A/N: So the main character has finally reached the doctor and is ready to have a session with them. If only Syngenesophobia could get there that quickly…
(I wrote that cute little joke before the latest chapter of Syn came out. It was so funny to me then, so I'm not changing it.)
The warm, fuzzy feeling Lana got from seeing that picture of her family was very much contrasted with the cold, almost sterile environment that was the doctor's waiting room. As her mother and father patiently sat there, reading the magazines that were provided and occasionally sneaking glimpses of their daughter, Lana couldn't help but let her mind wander a bit. There was something about this room that she was unnerved by, something unfamiliar… alien. She pondered on it, before she realized what it was.
This room was very clean.
Not the same clean as when someone would vacuum the living room (and that was bad enough). It was an inhuman clean; no marks or stains of any kind, and a color palette that was as mechanical as it was plain, with its whites and grays and very light blues. The furniture also matched the color scheme. Perhaps to other people the lack of bright colors and dirtiness would be calming and relaxing. But Lana was not like other people. Her natural habitat was the dirt and the mud, so the absurd levels of cleanliness made the wait far more Kafkaesque than it already was.
Not that Lana knew what the word 'Kafkaesque' meant, but she knew the feeling of hopeless alienation and powerlessness.
She rubbed her eyes a bit tiredly. The events of last night, coupled with the fact that she awoke fairly early this morning, had denied her the healthy amounts of sleep. Of course, under these circumstances, she considered that a blessing…
"Lana… Laood?" came the voice of the secretary. Lana knew that people had often gotten their family name wrong, so she got up off the horrid couch and walked over to the young woman. The secretary nodded and grabbed her firmly and strongly by the hand, discomforting the young tomboy. She led Lana down a very narrow and claustrophobic hallway, on both of her sides, tall and intimidating doors, with the same repulsive colors as before. Finally, she stopped in front of the last door on the right.
"Doctor will see you now," she said before she walked off rather quickly.
Lana gulped, and grabbed the cold handle of the door before opening it.
The inside was fairly cramped as well. On the walls were very uncomfortable and nightmarish posters; images of people being tortured by monsters, and demons dancing around rotting brains.
But as Lana looked more closely at the posters, she begun to notice something even more odd about them. She squinted at them, before covering her mouth in horror, as she recognized what was so off about them. Those people in the posters weren't just drawings of random people.
They were her siblings.
She saw Lori, with a horrific expression of fear on her face, being dragged away by hands without bodies. She saw Leni with tears in her eyes as she reached out to her sister, trying to grab her, but missing because her hand was shackled down with chains. She saw Luna and Lynn chased by wolves, Lisa sinking in the quicksand, holding Lily up as high as she could to keep her away from the pit. Lana's eyes scanned the poster with tears, until she found what she was looking for.
Lola, beaten and bloody, lying on the ground.
Dead.
Lana felt as if she was about to vomit, and not for the usual reasons.
Who would make something like this?
Perhaps the same person that would grab a confused young girl and violently throw her into a chair.
Now Lana was completely terrified. "Who are you? What's going on?"
A large oafish doctor with a hunchback grinned wildly and crazily at her. "I'm the doctor," he said in a creepy sing-songy voice, "I want to help you. I need to analyze your mind, soooooo…"
The doctor reached into his bag and pulled out a large, rusty machete. "I'D LIKE TO SEE YOUR BRAIN, PLEASE," he shouted before laughing manically, as he lifted the dirty weapon over his head, and the terrified Lana started screaming…
"Lana, Lana, wake up, LANA!"
The young girl felt she was being shaken, and found herself opening her eyes to see her mother shaking and slapping her lightly, trying to get her to wake up. "M…mom?" Lana asked in confusion.
"Oh thank God," Rita said as she hugged her daughter. Lana realized what had happened.
She had dozed off, and had another nightmare.
At this point, Lynn Sr. turned to the secretary. "That is it. I demand to see the doctor this instant," he demanded aggressively.
"Calm down, sir. You were about to go in anyways," the secretary calmly responded, though her eyes were on Lana as she said that. Lana figured that she must have been reacting to her nightmare in the real world, which caused her a fair bit of shame.
"Good," Lynn Sr. said before he turned back to his family, "Don't worry about a thing, Lana. Whatever you saw, it can't hurt you now. And you're finally… finally going to get some help…" he trailed off towards the end. It appears he couldn't even try to hide his exhaustion and worry anymore.
The three family members entered the office of the psychiatrist, which, to Lana's relief, was not plastered with images of horror. In front of them was a wide desk, covered with papers, pens and a very old computer, and sitting behind that was a middle-aged man, eyes glued to the computer screen. As soon as the Loud family entered, he looked away from the screen.
"Ah, Loud family. Please, please, take a seat, while I try to work with this piece of junk" he gestured towards the small chairs in front of his desk. The three of them took their seats. "Thank you for seeing us on such short notice, Doctor," Lynn Sr. said.
"No problem. Usually you have to wait a bit of a while, but seeing your… circumstances, and the fact that my good friend Dr. Lopez spoke for you, I thought it be best if we didn't delay," the doctor then looked at Lana. His eyes studied her for a bit, noticing the slightly colored bags under her eyes and slightly pale skin tone. He sighed; why must a young girl suffer like this?
"Hello, Lana," he addressed her directly, "My name is Dr. Otto Mata."
"Nice to meet ya," said Lana, trying to recover a bit of her old personality, "You know, you have a really weird name."
Turns out a sleep deprived child doesn't have the best judgment skills.
"Lana," Rita scolded.
"Oh, I assure you, my name is very normal back where I'm from. It's a very traditional… um... Dutch name."
"Yeah, well, when my sister Lynn makes up fake names, she always claims that they're Dutch."
"I guarantee you that I'm not making this name up. What, do you think I'm some kind of… former solider that went crazy on the battlefield… who sold out all his fellow soldiers to the enemy… scammed a local man out of his identity… got a green card marriage just to get back into the country… set up shop as a psychiatrist despite very few credentials… skimmed a college textbook to get a vague idea of what they were supposed to do… and has been living a lie ever since…" Otto paused for a second, looking out the window thoughtfully.
Everyone else was silent. "We… no one said anything like that," said Lynn Sr. uncomfortably.
Otto looked back at them. "Of course not. I'm just joking. Its healthy for the brain to get a small laugh, especially in stressful times," he said as he started laughing.
The Loud family members gave awkward laughs, if only to be polite.
"But all jokes aside," said Otto as he winded down from his amusement, "I think we need to confront this problem head on, and as soon as possible. Now, I have some suspicions about the nature of your little girl's problem, but I can't confirm them without a private session. As such, I would like to politely ask you two to leave."
The Loud parents looked shocked at this. "Absolutely not," snapped Rita as she grabbed her daughter, "I don't want to leave my little girl again. She had a nightmare in the waiting room, and I… I… she…"
"Mrs. Loud," Otto interrupted, "As admirable as your love of your daughter is, I need a one-on-one session where she can tell me the specifics of her problem. And with you two here, there may be some things she is unwilling to admit or mention."
The Loud parents looked as though they were in internal conflict with themselves. They looked at each other, and nonverbally agreed to listen to the professional. They give a small nod, and got up from their chairs. Lynn left the room immediately, but Rita took a second to give her daughter a kiss on the head. "If you need anything, just call for us," she whispered before exiting the room.
And then there were two. Lana stared at the doctor, while the doctor stared back. They were silent as they looked at each other, almost as if they were studying each other. After a uncomfortable amount of time had passed, Dr. Otto made a small cough into his hand, and decided that he should be the one to begin the talk.
"So, Lana, how are you holding up?"
Lana had already begun to debate with herself whether she should tell the doctor about her issues, or lie to him about everything. Should she admit to him all the disturbing scenes she saw in her sleep, at the risk of him prying more and more into her life, or should she play it off, at the risk of never getting the treatment she needs. Lana never considered herself 'shy,' but if what she heard about these people was true, then they could find out things about her that she wouldn't want anyone to know.
Lana shook her head. No, it was important to get better. Her parents were going to spend God-knows-how-much on her treatment, her siblings were worried to death about whether she would be OK or not, and Lola…
She owed to her, and to them to get better, no matter what.
"I'm… not doing so fine, Doc. I even had a bad dream right as we were waiting for you."
Otto nodded. "And why did you fall asleep while you and your parents were waiting?"
"I guess I didn't get enough sleep last night, or most of the nights before that, really."
The psychiatrist nodded again. He pulled out a large notebook and a pen and began to jot down notes. Interferes with normal sleep. Feelings of tiredness. Falls asleep at inappropriate times.
"Now, Lana, I want to talk to you about your nightmares. I want you to give me the most honest answers possible. I want you to not leave out any details. Anything, no matter how small, can be very important. Do you think you can do this?"
Lana nodded with confidence.
"Alright. When you have these nightmares, what do you usually see?"
Lana thought about it for a moment. "It's usually different, for the most part. There's always something scary, but sometimes its aliens, sometimes its monsters, sometimes its… mad scientists."
Dr. Otto felt his ears go a little red when he heard that, but he ignored it. "OK, but is there something else that always is there? Something that always happens? The same... theme, if you will."
Lana scratched her head. She tried to remember each and every single one she had recently. They were always so terrifying, so that was one thing that united them. But… there was something else. Lana could feel it, but she couldn't remember…
"Sorry. I don't recall nothing."
The doctor sighed, and took more notes. Nightmares interfere with her English skills.
"Very well. Tell me, Lana, about when you started having these dreams."
The young girl shrugged. "I mean, I always had nightmares. But back then they were easy to handle stuff like showing up to a test without studying, falling from a high place, my siblings chasing me with a hose and soap… actually that last one wasn't a dream," Lana said with a bit of an impish grin.
But then the grin disappeared. "But if we're talking about the nightmares I have now, the ones that are really getting to me," she paused, then let out an unhappy sigh, "they must have started about… a week ago."
Vivid nightmares started approximately a week from this date.
"Lana, you know what the obvious question is now."
Lana nodded. "You're going to ask me what happened one week ago."
Dr. Otto gave a small smile. "Clever girl. So, what happened that could've caused such powerful visions?"
Lana thought about it, and Dr. Otto couldn't help but notice how quickly her body language changed as she did. She slumped down into her seat, with her arms firmly crossed, as if it were a literal way of keeping herself from opening up. Her facial expressions changed as well; before they had been a mix of shy, confusion and occasional happiness or amusement. But now it was a very strong discomfort, with strong negative emotions. He recognized it as disgust, anger and… resentment.
Resentment. Like the letters of a novel, it was written all over.
The girl had mentioned siblings before, Dr. Otto recalled, And, judging from what I've heard and seen, it's a large family with a bit of dysfunction. Nothing too drastic, but still, to a little girl, anything could be exaggerated. Perhaps that's something I need to hit on.
"Lana… what happened between you and your siblings last week?"
The hostile expression on the tomboy's face immediately returned back to normal, as if the doctor's voice had reminded her where she was. "Wha… what? Nothing happened. Everything's great, like…"
The doctor held up his hand, to stop the girl from continuing. "When we started this session," he began, "you agreed that you would give me honest answers. No lies, no fibs, no fictions."
The girl still hesitated. "It's really not a big deal," she said in a low tone.
Dr. Otto rubbed his chin, and took some more notes.
Appears that the catalyst for her issues involved her family members in some shape or form. She also does not want to come to grips with this. She remarks 'Not a big deal,' as if she were attempting to convince herself and not me. Any further prodding will just alienate patient.
"Okay, Lana, let's drop this for now. But, when you come back for the next meeting, or maybe the meeting after, I need you to tell me the specifics of what happened. Take your time, and tell me whenever you feel like, but…"
"I think I remember something now."
The doctor titled his head a bit, interested. "Go on," he said.
The young girl's lip trembled a bit, as she prepared herself to say the next part. She opened her mouth to continue, but no noise came out. Dr. Otto offered Lana a glass of water, which she took with a look of appreciation. After wetting her throat, she tried again.
"When you asked me before… about what I always see in these dreams… there is one thing…"
It was clear to the psychiatrist that Lana was having a hard time saying what she wanted to. Her tone screamed of uneasiness, indicating to Dr. Otto that what she was going to say next was going to be very important for her healing process. The doctor gripped his pen, waiting for Lana to finish her sentence.
"What happens in my dreams… it isn't about me, it's about my family. Every time, something… bad happens to them," the young girl continued, sounding as if she was on the verge of tears, "They always have bad things happen to them, and I can never do anything. Sometimes… all the times... I see them… die…"
Lana felt tears start to roll down her face, as she began to cough a little. It was too much for her; why did she have to end up like this? Why did she have to have nightmares? Why was she so tired and stressed? Why did she have to recall all the horrible things that happened to her family in her dreams? Why couldn't she just be normal? Why? Why? WHY?
Dr. Otto wanted to comfort the girl, to reassure her with comforting words, but as soon as she started tearing up, the door swung wide open, and Rita Loud barged right in, scooping up her daughter in a warm embrace, tears on her face as well.
"Oh honey, it's alright, it's alright…" Rita gently whispered into her little girl's ear.
The doctor knew this was unorthodox, and he was planning on chewing out the Loud mother for standing in the door and listening, breaching the privacy of the patient. But he noticed how comforted Lana seemed by her mother's presence, so he allowed them to continue their needed hug.
After Lana stopped sniffling, she broke away from her parent's arms, and turned her gaze back to the doctor. "Can I… can we end this session?"
Dr. Otto nodded. "Of course. I would like to speak to your parents alone now anyways. Please, have a seat in the waiting room, and feel free to tell anyone there to get you something to drink. If they say no, tell them Dr. Otto says they're fired."
Lana laughed a bit at that, before turning back to her mother and giving her another small hug. This one was quicker than the last, but it still felt good, and comforting, for both parties. Lana left for the waiting room, and after a few moments, her father appeared in the doorway.
"Doctor, I promise you that I told my wife not to eavesdrop…"
"Oh, just sit down, you two," Dr. Otto said. After both parents were seated, he continued.
"While it's too early to say what is going on with your daughter, I can confirm that my suspicions were wrong. I believed your daughter had Dream Anxiety Disorder, and that she would have to be given medication to keep her issues under control, and that would be it," he rubbed his forehead in annoyance, "So as much as I hate to admit that I was wrong, I can see some other courses of action we need to take from here."
"Anything, doctor," said Rita quickly, her voice filled with maternal instinct.
"Well, first off, I would like to request another session, perhaps over the weekend. In addition, I will write a prescription as I usually do, but there is something more important than needs to be done. Your daughter appears to have developed these issues following an... incident, of some sort, involving most of, if not all, her siblings," he then narrowed his eyes at Rita, 'Of course, you know this already from your eavesdropping, Mrs. Loud…"
Rita blushed a bit from embarrassment, and tried to pass it off with a small chuckle.
"… but my point is; the girl needs to confront whatever happened between her and her family. Otherwise, this problem will persist for a very long time, and I hate to think of such a sweet young girl suffering like that."
The Loud parents nodded. "We'll… we'll see what we can do," said Lynn Sr.
"Good," said Dr. Otto, "now leave me alone."
The doctor stood up to shake both of their hands, and give them the prescription. He watched as they both left to go pick up their daughter (who had better have gotten her drink he thought to himself). Dr. Otto couldn't help but sigh; this was going to be a difficult case. Best if he took his mind off of it.
He opened a folder on his computer titled Writings and opened another folder titled Like A Bad Dream. It was a novel he had been working on for some time, about a young boy named Leif, who was being tormented by ghosts that kept him from sleeping. Stupid, he knew, but at least it was a proper novel and not some kind of a worthless fanfiction. He shrugged, and got to typing on his computer.
"You know," he said to himself, "I can't help but wonder if I should make things work out for Leif or not."
He then glanced at the seat that had previously been sat in by the Loud family. "One thing's for sure," Dr. Otto said, "I hope the best for young Lana."
Dr. Otto Mata, everyone. The most suave, poetic, and dare I say, handsome doctor in all the world. And ladies, he's single.
Hope you all enjoyed. This ends the "beginning" of the tale, and from here we move on to the middle part (I think, and hope, the chapters might get longer too). And it turns out that Lana's problems aren't just some random stroke of bad luck. Find out the real reason next chapter… or the one after that… or 50 chapters down the line.
But seriously, it's not going to be revealed next chapter. But we do get the first appearance of a certain bicycle mechanic ;)
And if anyone caught that reference to one of my previous stories; you don't know how happy that makes me :)
And as for everyone else; thanks for reading.