Brief Glimpse of the Other Side

Chapter 4

Authors Note-Well, I survived the episode I dreaded. And I liked it too. While I was already getting to his anger over the folks in the biz side of this I did do a few things. Tpel-thanks to you I have now rewatched the first ep a few times (I haven't downloaded so it was great to watch with kanji subtitles!) and fixed the things you mentioned. Masquerade Witch-This is a long chapter, just for you. The short ones were both filler and a mental holiday. Lion Queen-You are the bestest.

Note, I did incorporate Christina Frye in here. My thought is he felt she manipulated him at the end of the ep but he was so worn down he couldn't fight her off. Kate is not Christina. You'll see as this advances. Reviews as always, begged for.

At most conferences of any sort, the festivities tend to start the night before with a cocktail party or some sort of dinner. Knowing this, Agent Lisbon had her agents in the party, acting as attendees, striking up conversations with the guests and getting to know the scene. In undercover work, this was a perfect plan, in Patrick Jane's case; he was simply Kate O'Mara's date for the evening, a plan that caused both amusement and trepidation. His original decision to assist the CBI didn't include this kind of work, but when Lisbon told him the situation, he wanted the chance to make up for the Frye situation.

Kate watched the agents in the room and watched Jane's interaction with the guests at the convention. While she did find Patrick fascinating, he was also an aloof puzzle. From the moment she shook his hand, all of her instincts were screaming that he was a wounded soul in desperate need of help. It bothered her that he kept pushing it away. He was also horribly uncomfortable in this atmosphere. He was a skeptic; she got that instantly from his demeanor when she spoke with Agent Lisbon. He did everything but scoff at her. His disbelief to her was a shield.

The fact that he joined her at the party was surprising. He could have very easily handed the job over to the other two agents that he had introduced her to, but his attitude seemed more like he was going to the guillotine than a party that he was working. Something was deeply wrong with him.

Agent Lisbon had noticed it as well. While she admired the gusto that Jane had thrown into this assignment, she was worried about quiet he had become. From what she knew, it had been five years since he had left this world. The conference director had been a little quiet when she mentioned she was with the CBI and would have agents in the party to protect O'Mara, but was a little more animated when she mentioned the names. Patrick Jane had quite a reputation in these circles. They were not a group willing to forget, but somehow he was forgiven. All the times she had to deal with 'isn't he the psychic?' were magnified in that one conversation. The convention personnel had to deal with 'isn't he the liar'?

Patrick Jane knew that feeling the moment he entered the party with Kate. While the green dress set off her eyes beautifully and the excitement people had over meeting her were electric, some faces that he recognized were not so happy to see him. He didn't need any form of gift to notice it, but he was working and he felt the usual humor that he used to counter people kicking in. There was apathy toward him though. It was okay. He didn't believe any of the folks in the room, but since he was in a working capacity and not on his own, he was quiet and observant. He didn't need another Christina Frye to come along and cold read him. He wouldn't let himself get that vulnerable again.

He watched Kate meeting fans and fellow psychics, her charm filling the room with a small bit of joy. She moved from person to person, a genuine smile on her face, the exhaustion that had plagued her earlier nowhere to be seen. He sank into the background, close enough to listen to the conversations, but far enough to give the conversations an air of privacy.

Lisbon had told him when she asked about the assignment that while it was something that the CBI wasn't charged to do, this was a favor to the Attorney General. The mere thought that a psychic would get killed while in their fair state was something that they wanted to prevent, rather than investigate. Jane hadn't balked at the idea, but rather found the idea challenging.

Agent Lisbon had entered the room a few minutes earlier, much changed from her CBI wear into a more appropriate dress for the party. Cho and Rigsby were in the room as well, merged in as attendees, and actually doing a good job at not being that well noticed. Jane knew that people were now paying attention to O'Mara and not him so that at least he had a few minutes to breathe.

He couldn't help but notice when Van Pelt entered the room, trying her best to fit in with the other attendees. Since she believed in the power these people claimed to possess, she fit in more than she knew, but she did dress the part and it warmed Jane to notice that Grigsby was thrilled to see her. He knew that they were an item, but Grigsby had kept it so under cover that it was impossible to those who didn't watch closely.

He had liked the life when he was starting out. The people who backed him, believed in him were great, but over time it was harder and harder to keep them involved. He was a near expert in what to tell them, because the game here was to tell them what they wanted to hear. Sometimes that worked for him, sometimes it didn't. Since giving it up, it was easier to read people. The room was happy to see her. Those who recognized him didn't care.

"You want a drink while you wait?" Lisbon asked, coming up to join him.

"No, thank you," he said, turning toward her, "Nice dress."

"Thank you," she replied, "You okay? I know this a lot for you."

"There is so much history in this room, Agent Lisbon, you wouldn't even begin to fathom it," Jane replied, "I understand why you wanted me involved. Our guy is not here."

"How can both of you be so certain of it?" Lisbon asked, "I know you don't believe, but this is a room full of believers."

"Or well paid liars. They believe what they want to believe," Jane replied, "I've changed my mind, you want a drink?"

"Soft drink, I'm working," Lisbon's responded with a smile, "You really don't want to talk about this do you?"

Jane sighed an audible, "No."

As he turned from her, he looked back at Kate who was deep in conversation. The people around her he recognized so he went to the bar got a soft drink for Lisbon and a beer for himself. Returning to Lisbon, he handed her the drink.

"I hope that a beer is okay tonight," he said, drinking the beer, "I know we must try to look like we fit in."

"You look like a fish out of water," Lisbon said, "You have got to relax."

Jane smiled.

"I'm relaxed," he started, "As for the fish out of water, I said publically that most of these people were charlatans and liars, so, I don't know what to expect. They do love her though. I didn't know that this was her second time in the states."

"I didn't know," Lisbon, replied, "I'm sorry I put you into this mess. I do believe it's the first time I've seen you this uncomfortable."

"It's no mess, I had to face it eventually," Jane continued, "You just didn't know. I said yes. Consider it my redemption for earlier cases, Agent Lisbon."

Kate looked over to Jane and smiled. He lifted the beer in salute and she gently motioned to him. He walked over to her.

"Can you grab me one of those?" she asked, "I can't seem to get away from all of these people."

"Certainly," Jane replied, "any preference?"

"Guinness, please," she said softly, "I trust you getting it. The others here bother me."

"Really?" Jane inquired, his tone edging on mocking, "You have a feeling?"

Kate glared at him.

"Quit being skeptical," she said, "It makes you ugly. You know full well some of us do have gifts."

"Uh huh," Jane replied, shaking his head, "It's the payment for those gifts that bothers me the most. I'll tell you about gifts when I get back with your beer."

Jane turned and walked back to the bar, passing Lisbon quickly. Lisbon didn't follow, she recognized the look. He wasn't angry, but he was going to set Kate straight. When he walked past her again, he was calm, more reserved and from what Teresa could tell, a little angry. Kate's crowd had died down and she looked up to him as he approached.

"Thank you," she said, taking the dark bottle of Irish beer from him, "You are very kind to do this for me."

"Doing this is not a problem, being 'here' is a problem," Jane began, "There's a history in this room that I can't even begin to bring up."

"You want me to tell it to you?" Kate offered, sipping the beer and looking him in the eyes, "I've heard tell that I'm pretty good at that."

"Yeah, right," Jane smiled slightly, "You don't want to tell me my life story, Ms. O'Mara, too many chapters and too weird for a miniseries."

Kate laughed.

"I know all about weird lives, Mr. Jane," she said, "You want to tell me about yours?"

"I'm surprised this room hasn't told you," he surmised, looking around, "They didn't tell you about me, did they?"

"What do you mean? I know that you're Patrick Jane of the CBI, " Kate inquired, "Do we need to continue this someplace a little more private?"

"Yes, I think we do," Jane said, talking her elbow and heading for the balcony, "I don't need to have this all over the room."

Kate nodded and they walked outside to a beautiful night. The moon hung over the Pacific, with a light breeze blowing and the sound of the waves was gentle.

"How am I supposed to know of you Mr. Jane?" Kate continued, "I know you're not comfortable here, you have done wonders in trying to hide it, but what is causing it?"

"You've never heard of Patrick Jane?" Patrick Jane asked, "In this community of all communities, that name doesn't ring a bell? My life story didn't 'cross the pond' as the English are so fond of saying?"

Kate sipped on her beer. Patrick Jane was one thing to her, arrogant.

"No," she replied, "I'm sorry, it doesn't."

"Five years ago I called most of the people in that room liars because of what they did," Jane began, "I was one of you. I had a career in this."

Kate took a moment to let what he said sink in.

"You were one of us," Kate said, "So, why did you leave? The police offered you a better job?"

"They were my only job," Jane replied, "Which makes this assignment difficult. I'm crossing two worlds here, Kate. Sorry if my skepticism doesn't appeal to you."

"Skepticism is good in our line of work," Kate interrupted, "It keeps us honest."

"For me, skepticism is the only honesty," Jane admitted, "There is no possible way for you to do what you do. You can look at a person, see the grief of them losing a loved one and know instantly that's why. You can look at what they are wearing, carrying or even mentioning and know who they were and use it to your advantage. How much do you charge for readings?"

"$300's my going rate," Kate responded, "I'll read you for free."

"No need, I don't want to be read," Jane continued, "I already know what I need to know, but thank you. Let me tell you about yourself, shall I?"

"Oh, this should be good," Kate said, "Go."

"You come from a distant land, you haven't slept well in years," Jane began, "This gift rules your life, you hate it and wish you had done something else, like fashion design."

His tone had turned mocking.

"You see, I can cold read better than most," he stopped and finished off his beer, "Thank you for offering to read me though."

"You're welcome," she finished her beer, "I wish I could help you."

"You are," Patrick admitted.

"How?" she started, "All you have done is be skeptical toward me, downright mean in most cases and arrogant."

"You're listening," Jane replied softly, turning away from her to look out at the moon, "I'm here to protect you from the folks inside and you've listened to me. I know that you're scared, you would have blown me off at the airport if you weren't."

Kate nodded. He was right by that. She was scared that this kook who threatened to kill her like the devil she was might just do it. It was good that he understood the group inside, but his anger had to be dealt with.

"You also don't know how to work with all the attention inside," Jane continued, "It's overwhelming that suddenly all these people know your name and want to know what you do. They want you to read them for free, something I never did, and they want to walk away from you happy," Jane continued, "You in turn find yourself telling them exactly what they want to hear. It's not a gift, Kate, it's an ability to see the world in an entirely different light."

"That's how you see it," Kate interrupted, "You've assumed a lot with me, Mr. Jane."

"For god's sake, call me Patrick," he said softly, looking back at her, "I think you've earned that right."

"It's not about what's right, Patrick," Kate continued, "You don't see the gifts the way I do. You turned away from your talent, right?"

"Lying isn't a talent," Patrick injected.

"No, you were helping people, by your own admission," she joined him in looking at the moon, "You haven't said why you left this life."

Jane took a moment. It was always hard to mention why without his mind playing the cruel flashback of walking into his house and finding the gift that Red John had left him. It hurt every single time and it was still hard for him to talk about it.

"I was doing consultant work for the CBI, trying to find a serial killer named Red John," he began, steadying his voice, "I was a little more arrogant and confident than I am now"

He smiled as she did, she got the joke.

"I was getting pretty close, to the point where the media was interviewing me regularly to see if I had found him or had any ideas. I had done a show in town and came home," he continued, "My wife didn't answer when I called out to her, like she usually did. She hadn't picked up the phone so I was worried. I walked down the hallway to our room and found a message from Red John."

Kate gasped. She started to put a hand on his and realized that he was gripping the railing for dear life. Instead she put a hand on his shoulder.

"You don't have to tell me the rest," she said, "Patrick, I'm so sorry."

Jane took a deep breath. He found some control and let himself settle back into the reality of where he was.

"Thank you," he said, turning back to her, "That's why I left this life. I saw what helping people brought me. It's easier for me to work with the police when the subjects are already dead."

"Explains a lot," she said, "Thank you."

"For what?" he asked.

"Sharing that with me," she said, her eyes meeting his, "and keeping me from being scared here."

"You're welcome," he replied, putting his elbow out to escort her back inside, "We better get you inside. They're bound to be missing you."

"Probably," Kate sighed, "You going to be alright in there?"

"If I can still be skeptical, sure," Jane started for the doors, "If not, it might get ugly."

Kate smacked him on the arm. He laughed, the first genuine laugh she heard from him.