A/N: So, it is 10:13 PM at night and I aim to finish this chapter at light speed. This is the part of the s***** author's note where I beg for reviews. Please review so I know people actually read this (lmao if anyone does). I am trying to concentrate on making this, but I am also watching a pokemon rom stream, so I might not be concentrating fully. Have fun baring through this chapter.
"As I said, you are coming with me," Arcedeus said. "I hope you enjoy your millenium long stay in time prison."
"I will not allow this!" Bob exclaimed. "I will defeat you and I will, uh, kill you I think."
"Bob, you had too much drugs," Lorenzo said. "I actually think time prison might actually help you with your addictions that were barely mentioned previously."
"Enough stalling!" Arcedeus said. "Transporting you to time jail in a count of 3. 3, 2, 1, 0.5, 0.25, 0.125, 0.0625, 0.03125…"
Lorenzo and Bob both stared blankly at Arcedeus. They obviously didn't catch on. Bob was too high up, and Lorenzo was just stupid. Arcedeus just sighed.
'Is this really what I'm spending my time on nowadays?' Arcedeus thought. 'These morons don't even try to fight back! But if they don't fight back, that must mean they are ridiculously stupid. If they're that stupid, they shouldn't be a threat to the polyverse like I thought they would be! That or this is some elaborate plan. Or it is-'
"So, are we getting arrested or not?" Lorenzo asked. "And what even is time jail? That seems really interesting and would make for a great plot line! I don't think there's been a giant prison escape arc on for pokemon so far! In fact, I might improve my skills a lot by being devastated in life! Just like all of those betrayed fanfictions that I read for trainer improvement tips!"
"Yeah man, I agree with you," Bob said while snorting some meth. "Wait, what were you saying again, Joel? And why is there a giant llama in front of me? I've only done 15 kilograms so far."
Arcedeus just left promptly after flipping them off and leaving to watch Breaking Bad in his throne room. There were better ways to spend his time than to deal with idiots. If he wanted to deal with idiots, he would just go to a universe where everyone is an idiot and laugh at them.
Right after Arcedeus left, Bob tossed all his meth, cocaine, LSD, and acid in the garbage can. He shook his face a few times, getting rid of the high expression that was on it a few moments prior.
"Brilliant acting, Lorenzo!" He exclaimed. "How did you know that the best way to deal with a deity was to act stupid or high and make him leave in confusion? OR is it just that great minds think alike?"
"Acting?" Lorenzo said. "You're acting stranger than normal. I thought we were in a fanfiction, not a movie. And I'm famous? How much is my own autograph worth?"
Bob paused, realizing what just happened. He thought it was best just to ignore this and just leave it be.
"You know what would be a smart idea?" Bob asked, a rhetorical question. "Continuing on with your bland journey to become a pokemon master."
"Oh yeah," Lorenzo said. "I almost forgot! Let's go and beat up some people with mullets!"
"Where did you even get the mullet part from?" Bob asked. "I just looked into the future and we don't encounter anyone with mullets, let alone beat up someone."
"What about girls?" Lorenzo asked. "Mullets are just long hair in the back, and short hair in the front. I'm pretty sure a lot of girls have that hairstyle, so I will beat up people with mullets! With my fists!"
"But why?" Bob asked. "And isn't assault illegal? And you'll get thrown in jail, and you won't be able to escape, because the government isn't a monarchy run by a llama."
"But we'll just do the same thing we did previously," Lorenzo said. "We are already on the run from the police for murder, so squeezing in some other crimes won't hurt if we're already going to be arrested for crimes."
"He wanted to arrest us for a different reason, because of the potential danger we show to the multiverse we are in, potentially the polyverse," Bob said. "I thought that was obvious."
"I think we should go to the world tournament," Lorenzo said. "Wait, is a random kid turning edgy and powerful on ?"
"Yeah, and he just went to the mountain," Bob said. "We need to participate in at least one league tournament to get qualified, and we need to make the semifinals."
"Cool!" Lorenzo yelled for no reason. "Now let's go to Pewter City, the legitimate way."
They exited the Viridian gym and walked towards the Viridian Forest to go to Pewter City. It was described to be a lush and beautiful forest, but for some reason all of the trees were dead.
"Is this the right forest?" Lorenzo asked. "It's normally much healthier than this," He pointed to a pedestal. "It even shows a picture here, and it's vastly different."
"Nope, this is not the right forest we are looking for," Bob said. "This is the Forest of Illusions, and lures in unsuspecting trainers so they will have a large, uninterrupted filler arc. I think that's really unnecessary."
"Then where is the right forest?" Lorenzo asked. "And how did we even get here? We're in Johto!"
"I actually have no clue about that one," Bob said. "I can only guess that someone or something is trying to sabotage us," He then pulled out a long piece of paper, almost as long as a costco receipt. "What I have here is a list of all known reality shifters and powerful beings who could have done this. What is known so far is that neither Arcedeus or any of the Arceuses could've done this."
The list automatically shortened to a smaller size, with only two names on the list, Robert Roman and Raul Pearson.
"Who's Robert Roman?" Lorenzo asked, following by him being whapped across the knuckles with a ruler.
"That's me, what do you think Bob is short for?" Bob said. "The Roman part comes out from when I helped the Romans conquer the world. How else do you think they became that powerful? And how do you think they made that highly flammable flamethrower that could burn on water? That was obviously me."
That name vanished off the list, and Raul Pearson was left remaining.
"Now who's Raul Pearson?" Lorenzo asked. "Isn't Raul a Spanish name? So is it that Spanish dude who threw rocks at you in chapter 2?"
"Who is writing this story?" Bob asked. "A fellow by the name of realepearson. Now does Raul Pearson and realepearson sound similar or what?"
"But how are we gonna beat the person who's writing this story?" Lorenzo said. "He's more god than god if he's making this entire story, and he's writing this conversation as well!"
"Yeah, but I'm gonna let you in on a little secret," Bob said, and leaned in to whisper into Lorenzo's ear. It was inaudible what Bob said to Lorenzo, but it must have been incredibly important if Lorenzo looked extremely excited after it.
"Now, don't talk about that, ever," Bob said. "If you talk about that, the author will grow a brain and figure out that he can make us say it out loud instead of whispering it."
"But how are we gonna beat him?" Lorenzo asked. "You just told me something else, not how to beat him."
"We don't," Bob said. "At least not right now, because we want to keep living, right? Now, I will teleport us to Viridian Forest, and I will make us not be able to teleport after that, since the author will just make us teleport whenever he feels like it."
Bob and Lorenzo both glowed blue and appeared in front of the real Viridian Forest this time, the one in Kanto. They wouldn't be able to use cheap teleportation anymore for plot convenience.
"Forget about what we were saying before now," Bob said. "We are a duo of blissfully ignorant trainers, on a completely original quest for you to become a pokemon master, right?"
"Yeah!" Lorenzo said. "Whatever you said."
"What did I say?" Bob asked. "I want you to repeat it."
Lorenzo sighed, "We are blissfully ignorant trainers on a completely original quest for me to become a pokemon master," he said.
"Good, now let us continue," he said. "And remember, I can't talk in front of other people, so do not try to ask me questions."
They walked along the path, with Bob disguised as a bulbasaur. They ignored all of the pokemon they saw, because Lorenzo considered them to be incredibly "weak and unworthy pokemon which would only weigh down the team".
They were walking along the path, wondering why they were even doing this instead of teleporting directly to Pewter City, but before they could regret that, someone popped out of the bushes and startled them.
This someone was an extremely scrawny twelve year old with a samurai helmet, naruto headband, dragon ball z gi, and sandals for some reason.
"I am Washichi Shige, and you intrude on my territory!" he screamed for no reason. "For this, I challenge you to a duel of honor! We will do a sword duel and you must head back if you get defeated, and if you beat me, you proceed."
"And what prevents me from walking past you and ignoring this whole 'duel of honor'?" Lorenzo asked. "Nothing, so if you'll pardon me, I have places t-"
"YOU ARE NOT GOING ANYWHERE!" the weeaboo yelled, pointing a katana at Lorenzo's nose. "NOT UNTIL YOU HAVE SOME HONOR AND ADMIT TO MY DUEL!"
"Fine, so how does it work?" Lorenzo asked. "Do we try to kill each other with swords, or do we just have a normal pokemon battle?"
"You will get a sword and will duel my pokemon and myself," he said. "If you are able to render us all unconscious, you may pass."
The weeaboo then pulled out two pokeballs and let them fall to the floor. Out of them came two beedrills, the only pokemon in the forest that had correlation with blades.
"Yeah, but where will I get a sword?" Lorenzo asked. "Isn't giving your opponent a fair chance to attack you being honorable?"
"Very well," the wannabe samurai said, and then pulled out another katana from another sheath. "Now you are ready for the duel, and it will begin with a count of three."
Lorenzo gripped the katana's hilt and wondered why he was doing this in the first place. He could probably walk faster than this kid too.
The weeaboo charged with his katana and swung it wildly in the general direction of Lorenzo. He obviously didn't know how to use it. Why waste money on a weapon you can't even use?
Lorenzo easily sidestepped the weeb and tapped his blade on the neck of the weeaboo.
"There," he said. "I got your neck with it, so do I win now? Or is this a fight to the death?"
"It is not a fight to the death," the samurai said. "You have done well and honorably, and may now pass the dangerous Viridian Forest now that you have proven you have the skills necessary to transgress it."
The samurai sheathed his sword, got the other one Lorenzo borrowed back, and took a bow before Lorenzo. The latter figured he should do the same to seem honorable, so he also bowed. He thought this was a waste of time.
Lorenzo then slowly walked backwards back onto the path, continuing his trek across the forest. That was an utter waste of time. How was that kid not dead yet? Some person who had malicious intent would have easily killed him,
Washichi Shige looked back at Lorenzo walking down the path. His job as a guardian was incredibly easy. He actually knew how to use the katana very well, and kept track of whoever had malicious intent and was walking down the forest, so that he could end any criminal or potential criminal by the duel. Lorenzo was a good hearted boy, he knew that for sure.
Lorenzo continued down the path, and eventually saw a sign welcoming any visitors to Pewter City. It wasn't as long as he thought it was, primarily because he ignored all of the pokemon because he didn't want to catch any of them.
"Hey Bob, what's the Pewter City gym leader's specialty?" Lorenzo asked. "I know his name is Brock, but that doesn't give off that many hints."
"What does Brock rhyme with?" Bob asked. "No, I can make it much simpler than that. Take away one letter from Brock, and what do you have?"
"Bock," Lorenzo said. "No wait, rock! He's a rock type specialist!"
"Very good, Lorenzo," Bob said, who felt like he was talking to a toddler. "Now what's your plan to beat him, because I know all of his pokemon also double as ground types for some reason."
"I don't plan things out," Lorenzo said. "Making plans just means you'll have to think more, and being successful without thinking too much is a good thing."
Bob shrugged and they went to find the Pewter City Gym, which was pretty hard to miss. It was a gigantic stone building with stone decorations outside of it.
Lorenzo walked up to it and knocked on the door politely, and no one responded.
"Just walk in, Lorenzo," Bob said, now disguised as a squirtle. "Gym leaders don't open doors for trainers because it removes the dramatic effect from the environment, ya know."
Lorenzo opened the doors, and he noticed the gym wasn't as large as the Viridian City gym, but it was very dark. Fortunately, Lorenzo could see very well in the dark because his parents locked him in a closet for 5 hours if he did something stupid. As anyone can guess, he spent the majority of his time in there.
"I can see you, Brock," Lorenzo said. "I've come to get a gym badge and stuff. I challenge you to a battle."
The lights suddenly turned on, and Lorenzo could see someone, but and he didn't look like Brock for some reason.
"Actually, I'm not Brock, but Craig instead," he said. "I'm the travelling substitute gym leader in case they're off on a ridiculous journey to find a mega stone or something. This time, Brock is off in Pallet Town betraying someone, so I will be battling you instead."
'So he's one of the people betraying that edgy kid who went to Mt. Silver,' Lorenzo thought. 'I'll have to thank him later for allowing a world tournament to happen.'
Craig started by sending out a steelix, and Lorenzo, of course, sent out Bob, who was still a squirtle.
"Wait, isn't Steelix a steel and ground type?" Lorenzo asked. "That isn't a rock type."
"Bruno from the elite four has three onixes, none of which are fighting types," Craig responded. "So it's perfectly legal."
"God dammit Craig," Lorenzo said. "Can't you just have a little integrity, Craig?"
"I can't," he said. "The moment my parents named me Craig, I knew I had to be the worst person in existence and make everyone say, 'Dammit Craig'."
"Dammit Craig," Lorenzo said again.
"Steelix, mega evolve!" Craig said, touching a button on a weird bracelet which glowed, causing Steelix to change form into a cooler version of it, with crystals to further the coolness.
"Dammit Craig," Lorenzo said. "This is my second gym badge Craig! Ever!"
"Steelix, use precipice blades!" Craig yelled. "Before Lorenzo can say anything!"
Steelix slammed down its huge head on the ground, causing blades to stick out of the ground, hitting Bob soon afterwards.
"Dammit Craig," Lorenzo said. "Steelix can't even learn that move! And you distracted me from saying anything. Dammit Craig, those are dirty tactics!"
"Steelix, finish him off with earthquake!" he yelled, ignoring Lorenzo completely.
Steelix did as told and once again, slammed its head on the ground and caused shock waves to fly around the arena. Bob was hit by this also, but to no effect. He was clearly getting agitated, this Craig guy was the worst person on the planet.
Lorenzo sighed, "Bob, use hydro pump," he said.
Bob grinned, finally doing something, and hit Steelix head on with a full power hydro pump, causing the latter to faint instantly.
"My steelix was level 90!" Craig yelled. "Your squirtle can't be more than level 16!"
"Dammit Craig!" Lorenzo yelled. "Why were you using a level 90 on someone with one gym badge? And now I demand my gym badge, because Bob and I won fairly."
"No, I am keeping my gym badge, thank you very much," Craig said.
"I beat up Professor Pencil at Viridian Gym physically for a gym badge," Lorenzo said. "Do you want the same thing to happen to you? I'd get you on Channel 6 news as well!"
"It's all yours!" Craig said, obviously scared by a 10 year old. Craig then flicked off a gym badge and ran for his life in the other direction, outside of the gym, most likely to snitch on Lorenzo and get fifty dollars for doing so.
"I got my second gym badge!" Lorenzo exclaimed, holding it up to the sky.
"Who are you showing it to by doing that?" Bob asked, who shifted into a bulbasaur.
"I dunno," he said. "It makes me look cool and get more self esteem."
The duo then exited the gym and started to walk to the next city to get a gym badge: Cerulean City. They started on Route 3 and started just walking down the primarily empty path.
"Lorenzo, you know how you are saying that you won't catch a single pokemon besides me?" Bob asked. "Well, what about those matches that require more than one pokemon, and what about double battles?"
"You can split into two pokemon, right?" Lorenzo asked. "You can just do that, and I can recall you in battles requiring more than one pokemon and you can shift into another form, and just say you are a different pokemon entirely."
"But if you really want to be a master, wouldn't you have more than one pokemon?" Bob asked. "That's kind of the entire goal, to be able to do very well with all kinds of them, and not just me. There are tournaments where you get other pokemon besides your own and are expected to do well with them in the World Tournament. They thought all this through, ya know."
"But what am I going to catch?" Lorenzo asked. "And how do I know which pokemon are good and bad? How do I train pokemon?"
"That's what you need to know to become a master," Bob said. "That's why there are only 64 people in the world tournament, since most people just give up once they realize it actually takes effort to become a master.
"Okay then, I'll catch a pokemon in Mt. Moon then," Lorenzo said. "I heard they're pretty good, and Mt. Moon is just ahead."
"And also, any pokemon can be incredibly good with enough training," Bob said. "In fact, a greatly trained magikarp can beat a legendary pokemon that wasn't trained very much."
"But how do you train?" Lorenzo asked.
"That's where you come in," Bob said. "You're the trainer, so it's your responsibility to train your multiple pokemon. Fortunately, I've been alive for literal millenium, so I can just tell you how the dastardly Romans trained their pokemon. To be honest, I don't think two league champions could step up to a single Roman pokemon novice."
"How did they do it?" Lorenzo asked, eager to learn about the ancient ways.
"Now, this may sound extremely harsh, but they put their pokemon through a pain game," Bob said. "The Romans thought up of every single torture method they thought of, but they first explained what they were going to do to their pokemon and why so that the pokemon wouldn't mistrust them. After taking every torture method from the book and using each of them on their pokemon, the result was a mentally and physically durable machine. As for attack, they made their pokemon fight literal mountains and made them destroy the whole thing with their bare abilities. With speed, they made their pokemon run ten miles away from yours truly every day."
"That seems really harsh," Lorenzo said.
"Isn't that what I started the whole thing with?" Bob asked. "And they conquered the world that way. The rest of the soft, squishy world didn't stand a chance against their cruel but effective ways."
"Okay, but where am I going to find torture methods and mountains?" Lorenzo asked. "I mean, all of the mountains are already occupied, like Mt. Moon has a lot of people inside of it currently."
"You know, it would be really nice if you had a pokemon who could shapeshift into literally anything, can shapeshift into many things as long as he split apart, and splitting apart could happen infinitely, and could do all of that at light speed," Bob said; he was really tired of Lorenzo not realizing what the former could do.
"Yeah, that would be nice," Lorenzo said. "Did they conquer the world to get more mountains or something, and how do you know all of the pokemon's strength? Did they hit you a lot or something?"
Bob, at this point decided an idiot like Lorenzo was the type of person who would only learn from show and not tell. Bob looked around himself, and saw that they were now in a desert portion of Route 3, before Mt. Moon. It was very flat and had no people, monuments, or structures around the place where they were in a five mile radius.
Bob split in two and part of him grabbed Lorenzo, and the other half threw the two of them about five miles away, to make sure Lorenzo doesn't get harmed.
Lorenzo didn't expect that, but a mountain was now in front of him for some reason. He was extremely confused.
"Did you create a mountain?" Lorenzo asked.
"No, half of me became the mountain," Bob explained.
"Oh, that's what you were getting at," Lorenzo said. "I understand now."
Bob sighed in relief. Things were getting better between the two of them, and Bob realized that he would have to be very patient if he wanted to be Lorenzo's pokemon.
The mountain suddenly disappeared and the two Bob's merged together again.
"So, any other questions before we move on to Mt. Moon and you hopefully catch a pokemon?" Bob asked.
"Yeah," Lorenzo said. "How will I catch the pokemon if I don't have any pokeballs?"
Bob pointed an arm at what seemed to be a pokecenter right outside of Mt. Moon.
"There's a place where you can buy pokeballs, and I don't even think you signed up for the league tournament yet, ya know, the thing you should do if you want to compete," Bob said. "I can just stretch us all the way over there, because honestly, I'm quite tired of rolling across this sand, and I'm pretty sure you are to. And when was there a desert portion before Mt. Moon? Has pollution really gotten this bad?"
Bob grabbed Lorenzo and stretched his jello-like body across the desert to the pokemon center. They opened the doors and walked in; Lorenzo's first time in a pokemon center.
Bob immediately shifted into a less conspicuous charmander, and he watched as Lorenzo walked up to the nurse.
"Can I sign up for the Indigo League tournament?" he asked to her.
"I don't know, can you?" the nurse responded.
"Yeah," Lorenzo said, not noticing what she was asking for.
Bob angrily looked up at Lorenzo, but there was nothing he could do because he couldn't talk in public, otherwise Lorenzo's life would be put on the news and all the teams from all the regions would be after Bob, just like all those decades back.
The nurse also sighed, "Look, I'll just sign you up, but I'll need to borrow your pokedex for a second if you want to sign up."
Bob realized Lorenzo did not have a pokedex because he sent Professor Pencil to the hospital, he grabbed a wrong starter, and Professor Pencil is now dead. Bob's quick thinking split a part of him off and made it into a pokedex programmed with all of Lorenzo's information.
Lorenzo checked all of his pockets, but couldn't find it.
"What does a pokedex look like?" Lorenzo asked. "I don't think I received one."
"I think you dropped it on the floor," she pointed out right next to Lorenzo's "charmander".
Lorenzo bent over and picked it up and gave it to the nurse.
She scanned it and logged him in to the tournament.
"You're all signed up for the tournament, Lorenzo," she said.
"Thanks, but where can I buy pokeballs?" Lorenzo asked.
The nurse pointed to a stand located to the east, labeled with 'pokeballs'. Lorenzo then walked over to the stand and looked up at all of the pokeball options, about seven of them.
"Can I help you?" the clerk asked. "Would you be interested in buying some pokeballs?"
"Yeah!" Lorenzo said. "I'll take twenty normal ones, please."
The clerk ducked beneath the stand and returned with twenty one pokeballs, one being a gold color.
"Here are your twenty pokeballs, for a total of $40.00," the clerk said. "And if you want a bonus pokemon which also can become an incredibly strong, rare, sought after pokemon, why don't you pay for a good deal of $5.00 extra?"
Lorenzo felt a tug on his pant leg and looked down at his "charmander" shaking his head no, but he ignored that.
"You've got me sold!" Lorenzo yelled, reaching for his wallet. He then opened it up and withdrew four ten dollar bills and one five dollar bill, and gave that to the salesman.
"Have fun with your new, strong pokemon!" the salesman exclaimed after Lorenzo left the pokecenter.
"Lorenzo, are you stupid?" Bob asked as they were heading towards Mt. Moon.
"Yeah, why?" Lorenzo responded with.
"You do realize that was a scam, right?" Bob said. "The man said it can become a extremely strong pokemon, meaning it's probably an extremely weak pokemon like magikarp or rattata."
"But didn't you say that magikarps can beat legendary pokemon if they are trained hard enough?" Lorenzo countered with.
"Oh yeah?" Bob asked. "I bet that magikarp has been given and everstone and can't evolve."
"How do you even know if it's a magikarp or not?" Lorenzo asked. "You're just assuming at this point."
Bob grabbed the golden pokeball from off Lorenzo's waist, took gold wrapping off of the pokeball, revealing it to be just a normal pokeball, and then he threw it at the ground.
Unsurprisingly, a magikarp came out of the ball, flopping around in delight. Surprisingly, it was a golden magikarp and flopped happily to Lorenzo and nuzzled up against his leg.
"Aren't magikarps orange?" Lorenzo asked Bob.
"Yes, yes they are," Bob said in confusion. "This magikarp just so happens to be a shiny one, and I'm guessing the man breeds magikarp and never even looks inside the ball to see if it is rare or not. Shiny pokemon are extremely rare, by the way."
"So, now that we have a pokemon now, should we begin training now?" Lorenzo asked.
Bob looked back at Lorenzo with a devilish grin and nodded slowly.
one stupid training montage with a copyrighted song later
"How long did magikarp train for, Bob?" Lorenzo asked. "It felt like forever."
"Then your guess is right," Bob revealed. "I actually froze time just so magikarp could train even more, and now it seems like an extremely strong pokemon," Bob laughed. He should stop abusing his powers, but it was too fun to do.
"Now let's go roll through Mt. Moon and catch a pokemon," Lorenzo said, and off the duo went into the cavernous depths of the giant mountain.
They noticed the cave was extremely bright for something, and there were no pokemon in sight. Even an idiot like Lorenzo could figure out something was wrong with this picture.
"You know what, Bob?" Lorenzo said. "I think we should take a different approach to Mt. Moon."
"What is your different approach, Lorenzo?" Bob asked. "Is it tunneling underground to the other side?"
"Better!" Lorenzo exclaimed. "We're gonna climb the mountain and see all of the fascinating pokemon ON Mt. Moon!"
They then exited the cavern and looked up. Bob immediately knew Lorenzo wasn't going to actually climb the mountain by himself, so he grabbed him and stretched upwards to the top of the mountain. The top of the mountain was very lush, having a lot of wildlife on top of it, in contrast to the vast desert beneath it.
"That's weird," Lorenzo said.
"What's weird?" Bob asked.
"In all of the TV shows and documentaries that I've ever seen, the top of Mt. Moon is always a dry, rocky place that you can access by entering the cavern," he explained.
Bob became a dragonite all of a sudden and blasted a hyper beam through the floor they were standing on, but a little far away. He then shifted back into a ditto and looked down the hole with Lorenzo.
"Hey, that looks exactly like the top of Mt. Moon I saw in all of those documentaries and TV shows," Lorenzo said.
"It's a fake ceiling," Bob explained. "That means someone or something is hiding something at the top of Mt. Moon. We're gonna figure out who is hiding what here."
They then walked across the forest on Mt. Moon and immediately encountered a building not far from where the center was. As if they knew Lorenzo was coming, the people who owned and used it put their emblem onto the building as to show that it is indeed theirs: Team Rocket.
"I hate Team Rocket," Lorenzo declared loudly to Bob.
"Any reason why?" Bob asked.
Lorenzo grabbed Bob and threw him at the building as hard as he could, as if he wanted him to destroy the building.
"I HAVE A HERO COMPLEX!" Lorenzo yelled.
Bob let this happen, and quickly thought of the quickest method to get rid of this rather large building. He shifted into a mountain, just big enough to not destroy the entirety of Mt. Moon, and let it crush the building, along with the unfortunate saps who were present inside of it.
Bob then came back as a boomerang to Lorenzo, who caught Bob.
"Now what, Lorenzo?" Bob asked. "You completely trashed a potential story arc that would have taken another chapter, and you trashed even more because team rocket won't even know you did it."
"I can fix that," Lorenzo said, and pulled a can of spray paint out of thin air, but not really. The air was kinda thick on the top of Mt. Moon.
Lorenzo walked over to the ruins and spray painted, 'LORENZO DOUGLASS DID THIS. COME AFTER ME AND CREATE A FILLER ARC SO BOB WON'T GET MAD AT ME'.
"Now, we make our getaway," Lorenzo said, and Bob stretched them both across all the way to the Cerulean gym.
"Now we fight the gym leader here at Cerulean gym," Lorenzo said. "Wow, that was actually kinda fast."
"Hey Lorenzo, weren't you gonna catch a pokemon at Mt. Moon?" Bob asked.
"Yeah, I did when I threw you at the building," Lorenzo said and pulled out a pokeball from his belt.
"But what did you catch?" Bob asked.
"You think I know the names of all the pokemon in the world?" Lorenzo asked.
"Well, all of your pokemon and information is recorded on your pokedex, the one you hopefully did not lose," Bob said.
"Oh yeah," Lorenzo said and pulled out his pokedex, and then checked his pokemon.
"I caught a ditto!" Lorenzo exclaimed. "Oh wait, that's just you. I caught a Mega Mawile!"
"But that's not even possible!" Bob said. "That's a pokemon from Hoenn, and a rare one at that as well! And you don't catch mega pokemon in the wild, and you wouldn't be able to catch it unless you weakened it first."
In a blink and you'll miss it moment, Bob all of a sudden noticed a portal with numbers flashing on the other side of it. This was the chance he was waiting decades to perform. He grabbed Lorenzo and jumped in the portal before it could vanish and he would have to wait another decade or so.
The environment and the people all around Lorenzo and Bob faded away. They were now in what seemed to be a child's room, with planets on the ceiling, a bed, and a desk with a computer on it.
"I've got you now, Raul Pearson!" Bob declared heroically. "Your endless tyranny over this world will now end!"
The chair in front of the computer turned around, and a 12 year old boy was rubbing a cat that was on his lap for some reason, just like a James Bond villain.
"Wel, wel, wel, ive bin ekspecting u," Raul said.
"Have you now?" Bob asked. "You didn't make that canonical error in the story on purpose, and I know that by reading your mind."
Lorenzo started charging at Raul for no apparent reason, and the former was lifted in the air by an unknown force. Lorenzo was thrown out of the window and landed on the driveway outside.
"Nw itz juts u n mee," Raul said. "Maek ur mov. Im waytin."
Bob made a pillar of spikes arise from underneath raul, but Raul teleported in front of Bob and swung a ban hammer at Bob, who dodged under it and avoided the blow completely. This would obviously go on forever, since both of them were practically omnipotent.
Lorenzo got up in a daze from the ground and looked and saw that he was thrown off the second floor. He knew he wanted to be apart of the fight, so he scanned his brain for a solution. Then he got it. He'd seen the same thing in numerous video games.
Lorenzo started to wait on the road outside of the house, and he saw that a car was coming. He quickly grabbed the sign saying the street number of the house and swung it at the car, hitting it dead on and shattering the windows.
The driver came out, who was a big burly man carrying a baseball bat. Lorenzo gulped. This was going to be one heck of a fight.
The driver then swung the bat at Lorenzo, who ducked underneath it and grabbed the large weapon. However, this had little effect as the big man just took it right back out of Lorenzo's hands.
The man then began chasing Lorenzo, still wielding a bat in his hands. Lorenzo was frantically trying to think of a solution to defeat the big man, then thought of a good one.
Lorenzo ran towards the car and used his small size to crawl underneath it. The big man wouldn't be able to follow him, but the big man quickly thought of a counter to that.
The big man dropped his bat, went into the driver's seat of the car, and started it; he was going to run Lorenzo over.
Lorenzo exited the underneath quickly and and opened the man's gas chamber. He pulled out the spray paint from earlier and had a plan, looking at the HIGHLY FLAMMABLE warning on the can.
The man was about to push the pedal, but he smelled smoke. Then his car exploded, along with the man inside.
The explosion was very loud, and it was just powerful enough to knock the man unconscious. Lorenzo then picked up the discarded baseball bat and the dismantled car parts.
With the parts, he built a makeshift ladder to the 2nd floor and stepped in with the bat. Bob and Raul were doing moves on each other, both of them blocking the other's moves completely.
Lorenzo stealthily snuck past the battle and behind Raul. Right when he was attacking, Lorenzo swung the bat as hard as he could at the back of Raul's head, knocking the 12 year old boy unconscious.
Bob then looked upon Raul and decided to finish the tyrant who controlled the lives of millions unfairly now. Bob's hand became a knife, and he cut right into Raul's neck, killing him instantly.
Once Raul's throat was cut open, the environment around Lorenzo and Bob quickly changed to the Cerulean gym once again.
"What happened?" Lorenzo asked. "And why did I help kill that guy?"
"Raul Pearson happened," Bob started to explain. "The tyrant of this entire work of fiction. He toyed around with the lives of whoever was in his story just for the fun of it. Once I noticed he made an error in the story that could not be explained in a moment's notice, I had my chance to transport us to the domain of Raul, so I took it. The reason why I took you is because I knew two unstoppable forces colliding into each other would result in an endless battle. So then I realized that 101 is more powerful than 100. We have just saved the entire polyverse, Lorenzo."
"But if he was the writer of this, now what will happen to us?" Lorenzo asked. "Why are we not dead?"
"A better author found us," Bob said. "Now, you can fulfill your dream in peace."
"But where's the fun in that?" Lorenzo said. "You just eliminated the conflict of this entire story in less than a moment's notice. Now what?"
"Well, here's the thing, kid," Bob said. "I kinda lied about that part, and I'm gonna be honest with ya. That was the central conflict of the story, so now the story will have to end, just like all things. Except the pokemon anime. That'll go on forever. The most I can do in my power is reset the polyverse, so you will have a new life with a new story, new author, and a different plot. What I meant by fulfill your dreams in peace was in another life, without an all powerful ditto following you around everywhere."
"Is that why all of the world is being enveloped in green numbers?" Lorenzo asked through tears. "And Bob, I'll miss you for sure."
"Wanna have a beer and watch the end of the world with me?" Bob asked, pulling two beers and lawn chairs out of nowhere. "It's not illegal if it's the end of the polyverse."
"Sure thing," Lorenzo said while crying.
Soon, the green numbers were reaching them.
"Well, kid, I'll see you in the next life," Bob said. "And to be fair to you in the next life, I'll give ya the memories of everything we've been through and this life's memories. It's the only power I have left at this point, but it will surely do something."
Lorenzo and Bob clinked their beers together for the first and last time and chugged them down as they too got enveloped in the green numbers.
A/N: Would you prefer me to continue this or not? Because I would be able to still continue it, or are you fine with this ending? Would you want me to write about the new life of Lorenzo Douglass and Bob and let them find each other? If interested, send an email to myfaceistoostrong , and I will respond to you if I hear you. Or just leave a review. You don't even need an account to make reviews.