Halo: The Moron Chronicles
Chapter 4, wait it is chapter 4, right? Anyway, maybe chapter 4: The silent Photographer
I only got one review, well two but they came from the same person. REVIEW GOD DAMN IT!
Three pelicans fly over Halo's ocean, which kind of freaks me out cause' you can't drown in it…
Pelican Pilot 1-All right, we're going to land where all of those Covenant are!
MC-Fucking why?
Pelican Pilot 1-Uh, I don't know!
ZB-Couldn't we just land in front of the building that we're suppose to go to?
Pelican Pilot 2-No! That'd ruin the coolness!
DOP-You mean the retardedness?
Pelican Pilot 3-(Begins crying) Why do you say stuff that you know will hurt us!
The pelicans all land on the beach that is covered with hundreds of Covenant.
MC, DOP, ZOO, ZB-(Jump out of Pelican and take cover)
ZOO-Hey, ZB, those hunters stole your turtle.
ZB-POE! NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! (Runs out like a madman and attacks Covenant)
(By the way I DO have a turtle and his name is Poe…)
DOP-Wait, isn't his turtle on Earth?
ZOO-Yeah but he doesn't know that.
DOP, MC-Ooooohhhhh….
An hour or so passes and MC, DOP, and ZOO are all playing cards.
ZOO-Go fish!
MC-We're playing poker, dumbass.
DOP-I uh, got five aces! Yeah…. Five aces.
MC-There are only four aces in a deck!
DOP-Well I have five!
ZB comes back, covered in blood and holding a turtle.
ZB-I have one! Poe has been saved!
ZOO, DOP-(Look at each other)
DOP-They really had a turtle?
ZOO-And that turtle is Poe?
ZB-YES! Can't you see?
DOP-(Shakes head and looks at MC) Am I going insane?
MC-(Shakes head) No… I see it too…
An hour or so passes and the group has made it through the first facility, now they are backtracking through the second, trying to get out.
MC-Damn it, we've passed that grunt's body! We're lost!
ZOO-No, no we haven't! We haven't passed that marine's body!
ZB-Actually, I just killed him… we are lost.
DOP-NO! I'LL NEVER SEE MR. SNUGGLES AGAIN!
ZOO-(Looks at ZB) Who's Mr. Snuggles?
ZB-His teddy bear…
MC-Look! The room that leads out!
The four instantly make a mad dash fro the room but are stopped by two invisible elites.
Invisible Elite 1-Hault! Who goes there?
MC-Er…
Invisible Elite 2-You must answer a riddle to pass!
DOP-(Turns to ZOO) Why don't they just try to kill us?
ZOO-(Shrugs)
MC-Uh, what is the riddle?
Invisible Elite1-What came first, the Jackal or the egg?
ZB-MY GRENADE! (Throws grenade at elites)
The two Elites are blown to pieces and MC, DOP, and ZOO all look at ZB.
ZB-What? That was easier!
DOP-He's got a point… NOW LET'S KEEP RUNNING!
The four run through the room and out of the corridor leading outside, surprisingly, no one is there to pick them up. Instead the Arbiter is standing on the platform, taking pictures of the beach.
Arbiter-(Sniffs) It's so beautiful I could cry!
MC-Uh… who are you?
Arbiter-(Turns to MC) Why, I'm insert arbiter's name here
ZOO-Well what are you doing?
Arbiter-Taking pictures of the beach, it reminds me of my dead dog… (Sniffs) Poor Mr. Waffles… (Hugs MC and begins to cry) OH MR. WAFFLES! WHY DID YOU GO!
MC-Uh…. It's ok?
Another hour or so passes before the four get a ride with the Arbiter to the new Marine base, for some Reason the Arbiter doesn't think to attack the base….
There it is! Longer then most of the chapters, more random, and funnier!
Please review guys, it's hard to keep going with out support.