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Did you ever write something and thought afterwards 'damn, I planed that totally different' ? Well, that's what happened in this chapter, it was supposed to be more fun..but well...then this happened:

I'm just more chapter 6

Half an hour passed without a spoken word, but it wasn't uncomfortable. Blaine looked out the window and glanced occasionally to Kurt. He still had his head on the head rest and his eyes were closed. His breathing was even and Blaine wondered if he was actually sleeping. He looked much better than when he arrived, almost peaceful. It hadn't escaped Blaine's notice that Kurt hadn't locked the doors again once he got in the car. That meant he felt safer with him, right? Safe enough to even sleep.

Blaine smiled happily.

Yes, definitely the right thing to do. He suppressed a yawn, not willing to sleep himself in case Kurt woke up.

Kurt's hand were still resting on the steering wheel, tightening the grip around the leather when his eyes fluttered.

"No..no...don't. Lemme go..."

At first Blaine thought Kurt woke up, as his voice filled the car but his eyes remained closed. He must be dreaming, Blaine let his eyes wander over the boy's body once more. Kurt's whole body was stiff and Blaine stared deliberately at his white knuckles. Slowly he reached out towards them, not sure how Kurt would react. Checking that he was still asleep he closed the distance between their hands and gently but decisively loosened Kurt's firm grasp off the wheel. Feeling Kurt's soft skin Blaine sighed. So breakable. He lowered their hands and covered them with his other hand so that Kurt's was in between. Blaine nearly jumped as Kurt squeezed his hand tightly, clinging to it as if his life depended on it.

"Help me! NO...don't...", Kurt nearly screamed and Blaine reached for his face, trying to turn Kurt's face towards him.

"Kurt. Kurt. Wake up, Kurt. Listen, wake up! You're dreaming. KURT!"

Kurt's eyes shot open, looking frightened, his eyes on Blaine, whose hand still lingered on his chin.

"You...you were dreaming...", Blaine looked down, a faint blush coloring his cheeks as he removed his hand from Kurt's face. "I thought I better wake you up...you were...talking."

He kept his head low but glanced at Kurt, who was frowning a little when he realized he was holding Blaine's hand. He loosened his grip, but didn't let go entirely.

Letting out a sigh he relaxed back into his seat.

"Thank you. For...being here. Being here with me." he looked at Blaine through his long eyelashes.

"Hey, come on. We tried it. Don't hang your head."

They were sitting at the Lima Bean, sipping coffee and, yes, skipping even more classes. But they couldn't care less.

They confronted Karofsky about the kiss after Kurt filled him in on the whole story.

Blaine had this whole perfect 'You're Not Alone' speech prepared but they didn't even get this far. Being pushed into bars wasn't exactly what he hoped for, so he had better shut up and let Karofsky stump away. However, here they were - sitting at the Lima Bean drinking coffee on a non-date as Blaine kept reminding himself.

Kurt drew his fingers absentmindedly over the table and looked totally disappointed.

"He isn't going to come out, that's for sure, but maybe he'll stop bullying you." Blaine said encouragingly.

Kurt pursed his lips, thinking about something. When he finally locked eyes with Blaine he said: "Is it weird if I feel sorry for him? No, let me explain." He raised his index finger in front of Blaine's face who wanted to interrupt him. Blaine tilted his head slightly, looking questioningly at Kurt like a puppy.

"I..well. He bullied me, well he still does, and last but not least threatened to kill me but I know exactly what he must feel like. Seeing me everyday walking the halls of McKinley being just myself. Being okay with who I am, even if others don't approve. It's not like I rub it into everyone's faces that I'm gay, but it's kinda obvious. I'm okay with who I am, and I won't let others get me down because of it. Not anymore. Now look at him. He's afraid. Afraid of what his friends might think of him. And who knows what his father is like? It's no reason to bully someone, but I can see his point. Everyone deals differently with this kind of thing, and he is helpless and searching for a way to get rid of his emotions. And why not bully the only openly gay kid at school, and why not kill two birds with one stone in the process? Cover himself and have an outlet for all the anger at himself..."

Kurt's eyes darted between his coffee cup and his hands, and anywhere else but Blaine's face. Blaine could see tears lingering in his eyes as he held his head high, staring at the ceiling. Blaine shifted in his seat, totally aware that they were in public. Talking about being gay. In Ohio.

He wanted to take Kurt's hand again, wanted to soothe him, to tell him that everything would be okay. But he couldn't. He shouldn't.

This kid's gone through enough.

Suddenly he wished he had taken him somewhere more private.

"I understand him, but I hate him. I hate him for making my life a living hell, I hate him for making me go through this. And yes. I'm afraid, Blaine, afraid of what he might do to me. I can't sleep at night knowing that he'll be there the next day, just waiting for an opportunity to hurt me. It's not all about the physical pain, because that goes away, it heals, ...but the psychological pain, Blaine. The thoughts that won't leave you alone, that'll stay with you wherever you go. What if someone finds out about him? What if something triggers him to be even more angry at me?

"It's like having the sword of Damocles hanging over my head. Everytime it could be enough pressure and it will fall. And I'll be the one getting hit. "

Kurt tried to wipe away his tears but they kept coming. It nearly broke Blaine's heart to see him like this. Again.

"I'm sorry,...I'm...bathroom..." Kurt jumped off his chair, nearly knocking over his coffee cup, and hurried away.

Unsure what to do Blaine looked around, meeting the eyes of some other costumers. Some looked sad, other disgusted.

A girl not far away from where they were sitting nodded her head vaguely in the direction of the bathroom and mouthed something, which looked a lot like "Go."

It was all it took him to get on his feet.

He slowly opened the bathroom door and stuck his head through the gap.

"Kurt?", he asked gently.

"In here.", a hint of a voice coming from the stalls.

Blaine walked through the door, searching until he found Kurt, standing in the very last corner possible. Eyes red and puffy he looked at Blaine, his whole body shaking. He turned away and tried to get his shaking under control but his knees kept moving uncontrollable.

If someone would have asked Blaine how it was possible to react that fast he wouldn't be able to answer. The moment he saw Kurt falling he held him in his arms, one hand moving in a soothing pattern across his back.

"Woah, gotcha!", he had no idea what he was doing. " Kurt...listen. I dunno what will be tomorrow, or the next week, but I do know that things are gonna get better. I..gosh..I wish I could help you, but I can't. Not as long as you are going to this school. I can be here for you, whenever you need someone to talk, but I can't make Karofsky to leave you alone, I...I...wished I could do more."

Kurt was sobbing now, forehead resting on Blaine's shoulder. Blaine took Kurt's shoulder, pushing slightly to get him to look into his eyes.

"It. Will. Get. Better.", he said, laying as much conviction as possible in every single word.

Kurt smiled faintly and looked down at the space, well, there wasn't much, between them.

Blaine let go of him, suddenly aware that this might be a little bit inappropriate, they'd only known each other for so long.

He cleared his throat. "Well, okay, then, let's get you cleaned up."

He turned around and headed towards the sink.

"Thank you." A whisper caught his ears.

Once Kurt finished freshening up they left the coffee shop and climbed back into Kurt's car.

The whole way until they reached the school parking lot no word was spoken, both boys lost in their own thoughts, again. His speech to Kurt woke something up in Blaine, and the truth of his words hit him and left him breathless-

It. Will. Get. Better.

-because that was exactly what was going to happen. Blaine got bullied himself, he went through the pain and the sleepless nights, and it didn't stop until he woke up in a hospital, nearly beaten to death. But it did get better. He found Dalton, he found people that didn't care what he was. He had maybe lost his dad along the way, but he got so much more. Friends. A safe place to be the person he was born to be. And now Kurt.

I should be happy.

Next chapters are gonna be happier for the boys ;) (well, um,..I'll try :D )

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