Chapter 4 – Just breathe

RPOV

"Oh My God, you look amazing honey. I can't believe you pull that out without my help"

My aunt Alice is really charming sometimes isn't she? But she's actually right. I can't believe how amazing I look, and I did all of this without her help. I guess I feel really good about myself right about now.

Oh wait, here comes the guilt. How can I be this happy when I'm about to seduce her husband. I really am a horrible person aren't I? I guess there's just a little part of me that doesn't want him to be lured by me. Because if he does we'll be hurting a lot of people and those people are the ones we care about the most in this horrible and unfair world. What am I suppose to do now? Just forget about him? I've tried and I can't do it, I just can't.

"I'm so proud of you honey, you look so beautiful. You really have grown to be a very special young woman haven't you?"

"Oh. Thanks mom. I really don't deserve those king words. I really don't."

"Don't be silly. You should be proud of yourself. You really should."

"I'll try… But thanks anyway."

"You're welcome sweetie."

How can I be doing this? Thinking like this when I know my family would be so disappointed at me if they found out. I feel like crap right now. Only one thing could sheer me up right now and I know if that would happen it would only make me feel worst.

Oh great, here comes my good luck.

"Wow, Ren… You look… I… I don't have words that can describe how gorgeous you are right now."

Damn my dazzling vampire, why does he always have to do this. Make me blush like these. Stupid, jackass, annoying, kind, beautiful, sweet vampire of mine… Oh no Ren, you can't think like that! He's pure evil making you feel like that.

"Thanks Jazz."

I guess they really were right. I did look beautiful with my red, short, strapless dress. I love it; it's one of my favorites. And even though I know Alice would rather see me with my hair up I know how Jazz loves to see my red curls flowing down my back. So I just left my curls hang loose for the night.

"Hey Ren. You look amazing."

"Thanks Jake. What are you doing here? I thought you had some pack thing to take care of."

"I did and I still do but I wanted to give your birthday present now since I don't know when I'm going to see you again."

Even though it hurts me I know he's right. Now that Sam got down from his alpha position because of Emily and the baby he left Jake to take care of both packs which means he's been having so much to do that I hardly see him anymore.

"Oh, ok Jake. But you really didn't have to give me anything."

"Don't be like that Ren. You know I would never do that. So do you want your present or what?"

"Hum… You know how I love presents. Give me."

Wow, it's so beautiful. It's one of the most gorgeous necklaces I have ever seen. It's simple just like him. It has a metal chain and at the bottom it has a little heart.

"Wow, I don't even know what to say. Thank you so much Jake. You really are the best friend I could ever have." And it was so true.

"You're welcome honey. Anything for my little princess. Oh and before I forget. You see that heart over there. It means that you'll always own my heart. It will beat for you till the end of times."

"You're so sweet Jake. I don't deserve all of that but thanks anyway. I better go now. I have a party to get to."

"Ok. Bye my Renesmee." After that he whispers in my ear "You will always be my Nessie…"

"Goodbye my Wolf. Love you."

"Love you to."

Only now I realize that everybody is staring at us. I even think Jasper looks like he's in pain but that's probably just my imagination.

*blushing* "C'mon Will, let's go. Bye guys."

"Goodbye you two. Stay safe."

"Always are, mom."

And with that we drove to a huge clearing in middle of the woods that my brother and I found a couple of months ago. We thought that with some sort of coating for the floor it would be perfect.

The car drive has been filled with a very awkward silence. I wish somebody would say something but it doesn't look like that's going to happen any time soon. Right now I just want to get to the party and get drunk as fast as I can.

"Look sis, when we get to the party I want you to promise me something, can you do that?" Wow, this isn't like him at all…

"Of course Will, whatever you want."

"Promise me you won't do anything you might regret. I just, don't want you getting hurt that's all."

"Oh… I guess I can do that."

"Promise?"

"Yes, I promise."

Why would he be saying these things? Does he know about Jazz? Wait, no, that's impossible, I didn't tell him anything but then again he knows me better than I now myself sometimes.

…

"Hey guys!" Wow, this looks amazing! My aunts really worked hard to make my party the best.

"Let's get this party started!" Gosh Will, don't be so hysterical…

This really looks beautiful. There are lights everywhere hanging from the trees. And there's also some chairs and tables around the dance floor, and everything is so white! The floor is white, the tables and chairs are white. Even the Dj's mixer is white.

"Hey girl, wanna get something to drink?" Of course my amazing best friend Melanie would know what I want.

"Hell yeah I do!"

And with that we go over the table with drinks and get ourselves some shots. Wait scratch that. Lots and lots of shots!

Half an hour later I was already wasted and dancing with random guys. Like I always do. I just haven't dance with jasper. Where is he anyway? I haven't seen him since we got here. Oh there he is. As I excuse myself from my current dancing partner I go over to him.

"Hey Jazz! You having fun?"

"Yeah… And you're drunk."

"So?" Sure he's right but it's none of his business so he can't just go and judge me like that!

"You're supposed to have fun without having to be completely wasted." Maybe I'm being mean but what the Hell it's my party and his not going to screw that up.

"Well Jasper, I'm gonna tell you something. What I do and what I don't do it's none of your business! Got it?" I really was being harsh but it's my party and I get to have fun the way I want to have fun.

"Fine… Than go off and screw some guys while you're at it."

"Maybe I will!"

And with that I stormed out of his way and went to find me the cutest guy I could find. Of course this would probably be a huge mistake but right now I'm drunk and mad so I don't really give a shit.

And that's when I see him. The perfect lab rat. The hottest guy in school. Not as hot as Jasper and Jake but still really close. And he probably won't give a shit if I stick around afterwards so… There's no harm in it is there?

"Hey! What's your name?" Wow, he looks even cutter than he used to. But then again that might be the alcohol talking.

"It's Chase. Edward Chase. But my friends call me Eddie, Chase and sometime Eddie Chase. So you can pick the one that you like the most." Hum… He actually does have a really cute smile.

"Hum… Then it will be Eddie." I give him my best sexy smile. And he seems to like it because even with hole I'm superman appearance, he still blushed a little. I think.

"So, what's your name?"

"Oh, it's Renesmee. But you can call me whatever you want. I've been call Nessie, Ren… But you can make one up for yourself."

"Hum… How about Nezz?"

"Sounds great." Oh right I almost forgot. "Do you wanna go some place?"

"Sure thing Nezz."

And just like that we headed towards the forest.

As we reached a place where nobody could hear us, even vampires, I stopped for a second to tell him something but I never got a chance to do it because in one swift movement I was being fearlessly kissed. I don't think I have ever been kissed like that. That much passion kind of reminds me of what I see in my parents' eyes but I had just met him so that's impossible I guess.

One minute later he licked and sucked on my bottom lip asking for entrance which I gladly gave him. As our tongues met I just couldn't help to moan in his mouth, and I think he liked it because right after that he pinned me against a tree and as a wrapped my legs around his waist he started to kiss my neck and the top of my cleavage.

And almost like I'm begging for more, which I actually was, I unwrapped my legs from his waist and start taking my dress off ever so smoothly. I think he was practically drooling as he saw me half naked in front of him. But even though I wasn't wearing a bra for some reason I didn't feel uncomfortable and so I started taking his shirt and his pants off leaving him just like me.

Almost completely naked and needing of more. Just like he had read my thoughts he took off his boxers and my very wet panties so he could push me again against the tree. Quickly with one swift movement he inserted one finger inside of me and started pumping. I practically came right there and then. God knows I'm not a virgin but that made me feel like I've never felt before.

I started moaning louder and louder and since he obviously saw that I was enjoying his little teasing he pushed another finger into me. But I couldn't take it anymore so all I could say was "Just fuck me already."

He was a little bit shocked with how bluntly I said it but God damnit I was drunk and horny and he just wouldn't stop teasing me.

But I guess my words worked because suddenly I felt him slid into me and I had to really hold myself with how good that felt. Feeling him inside of me just made me forget about Jasper, Jake and my promise to Will. All that mattered in that moment was me and him. Nothing could make that moment even better than it already was.

He starts pushing in and out of me until we finally came together screaming each other names like old lovers. After we catch our breath he pulls out of me and puts his clothes back on just like me.

After all of this I just don't know what to say to him, I mean what's a person supposed to say to guy you just met and fucked? So I just started walking away but he went after me and grabbed my hand.

"Can I see you again?" I guess he's not the kind of guy that fucks and leaves after all. I think I kind of like it.

"Sure. You know my brother right?"

"Yeah I do."

"Well, than you can ask him for my phone number."

"Ok. Goodbye Nezz." He kisses me in the cheek and all I can say while I blush madly is

"Bye…"

When I went back to the party I had the feeling that someone's was watching me but since I know that person is Jasper I really didn't care about it. For the rest of the party I just danced like crazy with Mel as I continued giving Eddie some dirty looks.

When everybody were already too drunk and high to walk, people just started to lay down some place to sleep it off before going home so that's what me and my brother went to do. But when I was about to get some sleep he says something that almost made burst into tears.

"I can't believe you broke your promise. You promised me you weren't going to do anything you weren't supposed to do but you still went into the middle of the woods to fuck Chase. I'm only saying these so you don't get the chance to blame me for telling Jake where you were. He said he needed to talk to you so I thought why not tell him since you said you weren't going to anything bad. I guess I was wrong trusting you like that… Anyway all I know is that he's more heart broken than he has ever been. I don't think he'll ever be able to forgive you for doing such a thing."

"What?! Why would he be mad? It has nothing to do with him!"

"Are you that stupid Ren? He's in love with you since like forever! It's like you're the only person who doesn't see it."

"But… I… I didn't… mean to…" I couldn't even speak with how much I was sobbing…

So I did what only a coward like me can do. I ran. I ran as fast as I could.

I didn't know where I was going or what I was going to do. All I knew was that I had to get out of that place.

And that's why I'm laying down on the beach crying like there's no tomorrow.

In one day I almost cheated on my aunt with her husband.

I yelled at the one person that never hurt me.

I broke a promise.

And if that wasn't enough I broke the heart of the one who thought I was his everything. My best friend. The light to my darkest days. And without that light all I can do is sink in the darkness. But I guess it's what I deserve. Spending my days in a place where I just can'tbreathe.

I put a lot of effort into this one so please tell me what you think… Do you like Eddie or what?

Oh and you can also find in my profile how I picture some stuff from the story.

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