Chapter 4
I looked at her, confused. Who was this girl? Why was she crying? She looked at me as if I had done something wrong.
"I'm sorry," I asked, "but do I know you?" She stared at me in horror, and then realization.
"No," She said slowly and carefully, "You don't know me, yet, but I know you." I didn't know her yet? What did that mean- oh. I finally figured out what she meant.
"Who are you?" I asked, jumping up.
She smiled, but it didn't meet her eyes. "I'm Renesmee." Renesmee? Could this be the famous, mysterious Renesmee? She didn't seem so special to me. She looked regular, like a normal, human gi- and then I finally looked her (I mean really looked at her). I saw that there was defiantly nothing regular about this girl. She was- how could I say this in any other words- pretty. Really really pretty. Familiar, somewhat. She had long, beautiful Bronze hair and pale skin, yet her face was stained with tears I desperately wanted to wipe away. Then I saw why she was so familiar. It was her brown eyes, ones that I dearly loved, that I had recognized. And yet… they were different, somehow. Her eyes seemed to sparkle in the sun, letting the scattered remnants of gold burst out from her eyes.
She was different, and yet the same. She reminded me of…but not Bella, exactly, she still was a different person.
Someone I could love. I quickly brushed away that thought. I loved Bella, not some stranger girl I just met! But I also felt another random, uncontrollable thought enter my mind;
She's already been claimed… I didn't know what caused this thought, but it just came on, like a warning. Renesmee noticed I didn't respond, so she added, "I came into the clearing right when shortly after you left."
I nodded, still thinking. "Who are you, exactly?" I finally asked. Why was she so important? She laughed without humor.
"I've been wondering that myself." There was a long silence. I watched her intently. Then she finally sighed and said, 'I'm Bella's daughter." This truth hit me like a ton of bricks.
"What?" I asked dumbly. She sighed again. "My mom and dad- Edward and Bella- conceived me on their honeymoon. A couple of months later I was born." She stated this without emotion, and I sensed there was more to the story. But at the time, I really didn't care.
Bella and Edward had a child? A daughter. Bella had a daughter with Edward. They had a child. The words echoed back and forth in my head, so much that it made me dizzy.
"But that's-""impossible?" She finished. "Yeah, I've heard that before." I stared at her like she was insane. This couldn't be, Bella belonged to me! For some reason, though, I didn't care. I was too curious.
"Why are you crying? What happened while I was gone?"
"I-"her voice broke, "saw something." Saw something? What did she see that made her run away and cry?
"What did you see?" I couldn't help but wonder. I held on to every word she said, hoping she would keep talking. I liked it when she spoke. I couldn't explain the feeling, as if I wanted her to get whatever was bothering her off her chest. I wanted her to trust me. This was getting weirder and weirder by the minute…
Then Renesmee began. "When I was born, I had a special ability. I was able to tell people what I was thinking just by touching them; not saying anything at all. I was like I put my thoughts into theirs so they could her them.
"When I was older, I was able to do that without touching anyone, sending my thoughts into theirs telepathically. One day, Alice- you know her, right?" I nodded, ad she continued, "Alice wanted to go shopping, and being me, I hated shopping. So I tried something. I tried making my thoughts hers, trying to get her to change her mind.
"Instead, something…weird happened. I can't explain it. I felt a weird connection between me and her, and it was as if both our thoughts were in synch. I felt knowledge from her flow into me and my knowledge into her. Not only that, but I felt our powers connect too." She sighed.
"Since then, I've been able to see the past, like the opposite of what Alice can do. Alice didn't' get any of my power though. Carlisle believes that it was because we had severed the connection before she could inherit any of my ability. Since then, I've only but been that connected with someone else, recreating that day." She eyes me. "That person, Jake, was you. Since then, it's been as if you…know me better, better than anyone else. It's only deepened the connection between us. You see, Jacob, the day I was born you imprinted on me." She stopped, awaiting my reaction.
I processed the information. I had imprinted. I had imprinted on Bella's daughter. Everything clicked. That was why I felt so connected to Bella. It was because of Renesmee. I finally understood what Bella meant by 'if this never happens, you'll never imprint'. I understood. Then Renesmee went on with her answer.
"Tonight, I saw a memory I wasn't supposed to see. I saw…" The she took my hand. At first I didn't understand what was going on, but then she showed me. The memories made me want to pull back my hand in horror. She was showing me of Bella while she was pregnant. She was showing me of Edward's hatred toward her- my hatred toward her. She let me see her thoughts, her own hate of herself for what she did. She loved Bella just as much as I did, and it pained her too of seeing and knowing that she had done this to her.
Then I saw her doubt. The doubt of whether I loved her, the doubt of whether I loved her for who she was or because I imprinted on her. It was funny how I myself had been wondering that myself just moments before I had met Renesmee. When she was done, we both waited for one another to say something.
"I…don't know how to answer your question, Renesmee. The imprint one, I mean."
"Right, I know, stupid question. I hardly know you." She said, obviously disappointed at my answer.
"But," I continued, "I do know that I will love you, and that even now, you are the type of girl I would fall in love with." She hadn't expected that.
"What do you mean?!" She burst out, coming to her feet. I did the same.
"What-?" "You're supposed to be mad at me! You're supposed to hate me! Bella- the one you really love- had a child with your enemy! And you are saying you hate me? I don't belong to exist!" The tears began pouring again, and I could do nothing but watch. "You should hate me! The only reason- the only reason you are saying this is to protect me! You know that you'll love me in the future, and so you're only sating that so you won't screw it all up." She grabbed my face with her hands now. "Tell me the truth, now, what do you really think of me? If you didn't feel anything for me, what would you think?" I stared at her, not sure exactly what to say. I figured I would just tell the truth.
"I think you shouldn't have existed. I think that Edward shouldn't have risked Bella's life like that. I would have torn you apart if you killed Bella." The world seemed to stop. Then she let go of my face and backed away.
"Thank you for telling me the truth." She whispered quietly, and then she was gone.
* * * *
So it was true. Jacob would have torn me apart, would have loved my mother with all intent, if it hadn't been for this imprint. I ran. I needed to get away. I could never come home. I could never face Jacob ever again. I could never face my own parents again. I wish I could tear myself apart. I felt torn apart. By the truth and my heart. I felt someone chase me down, and I ran faster. I knew it was Jacob, but I wouldn't stop. He would only chase me down to make me feel better, but I didn't want to feel better. I wanted to wallow and this despair. I wanted to let it all seep in before the all chased me down and tried to convince me of the lie.
He was getting closer, and I sped up. All those years of training to one day beat my dad at a race paid up. Then he did something I didn't expect. He sprung on me, pushing me down. We both pounded down to the ground. He was on top of me. I tried to push him of.
"Get off! Go away!" I screamed, hitting him in the head and trying to get him off. He tightly secured my hands.
"Wait, you didn't let me explain the rest!" Then I rolled over and hopped up, ready to run, but he grabbed my arm.
"Let go of me!" I fought.
"Listen!" he pulled me closer. Once he caught his breath, he finally said, "Look, I said that you shouldn't exist, but the thing is you do. Vampires shouldn't exist, Werewolves shouldn't exist, but we do. You're no different. And besides, the fact that I even imprinted on you says that you were meant to be. Edward shouldn't have risked Bella's life, but truly it was meant to be. We were meant to be together.
"And last, I would have torn you apart, but when I did that, I'm pretty sure I was just being irrational. After, I probably thought that you had killed my love. But I'm sure that if I had thought it through, I would have realized it wasn't your fault. It wasn't anybody's fault. And the thing is, Renesmee, that is all the past. I think that you should let it go and live in the present. And in the present, I know that your Jacob loves you. Imprinting just leads us to our true love, but then nature takes its course after that. Jacob loves you."
Jacob loves me. And I knew it was true. All of it was true. I was meant to be. I was my parent's, my family's, and Jacob's destiny. I smiled.
"I think," I finally said, "That it's time to go home."
* * * *
I couldn't believe the things I had just said. They just came out. The strange thing was that these words hit me harder than they did Nessie. Did I really mean them? I didn't understand the own things that came out of my mouth! I needed to think some things through…
* * * *
I watched and waited. Everyone was already inside, talking about- but what were they talking about anyway? I didn't care. I so desperately wanted to run into the forest to find Nessie. After she had ran away, after seeing those horrible images, I wanted so much to go after her. But her father, Edward, had held me down, telling me that she needed to be alone to think things through. I was so mad at him. Not for restraining me, but for causing those images in the first place!
How could he even think back on those? Didn't he know how much pain she would go through- goingthrough? The thought nearly made me jump into the forest and rip it apart looking for her, which I would gladly do. But I realized that Nessie did need some time to think things through. I would only make it worse, after all, I had wanted to kill her the most of them all (well, it was a tie between me and Edward). So I would wait. I wasn't sure how long it had been, but the Sun was straight up above, and I realized I had been standing there for nearly two hours.
Someone behind me made me jump.
"Leah, what are you doing here?" I asked in surprise.
"Oh, you know, thinking." She answered. Well, that didn't answer anything. But at least I had a distraction. Ever since when I had broken off from the pack and Leah joined me, we always had this special friendship between us. Of course, after I had imprinted on Renesmee she had been a little bitter. That is, until she stared to actually like the world, and now she was the best of friends with Nessie, coming over almost every day.
"Oh yeah, and what are you thinking about?" She turned to look at me.
"I'm thinking about you, Jake."
"What about me?" This time I was genuinely curious.
"I was thinking about you imprinting on the bloodsucker." Now I wished I hadn't asked. I gritted my teeth.
"That's none of your business Leah." I almost forgot how much she was a brat before we were friends. "And don't call her bloodsucker," I added. She rolled her eyes, not caring, and went on.
"I mean seriously, how could it be her? She's our enemy, Jake. I mean, Bella was pushing it, hanging out with vampires and all, but then you just played down. You could do so much better."
"Shut up Leah. I love Nessie, and in the future, you tow are actually best friends, so why don't you just quite while your ahead."
She snorted, "Me? A friend of her? I doubt that." I rolled my eyes. Of course she wouldn't believe me, but she will when it happens, when one day she comes over and hangs out with little fourteen year old Nessie. At first I had been confused and wondered why she had become friends with her in the first place, but then I realized that Nessie always had such a weird talent of rapping everyone around her fingers.
It's what made me love her. And I did love her. And thinking about it only made it worse, and I felt the pull to go find her grow stronger.
"Besides, the only reason you agree with me id because she's your imprint." She said imprint like it was a bad word, a curse rather than a blessing.
"After all, you said it yourself today. Your other self, anyway. He said he'd never wanted to be forced into love, that his one true love was Bella, because you actually fell in love with her."
"Yeah, Leah, well that wasn't true love, as you say, either. You know why? Because the pull I felt for Bella was just Renesmee." At this, Leah said nothing, so I continued, "So the fact is that I really do love Renesmee, and she is the one for me. She always was. Since the dawn of the world, we were destined to find each other."
She just stared in silence, until I heard from a distance two people running toward us.
"Well, go hand out with your leech, Jacob, but no this; she shouldn't exist and you deserve much better. But hey, it's your life, so do what you want with it." And then she left, and a giant wolf and girl entered the yard. At the same time we both ran up to each other. I gave Nessie a giant bear hug, hugging her as tightly as I could (at least, as tightly without hurting her). Then she took my face in her hands and kissed me. It was long and passionate, and when she was finished I wished that it didn't have to end. Then I was conscious of a wolf watching us.
I looked up and there stood a hairier, reddish-brown, familiar wolf in front of us.
"Is that-?" She nodded.
"He helped me with a few things." She explained.
"Nessie, I'm so sor-"She stopped me with another kiss, and said, "I know, but it wasn't your fault Jacob, I know that now." I nodded and then kissed her again.
"Get a room." I turned to the house where Quil and Embry watched us.
"Do you mind?" I asked them.
"Well, this is…awkward. We wouldn't have barged in if we'd known." Quil apologized.
"Dude, this is far beyond awkward, like, more like bizarre. I mean, it's like watching a person make out with a tiger."
Nessie turned to me and smiled. "Tiger? Interesting choice of words…" And then she sprang onto my back. I tried playfully to get her off. She giggled.
"This is disturbing." Paul said, coming out from the house. I didn't care, I wasn't listening. Then I heard four pair of wolves running toward us, then stopping, phasing, and then Quil, Seth, Paul, Sam, Embry, and Leah walked through the trees. The all gasped.
"Dude, I thought you were kidding!" Seth exclaimed at the sight of the double Quils and Embrys. Then Nessie hopped off my back and ran over to Leah. They hugged.
"Hey, I'm so sorry about yesterday!"
"No problem, it's not like you planned on getting a migraine. How are you feeling?"
"Better, in that sense anyway. Things have been a little chaotic." Then they plunged into their own conversation while the past pack watched in disgust. Even old Sam was watching with obvious disbelief.
"Isn't she adorable?" I said in an admiring voice as she talked to Leah about the night before. Paul gawked at me, and then turned to his future self.
"How can you stand this?" Paul shrugged. "I guess if she wasn't so darn cute and my best friend's girlfriend, I'd hate her." Nessie turned to Paul, saying with mock emotion, "Oh Paul, I feel the same way about you too!" That earned a chuckle from future Paul, but the other one still looked disgusted.
"How's Claire, by the way?" She asked future Quil, making the other jump at the name.
"Claire?" he asked. Nessie nodded.
"Yeah, she's like, my best friend, one of my best friends, anyway." Ness answered, looking at Leah.
"How old is she now?"
"Eighteen." Then Quil looked at my Nessie.
"But you're eighteen, and Claire was three when you were born. How is that possible?"
"I grew rapidly for a year and stopped at four years old by the end of it. Then I grew for another fourteen years regularly. That's how I'm Claire's age." Nessie stated. I finally noticed as she was talking that someone was in the sideline, watching us all, I looked and saw my human self. He looked almost exactly as I did, except younger and perhaps shorter. We locked eyes for a moment, and then he said quietly so only I could hear, "I'm going back into the forest. Tell them I'll be back in a few. Just need to…sort things out." Nessie heard him though, and came up beside me, smiling.
"OK, you do that Jake. I'll see you later." He nodded and then left. It was so weird. I felt jealous of him, jealous that she had told her what was on her mind and that he was the one who had helped her. And yet, he was really me, but not really me. Nessie looked up at me, and then laughed.
"Oh, come on, Jake! You can't be serious!" She had obviously seen the jealousy in my eyes. She sighed, and then let the whole conversation flood into my mind. After that, she quickly pecked me on the lips and pulled me toward the house.
"Come on!"
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