"Elsa…" he said once again.
"This is all my fault…" Elsa finally said with a cracking voice. The sudden realization hit her like a sword in her stomach. Tears kept gushing down her pale cheeks. Her vision blurred by her forming tears only focused on the carpeted floor with broken glass. She couldn't see. Her eyes were too watery. She was thankful to cry for it distorted the reality she didn't want to face. This was too overwhelming and sudden and so huge in mass for one person to be burdened of. She wanted to just kill herself so that she wouldn't need to accept this cruel reality. Maybe that was the fastest way.
Yes.
Maybe her existence in Arendelle has always been and very truly meaningless after all. She's a woman with an innate curse. She's a Queen whom has caused so much despair because of that curse. She's a sister that did nothing but to hurt her sister.
"This is… all… my fault," she whispered again, covering her face with quivering ice-cold hands. She sobbed with her fingers now wet with her tears. She turned around, facing the ghastly massacred window, blinded by the moonlight. She wiped off her tears but it still kept on flowing. Raged by how feeble and powerless she was in this situation, she pressed the tips of her palms onto her eyelids, having the gesture just beg for them to stop crying. She was such a weakling. She was so helpless. She couldn't lead. She was a disgrace to her family and to all of Arendelle.
Frost was visibly forming on every corner it could find- on the bed sheets, on the corniced ceilings, on the carpet, the floor, the desk, the sharp cracked edges of the window, her sandals, her gown… her bare legs… her trembling shoulders…
Icicles protruded from the floor and walls, stagnant when it formed its menacing points. Then, gradually, as if to give time to decide, each and one of them ascended, inch by inch, and outstretched its solid self, slowly attracted to piercing something so soft and fragile, having a longing unstoppable desire to impale someone so... tempted for this end. It acted on its own accord. No, it was acting with permission. It was reacting.
Yes.
It would be faster to end the pain this way, right? By leaving this world, she didn't need to face any of this agony she didn't deserve to endure. Just one simple stab to end her infinite misery.
Elsa gasped when she heard loud cracks right beside her left ear. She looked around to find large hands breaking icicles mere inches from her neck. She felt something else dribble down her calves and slowly it bit her. Something sharp and something so… familiar. She felt it, blood oozing down the cold skin of her weak legs. "Stop it," Kristoff said gently, placing a hand on Elsa's shoulder. "We can't save Anna without you…" His voice cracked, holding back sobs. "So, please. Stop it,"
The ice around her calves soon melted, mercilessly rubbing its cold surface against her bare open wounds. As the icicles vanished into glitter, she found parts of her body suddenly aching and bleeding- her legs, her arms and she felt her feet weakly trampling over the shards of ice and glass.
She gripped the frames of the window, losing strength she thought she had entire control on. She felt it again. Red-hot liquid, slowly but steadily, seeping out of her stomach. Sometimes, it felt as though it just seeped out while caressing everything along the way. Sometimes, it exited in squirts like how juicy fruits would when we pinch them. It wasn't much, Elsa guessed. But she could still clearly feel it. She figured she wasn't really shocked by the abrupt pain. She was more intrigued on the warmth of her blood. Not once did she ever think that there was a single hint of warmth anywhere near her. It was… comforting…
"Snap out of it," Kristoff said, firmly this time. "I know you're sad. You're not the only one," He placed a hand on Elsa's back. "And we'll get her together. This isn't your fault. This isn't something you have to face alone. You have friends-" He paused. "You have companions you can depend on now, remember?" Elsa's cries stopped. And she nodded.
"Yeah, you're right…" she mumbled, letting the words solitarily sink into Kristoff. She turned to Kristoff to give a weak smile. What was she thinking? She looked down to her legs and shook her head as the blood continued to trickle down, pulled by the invincible gravity. It cannily dripped to the carpet by its own silent volition where the red spread itself outwards, staining the once clear coloured carpet. She heard herself chuckle inside by the actual thought of killing herself- the fact that her own powers assisted her in committing suicide. 'That wasn't the first time now, was it, Elsa?'
"Everyone in Arendelle loves you, Elsa," Kristoff said with all his tenderness. "You may not see it," He stepped nearer towards the window and extended his large arms, his rough fingers fiddling with the stained cloth, still wavering on the sharp broken glass as the icy wind came in uninvited. "But everyone does love you… in fear that you won't have enough of it," Kristoff's encouraging words lit the dull flame in Elsa's heart as the cold breeze refreshed Elsa. Uninvited it was, but it was regarded as a regular customer- always there to come and drop by whenever Elsa felt this way, felt this negative. And there it was, that shield that no one but Elsa can feel encasing her with its protective adhesive. Once again, she had regained her power, her authority with this armor now giving its word to defend her at all cost.
No one could see it or feel it but Elsa. And she liked it. It was hers.
Finally, with a swift whip of his wrists, the fluttering cloth detached from its odd hook and lay tight within Kristoff's grasp, seemingly quivering as its enemies held it hostage. Nowhere to run or hide but with its plain existence, now can the story begin.