Again a little bit LH in this chapter.
10
The ride to Lady Heather's house was silent. Sara was wondering what was going on in Grissom's head.
She could see the determination grow stronger.
He was berating himself for having given in to Sara. Usually he was not that insecure. No, he had to rely on his strong points.
Sara would not enter Heather's house.
He would not let her dictate everything.
When they arrived, he made no move to get out of the car.
Sara kept quiet for almost ten minutes until she could not hold it in anymore.
"Grissom, why won't we get out of the car?"
"I'll get out. You're gonna wait for me here," Grissom ordered in a firm voice.
He looked at Sara and the determination in his eyes surprised her.
On the one hand, she was glad that Grissom was not hesitant and about to hole himself up in a corner, but that also meant that her position was not that strong anymore.
Should she simply insist on it? Plead with him, trying to convince him? Or just wait and see what he decided?
"Why don't you want me to go with you?" she asked carefully.
"Please, Sara. That should be obvious. This is about my private life."
"And I have no place in it. I get it."
Sara sounded sad, and she was close to giving up.
"I don't understand you. If there's ever supposed to be an 'us' then you'll have to take me along. If you exclude me now, you exclude me from your life. You don't believe in a future for us."
"Sara, I don't want you with me because I want to believe in our future. If you talk to Heather…"
"Then I'll see another side of you," Sara completed his sentence.
"What are you scared of?"
"Damnit, Sara. Are you that naive?" Grissom couldn't hold it in any longer.
"There's a sex video of me. Do you know what that means?"
He turned to face Sara and shook her.
"How could you ever forgive me? When you look at me, what will you think?"
Sara was silent; there was nothing she could say.
His fear was justified. She couldn't promise him that everything stayed as it was.
"Could you still touch me? Kiss and love me?"
Grissom moved closer.
"Tell me that I'm wrong. If I kiss you now, will that be our last kiss?"
He kissed her without giving Sara a chance to object.
Hard and demanding. So full of passion that Sara almost forgot all of her arguments.
She opened her mouth slightly and moaned as Grissom took her up on her invitation.
His hands traveled along her body. If he gave into his desires and interpreted Sara's reaction correctly, he could have made love to her at that moment.
In his car.
In front of Heather's house.
When that thought registered, he pulled back carefully.
In front of Heather's house, dear god.
What was he doing?
"Sara, honey. We've to stop."
As if to comfort her, he placed small light butterfly kisses along her face.
"Okay?"
She just nodded. He was right, she knew that. Of course they had to stop. But the feelings that Grissom stirred in her, she couldn't put them into words. Much better than her fantasy.
She didn't move, neither pulling away from the other, until Grissom asked, "Are you okay?"
"Yes, but you couldn't kiss away my arguments."
This time she was right. He had to grant her access to every part of his being. They would only have a chance if she got to know the real him. If not, something would always stand between them.
"Alright, let's go," he finally gave in.
"But," he kissed her once more, "let me talk. Just observe everything closely. Alright?"
Sara smiled. "Alright."
11
On the way to the house, Grissom was tempted to take her hand. However, he knew that that was not the best way to show up at Heather's place.
He rang the bell and immediately, a young woman appeared who let them in without waiting for an explanation.
Sara looked around curiously. She had been involved in the previous cases, but she had never been there.
Grissom, on the other hand, knew his way around. He walked in front of her and in doing so, protected Sara from the eyes of the girls.
Finally, they stood in front of a door and he knocked.
Instead of the usual 'come in,' the door opened and Lady Heather was standing in front of them.
Sara tried to observe without being obvious.
She knew from the police report that Lady Heather was younger than her, but they seemed to be so different that she couldn't make a comparison. Sara felt very young and inexperienced. Heather was an exotic woman. Her hair style, the makeup – everything contributed to a mysterious aura.
Deliberately, she held out her cheek for Grissom to kiss, but he just ignored it.
"Dr. Grissom. Is this an official visit?"
He nodded silently.
"Heather, this is my colleague, Sara Sidle."
Heather looked at the tall slender woman next to Grissom with interest.
So this was the famous Sara Sidle. For a long time, Heather had been wondering what she looked like and now she finally got to meet her.
"Nice to meet you, Sara," she greeted the other woman friendly.
TBC