A/N: I'm sorry for the time it took for me to finish this chapter, BLAME MY LAZINESS!

Or be like Harry, and blame Snape and Malfoy. :)

Chapter IV

An Excess of Pink

When she got to the Great Hall, Karida realized once more that she didn't know where to sit. Malfoy was going on and on to Pansy about how Professor Snape said his potion was "absolutely perfect."

Instead of worrying about it, Karida picked up a plate, piled it with ham and cheese sandwiches, and headed to her dormitory to start on Snape's essay. She knew Professor Binns would assign some lengthy assignment that had the chance to take hours to complete. Just like everyone else in the school, Karida found it hard to stay focused on the dull dates and events from History of Magic.

As the clouds around the school had grown considerably darker, Karida made sure to take the route that would keep her inside the longest. Inevitably, she had to run across a courtyard, getting her robes considerably damp on the way.

The common room was empty, so Karida sat down on a table nearest to the fire and laid out a piece of parchment. After flipping to the glossary in her Potions textbook, she found it easy to list all of the properties of moonstone. In no time at all, she had written twelve full inches.

After biting off the crusts of the last sandwich triangle, Karida pushed her chair out and repacked her bag. Only a few older students had joined her in the common room, and judging by the piles of books and papers on their tables, they were only using the time to study as well. She took this to mean the floodgates had not opened up after lunch, and she had time to start unpacking before she had to run off to History of Magic.

The dormitory seemed so much larger without the other three girls lying about. The beds had already been made up since the morning, and any clothes on the floor had been neatly folded and laid on the duvet.

Karida's trunk had been safely stowed back under her bed, so she yanked it out and snapped the latches open. After pulling open the doors of the large brass wardrobe she shared with Daphne, Karida hung up her dress robes and her house sweaters. She had started stacking her extra schoolbooks on her desk when she started hearing more activity in the hallways. Karida slung her bag over her shoulder and made her way out of the dungeons.

Although she was expecting Professor Binns to go on yet another speech about the importance of the O.W.L.s, he was surprisingly oblivious that they were indeed starting their fifth year, and went straight on to a lecture about various giant wars. By the end of the period Karida had changed positions eleven times, from leaning back in her chair with her legs forward, leaning with her elbows on the desk, with her head on her desk, crossing her legs different ways, or almost sliding off onto the floor.

In her second year, she'd actually fallen asleep while Binns was rambling in his impossibly monotone voice; he didn't notice, of course, but Karida woke up very quickly when he'd walked straight through her desk after class was over. She didn't want to chance that happening again.

Her assumptions about the homework level were correct; Binns had decided that it was best to show the importance of their O.W.L. year by assigning their longest essay yet.

Directly after the bell rang, the whole class shot up from their desks. This was surprising, seeing as all of the students had been inanimate moments before. After slinging her bag leaden with textbooks, Karida sped out of the door to beat the other Slytherins.

Karida's last class of the day was with the new professor, Umbridge. She was a bit apprehensive as she weaved her way through the halls down to the classroom, thought it would be easy to tell whether Umbridge was a competent teacher or not; all of the previous Defense Against the Dark Arts professors showed their true colors very quickly.

Getting to class first had its benefits; all of the desks were empty and Karida had her pick. Naturally she chose the one in the back corner. This had become her strategy to avoid teacher calling on her.

After sitting down, Karida realized she was not alone in the classroom – Professor Umbridge was sitting at her desk, watching each of the students file in with an expression that should have said that there was no place she'd rather be. Instead, it was rather daunting. She was again wearing that horrid pink cardigan and it send waves of dislike through Karida.

The rest of the class came in shortly after, not wanting to get off on a bad impression with the new teacher. When everyone had gotten settled, Professor Umbridge sat up straight and addressed the entire room. "Well, good afternoon!" she said brightly.

This was one of those times where Karida just stayed silent; not really knowing whether to reply or not. There were a few dutiful students that mumbled a reply, but Professor Umbridge was not satisfied with this. "That won't do, now, will it? I should like you, please, to reply 'Good afternoon, Professor Umbridge.' One more time, please. Good afternoon, class!"

There seemed to be an audible outtake of breath before everyone in the class muttered "Good afternoon, Professor Umbridge," back at her.

"There, now, that wasn't too difficult, was it? Wands away –"

Karida did a double-take to check with her classmates to see if they should take Umbridge seriously. Sure enough, everyone was warily following her instructions. She carefully stowed her wand safely in her robe, and pulled out her note-taking supplies.

Professor Umbridge fished in her frilly, sparkly, and pink handbag for her wand, which she used to write slanted words on the blackboard.

Defense Against the Dark Arts

A Return to Basic Principles

"Well, no, your teaching in this subject has been rather disrupted and fragmented, hasn't it?" Umbridge said sweetly, making Karida wince. Her voice was going to get annoying, very fast. "The constant changing of teachers, many of whom do not seem to have followed any Ministry-approved curriculum," She said this with an audible pitch change, as if she was personally insulted by the thought of anyone going against the Ministry. "Has unfortunately resulted in your being far below the standard we would expect to see in your O.W.L. year."

Karida however, was darkly reminded of the impostor Moody's spell-casting on her, which could not have been a Ministry-approved curriculum. When he had found out that she was related to none other than Rabastan Lestrange, he seemed quite intent on getting her to break the hold of the Imperius curse.

"You will be pleased to know, however, that these problems are now to be rectified. We will be following a carefully structured, theory-centered, Ministry-approved course of defensive magic this year. Copy down the following, please." She rapped on the board again once more with her unusually short jeweled wand. The course aims appeared in the same lacy handwriting.

The class went silent and copied what was written. Karida squinted at the chalk from the back, confused. What spells would they be learning? What enchantments? What was the defensive magic that they'd put in context? From the sneaky peeks at the students at the desks around her, Karida didn't notice anyone else looking befuddled. Soon the whole class was once again appraising Umbridge, who looked back at them just as intently.

The second Seamus Finnigan had finished scrawling his last letter, Professor Umbridge clasped her hands together tightly and said, "Has everybody got a copy of Defensive Magical Theory by Wilbert Slinkhard?"

Karida almost started to reply, but stopped herself and just hummed her consent when Professor Umbridge directed her attention straight at her.

"I think we'll try that again," she said haughtily. "When I ask you a question, I should like you to reply 'Yes, Professor Umbridge,' or 'No, Professor Umbridge.'"

Karida closed her eyes to hide the fact that she was rolling them.

"So, has everyone got a copy of Defensive Magical Theory by Wilbert Slinkhard?"

"Yes, Professor Umbridge," Karida chanted with the rest of the class.

"Good," Professor Umbridge said, beaming as if she'd just taught a puppy how to sit. "I should like you to turn to page five and read chapter one, 'Basics for Beginners.' There will be no need to talk." She shuffled back to her desk on those stubby little legs of hers, looking almost like a pink slug as her long skirt rippled behind her.

Not talking for Karida was easy of course; she had no desire whatsoever to communicate to Pansy about her immediate dislike of Umbridge, nor to Malfoy that Granger's hand was once again in its position straight in the air. Though she probably would have joined in with Daphne in her fit of badly hidden giggles a couple years previously, Karida ignored her and began reading.

It was only after reaching the end of the first page that Karida realized she had not taken in a single word she had just read. She attempted to read it again, but felt her eyes start to feel quite heavy. Her elbow slipped off the desk, and she snapped her head up before it collided with her textbook.

Goyle was drooling, not even bothering to feign paying attention. A quarter of their class had their attention focused on Granger instead; her arm was still determinedly in the air. Even as several minutes passed and even more students stopped reading, Granger's hand stayed straight up in the air – maybe she had gotten practice from never being called on in Potions.

Malfoy was pantomiming his absolute favorite imitation that you could tell he had been waiting all summer to use again. Although Granger's slight bucktooth problem had been fixed the last year, Malfoy did not detract it from his usual mimic of her jumping up and down, raising her hand.

Probably half the class had decided that Granger was more entertaining than Slinkhard's theories on theories before Professor Umbridge finally regarded her. "Did you want to ask something about the chapter, dear?" she said, even though Granger's book was clearly unopened on her desk.

Granger gave her a degrading look and said, "not about the chapter, no."

"Well, we're reading just now," said Professor Umbridge, giving her a sickly sweet smile. "If you have other queries we can deal with them at the end of class."

"I've got a query about your course aims." Karida watched Granger retaliate with shock. Usually she was extremely respectful of the teachers at Hogwarts – but already she was seething.

Professor Umbridge noticed. "And your name is -?"

"Hermione Granger." She replied boldly.

"Well, Miss Granger, I think the course aims are perfectly clear if you read them through carefully." Though Professor Umbridge said this as sweetly as possible, Karida could see people in the class exchanging shocked glances. Any other teacher who had been in the school more than one day wouldn't have insulted Granger's comprehension skills.

Granger didn't look offended. "Well, I don't. There's nothing up there about using defensive spells."

Karida silently thanked Granger for letting her own concerns be heard, though she couldn't help but feel a little jealous as many of the pupils in the classroom nodded in agreement.

Professor Umbridge gave a wheezy giggle. "Using defensive spells?" Her head swiveled to look at the class as a whole. "Why, I can't imagine any situation arising in my classroom that would require you to use a defensive spell, Miss Granger. You surely," she gave another annoying giggle, "aren't expecting to be attacked during class?"

"We're not going to use magic?" Granger's friend spoke up.

"Students raise their hands when they wish to speak in my class, Mr. –?"

"Weasley." He grunted, sticking his hand into the air.

Professor Umbridge turned around as if dismissing the conversation, only to turn around and discover Potter and Granger's raised hands. "Yes, Miss Granger? You wanted to ask something else?" She chirped, her voice growing higher still, and her face flushing.

"Yes. Surely the whole point of Defense Against the Dark Arts is to practice defensive spells?" Karida nodded a fraction of an inch in agreement.

"Are you a Ministry-trained educational expert, Miss Granger?"

"No, but – "

"Well then," Umbridge squawked, her voice cracking. "I'm afraid you are not qualified to decide what the 'whole point' of any class is. Wizards much older and cleverer that you have devised our new program of study. You will be learning about defensive spells in a secure, risk-free way –"

"What use is that?" Potter practically yelled. The back of his neck was growing red. He always had a bad temper, Karida thought. "If we're going to be attacked it won't be in a – "

"Hand, Mr. Potter!" Professor Umbridge said in a determined singsong voice, and no one had to ask how she didn't need to ask for Potter's name. But when Potter stubbornly raised his hand, she turned away from him. Dean Thomas, another Gryffindor, had raised his hand, along with one of the Patil twins.

As Professor Umbridge grew more and more stressed, Karida rather felt as if she was watching a sporting event as more and more students ganged up on the teacher. She even half-raised her hand to join in, but Malfoy looked at her and she drew it down just as fast.

Eventually, Potter shouted out again. "What good's theory going to be in the real world?"

"This is school, Mr. Potter, not the real world," Professor Umbridge said softly.

"So we're not supposed to be prepared for what's waiting out there?"

"There is nothing waiting out there, Mr. Potter."

This reeled Karida back a bit. The Ministry had been trying to cover up You-Know-Who's return all summer, but most of the teachers at Hogwarts trusted Dumbledore's judgment. Umbridge seemed to be going with the popular opinion that there were in fact not Death Eaters on the loose, not dementors out of the Ministry's control, and not thousands of people in danger every day.

But even before You-Know-Who had returned, they learned normal Defense Against the Dark Arts at Hogwarts… Or at least they were supposed to. So why were they changing the curriculum now?

"Oh yeah?" Harry challenged, audibly getting more and more worked up.

"Who do you imagine wants to attack children like yourselves?" Karida squinted. She was almost fifteen, she wasn't a child…

"Hmm, let's think…" Harry said sarcastically, "maybe Lord Voldemort?"

Weasley gasped. Lavender Brown squealed. Longbottom fell on the floor. Karida's eyes just widened. And Umbridge didn't react at all. She actually looked somewhat pleased.

"Ten points from Gryffindor, Mr. Potter."

Malfoy grinned broadly, but didn't take his eyes off of the scene.

"Now, let me make a few things quite plain. You have been told that a certain Dark wizard has returned from the dead –"

"He wasn't dead," Potter snarled, "but yeah, he's returned!"

"Mr. Potter! You have already lost your House ten points, do not make matters worse for yourself!" Umbridge screeched in one breath, avoiding looking at him. "As I was saying," she said, tapping her talon-like nails on her desk to regain her composure, "you have been informed that a certain Dark wizard is at large once again. This. Is. A. Lie."

"It is NOT a lie!" Potter shouted. "I saw him, I fought him!"

"Detention, Mr. Potter!" Professor Umbridge interrupted. "I repeat, this is a lie. The Ministry of Magic guarantees –"

Karida suddenly wanted to raise her hand and say, "Oh, well if the lovely Ministry guarantees it, it must be true," but she just continued to sit, silently fuming.

"– that you are not in danger from any Dark wizards. If you are still worried, by all means come and see me outside class hours." One look around the classroom and anyone would be able to tell that no student would be doing so. "If someone is alarming you with fibs about reborn Dark wizards, I would like to hear about it. I am here to help. I am your friend."

Even I'm not that desperate, Karida thought.

"And now, you will kindly continue your reading. Page five, 'Basics for Beginners.'" Umbridge sat down with a triumphant humph.

Potter rose from his desk. Karida kept herself from admiring his bravery for the fact that he was being an idiot. Granger tried to coax Potter into sitting back down, but he refused. "So, according to you, Cedric Diggory dropped dead of his own accord, did he?" he said, trembling.

The entire class was still, waiting for Potter to reveal more about his night in the maze.

"Cedric Diggory's death was a tragic accident." She said in a practiced tone, her fake smile vanishing.

"It was murder. Voldemort killed him, and you know it." He spoke as bluntly as if he was speaking to the Ministry directly.

"Come here, Mr. Potter, dear," Umbridge said after a long pause, using her most artificial voice yet. She scrawled something on a small roll of pink parchment and handed it to Potter, who snatched it out of her outstretched hand and stormed out of the room to take it to Professor McGonagall.

As soon as he was gone, Umbridge settled herself back into her pouf, and stared challengingly at the class. No one said anything more, but started reading, determined to act like nothing happened.

It wasn't long after they had resumed however, that the bell rang. As everyone started to pack up, Umbridge stopped them. "I excuse you, not the bell, thank you." The class collectively glared at her, and sat back down.

"It looks as if all that time-wasting nonsense has prevented many of you from finishing the first chapter in your book. There shall be no more interruptions or distractions in my class, you understand? I expect this chapter to be read by everyone by the next class on Wednesday." Umbridge addressed them. "There. Now you are excused." Her face was still flushed. But it wasn't a delicate pink like those of the many doilies on her desk, but on the verge of being a deep purple.

Karida decided that maybe Defense Against the Dark Arts would replace Transfiguration as her least favorite subject this year.

The stream of fifth-years split into two as the Gryffindors and Slytherins went in opposite directions to their respective common rooms, but not until Malfoy had placed a strong jelly-legs jinx on Longbottom. He and the other Slytherins started down a flight of stairs in hysterics, while Karida lagged behind at an indistinguishable distance.

As soon as the rest of her class had disappeared down the steps, Karida turned back to give Longbottom the counter-curse, but he was already hidden behind a curtain of frizzy brown hair kneeling next to him.

Karida couldn't help herself from timidly walking up to them anyways.

With a flourish of her wand, Granger stopped the spasms of Longbottom's legs. He stood up shakily, sweating. He spotted Karida and his eyes widened dangerously. Granger turned on her heel.

"What do you want?" She said, continuing to hold out her wand. "I… I can assure you that I know more spells than you… So... So… Don't try anything!" She warned frantically.

"I wasn't…" Karida trailed off. She didn't know what to say. Her wand was tucked into her robes, but it looked as if Granger might try to jinx her any second. She just stood there awkwardly, her eyes darting across the room.

Longbottom fled in the direction the other Gryffindors had gone.

"I suppose you think Harry's a nutter too?" Granger challenged.

"No." Karida stated, glad for a question she could answer in one word.

Granger's eyes searched her face, making Karida's cheeks grow hot. She bowed her head and turned to go back down the steps.

By the time she had reached the Common Room to drop her books off, the rest of her year was on their way back up, halfheartedly leading the first-years. The same girl waved to her timidly.

Karida rushed back to the Great Hall so she wouldn't miss the first course of dinner. She had to sit in a closer proximity to Malfoy than she would have liked, although something told her that no matter where she sat she would be able to hear him loudly recounting Potter's freak out in Umbridge's class to anyone who'd listen.

Since she wasn't that hungry anyways, as soon as Karida had gotten sick of the bland chicken she had been eating, she left the table. The thought of missing dessert saddened her a bit, but Karida just wanted to finish the day.

The common room was empty when she got to it, so she took her favorite seat by an ebony table and set to work on her History of Magic essay. She had spent what she thought was at least three hours searching for references from her dull textbook, when other Slytherins started to file into the common room in groups. After only maybe an hour of writing, Karida had only filled up four inches of parchment.

The common room started to get more and more crowded, and Karida found it hard to focus. She had just started a sentence when she heard Malfoy's muffled voice, and then Pansy's muffled shriek of a laugh. Karida tried to gather her things as possible to get to bed before they saw her.

She swore a bit too loudly when she spilled all of her brand new self-correcting ink bottle on the parchment, soiling the essay she'd barely started. Yanking out her wand as fast as she could, Karida muttered "Tergeo" and the ink cleared immediately. Even though she wasted the whole bottle, her essay was saved and she decided that's all that really mattered. During a Hogsmeade visit she could pick up some at Zonko's.

She was safely out of the common room before Malfoy showed his pointy nose.

Karida changed into her night robes, and climbed into bed, though she found herself to be very awake. She knew the solution: Instead of putting of reading Umbridge's chapter for two days, why not read it now to help her fall asleep? She may not remember it in the morning, but who cares?

After digging through her bag for the thick book, Karida drew her curtains shut around her bed and lit her wand. She opened to page five, and began to read where she left off.

Almost immediately she felt her eyes start to droop, but she made herself read until the end.

Just as she expected, the chapter was as dry as Millicent Bulstrode's personality.

I HATE UMBRIDGE.

BUT LOVE REVIEWS. :)

Thanks for reading, I'll try to update faster next time - I'm really excited for a part that will happen next chapter... Maybe two depending on the time lapse I decide on :)

I love you all~