M'gann's eyes glowed a brilliant green. Her hands touched her temples and she hovered only six inches off the ground. An eerie wind gusted through the indoor training room and the air seemed to pulsate as the Martian gritted her teeth and objects around her seemed to abandon the laws of gravity. At first glance it seemed as if she was performing magic, but the floating objects and the inexplicable wind were mere side effects of her true intent. M'gann was attempting to communicate telepathically with her Uncle J'onn (the Martian Manhunter) who was twenty miles (32 Kilometers) away. As part of her routine training M'gann was practicing expanding the range of her telepathic communication.
M'gan- . . . -ere. . . -Can y-. . . -hea- After twenty minutes of stretching her mind she was finally hearing snippets of her Uncle.
Uncle J'onn? Uncle J'onn? Can you hear me? She called out hopefully.
M'gann! Excellent work! This is the farthest you have ever been able to communicate! I am so very proud. M'gann smiled at her Uncle's praise, and bade him farewell given that training was now complete. The training room returned to its normal state, except for one small thing. A small device had fallen from an air vent in the ceiling. It largely resembled a cockroach minus the fact that it was made of metal, had extremely long antennae, and had a small red light on its back blinking at a rapid, but steady pace. It was officially called a B.C.B.A.M.
Batman had contingency plans against all members of the league, such as his kryptonite supply for Superman, should any of them go rogue or become victim to mind control. The B.C.B.A.M. was the Bat Contingency Bug Against Martians. Its sole purpose was to create a telepathic disturbance so extreme, any Martian (or telepath) in the vicinity would be temporarily crippled from the unbearable screeching it would play in their minds. It could also be reprogrammed to emit noises other than screeching.
Robin sat up in the air vent with a fist in his mouth, practically choking in an effort to keep from laughing. The eyes on his domino mask were abnormally wide and the thirteen year old was practically shaking. His tenth cup of coffee was finished, the only trace that it ever existed was the faint coffee-stash left on the boy's upper lip. He pressed the play button on the holocomupter on his wrist, leaning against the vent to peer into the training room and witness his masterpiece.
M'gann gasped and put her hands over her ears. What was going on? Was he being psychically attacked? Had Psimon discovered the location to the cave? And why would he be attacking her with horrible, trashy techno music? She was about to make a counter attack when the music was replaced by something much, much worse. It was a recording of Wally earlier that morning after Artemis had shot him square in his right butt cheek. But this recording had been remixed to the beat and tune of "Anaconda" by Nicki Minaj.
You shot me in the butt.
You shot me in the butt.
I can't believe you shot, shot me in the butt.
(continues with rest of putrid rap)
M'gann crumpled to the floor, yelling "Make it stop! Make it stop! Make it stop". She hated Nicki Minaj with a burning passion; her music was trash, her videos were trash, she went way too crazy on the plastic surgery that kind of made her look like M'gann's nutty Aunt Kaliki back on Mars. Aunt Kaliki often drank too much Bancha Juice (a type of Martian alcohol) and would end up running around the village square shouting and hitting people with her broom. Not to mention Nicki Minaj's music was the equivalent of regurgitated curdled milk, but in sound form.
Ten minutes had passed and the "music" was still going on. At this point M'gann was just lightly banging her head into the padded wall of the training room, repeating the same thing with each tap.
"Butt. Butt. Butt. Butt. Butt."
Aqualad walked into the room and upon laying eyes on his clearly distressed teammate, he approached her with a furrowed brow.
"M'gann. Are you alright?" he asked. More banging and repeating of "butt". Aqualad back out of the room and sprinted down the hall.
"Batman, you much come quickly! I believe there is something wrong with Miss Martian!" Aqualad said calmly but urgently to the Dark Knight.
When they both arrived back at the training room M'gann was still butting her head against the wall. (PUNS! YAY!)
"Miss Martian, are you alright? What is wrong?" Batman asked, lifting the poor girl up from the floor.
"Butts" was her only reply.
The Dark Night raised a single eyebrow under his cowl. He knew what was going on. He had seen the same side effects on Martian Manhunter when he had first tested the B.C.B.A.M. He handed the dazed young woman to Aqualad, who was standing silent, though clearly confused. Batman scanned the room and walked over to a set of weights, picked up a small electronic device, and crushed it in his hand.
M'gann gave a start and rapidly.
"Oh my goodness. What on earth just happened? That was horrible. I believe I would consider that cruel and unusual punishment." stuttered M'gann.
"That, was Robin." replied Batman. "Probably doing KF a favor after you tricked him into gettin shot. But terrorizing is't really his style of payback. He just like goofy pranks, unless.." Batman trailed off. He walked over to the nearest air vent and ripped it open, reaching inside his hand brushed a plastic object; he grabbed it and pullet it out.
"Uh-oh." he stated gravely, staring at the empty coffee cup in his hand.