Kurt
Dear Diary,
I just- I really don't know where to start. Uggh, I've met a boy,- no a man. A doe-eyed, curly haired, perfect man. Who of which, goes be the name of Blaine Anderson. Oh god, I think im blushing again. I have been doing that all day long and I feel so embarrassed because I, Kurt Hummel, can truly say that I have a crush on the enemy, a preppy and no doubt, Rachel is going to be so mad. But I don't really care because, well, he's GAY! I call this progress after my track record with guys. To be honest ,I'm just proud to say I've never swooped so low as to have crushed on Puck!
I don't even know where to begin. He grabbed my hand and I swear I felt something. I don't know a spark and I kinda just wanted to melt. Do I sound crazy to you? well, of course I do, your a book! But seriously when he started singing I just went- . Uggh! I don't even know! It hard to describe his voice, if I were to try to narrow it down, his voice is the exact opposite of mine. He has dark brown nearly black hair that is extremely curly and I bet it would be cute if there wasn't so much gel slicked through it. He has big hazel eyes that are the colour of caramel and has amazing flecks of green through them. Oh god! Do you think he knew I was staring into them? I hope not. And finally he had a adorable goofy smile and a beautiful laugh.-,Great now I sound like im writing one of those cheap romance books. Next thing you know I'm gonna image him running through the rain or something. He sang Teenage Dream by Katy Perry. I'm not usually a big fan of her but I could get used to hearing Blaine singing her songs to me.
But then again, what the hell is he gonna see in a guy like me anyway. Im just me a complete and utter weak-link. Who wants a person like that? I can't even stand up for myself. I'm nothing but a shell of what I was. I used to be so comfortable in my own skin and now- thats just it! What am I now? I have so many different masks I don't even know which one the really me is any more. I pretend to be happy, to be confident and strong for the people around me. I don't know what I would do if they found out that I was a scared and hopeless little coward. My Dad can't find out about the bullying, his heart just couldn't take it. God if I lost him I would- I don't know what I would do.
And then there's Blaine, he can't find out. Today at the coffee house was so great. I got on so well with him. Would he still like me if he found out that Im the schools punching bag? I mean he was so understanding about me spying on him and his glee club. What do I do? Oh- Yeah I forgot, or more like tried to forget, Im completely alone. I have no one I can turn to for advice. Maybe Blaine doesn't need to find found about school...
-Kurt
Kurt slammed the diary and shoved it roughly underneath his pillow. And flopped back on to his bed and thought about Blaine. He was so understanding today, about the whole spying thing. So maybe Kurts costume wasn't as good as he thought. He smiled, embarrassed thinking back on the events of his day.
Kurt watched Blaine pick up his leather satchel and walk through the crowd of boys, who were standing around in awe. Kurt couldn't understand why couldn't his own glee club be as popular as theirs. I mean, they had Rachel and she was a handful but if Kurt could see through her annoying ways surely the people in his school could right? Kurt was so jealous.
Blaine beamed at Kurts shocked expression. Kurt blushed at the way Blaine looked at him, it was almost like he knew him.
"So, what'd you think ?" Blaine said brushing past Kurt and down the hall, Kurt followed and tried to think of a smart reply, but failed.
"Honestly, I thought you were great." Kurt said looking down not wanting to meet the boys gaze.
"Really? " Blaine looked up and stared at Kurt. Kurt gazed into Blaines hazels eyes. Kurt followed Blaine into what he assumed was their school library and sat down at a table. It was quite empty.
"So, what at you gonna tell your school?" Blaine blurted out and leaned forward on his forearms. Kurt could feel his face flame and he looked down. What he that obvious?
"I have no idea what your talking about -"
"Oh come on, Kurt we could spot you a mile off!" Blaine laughed. " Dalton is extremely strict on school uniforms and if you had stepped in here during the school day you would have been found out."
Kurt panicked, we oh God are they going to beat me up? No Kurt! Act cool." Do I look that bad?" Kurt blushed.
"No!" Blaine rushed out." What I mean is- I mean ,I didn't mean to offend you or anything." It was Blaines turn to blush. " I mean if someone was visiting the school you'd blend right in. You look totally awesome." Blaine looked flustered. Kurt laughed at his attempt to compliment him and shook head..
Blaine looked down and sighed. A silence fell between them. Blaine looked like he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him.
"I'm gonna tell them you were rubbish ." Kurt said finally.. Blaine shot him a quizzical look..
"One of my friends is the caption of our glee club and well shes the most annoying person you'll ever meet and I don't need the stress of more rehearsals" Kurt shrugged, it was half true.
"What school do you go to?" Blaine asked smirking.
"McKinley." Kurt said and raised an eyebrow.." Why?"
"No reason" Blaine said looking down. " Are you talking about Rachel Berry?"
Kurts snapped up to meet his. Kurt wanted to throw up, he's straight! It was times like these that Kurt felt like screaming, little Miss. Rachel Berry was always getting the things Kurt wanted. She was always got everything Kurt wanted, he hated it. He shuddered at the old thoughts of Finn.
Blaine could feel the other boy tense up.
"Yeah, shes dating my brother, though." Kurt said smugly.
Blaine laughed. " Really? How?"
"Do you know her?" Kurt said confused. Well, that wasn't the reaction he was expecting
"Yeah, theres a Christmas concert thingy that I'm involved in. She and I have to sing Baby, Its Cold Outside." Blaine said leaning back in his chair. " God ,she was horrible to me at the auditions, her Dad is directing it so she was there."
"Christmas?" Kurt asked." Buts thats months away."
"I know but I saw the audition flyer and thought ,why not? I love to perform in case you haven't notice" Blaine shrugged." Shes getting better though. Although, we have to dance together and its kinda immediate, thanks to her Dad. Anyway, she made me prove to her that I was gay before she'd even let me hold her hand."
Kurts heart scored. He bit down on his cheek to stop the smile from spreading across his face. But Kurt couldn't stop the sentence that flew from his mouth." You're gay?"
Kurt mentally face palmed himself.
Blaine laughed and Kurt felt something change inside him, his laugh is so perfect."Yes, I am. Do you have a problem with that?"
Kurt shook his head furiously. " What? No, I don't have a problem with you being gay, I'm gay! But Im sure you already know that."
Blaine smiled and something flashed across his eyes that Kurt didn't understand. " It's okay, I get that alot."
"Im sorry, but I have to ask ,is spying on us the only reason you're here?" Blaine asked cocking his head to one side." I was watching you when I was singing you seemed-"
"Let me stop you right there," Kurt said , a strange look appeared in his eyes," I came here because I wanted to check out the competition and , well, I wanted to see-"He cut off by his phone which was playing Don't Rain on my Parade.
"Speak of the devil." Kurt mumbled and shot Blaine an apologetic look before answering the phone.
"Hello...yes...No-" Kurt tried to say down the but often got cut-off." Rachel, calm down! I'm talking to him...yes, I know you know him...Yes I'm coming back now, I'll see you later, be over for around eight."
"Okay, bye." Kurt hung and slid the phone back into his pocket. " I'm sorry but I have to go, Rachel calls."
Kurt stood up and gather his coat and bag and looked up at Blaine." Why didn't you report me or beat me up? If someone was spying at my school, I don't think we'd be so friendly."
Blaine looked down with sad eyes before back into Kurts eyes." I would never bully you." There was a short silence between them as Kurt felt the meaning and depth in Blaines words, before he continued." Besides I like you."
"Do you wanna do something tomorrow? I have need a new shirt and stuff in the mall and I was gonna go by myself but- Do you wanna come?." Kurt rushed out.
Blaine nodded and smiled shyly before pulling out his phone, the two boys exchanged numbers before Blaine walked Kurt to the main doors. Kurt walked calmly to his car and smoothly sat into the vehicle before doing a happy dance with the stirring wheel. Kurt held up his hand in front of his eyes, he felt a spark of electricity run through it when Blaine grabbed it .
The door bell brought Kurt back from his memory and he shot up from his bed and looked at the digital clock on his bedside locker. It was ten past eight. The blue eyed boy moaned and rolled over into the cushion, he didn't want to be quizzed by his friends, he was still processing everything himself. Was tomorrow a date? God he was so unprepared.
"Kurt! Rachel and Mercedes are here!" Kurt moaned again, he was meant to have dip and food prepared, but he got carried away with his thoughts. He rolled off his bed and skipped down the stairs. Mercedes and Rachel stood side by side at the front door they looked like the drama masks because there was a frown ironed on Rachels face and Mercedes had an evil smile plastered on hers. Finn stood across from them with a confused look on his face.
"So, Burt and mom will be home in an hour , I'll see you lot tomorrow." Finn said to Kurt, he leaned over to kiss Rachel on the cheek. She nodded at him as he headed out the door. Finn was going to spend the night at Sams and some of the other guys.
" So Kurt-" Mercedes started but Rachel cut him off.
" What the hell happened?" Rachel said placing her hands on her hips."I can't believe you spied on them, why would you swoop so low?"
" Is that what you wore? Rachel said something about a guy!" Mercedes cut in too. Kurt rolled his eyes and walked into the kitchen.
" Okay both of you calm down." Kurt said."To answer your question Rachel, yes I went to spy on Dalton but only because I was told to-"
" If you were told to jump into a ring on fire would you!" Rachel exclaimed.
" Rachel, you angry at me for spying, you have been rehearsing a duet with the caption of the Warblers!" Kurt said, his voice raising in pitch.
"Okay, What!" Mercedes shouted ,snapping her head around to Rachel. " And you didn't tell us?"
" Look, yes I spied and I'm not proud of it, but I met a boy there." Kurt smiled, wanting to put an end to the fight he could envision happening. Both of his friends faces brightened up immediately.
The three friends continued to talk about the hazel eyed boy as Kurt prepared nachos and dip. Kurt floated around the kitchen thinking about Blaine he could faintly hear Rachel and Mercedes talking behind him and added a grunt reply every now and then. Every time he closed his eyes e could see beautiful hazel iris' behind his lids. Kurts phone buzzed in his pocket.
Hey Kurt, I was wondering what time you wanted to meet tomorrow? Because we totally forgot :) - Blaine Anderson.
Both girls squealed as Kurt typed up a reply. He rolled his eyes at them but on the inside he was screaming.
Hey, umm is two okay for you? ;P - Kurt Hummel.
The reply was almost immediate.
Thats great :D But aren't you forgetting something? - Blaine Anderson.
No, what ? - Kurt Hummel.
Umm Kurt where are we meeting? lol - Blaine Anderson.
Kurt looked up completely red before typing up a reply.
"Oh Kurt, your blushing!" Mercedes purred at him across the breakfast bar. Kurt qucikly typed a reply imforming Blaine of which mall they would meet.
"Whats he saying?" Rachel mumbled still not totally on board.
Kurt blushes and turns around quickly to finished his task, " We're going shopping."
" Is it a date?" Mercedes smiles.
"No, I don't think so. " Kurt says trying desperately not to sound to sad.
" Oh, come on Kurt, this is totally a date." Mercedes says trying to encourage him and failing.
"Look, 'Cedes, I don't even know what the deal is with him. I don't know if he has a boyfriend, I don't know if I'm his type. You didn't see him Cedes he's perfect and im...well...not Im anything but." Kurt said sadly before placed the bowl of nachos and dip on to the table before turning to get the pizza menu's from the drawer.
" Stop that." Rachel interjected. " I hate the thought of this relationship but if I'm being honest, I think you'd be really good together. I've known you for a while Kurt and you really shouldn't put yourself down, your pretty awesome." She smiled softly at Kurt.
" You are Kurt and thats all you can be! And we all love you for it." Mercedes said.
Im weak and pathetic, Kurt thought.
"Look right now Im just bathing in the fact that I like a gay guy." Kurt said falsely before spreading a range of take-out menus on the counter-top.
Later, the three friends were flopped on top of Kurts bed, rambling about anything and everything.
"Oh God, please Rachel stop, just stop!" Kurt clutched his stomach with laughter. Mercedes was wiping a tear from the corner of her eye she was curled up on her side like Kurt.
"Its not that bad." Rachel grumbled sitting down with her back to the headboard. She looked adorable in his pick fluffy P.J's that were covered in heart and blue love hearts and bunnies.
"It really is!" Kurt blurted out before going into fits of laughter again.
" Yes, please don't ever and I mean ever sing that for anybody ever again." Mercedes said hugging one of Kurts many throw cushions. She was outfitted in a lemon tank top and lime green striped P.J bottoms.
" I just don't understand whats wrong with it !" Rachel sighed and picked up her notebook, which had "lyrics" written in it.
"Rachel, you just sang us a song about your headband" Kurt said biting his lip to stop the laughter which was about to escape him. Kurt was, as usual, wearing designer brand P.J's which were made from navy silk and fluffy socks and a grey dressing-gown.
" Well, they say-" Rachel was cut off by a beeping noise.
"Sorry, thats me." Mercedes said as she pulled out her phone. She rolled her eyes," Its just a Facebook notification." She typed something into her phone before snapping her head up suddenly and frightening Rachel.
"What?" Kurt said curiously.
"Where's your laptop?" She asked, her eyes scaning the room. Kurt reached down and pulled it up from underneath his bed and handed it to her.
"Why?" He and Rachel asked at the same time.
"I was just wondering if maybe theres a certain Warbler on Facebook in which we could spy on." She grinned.
"Oh, actually, Im friends with him on it." Rachel said sitting up closer to Mercedes. Let the guy-spy begin.
"And you were about to give out to Kurt for liking him, Rachel your practically attached to him. I think we need to worry about you giving him our set-list." Mercedes joked.
Kurt had sat forward now curious about learning more about the hazel-eyed boy. Kurt tugged the laptop off Mercedes and into his lap. He was already logged in and simply typed Blaine Anderson into the search box.
His page wasn't on private so Kurt could see everything. His profile picture was a picture of himself in his Warblers uniform standing next a huge poster of Harry Potter . Hmm, he's a Potter fan too... Kurt thought. But Kurts eyes were drawn to the hot pink sun glasses he was wearing. Kurt blushed, he was so handsome.
"He always wears those things to rehearsals." Rachel giggles referring to Blaines glasses. But Kurt isn't listening instead he clicks into the other boys photos. Kurt is riveted he flicks mindlessly through Blaine many pictures. They are all from Dalton though, Kurt notices. There are no family photos just him and the Warblers. He pauses on a photo of Blaine singing on stage, he has such a passionate look on his face, his eyes are closed but yet you can still see all the emotion on his face, its beautiful. Kurt clicks for the next photo and his heart stops. Its another picture of Blaine dressed in his Dalton uniform he's lying in the grass, his eyes are closed and theres a content and happy smile upon his face, but thats not what was affecting Kurt.
He's holding another boys hand, who is lying beside him resting his head on Blaines shoulder.
Tomorrow definitely wasn't a date Kurt thought sadly, closing the laptop.
Hi, I'm super sorry for the delay I've been super busy and haven't really had any time to myself. So I sat down and wrote this longer-then-usual chapter for you lot so bear in mind there probably will be mistakes, sorry again.
Im really ,really happy though because of all your alerts and reviews and favourites. I love them and they make my day, your all lovely people I love you's.
Finally, I need a name for the story. Im really bad with coming up with them, suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Its a girls name I'm looking for. I could really use the help. I'll pick the one I like the best :)
Reviews make my world go round :D