Hinata ran out into the darkened street, not knowing where she should go.
"Damn him." Tears drifted on the wind, trailing out behind her.
She was obviously very upset. The people she rudely brushed past could readily tell that much. They didn't need to see the tears or hear her sobbing.
"Damn him to hell!" Frazzled even more by her choice language, the white-eyed girl became tangled by self recrimination, nearly causing herself to trip in a very physical and tangible way. "Why did I do all that? It was so stupid. And it was for nothing!."
The sky was heavily clouded. There was no sign of the full moon that should have lit her way home. The scent of rain was on the air. A storm was coming. The distant flashes of lightning served as confirmation of that fact.
"I should have known what would happen." Her throat was tight, and she found it hard to breathe. "I never should have gone to the bar. I never should have hoped." She nearly tripped over a wind-blown garbage can. "I never should have been born."
The people on the street watched as she ran past, seeing her form appear and disappear as she passed under the street-lamps lining the avenue.
One of her high heels broke off, caught between the misplaced stone in a section of the street that was undergoing repairs. For a few moments, her steps made an awkward asymmetric sound. Stopping, she broke the heel off of the other shoe.
It didn't matter.
She never wanted to see those shoes again when she was finished with them. She wishewd that she was versed in fired-based jutsus, so she could burn all of her clothing in its entirety after she got home. It stank of drink and smoke. What's worse, it would always be a painful reminder.
Every step she took found her alternating between sorrow, anger, and confusion. Her heart was broken. She was angry at Naruto, and furious at herself. She didn't know what she would do with the rest of her life, now that her dream was gone. One thing was certain. She didn't want to see any of the other girls tonight. She didn't want to see anyone.
Hinata stopped at the cross roads, watching as small groups of shinobi and common citizens headed to the dance, or wandered away from it, looking for food, drink, or a place to share time with their companions.
No one else was running. No one else was alone.
Peering down one avenue, she shook her head. She doubted that any of the happy villagers looked or smelled the way she did, either. How could she possibly go home like this? She was drunk. She reeked like the bottom of an ashtray. She looked like she had been put through a rinse cycle and a vigorous spin dry. What could she possibly say, if Hanabi caught sight of her? What explanation could she offer, if her father caught even a single whiff?
Where else could she go? How could she clean her clothing or get a fresh set of clothes?
Biting her lip, she nodded her head. She would check and see if Kurenai-sensei was home. She doubted it, but there was no one else she could bring herself to talk with at the moment. Her teacher always had a good perspective on things. She had seen the good side and bad side of relationships on more than one occasion… her own, and those of her peers. She hated to intrude, though. The older woman, her pregnancy showing, probably still mourned Asuma.
The wind kicked up, blowing a few discarded newspapers past her like enormous moths. A few drops of rain, harbingers of the approaching storm, splattered against her forehead.
"Naruto-kun…."
Hinata began running again, even though she knew she couldn't outpace the memory of what had happened that night. Worse than that, there was no way to erase everything that she had done. She had gone to a pub. She had downed numerous drinks. Way too many drinks. Far more than she could ever hope to remember. She had flirted in ways that weren't anything likeher. No doubt, word of thatwould find its way all over town. Her poor mother would soon be turning over in her grave.
And, when she should have just held her chin up… grabbed her coat… and walked out of the bar… she had run out crying, raising a ruckus, and making her presence there far more memorable than it would have been otherwise.
Not only that, but she had done it all in front of him.
But, that was the problem in the first place, wasn't it. Him. Naruto. The only boy she had ever set her sights on. The only person who had ever given her reason to better herself, to look to the future, and to have hope.
Poor Hinata.
Poor stupid and cowardly Hinata.
So cowardly that she had been afraid to tell Naruto the truth. She really had been worried about him, needing make sure he was OK. But she had been afraid he would turn her away if she told him why she was really there.
She had been too scared to risk that. It would have defeated her second purpose. Now, feeling exposed despite the cover of darkness, she thought herself despicable and dirty, realizing what she must have been doing, even though she had been doing it on a subconscious level. She had been opportunistic, hoping to take advantage of Naruto's pain, getting him to look at her when Sakura had pushed him away in such a thoughtless manner.
"H-How could I h-have thought to c-compete with Sakura…." As she ran down the next alley, stopping and plastering herself against the walls with the deepest shadows whenever she caught sight or sound of someone else, a number of old sayings skittered across her mind. She had read them out of her diary, shortly before she had applied the last of her make-up and headed for the dance. She had been trying to build up enough confidence to walk up to Naruto at the dance.
'It is easy to be brave from a safe distance.'
Yes. That had been the story of her life, where Naruto was concerned. The only time she had ever truly gotten the courage to think about acting was when he was far from view. Proof of the matter was the time he had returned to the village after his training with the Legendary Sannin. Shino had approached him, only to be upset that Naruto hadn't recognized him. Kiba and Akamaru had greeted him as well. But, she had stood quivering in an alleyway, flummoxed, by no means ready to speak to him.
But, tonight, she had gone to that bar. A number of times, helped by the Sake she swallowed, she had blurted out the truth, only to cover it up or have it drowned out by one noise or another. So close, and yet so far! Now, all she was doing was putting more distance between the two of them. This wasn't the first time she was running away like this. It happened in some of her dreams. But, in those marvelous fantasies, Naruto would follow, beg her forgiveness, and then realize where his heart truly lay.
"N-N-Never. Not for m-m-me…."
Her dreams were just that. Dreams. The events of dreams are often impossible. Or, if not impossible, unlikely to occur in physical reality. Most of the time, they are also outside the control of the dreamer. The one exception to this is known as lucid dreaming, in which dreamer realizes that he or she is dreaming, and can sometimes change the dream environment and various other aspects of the dream.
Still feeling rather tipsy after her uncharacteristic binging, the grief stricken girl hardly considered herself lucid, dreaming or not. But, she didn't need to be lucid to feel as if her entire world was crashing down around her. She didn't need a clear head to feel hopeless and helpless. She knew exactly where she was, but still felt more lost than she had at any time in her life. That included the terrible day of her mother's death, and the afternoon that her father sent her away with Kurenai.
'Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true.'
That had sounded so profound. But, all it did was get her hopes up. Had she failed because her dreams were unreachable? Or, had she seen success drift out of her reach, because she had hesitated to tell Naruto how she felt? No. It couldn't be that. If it was, the truth would haunt her the rest of her life.
"It's… it's not like he could think about anyone but S-S-Sakura…." Hinata had heard that name enough for one lifetime.
Sakura this. Sakura that. How Naruto missed Sakura. How Sakura had done him wrong. Sakura was beautiful. Sakura was the only girl who mattered. Sakura… Sakura… Sakura.
It just wasn't right!
The thing that Hinata wanted more than anything else seemed far out of her reach, like the highest apple on the tallest tree. But, for Haruno Sakura, the same fruit lay there for the picking, at a low hanging branch within easy reach. So, with that shiny read apple ready for the picking, what did the pink-haired girl do? She treated Naruto like he was an apple with a worm in it. No. She treated him like an apple when she wanted oranges… plums… peaches… even kumquats… anything but apples!
'Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly.'
Her dream would die.
Sure, Naruto could get over the pain of Sakura's rejection. He might mope over her for a while, but he always found some way to get his life back on course, no matter what fate threw in his way. But, that wasn't the point, right? That really wasn't her major obstacle. Before tonight, she had told herself that he hadn't noticed her because she was too quiet. She had told herself that a girl with pink hair would naturally catch his attention, especially since he saw her so often.
But, for her to hold fast to the hope that Naruto's attention might turn to her after he wrote Sakura off as a lost cause, she would need to believe that she herself was someone he could become interested in. How could she ever pray for that, now? He had treated her like she was one of the boys!
"A broken winged bird that cannot fly." Hinata felt her eyes welling up with tears again. She had run out of sobs for the moment. "That's me." She stood with her forehead against cool moist brick.
Neji had considered himself a bird in a cage. That was back when he thought that everyone had a Destiny they couldn't escape. That was before Naruto had stood up to him during a fight he shouldn't have been able to win. That was when her cousin lost his match, but ended up the tournament's biggest winner in his own way.
Hinata looked up at the night sky, as if she might see someone or something there that could tell her why things happen the way they do. But, as expected, the clouds had no better insight than she did. All she could see was the irony. Neji had gone out to defeat Naruto… mocking him… even threatening to kill him if he didn't back down. Naruto ended up releasing him from his self-imposed bonds, and had helped him build a bridge between the Branch and Main families. She on the other hand had gone to comfort Naruto… wanting to be near him… hoping that he would see her as someone worthy of caring for. And for her efforts, she felt wrapped in pain and despair, standing on a bridge that went nowhere. She was a broken winged bird with no place to fly. A cage would have been heaven by comparison.
'Life gives every bird its food, but It does not throw it into its nest.'
"I know that," Hinata whispered. She swallowed hard and told herself 'enough about birds already!' Just the same, the saying struck a raw nerve. She had spent too many passive nights dreaming, fantasizing, or waiting for some kind of miracle to find her. Maybe Naruto will think this. Maybe Naruto will notice that. Maybe Naruto would do something or another. Maybe… maybe… maybe.
Shivering, she tried to will herself entirely sober. No such luck. Only time would take care of that. But, her trembling didn't come solely from the chill night air. Tipsy, she lacked the ability to lie to herself or hide from the truth. In the past, she promised she would be proud of herself just for trying, if ever she worked up enough courage to take even the smallest step. As feeble as her first attempt had been, at least it had been an attempt. But, she saw no reason to feel proud. No. If anything, she felt devastated. Maybe it was better to realize the truth, rather than getting false hopes from wishing and praying.
Hinata tugged at her hair. Her thoughts were so convoluted. She felt as if she were repeating painful and caustic points over and over, in one fashion or another. There was little doubt… she wouldn't get any sleep tonight. She probably wouldn't have a peaceful night's rest for weeks. Or months. Possibly years.
"It's not enough to aim…." That was something that Kurenai had told her and her teammates on numerous occasions. "You must hit…." That held true in practice. In combat. And, in everyday life. She had tried. But, trying wasn't good enough. Some people were simply better ninjas than others. Similarly, it seemed that some girls must be better than others.
'Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.'
That worked for Naruto.
Again, it was one of the reasons she admired him so much. It was why she had called him a 'proud failure.' But, it was becoming more painfully obvious by the moment that she was not Naruto. Maybe she was nothing like him. Sure, she had adopted his 'My Ninja Way' manner of speech. Yes, she had used him as her impetus to try harder and train more seriously. But, she had to wonder, would she be able to continue the same way, now that the foundation she had built everything on was crumbling? She hadn't built a house of stone or even wood. She had built a house of cards! She clenched her fists, trying to drive out such defeatist thinking.
Maybe she would rise up from all this, like a phoenix from the ashes, after her whole world burned itself down to the ground. Maybe she would surprise herself, finding a courage that she never knew existed. Maybe. But, not now. Not tonight. The loss seemed too big. The agony felt too fresh. All she could do now was get as far away from Naruto as possible.
A loud peal of thunder rumbled across the night. The rain began to pick up. Looking around her, she saw a number of couples hurrying along their way, huddled under umbrellas, or holding coats and other items over their heads.
She didn't want to be seen, in case anybody in those groups might recognize her.
Waiting in the shadows in the mouth of that alley, until all of the happy group had passed her by, she was struck by a mental image. Her coat. Her expensive new coat. It was still hanging on a hook at Inari's.
There was no way she would go back for it tonight.
"I was so stupid. Why did I go in the first place…." She just couldn't let go of it. It was almost as if she felt some need to punish herself, either for her failure tonight, or for being someone that Naruto couldn't care about. No. She hated herself for all the wrong reasons. She was angry because she had shattered that cozy little fantasy world, as pathetic as it was. "But… it… I had to…."
Hinata bit her lip, making a squeaking noise when she nipped too hard. She couldn't blame herself. Not if she thought rationally. Her feelings had crested, and she had needed something more than diaries and daydreams. Love itself can't feed on indifference. It needs to be wanted. Like a lamp, it needs to find fuel from someone else's heart, or its flame will burn low and go out.
"Naruto-kun…." Hinata hung her head again, letting the tears fall. No doubt, she would have numerous moments like this over the next few days, where images of him would flash before her eyes. Naruto failing at Henge. Naruto showing off for the other indifferent students. Naruto heading off to fight Neji. Naruto returning to the village. Naruto in that bar. "Why…."
She had been honest. She had been who she was. She had never once tried to pretend to be something that might want. Her eyes went wide for a moment, remembering her mental encounter with the shoulder devil… its suggestions… and her brief try at flirting. Her face grew warm. Taking a deep breath and letting it out, she steadied herself by thinking that it had been Hyuuga Hinata doing somewhat risqué, not her pretending to be some other type of girl. There really wasn't anything to be ashamed of. That is, unless someone in the establishment had recognized her, and felt compelled to tell her father what she had done.
"A least…." She sniffed, and then began to move out towards the well-lighted street. "…At least Naruto didn't notice…." She has been upset by his obtuseness earlier. Maybe it was for the better! She might never be able to show her face amongst their friends again, if he had taken note of her coquettishness and told the gory details to Shino or Kiba. "I don't know why I thought he might…." Now the emotion that flared up was anger, something she rarely found herself feeling. Anger and a touch of resentment.
She wanted to be loved for who she was. That was only fair, since she was willing to love Naruto warts and all. She tried to smile at her unintentional joke, seeing how the village's noisiest and most unpredictable ninja had a bond with toads; but, there was no spark left inside her.
It was hard, thinking how other people acted, and what they got as a result. So many people cared about others, only as far as they could get something from them. Some tried to change other persons, hoping to make them into something they want. Why did so many people like that seem happy? Why was she standing in the dark, dripping with rainwater, miserable?
"If only he would…." She shook her head. She was about to bargain with Fate, promising anything and everything, if only she could have her heart's desire. Denial wouldn't help. Neither would bargaining.
She started off again by walking, moving from dark spot to dark spot. As the crowds grew thinner the farther she got from the dance venue, she picked up her pace, jogging. Before she knew it, she was running, faster and faster, not sure why she was doing so. In a few minutes, she would reach Kurenai's home. She'd be OK there. She knew she would.
Wait.
She was not the only one running.
There was someone following after her. She knew that, because she took a number of sudden detours, and the person she sense behind her made the same exact moves.
Who was it? What did he or she want?
It couldn't be Kurenai, could it? Might Shino have placed a female bug on her again? Had Kiba and Akamaru become worried about her? She swallowed hard. It couldn't be an enemy in Konoha, right? There was no reason to given into wild fears, was there? It was not going to be a Cloud ninja come to attempt another kidnapping!
She slowed a moment. Accessing Byakuga, she tried to make sense of the findings at the fringe of her talent.
Oh no! That was the last person it should be!
Naruto.
x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x
Naruto was not always at his best when thinking.
That was a given. It wasn't that he was stupid. Not really. He rarely took time to think things through to their completion.
Furthermore, he did not usually come up with his best ideas for his own sake. Time and time again, his cleverest tricks… his bravest stands… his boldest actions… came to light when he was fighting for the benefit of another individual. Someone close to him. A precious person.
His teammates were his precious people. So were his friends. The last thing he would ever want to do is hurt one of them. He would rather take all of the pain upon himself. So, when his heart spoke, he listened.
Naruto was clearly drunk. The demon fox could only do so much. But, wrapped up in his pity as he might be, he wasn't so drunk that he couldn't realize that Hinata must be hurting, to run off the way she did. She must have been upset by something, to drink the so much. Near the end, she had matched him glass for glass. It had been irresponsible for him to put his own pain first. He should find out what was bothering her.
Maybe he could help her. Who knows? In doing so, hew might be able to distract himself, and find a better way to approach his own loss. Maybe. There was only one way to find out.
Worried as he was, he actually turned down a number of free drinks as he gathred up his nelongings. His level of concern grew when he saw that Hinata had run off without her coat. She must really be hurting! And, it would get nasty outside, if the flickering lights were an indication that a storm was moving in, rather than an unpaid electric bill or incandescent bulbs going bad. Suddenly feeling a burst of zeal and a sense of purpose, he wobbled to the door, overpaid his bar tab, and shouted out that he would track her down.
A roar from the patrons surrounded him, as he fumbled at the door handle. Some had grown to like the chatty ninja. Others were happy to see him leave.
Stepping outside, he found out there was a storm brewing, alright. His first clew was the sideways rain, courtesy of strong gusting wind. If that wasn't enough to sink past his drunken haze, the great zig-zagging bolts of lightning striking the distant hillside would have been. Soon, the streets wouldn't be fit for man or beast.
"This is the kind of storm that brings hail," Naruto said, sniffing the air. "The big kind!" He had better catch up to Hinata fast. She might need to hold her coat up over her head, to shield herself from falling ice.
Running, he slid to a stop after a couple of blocks, his keen eyes catching sight of something. There. In that small circle of light painting the cobblestones under the nearest street lamp. Two stick like objects.
High heels.
Had Hinata been in some kind of struggle? Probably not, since there were a fair number of people out tonight, and the streets were patrolled. And with gentle Fist and Kaiten, she would be the match for any civilian guys who might be feeling their oats. No shinobi would bother her. At least, no one from this village.
"I shouldn't assume anything," he stated, running again, making it a point to double his speed. Unfortunately, the sound of the wind and distant thunder made it difficult if not impossible to hear signs of a fight. "I may need a bit of your chakra here, stupid fox!" He frowned. The image he got was one of Kyubi rolled up like a dog in front of a fireplace. Stupid drunken fleabag!
"Yo!" That voice was familiar. Where had it come from. "Naruto!" Over there. Standing on top of the next street lamp. It was Kakashi. Maybe he had seen Hinata!
"Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto wondered what the Copy Ninja was doing up there? It wasn't all that uncommon to find him in places like that on a sunny afternoon… but in the midst of a growing storm? Was he looking for someone in particular? "Have you seen Hianta recently?" He felt antsy. He couldn't spend much time standing idle if his old teacher had no news for him.
"Yes, I did. That's why I stopped you." Kakshi looked Naruto up and down. His eyes lingered on the coat in Naruto's hand. He didn't mention that he was doing a favor for Kurenai, who had stayed at the dance longer than her condition warranted. She had been nervously waiting for Hinata to return from the bathroom, not knowing she had snuck out the back.
"Was she alright?" Naruto felt his pulse speed up. "Did it look like someone did something to her?"
"Funny you should mention that," Kakashi replied. "I was about to ask you the same question." He sounded nonchalant, but Naruto instinctively knew that the jounin was taking the current situation very seriously. Just what did he suspect? Him? Did his mentor think hat he had done something to Hinata?
"Sensei?" Naruto moved one foot back and forth. Kakashi noted that, then sighed.
"She looked very upset." Kakashi jumped down from his perch. He studied the younger man's face with his normal exposed eye. "I was concerned that someone had treated her… inappropriately…" The way the masked shinobi spoke that word had the hairs on Naruto's neck standing up.
"No… Kakashi-sensei… not me." Naruto held up his hands while he shook his head. "I would never treat her that way! I wouldn't let anyone treat a girl thatway."
"I figured that much. You look anxious to help her. And you have her coat." Kakashi seemed nonplussed as the rain increased. "But… I heard her mention your name as she passed by… unaware of my presence." That was as much a question as an observation.
"My name?" Naruto blinked rapidly. Why had Hinata called out his name? "That doesn't…." He shrugged. At the older ninja's request, he gave a brief recap of the time he had spent with the fleeing girl.
"You mentioned Sakura quite often, I assume." Kakashi ran a hand through his wet hair, and then flicked the water from his hand.
"Yes, that's why I was at Inari's in the first place." Naruto knew that his mentor was well aware of the screwed up dynamics of his team.
"And you really have no idea why the Hyuuga girl is upset…" The Copy Ninja shook his head. "…After spending almost the whole time talking about Sakura…."
"No. None." Naruto rubbed his nose, annoyed by the way his hair felt plastered to his head, " Should I?" He was sorely puzzled.
"Yes. By now, you should. You are no more observant now, than you were the day I tied you to that post." Kakashi sighed, thinking about the bell test. Did Naruto have the right stuff to be Hokage some day? He couldn't afford to be too naïve, not even where personal matters were concerned. "I don't know why I should have expected otherwise. That was my fault, I suppose."
"Well…are you going to tell me?" Naruto's voice went up an octave or two. He clenched his hands into fists. He did not like it when anyone implied that he was dense, not even Kakashi-sensei. "I don't have a lot of time, you know…." At this rate, he might never catch up. Hinata would reach home, or meet up with the other girls. But, that was OK, wasn't it? He could always give her the coat some other time.
No. It felt as if he had left a mission unfinished. Well. More than that. It almost felt as if he had left a comrade behind.
"No. I don't think I will. This is something you need to find out for yourself…." Kakashi held up a hand, snuffing out Naruto's rebuttal before it began. "… Or hear from her. I know that Jiraiya has taught you the importance of learning things on your own, back when he taught you Rasengan." He began walking away, waving his hand. Smiling under his mask, he new just the right task to get the other ninja to give his best. "I wouldn't have had to tell Sasuke…." With that, he flashed from view.
The drink was still strong in Naruto. But, when sober, he still hated that kind of comparison. It used to frustrated him to no end. "Why don't you just come out and call me an idiot or something?" Naruto put his hands on his hips. There was no reply. He frowned, thinking himself an idiot for still standing there.
He began running again. He'd show Kakashi-sensei. It was time to make use of his Swiss Army Knife jutsu, the one that he used for so many different purposes.
"Kage Bunshin…many clones!"
Suddenly, following a soft noise and rolling mushroom clouds of smoke, there was a whole street full of Narutos. True to the jutsu's power of replication, they were all rather tipsy. Some ran into lamp posts. Others tripped, causing a domino-like chain reaction. A few followed copies… that followed copies …that followed them.
The real Naruto watched as some groups ran in circles. "IDIOTS!" He shouted, and then smacked his head. He had enjoyed the luxury of ample time, getting used to the effects of the Sake he drank gradually, with the help of the demon sealed behind his navel. The copies were dealing with things all at once, de novo.
Fortunately, the shadow clones adjusted quickly as Naruto called out orders and acted as the field general. Soon, there were Narutos running down every street…looking in every open building…and checking down every alley, covered walkway, and palisade. Eventually, one of the clones stumbled upon Hinata's whereabouts. It immediately reported back to Naruto.
"Ha! Let's see an idiot do that!" Naruto posed, flexing his muscles. The clone popped out of existence before its creator asked for the girl's location. "Shit!" He stood there in the rain, cursing for all he was worth. Maybe he really was a moron.
Fortunately, another clone came with a similar report. Naruto asked for the information immediately this time.
As a particularly strong burst of thunder rattled the shutters on a nearby building, the young chuunin took off with a vengeance. Angry at Kakashi's attitude, and annoyed at his performance in a semi-inebriated state, he had grown claws and fangs again. But, the transformation brought with it keener senses.
That would help.
He covered ground at an amazing pace. Soon enough, he had picked up Hinata's scent in one of the alleys she had been standing in. Unconcerned about appearances, he took off running on all fours. Speeding along with only one thought in mind, he bowled over a number of people with umbrellas, before taking an amazing leap over a group of traveling monks.
One of the monks looking at his fellows, pulled a small flask of spirits out from under his habit, then tossed it into a nearby garbage receptacle. The others all followed suit. They thought they must have been seeing things.
"There!" Naruto caught sight of Hinata. He called forth a fresh group of bunshin.
She was running. Why? There was no one else around.
Naruto took to sprinting on two legs again. He fought to control his emotions and regain his normal form. This wasn't a fight against a curse seal enhanced Sasuke at the Valley of the End. This wasn't a battle against Orochimaru and Kabuto at their headquarters.
"Damn!" Those memories only had his fangs growing longer. "Calm down, Naruto. Calm down…." He wasn't there to fight Hinata. He was there to help her.
Closing the gap between the two of them, he remembered a debt that he owed her.
Back when he had trained so long and vigorously with Jiraiya, learning to control Nine Tail's chakra, he had found himself losing some of his usual confidence, as the time for his battle with Neji approached.
What good was it learning how to do a summoning? He should have learned some powerful jutsus useful in one-on-one combat! Over and over again, he had imagined himself biting his thumb, smiling his arrogant smile, saying something dramatic to Neji and the crowd, and then slamming his hand down…only to see a tadpole flopping around on the arena floor! The crowd wouldn't care if it had two, four, or no legs!
But, passing through the old training area… feeling a strong sense of nostalgia… he had come across Hinata. In contrast to his usual false bravado, he had admitted to her that he wasn't as strong as he pretended. He had been losing confidence at an exponential rate.
The normally quiet girl told him that she took inspiration from him. She told him that he had true strength. When she was done talking, he somehow felt energized again. Eventually, he had faced Neji and won.
So, he owed Hinata a lot for that. His confidence had begun snowballing after that victory. He had also helped Neji make a dramatic change in life. That wouldn't have happened without Hinata's small but important contribution.
If she was hurting, he would do his best to help her.
It was his Ninja Way.
x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x
Hinata ran.
She had no choice but to run into the wind, which had picked up considerably.
Small bits of sleet struck her in the face, making her close her eyes now and then. That may have been the cause of her fall.
Not seeing a protruding joint in the cement sidewalk she was running on, she tripped over it and took a hard spill. She tumbled onto the patio area of a café that had closed for the night. A number of iron café chairs were bowled over. Table umbrellas stood askew. There was no one nearby to offer assistance.
"Aieee…." Hinata winced. Her foot hurt. So did her shoulder. She had felt her clothing tear in a number of spots. "I must have done something bad, to deserve all this." She picked herself up and tried to maintain her composure.
She checked herself out more thoroughly. She had twisted an ankle. And, there was a long tear in her stocking, exposing a nasty friction burn. But, there was no time to just sit there. Naruto was getting close.
Much too close.
Thunder struck again, booming across the darkened stretch of street. The lightning strikes were much closer now. As soon as the one rumbling shot ceased, another took its place.
Up and down the street, people whistled to call their pets home. Storm windows came down here and there, and people struggled to close their shutters. Strange halos of light surrounded each of the street lamps.
As she began running again, pain shooting up one leg, Hinata saw other people ducking into doorways and under awnings. They were smart. None of them were not going to challenge the weather. She had little choice now.
There was no way she wanted to talk to Naruto. What good could it possibly do her? How could it change anything for the better?
'When the wine is in, the wit is out.'
Why did she think that? Sure, her judgment might be a bit skewed. But, this was not the time or the place to talk to him. She didn't owe him an explanation, did she? And, even if he tried to explain his actions, that wouldn't magically make her someone he could like. What had she been thinking, earlier? Heartbroken people don't suddenly change who they care about, no matter how much the other person cares for them. This wasn't a story book or one of those ridiculous soap operas!
"I hate clowns!" Hinata sensed that there was more than one Naruto following her. She bit her lip. She had meant to say something else, even though she really did have a powerful aversion to circus performers. "Clones… I meant clones…." She would never drink again!
There were a lot of things she would never do again.
"Oh!" Her bad ankle gave, and she found herself falling again. One hand dragged along the roughened street surface. Her blouse tore along the hem. One shoe had fallen off and was pirouetting perilously close to the lip of a storm gutter.
Hinata grew even more disgusted with herself. She was a seasoned ninja now. Why was she letting her emotions get in the way of her attention and physical performance? The only way things could be worse was if Naruto was there right now, watching her shameful performance, taking in her ragged look.
'Speak of the devil and he appears.'
"The boy's here," a tiny voice said in Hinata's ear. It was a devil alright, just not the one she meant. "It would have been easier if you stayed at the bar and unbuttoned a few buttons." The Shoulder Devil kissed his fingertips. "It gets them every time."
"Hurry," another voice said. The Shoulder Angel. "Don't let him see you crying." She paused, after taking out a small parasol, that quickly blew away in the wind. "You could always tell him the truth you know. The truth will set you free."
"She doesn't need any more stupid sayings," the devil asserted, pushing the angel off of Hinata. He fell too when his imaginary adversary snared his ankle with the hook of her fancy umbrella.
Willing away the pain, Hinata gathered her remaining strength. She began sprinting as fast as her body would allow, as if she were running from a massed enemy, with the safety of friendly lines only a few blocks away.
Naruto blocked her path.
She turned to run in another direction. He blocked her path again.
There! There is an opening over there! But, not for long. Naruto swiftly ran to that spot as well, getting there first.
"He's so fast. It's almost as if… there……are…more than one…." Hinata smacked herself in the forehead. Get a grip, girl! Of course there are more than one. The clones. You knew that. She closed her eyes, and sighed deep and long. "Please… Naruto…." It took an effort, but she left off the '-kun'. "…Leave me alone." Hinata had tried to sound stern, but sounded tragically hurt. Her shoulders slumped. The events of that evening were all weighing so heavily on her.
"You forgot your coat." As the clones disappeared in puffs of smoke, Naruto walked up and held out Hinata's coat. "And, its cold out." His mouth fell open when he saw the condition of her clothing. "You'll… well…. I didn't want you to get sick or something…." The two of them stood there, raining falling heavily now, as if people above the clouds were kicking over an infinite row of buckets.
"Ummm…. I…." Suddenly, Hinata found herself reduced to her timid school girl routine again. She wanted to scream. What was with her?
Wait. Was that the only reason he had run her down? Her coat? He was being considerate? In the middle of the storm swept street, he had finally begun caring how she felt. After all she'd put herself through? At his prompting!
"Ha…" Hinata couldn't help herself. She began laughing inappropriately. "Ha ha…." It really wasn't funny, but her actions weren't voluntary at the moment. "Now you decide to notice something…." Still, deep inside, she felt touched, knowing that Naruto had been worrying about her. Even swimming in the bottle of a glass, his heart on his sleeve for everyone to see, he had made it a point to look out for one of his friends. He was so very clueless sometimes; but, when he had someone else to focus on, he was one of the kindest and most generous people that she knew.
"Hinata, you're hurt!" Naruto noticed the blood running down her leg. "Did someone do this too you?" His voice was fierce. "If someone did, let me know who…."
"I fell," Hinata admitted, feeling like the biggest klutz alive. "I fell down a number of times." She gasped, seeing the red streaks washing down her leg. "It was… it's all… it's my fault." She felt the need to come clean welling up in her heart again. The pressure was too great to resist. "It's all my fault. Tonight… I… at the bar… I came to…." A confession rushed to her lips.
"You always were a bit clumsy, Hinata." Naruto chuckled and then stopped, hearing Hinata's gasp of pain when she moved her leg. "Here…I have something else to return."
He took the jar of ointment out of his pocket. "Maybe this would be a good time for me to return another favor." He though back to his match against Kiba, the one he had won with a fart. Hinata had offered him salve after that fight, even though he had just defeated her teammate. Unscrewing the jar, he leaned over to keep the contents out of the rain. "Here…." He took a large dollop of medicinal cream onto his fingertips.
"You don't have to…." Hinata shook her head. She couldn't let this distract her. "I was trying to say…."
"Don't be stupid," Naruto asserted. "You need help. You don't have to tell me that. I can see for myself." He tried to be gently, rubbing the salve onto Hinata's wounds. He hoped the rain wouldn't simply wash it away. Should he take of his pants and give them to her to wear? "Let me do this for you. Next time, you shouldn't go running off in the dark. You could have shared your problems with me. I would have listened."
"…." That claim left Hinata speechless for a moment. "I… you… you…." She was caught between conflicting emotions. Naruto's statement had her about ready to explode.
But, she had been shocked when his put his hands on her leg. Shocked and confused. Her face was warm. Was she blushing? Luckily, Naruto wouldn't be able to tell.
"I know you would do the same," Naruto continued. "You've always seemed to be ready to help when I needed it." He swallowed hard when a series of lightning flashes illuminated the area. He had gotten a very good view of Hinata's leg all the way up. The tear in her skirt was placed just right. "Uhhh…."
'Yes. That's because I've always been in love with you….' It was the perfect opening to say that. No one could have gifted her with a better opportunity. Still, like it was preordained, Hinata found her tongue tied in knots. "Yes… owww… wait…please, don't stop. I can handle a lot of pain…." Hinata closed her eyes. That was an understatement.
"Well, that's done." Naruto finally finished his ministrations on the worst of the visible injuries.. He noticed Hinata opening and closing one hand. "Here, let me see." He took her hand in his.
Hinata swallowed. She looked down at their hands. Hers seemed so small. Even though she had grown a great deal. His hands had gotten so much bigger. They were roughed by work and training she could only imagine.
For someone who could barely stay still, or keep his mouth from moving, he was oddly gentle and patient then, sitting out in the rain, his mane-like hair flat against his head and neck. When he had applied salve to her newest wound, he asked her if anything else hurt.
Her answer came before she had time to think.
"M-…M-…My heart…." Immediately, she cringed. She felt frantic, as if she needed to run again. Awkwardly, she stood up. She tripped when her ankle gave way again.Moving quickly, Naruto caught her.
"Hey, slow down, Hinata…." Naruto said. "You shouldn't even be walking on something like that."
Hinata felt Naruto's arms around her. He was so strong. She closed her eyes. She started slipping into a day dream, but caught herself. The arms were real enough. But, the body attached to them didn't care about her. Naruto was interested in someone else. His arms were only there to support her.
Unable to hold back her emotions any more, she began sobbing again. Her hands were trapped against her chest, but she made no move to put them around Naruto. He wouldn't understand. And, it wouldn't make any difference.
"Uhhh… hey… Hinata… what's…." Able-bodied and resourceful in battle, Naruto was at a total loss. He had no idea what to do when Hinata threw herself against him and cried like this.
"I'm s-s-sorry, N-N-Naruto-kun… I'm so very s-s-sorry…." Hinata's speech came out in stilted gasps. "I should be strong like you... I should be a… a… a proud failure…." She trembled, embarrassed and ashamed at her actions. "I have… I have a… I have a crush on…."
"Ahhh!" Naruto's eyes opened wider. "Now I understand!"
Hinata suddenly stopped sobbing. Her whole body twitched. She looked up into Naruto's eyes. "Y-Y-You do… N-N-Naruto-kun….."
"Sure! It doesn't take Uzumaki Naruto too long to catch on!" Naruto stepped back from Hinata and hooked a thumb in his belt loop. "You should know that by now." He hooked her arm around his shoulder. It was time to get out of the rain.
Hinata just stared, her mouth open. Then, she shook her head. "Then… I… you know that I…."
"You have a crush on someone. Yes. I know." Naruto nodded his head. He found himself smiling, despite his own sorrows. "That's what you said, right?" He nodded his head, and started them both walking. "I know how mixed up that can make someone. Believe it!"
Hinata saw the smile. He wasn't upset with her? He wasn't disgusted, annoyed, or amused? What was he thinking? Could everything she have gone through tonight have been for a reason? Had it all brought them to this one place and time?
'The heart has its reasons that reason knows nothing of.'
Her lips parted slightly, despite the pain. Both of her hands were clenched tightly. Her breathing came quicker and quicker. She drank in every feature of his face, when a flash of lightning painted the two of them with a yellow-white actinic glare. "Naruto-kun, I…." Finally. Finally finally finally.
"So," Naruto said, steering Hinata towards a large awning. "Tell me who the lucky guy is." Naruto cocked his head, a sly look on his face. "I promise I won't clue him in, if you don't want me to."
Hinata sat down hard, right in the middle of the only puddle within twenty paces. She hung her head. Was Fate mocking her?
"Hey… Hinata… don't do that!" Hinata lifted the stunned girl out of her watery seat. "You don't have to be all embarrassed or anything." He wondered why she wasn't trying to get to her feet. Could she be that shy? Boy, and he had thought that he was bad! "Geee-ee-ez… you heard me moaning and cursing for half the night… compared to that, you have nothing to be ashamed of…." Seeing that she wasn't budging, he decided to sit next to her in the middle of the slick wet street.
Hinata couldn't speak. She couldn't even think or reason at that moment. It felt as if she had been transported to some strange and distant dimension.
"Let's see if I can guess…." Naruto laughed. Maybe a little humor would shake the girl from her funk. "It shouldn't be too hard." he started off by running through the things he knew for certain. "I had a crush on Sakura. She has a crush on Sasuke. Sasuke has a crush on himself…." That wasn't entirely fair; but, so what! "Neji and Ten Ten are sneaking around like no one knows what's going on. Ino wants Shikamaru. So does Temari. He doesn't want to be bothered." He put a strong emphasis on that last word. "Choji likes Ino. Lee likes Sakura… who gets freaked out anytime he sees him getting googly-eyed." He laughed. "I doubt it would be Shino. He's a nice guy and everything… but… you now…."
Hinata just sat there, head bowed. She knew that Naruto's laughter was good-spirited, and wasn't even aimed at her. Just the same, she put a hand over her heart. Her chest felt tight.
"So… if it's not Shino…." Naruto rested his chin on his fist for a moment, oblivious to the way that rivulets were running into the openings of both pants legs. "Then-n-n…." He tried to snap his fingers. They were too wet. "That leaves Kiba." He grinned. "Unless you are into four legged guys. Akamaru. Kinky." He had hoped to get some kind of reaction out of Hinata. He failed.
Hinata stood up. Naruto joined her.
"Well, he's certainly the popular choice this season, isn't he." Naruto continued with his off-the-mark rambling. "No wonder you're upset. There's one hell of a waiting line." He felt his heart stumble. The good cheer left his voice. "Oh. Sorry. I get it. He probably just sees you as a friend."
Her legs were trembling, but Hinata was able to bring herself under control. Uncharacteristically, she began to get angry again. But, this time the anger felt good. It seemed right.
"I'm surprised that you didn't take him up on his offer then…." Naruto said sadly. He would have gone to the dance with Sakura, even if he knew she hadn't been doing it of her own accord. "…Even thought Kuernai was meddling. I guess you want someone to like you for who you are, huh?"
"Baka!" Hinata slapped Naruto. Hard. Right across the cheek. "You are so stupid!"
She bounced the ointment jar off of his chest, and then began running again.
Naruto stood watching.