Chapter IV

Axel sat on his couch, contemplating what Demyx had said to him at work today. It didn't make sense to him. Roxas could have a crush on him? He could have a crush on Roxas? He just met the kid yesterday. How could something like that happen so fast? And how could anyone, let alone someone like Roxas, love him?

His past wasn't a great one. Always being beaten and verbally abused by his father, having run ins with the cops, beating up people...who could love such a...horrible person? Just the other day he beat someone up for crying out loud!

The red head gritted his teeth at the thoughts that came into his mind.

"You're worthless. You'll never become anything. You'll just be a useless ass to the world." The words of his father echoed into his mind.

"No one could possibly love an ass like yourself. You'll just be alone, forever."

Axel shook his head, his eyes closed tightly. He remembered how his father beat him when things weren't going well at work. He would be thrown against the wall, thrown against the floor. Slapped, kicked, punched, scratched, hair pulled, and anything else his father could come up with to take his anger out on his son.

He remembered the cops hand cuffing him at two in the morning when he had stolen a bottle of alcohol and beat up the person that tried to stop him. He ended up putting that guy in the hospital that morning.

He remembered beating up various teenagers that upset him too much. Big ones, small ones, older ones, younger ones. What a monster.

The red head sighed and shook his head once more.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x

Roxas pushed the apartment door open and walked inside. No lights were on, so he assumed that Axel was not home yet. He shut the door behind him and made his way into the living room.

The blonde heard a quiet sound. He raised an eyebrow, wondering what it could be. He listened again and turned in the direction it was coming from. It sounded like it was coming from the couch. He headed towards it and realized that there was an outline of someone sitting on it. He reached a hand out to see who it was.

"Axel?" Roxas said softly.

The red head lifted his head up and looked at the younger boy. By the light of the setting sun that was coming through the blinds hanging from Axel's sliding glass door, Roxas saw that Axel was crying.

Roxas sat down beside Axel and turned to face him. "What's wrong Axel...?"

Axel shook his head, wiping his eyes. He felt embarrassed that Roxas had seen him like this. He turned his head away and looked down, doing his best to keep any more tears from falling.

"You can tell me..." Roxas said gently. His hand unconsciously moved to Axel's again. This time, when both were aware of where their hands were, neither moved them.

"Roxas..." Axel began. "How...could anyone possibly like a horrible person like me? I've been beat, called horrible names, told horrible names, beat up others, had run ins with the cops, been arrested..."

"So? What you did might not have been the smartest thing you've done, in the terms of you beating up others and having run ins with the cops, but if you go deeper than that, you can see that it's reflected on what your father had done," Roxas said, stroking Axel's hand with his thumb, trying his best to comfort him.

"Roxas...I've been thrown around like a useless pillow. I've thrown others around like they were useless pillows. I've stolen alcohol, just to drink. Just to be numb, even if it was just for a little while. I was becoming my father. How could anyone love someone like that?" Axel said to him quietly and slowly. He couldn't stop the tears from falling.

"Well I like you. So does Demyx. I don't think you're a horrible person at all. Sure you've had issues in the past, but you're showing signs of change, ever since you took me in off the streets and gave me a roof and a bed, along with food," Roxas replied.

"I don't think that makes up for all the bad and wrong I've done..." Axel sighed, shuddering slightly from crying.

"Oh Axel...you shouldn't be so hard on yourself. It's okay. Plus it's over and done with now," the blonde said as he scooted somewhat closer to Axel. He had no idea what he was doing. By the time he had done the things he had already started, like taking Axel's hand, stroking it, moving closer to him, it was too late to stop himself. He was also afraid he was going to scare Axel off. His heart was pounding, he felt as though his heart was going to burst out of his chest at any moment.

"Roxas, it's just not that simple..." Axel said as he shook his head.

"I know it's not that simple, I understand. I think though, you should try. I know you can do it. I can help you out, and I'm sure Demyx will help too," the younger boy said, trying to look Axel in the eyes.

Axel sighed. Roxas slowly raised his hand and placed it under Axel's chin. He lifted his head so he could look him in the eyes. He saw that he was still crying and that seemed to break his heart. He took both hands and wiped away the red head's tears gently with his thumbs.

He held Axel's face in his hands and stared into his eyes, studying them. He saw anger, hate, fear, along with mainly sadness in his eyes. Roxas shook his head. "You're not a horrible person Axel. You've just had a rough past..."

The younger boy was moving in slowly, his eyes closing during the process. He definitely didn't know what he was doing now. He hoped he wasn't about to scare Axel away permanently, or get himself kicked out of his apartment. He couldn't stop now. He had to keep going.

He pressed his lips gently into the older boy's lips. A tingling sensation ran throughout his body, along with a warm sensation. The red head's lips were soft and warm. He saw what he had heard about behind his eyes; fireworks. What was the most amazing to him though, was the fact that Axel hadn't pulled away. He was kissing him back, attempting to deepen the kiss. He could feel Axel's tongue brush against his bottom lip, asking for entrance. Without too much thought, Roxas allowed him in.

After a passionate moment between the two, the two pulled away slowly and looked into each other's eyes. They were both blushing but smiling. They leaned in and kissed once more, only this time it was shorter than the last and it ended with a hug.

"I hope I was able to make you feel better," Roxas whispered during the hug.

"You did. Thank you...Roxy..." Axel whispered back. Axel liked the name 'Roxy' as a nickname for Roxas. He hoped he didn't mind being called that. Of course, Roxas didn't. Axel was one of the few exceptions he let get away with call him 'Roxy'.

The blonde smiled at what the red head had said. The two pulled away and Axel kissed Roxas's nose. "So um...

do you think we should try this out? The relationship thing I mean..." Axel asked slowly.

Roxas smiled and nodded. "I think we should. It sounds like a good idea."

Axel smiled back at him and hugged Roxas again.

"What a crazy couple of days. One minute, we're total strangers, the next, we're in a relationship," Roxas said with a slight chuckle.

Axel chuckled too. "It has been indeed a crazy couple of days. Who would've thought that this was going to happen?"

The blonde shook his head. "Not me. It seems like things are finally looking up though."

Axel pulled his head off of Roxas's shoulder, still embracing him, and smiled at Roxas before kissing him again.