Out
Chapter: Open the Door
Disclaimer: I do not own this fandom nor make any profit from the writing of this fiction.
The first week after Kurt returned home from the hospital was absolute torture. Finn found any reason possible to stay away from home so that he would not be forced to help the injured teen that he believed was always playing the victim when he no one but himself to blame for his situation. It was a major adjustment period for Kurt though, as he was forced to allow either his dad or Carol to help him with simple tasks that he had taken for granted before his beating, like being able to use the bathroom on his own, fix himself a snack or sleep in whatever fashion he wanted. The homosexual, young man also had to come to terms with the fact that with the injuries he sustained, there was a real possibility that he would never be able to reach his dream of Broadway. After three days of tears, Kurt was able to comfort himself with the knowledge that he was not a one trick horse. Even if he could never perform as he had, he would still be able to get out of Lima with his other talents. A silver lining appeared when Kurt found out he was being transferred from McKinley.
Even though Kurt had not been cleared to return to normal activities, such as school, Burt and Carol began the process of transferring the young teen to Dalton Academy. The process was fairly quick due to the danger surrounding Kurt's situation in spite of it being the middle of the year. It had been a devastating blow to find that even with the state authorities involved, that the football team would never be punished for their crimes against him. Instead it was made out to be his fault because of the way he flaunted himself (the state agents were Ohio natives and their roots showed in the fact that they acted the part of small-minded idiots) and the players were being protected by not only the local law enforcement but by the school and its staff as well. Even Coach Sylvester's hand were bound. However, for the moment the concern of the bullies was waylaid by Kurt's fortunate opportunity to attend the prestigious academy for boys.
They also gave him a scholarship to help with boarding fees and various student activities so that he would be able to participate in extra-curricular events at the school with his classmates. In addition to everything else, Kurt would have to attend sessions with the school counselor twice a week as an effort to help him move past the trauma and to acclimate him smoothly into his new environment. The new student was to have a room to himself as well due to all the other boys having been paired off the year (it was considered to be in Kurt's best interest due to his mental state).
It had been a week since Kurt had begun his new life at Dalton Academy and even though he had breathed in relief at not having to return to McKinley, he was still wary of his classmates despite the zero tolerance policy especially those larger than he. At the moment, his biggest issue was his annoyance at the Asian senior that had been following him for the last forty-eight hours. Wesley Montgomery, known as Wes to everyone but his mother, had heard Kurt singing to himself in the junior commons while he was completing his French homework and had immediately begged him to audition for the Warblers. The effeminate teen had declined on the basis of not knowing who they were which had led to a one hour rant about the Dalton glee club. He had still refused the older teen saying that he had too much on his plate already, thanked him for the offer and promptly left for his room. The Asian had followed him the entire way there attempting to get him to change his mind until Kurt entered his room and shut the door in his face. However, Kurt was not able to escape as the senior was waiting for him the very next morning and this time he had brought along his friend, David.
After forty-eight hours of perseverance, Kurt gave in and agreed to audition. Wes gave him a bright smile and told him to arrive in the senior commons at 5:00pm Thursday evening to try out. Kurt arrived half an hour early with a set of nerves he had not had since the first time he wore a trailing sweater in middle school. However, he walked through those doors at five o'clock with his head held high and gave the best performance he had had to date with 'Don't Cry for Me Argentina.'
His spirits lasted through the silence that followed him as he left so that the present members could approve or deny his application to their club, but they fell quickly when a dapper young man with hard-capped, gelled hair had told him not to try so hard next time. Kurt returned to his room as quickly as his braced leg would let him rather than await the verdict that the silence announced and the other teen had verified with his advisory statement. He had thought it was a great song to go with because it was one of his favorites and had not thought that he had done so badly that it came off as trying too hard.
For the next three days, Kurt became a master at avoiding Wesley whom did not know when to leave well enough alone. He had already humiliated himself and he did not wish to have the pushy Asian rub salt in one of his numerous wounds. Unfortunately, three days grace was all he was given before Wes cornered him coming out of his last class for the day which had ran a bit late.
"Could you please just leave me alone?" Kurt sighed tiredly.
"Kurt! I have been trying to talk to you for the past three days. You didn't even wait to whether or not you passed the audition before you were just…gone!"
"Yes…well after some well-placed advice and the fact that I did not want to join in the first place, I decided to save myself the trouble and put my effort into doing well in my classes. Now, if you excuse me, I have homework I would like to finish before dinner since I am leaving for the weekend." Kurt tried to pass the taller teen, but was blocked once more.
"What are you talking about Kurt… the Warblers approved your application. You are now a probationary Warbler." Wes looked at Kurt in concern. Now that he was observing the younger male more closely, he could see bags under his eyes and a rather depressed, defeated slump to his shoulders.
"That's great Wes, but I honestly don't think I am up to participating." With that final statement, Kurt was finally able to pass by the older teen and make his way back to his solitary room. At least there he did not have to deal with the fickleness that are other human beings.
Wes watched him go and wondered what had made the boy act that way. He had thought that Kurt was excited on audition day, but since then, it just looked like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. Something was wrong, something had happened and whether Kurt accepted it or not, he was now a Warbler and they had to do something about their newest member. The Asian teen decided to call an emergency meeting: the Warblers had things to discuss and a plan to make.
Kurt was not happy when he returned to school that Sunday afternoon. His weekend had been a disaster thanks to Finn's idiotic decision to invite Rachel and several of the football players to their house for the last of the good weather cook out that they were having. Kurt had stayed in his basement downstairs with the door locked and his windows blacked out with various craft items he had lying about. Burt had not been happy about it either because he had forgotten to specify that Finn should not invite any friends and most especially his jock friends whom were suspected, but were never proven, to have been Kurt's attackers. It was supposed to have been a strictly family only event, but the overly tall teen took dense to a whole new low. It had put Kurt in a bad mood for the rest of the weekend and he had been so eager to return to Dalton that he had taken his leave of home four hours ahead of what he had planned.
Returning had been no better though, as Kurt was met at his door by the teen who had been oh so kind when giving him 'advice' after his audition. He was just standing there at his door with a hand full of flowers looking at his feet before he heard to tell-tale clack of Kurt's shoes on the marble floors. Kurt sighed in disgust as he witnessed the kicked puppy-dog eyes on the handsome face before him. He stopped in front the other only because his door was blocked by the muscular body only partially hidden by the Dalton uniform (and who wears those on the weekends?!).
"Can I help you?" Kurt was too tired at this point to sound like his usual Ice Queen self or put up his Queen Bitch face. He really just wanted this over with so that he could just get on with his life. He was at a pretty low point at the moment and he was afraid that any more blows to his self-esteem or his person in general would happily knock him over the edge.
"I'msorry," was the rushed reply "I'm sorry," he said again slower. Kurt merely raised an eyebrow at the dapper teen.
"I should not have said that to you. I haven't had any real competition before and I was jealous and afraid of you. That does not excuse my actions though. I really am sorry." The boy held out the hand with flowers and Kurt found himself lost in the sincerity reflected in those gorgeous golden eyes. He took the flowers and nodded his acceptance before offering his free hand to the slightly shorter male.
"My name is Kurt Hummel," he introduced himself. The other teen took the offered hand before introducing himself as well.
"Blaine Anderson." The two boys smiled at each other in understanding before Blaine escorted Kurt to the Warblers council room.
After their initial turbulent meeting, Kurt and Blaine became fast friends as well as duet partners as it soon became apparent that Kurt's range meant a Pandora's Box worth of song choices had been opened up to the Warblers. It had been surprising and a bit emotional for Kurt to see and feel how appreciated his talent was, where it was showcased rather than hidden due to its uniqueness in today's society. After all, countertenors are rare in males after the age of puberty and the glee club at Dalton recognized the gem that they had accepted into their midst. Of it all, Kurt would have to say that the best thing about the private institution so far, was having met Blaine. Not only was the younger Warbler good-looking, smart and funny, he was also gay and Kurt was totally crushing on him. Their flirty interactions were the highlight of Kurt's life so far, let alone his day. It had Kurt floating on cloud nine for weeks before it came crashing down in a burning pile of ash.
What Kurt had thought was flirting between two gay teens, was merely Blaine being friendly and himself failing at communicating his interest in Blaine to other teen. He was embarrassed when he had found out that his advice before they left for the mall had not been Blaine's roundabout way of asking him out, but in asking out another guy who worked at the Gap, Jeremiah. Kurt had become a back-up singer for Blaine's attempt to ask out an older man that had absolutely nothing in common with Kurt. Then the shorter teen had had bluntly stated later on that the effeminate teen was "about as sexy as a baby penguin," which for Kurt was just yet another harsh blow to his already trampled self-esteem. The final blow was at the party at Rachel's that Kurt had let Blaine talk them into attending.
Kurt had not wanted to attend, but getting it from both his dad and Blaine about mending broken bridges and forgiveness and so on, Kurt had given in (mostly due to the fact that he was still head over heels for the other gay teen). However, at that party, the final nail in Kurt's coffin was Blaine's enthusiastic make-out session with Rachel and the next day, his defense of their budding relationship. Kurt could admit that most of his words had stemmed from his hurt, but he had just wanted the other boy to look at him, to see that he was right there, that he was available and that he liked the stockier teen. Blaine had made it abundantly clear before he left in true diva style, that Kurt was not even a blimp on his radar. It hurt more than he had thought possible that Rachel was more attractive to Blaine than he. He just could not understand what he lacked that everyone else seemed to have.
Kurt had avoided the younger teen for the rest of the week as he came to terms with the fact even on an objective scale by his best friend, he was undesirable to even those of his same sexual orientation. It was a devastating blow to recover from and he also needed time to make sure that he could stop looking at Blaine again as anything more than a friend because he valued the relationship they did have too much to throw it away due to his overzealous imagination creating fantastical signs of possible relationships. It was this same exaggerated thinking that had landed him in 'The Incident' with Finn. That was when Kurt Hummel decided to just give up on that aspect of his life. He would never like women, but here in Lima he apparently would never attract men either and now, he was okay with that. He made himself okay with that because when he hit the streets of New York, a whole new world would be offered for him to explore. He could wait until then.
Rather than dwelling on yet another failure and disappointment in his short life, Kurt used what he was feeling to power his performances and it worked beyond his wildest imagining. At sectionals, Kurt's solo at the end of the set had led Dalton Academy to a unanimous victory over the other choirs. What made it even more surprising was the fact that he sang Disney's 'Reflection,' which had not been the song that he was supposed to have performed. For the Warblers, the win more than made up for the breach of etiquette that had occurred. However, it was regionals that gave Kurt pause because they were going against New Directions which meant that he would come face to face with Finn once more as he had not done since that disastrous weekend not so long ago.
When they arrived at McKinley High for regionals, Kurt thought for sure that he was going to lose everything he had eaten for breakfast. He had not realized just how much the attack had affected him until their limo pulled into the drop-off zone in front of the auditorium. His left knee was always going to give him issues without his brace during physical activity, but at least he could still dance. It was the part that ached most fiercely at the moment and it was only Blaine's comforting touch and the other Warblers encircling him like the secret service surrounds the President that allowed him to push through his fear and keep going. Rather than exploring as they normally would, the Warblers remained tight-knit in the wings of the stage until it came time for them to perform. On the up side, they were able to watch all of the other performances in order to see what kind of competition they had, especially their biggest competitors, the New Directions.
Kurt noticed that they had not changed a single thing. Rachel and Finn were the star duet of the show, followed by Rachel's ballad solo, and a group number that still heavily featured just Rachel and Finn's voices with Mercedes holding out the final note at the end for that 'diverse' feeling. For the Warblers, they had seen better at sectionals and were not worried in the slightest about beating out ND in their own house. For Kurt, it felt like vindication for all the crap he had gotten from the club for being too different, even amongst the outcasts that were glee club at McKinley. Once the others had finally cleared the stage, Kurt prepared to step into the light with the rest of the Warblers to show New Directions what show choir was really about.
Their first number was a group number that featured their bass, Andrew and the two tenors, Nick and Jeff. Next was Kurt and Blaine's duet that was traditionally sung by a male and a female, but they rearranged some of the song and substituted a verse in order to have it more appropriate for the two boys on stage. Though Kurt still sang the traditionally female arranged parts of the song. When it came to the solo, Kurt was the one to sing this time and had decided to do a controversial piece that summarized his feelings on New Directions. He had even made a costume for the song, with the permission and approval of the Warbler council this time: Le jazz hot. It showcased his entire range as well as exemplifying his dichotomous nature. Unknowingly, it also had William Schuester looking at him in a new light because he had never before taken the time to explore Kurt's full range, nor had he ever wanted to. He had to admit he had been prone to thinking of Kurt in terms of his school 'image.'
Now that he was exposed to it however, he was kicking himself for being so stupid because it was clear that Kurt had talent and his voice had completely captivated both the audience and the judges. He voice was a thrall as he vibrated from high to low notes with an ease that should not be possible for anyone of either sex. He could not even be disappointed when his club came in second to the Warblers as he was too focused on the praise that the judges had given the group. They had called Kurt a countertenor and had commended the Warblers for their exceptional thought and use of him during their performance.
Thus, the Dalton Academy Warblers had qualified for nationals which was held in Los Angeles and to no one's surprise at Dalton Academy, the Warblers won their first national show choir competition in almost a decade.
Sadly, as the year came to a close, Kurt had to say goodbye to Dalton for good due to the fact that his father did not have the wherewithal to pay for another year (or even another semester) at the school even with all of the scholarships that Kurt had qualified for. The silver lining is that one of his most aggressive bullies had moved away due a job opportunity for their father in another state. Kurt would no longer have to fear for his life because David Karofsky was no longer there come through on his threat despite the fact that Kurt would have never told in any case. Thus, Kurt Hummel was returning to the ignominious halls of William McKinley High School once more.
For summer, Kurt began to look for a second job. Despite their attempts to close the rift between Kurt and the rest of the family (note: Finn), Kurt remained steadfast in having nothing to do with the attempts. Since his return from Dalton, Kurt had refused to eat, watch TV or even exist in the same room as his stepbrother. He refused to work the same shifts as Finn at the garage which had been a scheduling nightmare, but Kurt was in charge of that anyway so the hassle was worth it. However, since Kurt only worked part time at the garage and had already extended his hours to the max, he needed something to do in his considerable off time to keep him away from Finn (and therefore, home since Finn was always there). Any time left after his two jobs saw Kurt spending locked inside his basement or driving to Westerville in order to hang out with his friends from Dalton, most notably Blaine.
Burt was worried about Kurt's avoidance of home and their family and that the young one was going to work himself into an early grave at the rate he was going. No matter what the eldest Hummel tried to do to figure out a way to bridge the gap, Kurt was resistant. He was never belligerent about it or disrespectful, but he was unmoving on the subject. He wanted nothing to do with his stepbrother and he made it clear that Burt himself was treading dangerously thin ice without having ever said a word about the issue. It hurt to see his son so unhappy, so miserable and so uncomfortable in his own home and it was weighing heavily on the man's broad shoulders.
Kurt was honestly doing everything that he possibly could in order to avoid Finn due to his indirect participation in Kurt's pain. He also did not want to give the jock anymore fuel to add to the fire, especially now that he was dating Rachel again. So, the less time he spent around the other teen meant he spent less time worrying or with his flashbacks and nightmares about the beating he had taken. As much as the taller teen refuted against it, he was of the same make and model as the Neanderthals that had beaten Kurt. He was just too dimwitted to act on his impulses. This sadly had the downside of his father trying harder to push the two together for the purposes of a reconciliation which Kurt was never going to participate in unless Finn came to him as a result of his sincere remorse. It was this situation that was making it so hard for the gay teen to continue spending significant amounts of time with his father.
He still loved the man, wanted to spend time with him, but Kurt was realizing just how far apart he and his father truly were now that Burt's 'ideal son' had appeared in the form of Finn. He was incredibly jealous, but at the same time he was glad that his dad had found the son he had obviously hoped Kurt would be, a son that would not bring the heavy burdens that Kurt bore because of his sexuality and unique personality. Even though his revelation had the side effect of distancing himself even further from his father, emotionally, Kurt felt that it was for the best. And so, Kurt continued to work two jobs and travel tens of hours a week in order to visit with his friends in Westerville, Santana, Brittany and surprisingly with Puck on occasion too while staying out of Finn and his dad's way. Just a little bit longer, and he could leave this nightmare behind for the beginning of a new dream.
A/N: Hey guys! Sorry about the late update, but I will not abandon this story. However, it has taken on a mind of its own and I have severely deviated from outline of what this story was supposed to be like. I hope this chapter was worth the wait and please let me know what you think! Your reviews keep me focused and motivated to do my best even if I am not always on time with my updates. I hope to have the next chapter up next week and no late than two.
Cheers!
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