to set Senbonzakura loose on all of them, but the sane part finally convinced him that it wouldn't help anything.

After finishing his tea he stood, waited for the small servant girl to clear the table, and then strode to the mirror on the wall. This wasn't the first time he looked in it today. His face was the clear, blank perfection it always was but the moment he looked away, his imagination provided a different image; sickly pale skin, dark circles under puffy red eyes, hair sticking in odd waves instead of the usual arrow straight. His subconscious was giving him a visual of how he felt, and so, his feet repeatedly took him back to the mirror.

He sighed, running a hand over his face before turning away from the mirror and leaving for the sixth division headquarters. It was cloudy out today but no rain yet. He walked at a comfortable pace, in no hurry to be around people today. Knowing Renji would be late anyways, he knew he didn't have to be there immediately to throw orders at his lieutenant. The walk wasn't long, but it was peaceful, almost as peaceful as his night with Kurosaki.

'I wish… I wish I would have told her… that I loved her.'

'I wonder why he never told her. Was it fear? If so, then what kind of fear? Fear of rejection? Fear of commitment? Fear of love itself? Maybe… Maybe he didn't know…'

These questions intrigued him, batted at his brain until all he could see was an orange haired boy with love shining brightly in his deep brown orbs. Ichigo wouldn't fear love, no, so that meant he had to have just not figured it out. He just didn't know he was in love. Byakuya uncharacteristically rolled his eyes. 'That Kurosaki has to have the thickest skull of anyone that I have ever met.'

Suddenly, he realized he was in front of headquarters. Shaking his head slightly to dispel his thoughts, he slid open the door.

I

He didn't want to leave, not yet. After everything that happened, he didn't want to go back to the human world, back to his room with his empty closet, his classroom with an empty chair. That world was empty. What was once his home is now a void that he is afraid to walk into. Yes, afraid. He had a right to be afraid now… didn't he?

If he could just find a reason to stay, anything, anything at all, he would do it. He would clean the sewers with squad four if he had to.

A knock on the door interrupted his thoughts, making him loose the rhythm in which he was pacing. "Uh… M… Mr. Kurosaki? We have to leave now…" said a small boy, voice timid.

Ichigo growled loud enough for the boy to hear him and a slightly sadistic smile crept to his lips as he heard the boy shuffle away from the door. "Hold your horses, I'm coming."

"Y-yes, Sir."

Ichigo opened the door to reveal a small boy of the fourth squad, looking at the ground with confusion written all over his face, mumbling about how he doesn't have horses, so how is he supposed to hold them. The orange haired boy rolled his eyes and stalked out of the room.

"Umm… Mr. Kurosaki, Sir? … Uh… You're going the wrong way."

B

'Where the hell is Renji? He was supposed to be here over an hour ago. He's usually late, but not so much on the days we spar.' Byakuya looked over at Renji's desk, eyebrows knitted in suspicion. He never took much notice to his lieutenant's desk, except to tell Renji to clean it; the man really is a slob. Byakuya stood; he knew he shouldn't be doing this but he had a strange feeling. He didn't know how to explain it; somehow, he just knew there was something on the desk that could explain Renji's absence.

He sighed and walked to the desk, looking over his shoulder. He felt paranoid,

like someone was watching him, like the moment he opened the desk drawer Renji would walk in. Not that it would matter much but, he didn't want to get caught acting as if he were worried. That wouldn't be a good thing, especially since he opened up too much to Ichigo already. It wouldn't do to have a rumor going around that he actually had feelings or anything of the sort.

'It's Kurosaki… not Ichigo.' The captain sighed, looking up at the door one more time before sliding the desk drawer open. Nothing.

'Huh. Maybe I was over reacting.' He shook his head slightly, No, something is definitely wrong. He opened the only drawers left, the three drawers running down the right side of the desk, and searched through the papers. Still nothing.

Byakuya huffed as dignifiedly as is possible, sitting down in Renji's chair and crossing his arms. He knew Renji, knew almost everything about him, if not all. So if there was something to find, he would just have to figure out where Renji would have it.

Renji… Fiery, short-tempered… almost as clueless as Ichigo… ('Kurosaki!' Byakuya chided himself mentally) but most importantly, he wanted to get ahead of Byakuya Kuchiki, outsmart him, out perform him. Not many people knew, but it was actually a quite healthy competition between them, the captain and his lieutenant were… not really friends… but close acquaintances. This kind of thing happened a lot, but not like this, not when Renji wasn't here to see his captain squint his eyes in confusion. But Byakuya would play the game, figure out the problem. He always did.

A smile formed on his lips and he slid his hand along the underside of the desk, feeling for something. Renji always said, the best hiding place is right under your nose. He gripped the paper taped to the desk, pulling it off gently. Holding it up in front of his face he rolled his eyes for the second time that day, the top of the folded paper read "Knew ya'd find it capy-tan!" along with a drawing that was almost as bad as Rukia's. He flipped the paper open and flattened it out on the desk, leaning forward slightly to read it.

Hope I didn't make it to hard to find. So, I guess your wondering why I'm not there, and probably thinking of some cruel punishment for me or something. Sorry to disappoint you, capy but I'm not coming back. I resign. Rukia was the reason I became a soul reaper, without her, there's no reason for me to stay. Sorry for disappointin ya.

Renji

P.S.

Ichigo. Just think about it.

I

Ichigo was mumbling to himself, kicking rocks along the ground as he walked to find Ukitake, who would be accompanying him through the Senkaimon. Ukitake just wanted to talk, he was sure, to find out if Ichigo was doing alright. He winced at just the thought. What would he tell the other man? What could he tell him? 'Oh, ya know, I'm fine. My I killed my best friend, I can't get her brother off of my mind, I'm willing to clean sewers just to stay here. Just fine, not crazy at all.'

His footsteps faltered as a hell butterfly landed on the shoulder of the boy walking along with him. His eyes grew wide and he nodded before turning to Ichigo. "It seems, Mr. Kurosaki, that you won't be leaving yet."

"I won't?"

"No, Head Captain Yamamoto has requested your presence in his office."

Ichigo's eyes widened as well. "What's the old bastard want with me?"

The boy frowned in disproval at Ichigo's choice of words but answered him nonetheless "I… I do not know, but you'd better hurry." He pushed Ichigo in the right direction and Ichigo flashed stepped the whole way there.

Stopping outside the door to knock, he scratched his head nervously, trying to think of any reason for this. He was drawing a blank.

"Enter, Ichigo Kurosaki."

He walked in and looked around quickly, Yamamoto sitting behind his desk and… Byakuya.

Oh. This is why he was here. Suddenly, he wished he would have left earlier. He should have known Byakuya wouldn't just let him off so easily. He should have known he would die for this. He should be welcoming it… He wasn't. He didn't feel like dying today, today definitely wasn't a good day for death. It's cloudy and raining and… and… no one wants to watch an execution in the rain right?

"Kurosaki, Renji Abarai has resigned. Did you know about this?" Yamamoto said.

Well, that wasn't expected. "What? No. No, I didn't know… he… is he here? Did he leave?"

"He left," Byakuya cut in, "but that is not the point of calling you here. I have talked this over with Head Captain Yamamoto. We have decided that you would be suitable for the position."

"WHA?!? You want me to become a lieutenant? Don't you have to like… work your way up to that or something?! Shouldn't the new lieutenant do something to deserve the position?"

The Head Captain held up his hand to stop all further talking. "I think that no one deserves the position more than you, Ichigo Kurosaki. The only thing left to ask is… Will you accept?"