The Heart of Cynder
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For what do I live? All I have done and all I do, is criticized into nothing. My every action is prejudiced by my reputation. Despite my efforts and the support of Spyro and the guardians I was still shunned whenever they weren't around. The accidental pushes, quieting of conversation at my approach, anything to keep me separate. Ever since I was emancipated from Malefor I've known I wanted to repay all the damages I caused. I know that death can't be reversed, but I'll do whatever I can to make up for it.
Nowadays things are getting better. The adults of the generation I terrorized are dying off, and their children don't have much reason to hate me. Sure, they were told all about me when they were young, but they were young. The stories of my torturous slaughtering, my relentless attack upon countless small towns and villages, and my systematic hunt to kill all who were unneeded; all fueled by the power and fear imposed upon me by my master. Things may be looking up outside, but inside everything is still there.
I can vividly remember everyone I have killed. Every whimper, every scream, every futile attempt to escape or fight back. Burned into my mind as an encumbering burden. When shall I break free of these dark chains! They restrain me from achieving what I set out to do. I take a step forward, and one memory can send be back five more.
However...I think I'm on the right track now.
These dragons know what they're doing and as long as their goals are similar to mine; I'll latch on to them. They've been working for a little while now and have already started to make a presence of themselves in Warfang. I don't really see this going anywhere, I mean what can five of us do among a city of thousands? Nothing, all we can do is try our hardest, and then fail to succeed.
Ugh, why must I be so negative? How do I expect to be trusted when I can't trust in myself? How could someone love me when I don't love myself...how can I give love without first loving myself? I would do anything to get out from under this shadow, but who can I turn to for my escape?
Spyro cares so much for me but...he has his own problems to deal with. Ever since we left from under the wings of the guardians he hasn't been able to go anywhere without being swarmed. Unfortunately, while those who hate me are slowly but surely coming to the end of the road, those who love him are only beginning their lives' journeys.
Perhaps working in the background we actually can achieve something. Maybe the fact that I disappear will give time for them to forget, and give me time to get some plans rolling along. As soon as I find how to erase these memories from my mind, everything will run perfectly. There will be no more backtracking, no self-hate, not a trace of doubt in myself. If only I could forget...instead I will live with this pain for eternity.
