Chapter Three:

So Far, So Good

Loredas 26 Evening Star 4E 190 11:30PM

"Wake up, whelp!" Tralen growled as he kicked my side. "Time to hunt." I whimpered, which resulted in another kick to my side. Slowly, I opened my eyes and pulled the furs over my body tightly.

After my first transformation, my clothes were destroyed and I didn't like it when Tralen had watched me when he tracked me down near the White River after I had transformed back.

My heart started to thump unevenly at the mention of hunting again. It hurt, Gods, did it hurt. It felt like I was being ripped apart by ice wolves, sabrecats, and giants all at once. "I-I'm not hungry," I replied as I sat up and scurried away from the large Redguard. My stomach snarled in disagreement.

Snarling at me, he gripped my ankle roughly, and I screamed as he dragged me across the rough cave floor. "You don't have a choice, whelp. It's nearly midnight and there's plenty of prey to choose from." I shook, unable to say a word and Tralen narrowed his eyes at me. "If you don't transform, I will make you!"

My eyes snapped to his gold ones. "Like how you made me drink your blood—?!" I yelped as hot tears streamed down my face. My cheek was stinging from the impact of his large hand and I didn't need to touch it to know that it was red.

"I blessed you with the Beast Blood. You're stronger, faster, better than you were before!" I looked at him, my eyes red and puffy from being slapped. "You will transform, even if I have to beat you in order for it to happen."

I shook as his grip on my ankle increased, my heart starting to beat erratically. I screamed as he kicked me again.

As he kicked me, I kept screaming. I heard the distance sound of a howl. It wasn't a regular, wild wolf. This was something entirely different. Tralen turned his head, giving me the chance I needed and I scampered away, into the hiding hole I had made weeks ago. He didn't know about it—at least not yet.

"Gods-dammit!" He turned his head back to where I was before and I could see anger flashing through his eyes. "Get back here, whelp!" He started searching for me, but I kept quiet (as quiet as my thudding heart would allow).

I closed my eyes, trying to find some form of safety, but I found none. "Ha!" I heard Tralen bark. My body tensed as I felt him grab my hair and yank me out of my hiding hole. "You think you can hide from me?" he growled into my ear. "You can never hide from me!"

He threw me into the center of the cave and the howls were getting nearer. "You led the Companions to us." Tralen stalked forward, his features highlighted as he walked near the smoldering fire he kept feeding every-now-and-then. "You're going to take care of them."

I shook my head abruptly and I regretted it as soon as I felt the embers sear my face and I finally snapped. Rather, the wolf within me snapped. With shaky hands, I tried to remove the furs from my body, failing miserably as I heard the cloth tearing and I saw Tralen grinning at me, his teeth already sharpened. The only thing I could do to blot out the mind-numbing pain was to close my eyes and pray to the Divines to make this transformation easy.

When I opened my eyes again, I was a wolf. My arms, legs, everything hurt—my head was pounding, as if Tralen had thrown me against the stone walls of the cave like the many other times. I closed my eyes, hoping to take a moment to rest, but a low, menacing growl reached my ears and I opened my eyes to see Tralen in his Beast form staring down at me. His large, sharp white teeth bared at me—a warning and a command in one.

As fast as I could, I got to my feet. When I was crouched on all fours, my tail between my legs, did Tralen raise his massive clawed hand and point to the entrance of the cave. I knew what he wanted, but I didn't want to hurt the Companions. I didn't do anything to them!

Sensing my hesitation, Tralen had opened his maw, clamped his teeth around the scruff of my neck, and shook me roughly until I yelped in submission. He released me, licking his muzzle as I caught the crimson that still lined it. I could feel the warm liquid matting my fur and I didn't like it. It reminded me too much of when he made me drink his blood.

Barking harshly at me, Tralen shoved me towards the entrance of the cave, biting my haunch in a second warning. Shaking as I walked out of the cave, I surveyed the forest around the cave and sniffed the air. If those howls were the Companions, they were upwind from me and I couldn't smell them.

I lifted my ears and listened intently, however, I heard a twig snap. Turning my head, I saw the massive wolf looming over the entrance of the cave, its gold eyes narrowed in confusion. The Werewolf snarled at me and I barked back (feeling pathetic while I did); prompting the Werewolf to jump down from its perch and landed on me.

I clawed at its chest, feeling smug when I heard it howl in agony and remove itself from me. I scrambled to my feet and circled it carefully, my teeth bared, a constant growl escaping into the wilderness, echoing through the forest. When I was behind it, I leapt and sank my teeth into its hind leg.

It took a few seconds, but I tasted the Werewolf's blood and my own mind started to fog with the bloodlust. I was still too young to fully control it, but it never stopped me from trying. I clamped my jaw tighter on the Werewolf's hind leg as the bloodlust clouded my mind, the adrenaline was coursing through my body and I craved more.

I tore a chunk of flesh from the Werewolf's leg and it howled in agony. I didn't let up. I kept biting, kept ripping. Eventually, I had sunk my claws into the Werewolf's stomach and slashed at it until my claws were a bright crimson. The throat, the dark voice growled in my mind.

With a swipe of my claw, I had slashed the Werewolf in the face, making the Werewolf turn its head, leaving its neck completely exposed. I felt my lips part over my muzzle, exposing them to the cold night air, and I lowered my head as my jaw clamped around the Werewolf's throat.

When the bloodlust was cleared, I observed the (now dead) Werewolf I was fighting (or feasting off of) and my eyes widened as I took in the corpse below me. It wasn't a wolf anymore. It was a man. A man that looked familiar to me.

Snow-white hair, snow-white beard, wide silver eyes, and war paint on the right side of his face; under his eye consumed my vision. The gaping hole in the Nord's throat, chest, and stomach was the first thing that you'd see. There was a pool of blood near his leg. Looking down, there was a huge gash in his leg, the flesh (and bone) were ripped away, as if they were pieces of parchment.

"Well done, whelp," Tralen said as he walked out from the cave, in his human form. "You killed the Harbinger of those glorified hounds in Whiterun." My eyes rested on the corpse, blood spattered the once green forest floor. I licked my muzzle as the bitter taste of blood traveled down my throat.

One thought was running through my mind:

I had killed Kodlak Whitemane.

Turdas 16 Second Seed 4E 199 9:25AM

I screamed as I shot upwards into a sitting position. My covers were tossed everywhere; one of the covers had a nice slash through the dark crimson cloth. I brought my hands up to my face and I felt my shoulders moving up and down erratically. Hot tears traveled down my cheeks and dripped onto the bed. Slowly, I lifted my head enough and examined my hands. Hands, they were still hands—but why is there a slash in the covers? I buried my face again, groaning and whimpering.

Keeping my face in my hands, I registered that my forehead was clammy and sweaty. No doubt from the nightmare I just endured. "By the Divines," I murmured hoarsely. Even my voice was distorted! Running a hand through my hair, I started to wonder if I had not started to transform in my sleep. It wouldn't have been the first time either. I'd transformed many times while I slept; Tralen had told me it was because I was weak, because I couldn't fight it.

Looking down, I was relieved that I was still in the tattered clothes that I had fallen asleep in. Sighing, I felt my heart slowing down, my mind starting to focus on where I was. I'm at the Jorrvaskr in Whiterun, Kodlak—the Harbinger—offered me a place among them. Kodlak! My eyes snapped to the door and I made to get up and make sure that Tralen didn't get to him, when I felt a small hand on my forearm.

"Skadi," a familiar, soft voice chimed, "are you okay?"

My eyes searched for the source of the noise, only to feel a hand gently guide my face to the Imperial woman—the woman that Taryn had called "Mom" earlier. Her green eyes were filled with worry; however, they were also soft with compassion. She waited patiently for an answer.

Afraid to use my voice, I nodded slowly. I wiped my eyes and nose, inhaling as I did so, and my eyes widened when I caught the faintest whiff of lavender. "What's that smell?" I asked.

The Imperial woman reached over, my eyes following her every move, and grabbed an empty bottle. "It's a potion that Kodlak had conjured up many years ago. It helped many times when we had new Circle members that couldn't control themselves after drinking the Beast Blood." She patted my arm gently.

"W-Why did you use it on me?" I rasped, my throat suddenly dry.

The Imperial woman sighed and looked at me. "You were transforming in your sleep, Skadi," the Imperial woman explained as she brushed my russet-colored hair aside so she could look at me. "Thankfully Taryn woke up and noticed that you were starting to transform and ran to get Kodlak."

I buried my face in my hands again. "I'm sorry," I murmured. I wanted to say something else, anything to make up for what had happened to the covers, when the Imperial woman scoffed and waved her hand.

"No worries, Skadi. You're not the first Werewolf to walk within these halls. Aela was the worst after her transformation. We had to replace her belongings almost every-other-day!" I grinned. "I don't think we've formally been introduced. My name's Elana," the Imperial, Elana, said. "You obviously saw the resemblance between Taryn and I?"

"Yes." I brought my hand to my throat. "Wh-Why am I so thirsty?" I asked.

Elana tapped the bottle again. "Wolfsbane Elixir. It's almost like a calming spell in a bottle." Elana poured some water from a pitcher, into a tankard, then she handed it to me. "It's a side-effect that Kodlak is trying to get rid of. A glass of water will take care of that thirst."

"But it's only created for Werewolves?" I took the tankard and sipped slowly.

Elana shrugged. "I guess so, I mean, it could be used for others." I nodded. Carefully, Elana had pushed my hair behind my ear and made a clicking noise with her tongue. "Tilma is going to have her hands full with you, my dear."

I was going to answer Elana, but the sound of someone running outside made me stop. "Mom!" My eyes darted to the door—to Taryn—and I relaxed (somewhat). "Is she—oh thank the Divines!" The relief in Taryn's voice was obvious when she spotted me.

Elana stood up, embracing her daughter. Taryn was taller than Elana, probably because of her Nord blood. Elana pulled away, patting Taryn's cheek as she did so. "Do you think you could help Skadi clean up a little bit? I'll see if Tilma has a spare set of clothes ready for Skadi after she's done cleaning."

"Of course," Taryn smiled.

She kissed Elana's cheek, Elana returned the gesture, and left promptly after doing so.

"Now," Taryn said as she looked at me, that smile still in place. "Let's get you cleaned up, all right?"

I gulped as I stood up, craning my head to look at the damage I had caused last night. "S-Sorry," I murmured. I was more upset that Taryn would've been hurt if she had not been smart to get her father.

Taryn shrugged. "It happens." She waved me forward, walking out of the room as she did so, and I followed her into the large hall. "Most of the Companions are upstairs eating or training. Some might still be out on contracts so you'll meet them later—hey!" Taryn exclaimed, making me jump. "Maybe you'll finally get to meet Hiemdall today! He had a contract somewhere in the Pale and is supposed to come back today."

"Okay," I replied as Taryn guided me to a separate area of Jorrvaskr. She pushed the double wooden doors aside and I saw a few wash basins, some racks for hanging clothing on, and a few chairs were scattered about the room. Observing the room closely, the steam was rising up from behind wooden walls that seemed to hide the source of the steam.

"Ah!" a feathery voice chimed. "Taryn, I thought that was you!"

My eyes rested on an elderly Nord woman with sharp silver hair (the color reminding me of my own silver eyes), a withered face, and a warm smile on her lips.

"Hey, Tilma, I'm glad you're here. I'm just helping the newest member, Skadi," Taryn explained, gesturing to me. "You obviously heard of how she was brought to us?"

Tilma walked over and picked my hand up. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Skadi. I hope you find your stay here comfortable." She nodded her head at Taryn, probably answering Taryn's question about how I was brought to the Companions.

"T-Thank you." Tilma released my hand.

"There's plenty of tubs to choose from," Tilma grinned. I walked down the aisle and picked the stall that was farthest from the door. I didn't know why I chose that spot, I just did.

After removing my clothes, I lowered myself into the warm water, a sigh escaping my mouth as the water relaxed my muscles. I grinned as I thought that I heard my inner wolf sigh at the same time.

"Tilma," I heard Taryn say from behind the wall that obscured the tub. "Is there a spare set of underclothes and a spare set of clothes for Skadi? My father, no doubt, loaned her what she was wearing when she arrived."

"Of course, dear, I'll get those right away for Skadi." The doors opened and closed as either Tilma or Taryn left the room. I didn't know—or care at the moment. The water was warmer, much warmer than the White River and the many small or large lakes that I swam in when I had to clean.

I lowered myself into the warm water, until the only visible feature was my head. It felt as though the water was washing away nine years of fear, pain, and every other emotion that I could think of.

Turdas 16 Second Seed 4E 199 12:26PM

Frantically, my eyes darted around the small market that was stationed in the Plains District. There were many people about, all oblivious to the danger that stood before them. The temptation was there, it was always there. It's been there for nine years.

The children that were darting in and out of the crowd made me uneasy, I was afraid that if they bumped into me, I might lose it, but I had to remind myself that I could do this. I felt my hands brush some of my hair aside (Taryn had shown me how to pull it back into a ponytail so that it wouldn't constantly fall in my face), a subtle habit of showing my nervousness.

"Hey," Taryn muttered as she touched my arm, "you okay? You look a little pale."

"F-Fine," I stammered. My hands ran up and down my arms, feeling the rough wool fabric of the dark blue tunic that Tilma had left me. She had also left me a pair of black trousers (ones that fit me) and a pair of brown leather boots.

"I appreciate that you'd give me these, but I'm okay—."

Taryn crossed her arms. "You need to wear boots while walking around, Skadi. Most of the establishments here won't allow you to enter if you don't have something on your feet."

"Dirt is something," I replied and Taryn rolled her eyes at my remark.

I frowned at the memory. I didn't mind wearing the boots; it just felt weird to me. "Come on! Let's see what Carlotta is selling today!" Taryn grabbed my wrist, leading me to a stand. I sniffed the air (again, out of habit), the scent of vegetables and bread reached my nose. My stomach growled quietly in response.

"I've just about had it with you," I muttered under my breath. Taryn didn't seem to hear me. She was entirely absorbed in looking at the food that was for sale.

Carlotta Valentia was a young Imperial woman, with brown hair and light brown eyes. She looked to be perhaps about four or five years older than me, but the way she carried herself, she seemed older than that.

My eyes wandered from each vendor. I was aware that Taryn had started talking to Carlotta about a Bard at the Bannered Mare Inn that was giving Carlotta some trouble, but my eyes rested on a gold trinket with a red gem in the middle of the trinket.

I felt myself wander away from Taryn. Moments later, I was observing the trinket closely. "Hello there, dear." I looked up and saw another elderly Nord woman wearing a belted tunic. She had a weathered look about her, soft eyes, and an inviting smile. "Are you interested in anything?"

I tapped the trinket and the Nord woman picked it up and handed it to me. "You have good taste, my friend. The metal is gold." Gold? But wasn't that used to buy and sell things? "The gem you see in the middle is a ruby. Very expensive."

I handed the trinket back, smiling at the older woman. "Thank you for letting me look at it…?"

"Fralia Gray-Mane," the woman, Fralia, replied in a warm tone. "May I know your name?"

"Skadi," I replied. "May I know how much that trinket it?" I asked.

Fralia giggled, making my face redden. "It's a necklace, Skadi, you wear it around your throat and it rests against your chest or shirt." Fralia made a point by putting the necklace on and I found myself admiring the necklace.

"There you are!" I jumped at the sound of Taryn's voice. "I look away for five seconds and you wander off!" Taryn smiled as she looked at Fralia. "Fralia," Taryn said as she politely regarded the Nord woman. "Has Skadi been staying out of trouble?"

"Yes, your young friend here has been keeping me company." Fralia removed the necklace and placed it back in the box that it was originally placed in. "She has a very good eye for jewelry."

Taryn looked at the necklace then me. "I'd like that necklace," Taryn stated as she handed Fralia the coin purse that Elana had given Taryn. I still had my coin purse (I was embarrassed that I didn't know how to use the gold in the purse), and the heavy weight of the gold was like a constant echo in my mind.

Without a second thought, Fralia had wrapped the necklace tightly and handed it to Taryn. "Thank-you," Fralia said as Taryn made to hand me the wrapped box; I put my hands up quickly.

"You purchased that, it's yours," I said as I took a step back.

Rolling her eyes, Taryn flipped my hand and placed the small box in my palm. "It's a gift, from me to you. Think of it as a way of me saying, 'Welcome to the Companions'."

"Oh," Fralia exclaimed, her eyes wide when she took the two of us in. "You're a Companion? When did you arrive?"

"Last night, ma'am," I replied promptly.

Fralia smiled again, the wrinkles around her face seemed to have disappeared when she did smile. "Well then, Skadi, I hope you find your stay in Whiterun comfortable." She winked at me. "Perhaps you can keep Taryn over here…" She gestured to Taryn. "Out of trouble?"

I shrugged. "I can try."

Taryn playfully punched my shoulder. "Thanks, Fralia, we'll see you around." At that, Taryn led me away from Fralia and we browsed the other vendors (for some reason Taryn avoided the meat stand). As we continued to browse, I couldn't help but smile.

So far, everything was going okay. Nothing was triggering my wolf and the crowded market didn't bother me as much as I thought it would.