The next time he came, it was so late at night that she could only tell the door was open by the sound of its squeaking hinges. Sasha tensed, unable to get up. In a second, she felt a weight on the side of the mattress and he placed his hand gently on her leg

"Sasha? Are you awake?" Bertholdt asked in a whisper. She bit her lip and said nothing, trying to shift away from him. "Are you alright?"

What the hell kind of question is that? She wanted to scream, but she held her tongue. She didn't want to talk to him. If he liked her, he would let her go. It was simple. Yet, she was still tied down.

He touched her face, and she felt butterflies in her stomach. He was so gentle, so much the opposite of what he should be. He was the colossal titan. He had kicked a hole in Wall Maria. He had killed hundreds of thousands of people. Millions. What he had done was still killing people. She wished her heartbeat wasn't so loud. She was sure he could hear it.

"Come on, Sash, please. Don't ignore me."

"Untie me," she said quietly.

Bertholdt was silent for a moment, then she felt the mattress dip towards him as he laid down next to her, his big hand resting on her stomach. Right where the butterflies were. She would have laughed at it just a few days ago. Now it stuck in her throat.

"I'm so sorry, Sasha."

"I don't care," she said. "I just want to go home."

Bertholdt brushed her hair aside and rested his chin on her shoulder. "I know," he said, "And I am so sorry. I didn't want you to have to go through this."

Sasha bit her lip, suddenly feeling her heart seize up. "I don't get why you can't just let me go."

He sat up and looked into her face in the dark. "Are you crying?"

"Shut up. No."

"Sasha…" he said sadly, cupping her cheek in his hand and brushing away the tears running silently down her face. "Please don't cry. I'm trying to help you; I'm doing everything I can, please, just don't…"

"I said I wasn't crying, you big stupid shit," she snapped, but her voice cracked despite what she said. He took her face in both hands and pressed his forehead against hers, his hot skin making her feel like she had a fever. Their noses touched. Knowing he was about to kiss her, she jerked back.

"What's wrong?" Bertholdt asked, pushing himself back up. He was on all fours over her body, trapping her even without the ropes. His legs rubbed against hers. His breath was hot on her cheeks. She felt a warm flush running over her body, making her shiver with arousal. The heat swirled between her legs. Damn! She thought as her body worked against her. The idea of having him on top of her with her hands tied should have made her sick, but instead…I'm not… I'm not turned on… I'm not…I'm not… Still, she could feel herself blushing bright red in the dark.

For a moment, the two just stared, each waiting for the other to make a move.

"It's alright that you like me, okay?" Sasha whispered, her voice shaky. "It's alright. But if you use these ropes to treat me like a fucking ragdoll I'm going to—"

"I would never." Bertholdt's weight shifted and in a second the ropes around her wrists loosened. "You know what?" His face was an inch from hers. "Do whatever you want."

I want to leave, she told herself. But she couldn't deny what she was feeling. Though she wished that she could see him as a monster, he was human. She knew him. And, despite common sense, she wanted him.

Bertholdt waited a moment, watching to see what she would do. When Sasha didn't move, he leaned in, and she tilted her head to catch his warm lips with her own. She shook the ropes free of her hands and buried her fingers in his thick black hair.

Bertholdt smiled against her mouth and then kissed her fiercely, sucking on her bottom lip, licking it ever so slightly. She opened her mouth in a gasp and he forced his tongue inside, deepening the kiss and making her moan as she felt her body growing hotter, her blood rushing faster. One of his hands drifted down her body, resting heavily on her hip, so close. Slowly, he pulled back, his eyes bright in the dark. "Was that your first real kiss, Sasha?"

Her stomach sank. "It was bad?"

"No," he chuckled, kissing her neck and making her breath hitch. "You're perfect."He bit her collarbone and she dug her fingers into his scalp, needing more. Her body was on fire, her belly tingling. "I had no idea," he murmured into her skin, "That anyone could be this perfect."

"Hah…" Sasha panted. "Sh-shut up." She pulled his face back up and kissed him again, arching her back and pressing her body against his, feeling his toned, hard chest rub against hers. "ah—"

He took her shirt in his hands nearly tore it open, a few buttons ripping off and skipping across the floor. Sasha moaned. His hands dragged up the skin of her stomach pushed her bra away, caressing and kneading her breasts, his thumbs rubbing over her nipples. "Fuck, Sasha," he groaned. "You're so…" He licked one of them, making her gasp. "So beautiful."

She wrapped her arms around his head, burying her face in his hair to keep herself from moaning out. Unconsciously, her thighs squeezed together, rubbing against each other, needing. She hissed as he bit her playfully, his breath making her wild.

What am I doing?

He drew his knee up between her legs and she bucked against it, hardly aware of what she was doing. Trailing her fingers down his hard torso, she pulled his shirt up over his head and pressed herself against his naked chest, his skin so hot it almost burned her. She gasped, choking on her breath as she ground her entire body into him, pressing her hips against his and tracing his collarbone with a kiss. Bertholdt looked down at her flushed face, brushing his lips against her cheek before he reached down and undid the button of her pants.

"Wh-what are you doing?" she gasped, staring at him.

His green eyes were bright in the darkness, nearly glowing as he gazed back at her. He said nothing, instead kissing her hard, his tongue distracting her as he pushed his hand past the band of her trousers. He smiled almost to himself as he felt her skin shiver and jump at his touch.

"Fuck," Sasha hissed, feeling his fingers rubbing her clit through her underwear. She closed her eyes, but she could still feel him watching her. "F-fuh…"

"You're so wet," he gasped, kissing her again as he pulled her pants down, leaving nothing but her panties between his hand and her pussy. Sasha swore and thrust her hips against his palm, needing more. He rubbed her faster, making her legs shiver. "Bertholdt…"

"You like this, Sasha?" He hissed, his voice husky. Now she could feel his erection rubbing against her through his pants, already so hard on her leg. She'd never even seen a boy's privates before…she had no business needing his so badly.

He kissed her fiercely and tore off her panties, trailing one finger down her opening before forcing it inside her.

"Aah!"

"Fuck, Sasha," he said, "you're too tight…for two fingers."

She pressed her mouth against his shoulder and moaned loudly into his skin. "I'm…sorry."

He laughed quietly. "It's the opposite of a problem."

She panted, feeling her body growing even more aroused, and he tried to push another of his fingers in. Sasha gasped, suddenly feeling like there was something within her ripping. "Stop!" she cried, digging her fingers into his back in pain. "Bertholdt, stop!"

"I'm sorry, Sash," he said, kissing her forehead. "I have to do this now so it'll be easier on you later."

Later? Does he mean…

She shut her eyes tightly and bit her lip, feeling a tear squeezing out of the corner of her eye. "Bertholdt! Crap, that…really…ow."

After a moment, though, her pain subsided, and she relaxed. Bertholdt smiled, kissing her neck as she moaned in pleasure again, his thumb stroking her clitoris as he thrust his fingers into her, stroking her sensitive spot and making her shiver. "Ah…hah…ha…"

Suddenly, Bertholdt pulled back, his weight disappearing from the bed. Sasha could hear the sound of his muffled swearing as he fumbled with the button of his trousers in the dark, finally unzipping them and throwing them away behind him. In a flash he was back on top of her, his lips pressing hard against her mouth, almost desperate. "I need you, Sasha," he groaned, pressing his hardness against her mons as he leaned over her. She ran her hands over the muscles of his back, feeling them strain against his smooth skin as he held himself above her, and kissed him back.

She felt him pressing against her entrance, and suddenly fully realized what she was doing. What was wrong with her? He was the colossal—"AH!" Sasha screamed as he thrust his entire length into her at once.

"S-Sasha," He panted, his dick pushing so far into her that it almost hurt. She hadn't even known that part of her body existed. Sasha curled her fists around the sheets of the bed and turned her head into the pillow, biting it to keep herself from yelling. "Fuck, Sasha, you're so…fucking…"

He put everything he had into one thrust and she gave a muffled scream of pleasure. He kissed her neck, biting her slightly. She moaned. Bertholdt smiled against her skin."'So good," he grunted. Slowly, he dragged his hand over her breasts and down her belly, his touch so light that she shivered around it. He began to rub her clit again, making her groan and pant into the fabric.

"Stop doing that, Sasha," he whispered into her ear. "I want to hear you."

Sasha reluctantly let the pillow fall back to the mattress, realizing that he seemed to have stopped moving. She looked up at his face cautiously, seeing his eyes shining green in the dark. "What?" she asked apprehensively.

"Oh nothing," he teased.

Then in one movement, Bertholdt thrust himself all the way inside her, deeper than Sasha even knew he could go. She screamed out in pleasure and dug her fingers into his back, nearly crying. It was too much. She couldn't handle it any more.

A wave of pleasure like Sasha had never even imagined crashed over her, making her jaw drop and her breath hitch. "Ah," she heard him moan as her walls clamped down on his member. "Shh…shit, Sasha, I'm gonna…"

She felt a sudden warmth spreading inside her, though she was too far out of her mind in the aftermath of her orgasm to think much of it at all. Panting, Bertholdt crashed down on the bed beside her. Laying one big hand over her smooth waist, he pulled her into his tall body.

"You might not have gotten here the best way," he murmured, touching the tip of her ear with his nose, "but I'm so glad you are." He kissed her neck, his unsteady breath making her shiver. Sasha listened to the rhythm of his breathing, feeling it rush over her skin, and let the rise and fall of his chest lull her to sleep.

But even as her mind clouded over with dreams, she couldn't shake the feeling that something was horribly wrong with her.