AN: The song for this chapter is "Do I Wanna Know?" by Arctic Monkeys. Listen while you read!

Chapter 5: Do I Wanna Know?

Jake touched the bridge of his nose with a cautious finger. Upon contact he winced. His poor schnoz had certainly taken a beating last night, but his act of bravery went unrewarded. Even with his big romantic gesture, Jake still didn't get the girl. He can't say he regretted it though. There were much more painful things he would endure if it meant Amy was safe.

Jake groaned.

"How am I this whipped?" he thought as he winced again, but this time the pain had nothing to do with his nose. Jake lied flat on his dorm bed with the covers half covering him and striped sunlight gently creeping in from the blinds as he plucked up the energy to sit up. He failed for the first few minutes, but he managed eventually. He dreaded going to the mirror and seeing the terrible mess that he would undoubtedly find on his face. He wiped his eyes and his hand accidently bumped into his nose.

"Ahh!" he exclaimed and his fear of his image in the mirror grew. He sighed and stood up from his bead. He stumbled his way into the bathroom and deliberately looked down as he entered. He stared at the sink from moments or minutes before finally taking in a deep breath and raising his head to meet his own eyes.

Jake groaned again. It was bad. Real bad. With the exception of his nostrils and the tip, his entire nose was covered in angry, purpley-black splotches. Jake always knew his nose wasn't the most petite around, but he certainly couldn't deny its size now. It was as if his face was a feature of his nose, instead of the other way around. He was a nose.

"Damn it" Jake mumbled under his breath. What was he going to do about this? Put a bandage on it? And what? Make his nose even bigger? Should he get make-up? Putting it on would be torture and where the hell would he get some?

Or maybe he was thinking about this all wrong. In a certain light it actually looked kind of badass. If people asked about it he could manipulate the truth to make it sound cooler than it was.

"Oh, this guy was going to hurt a lady friend of mine and I had to, y'know, step in. I only did what anyone would do" certainly sounded better than "I was in a pit and this guy wearing military-grade boots hit me right in the honker after I moved my friend (who is most definitely my Soulmate, but doesn't believe I am her Soulmate) from danger, but even after all that she's still sticking with the guy who is definitely not her Soulmate"

Yeah, version one is way cooler.

Jake decided to leave his nose as is and if any one asked about it he would keep it vague. As he brushed his teeth and got ready for work, Jake's mind began remembering the night before. The glances full of meaning, the almost kiss, and then, the worst part, Amy's verbal declaration of devotion to her lover seeped into Jake's mind like oil spilling into an ocean. His body felt heavy and a strong desire to crawl back into bed overcame him. The last thing he wanted to do was go to work to see the girl who had rejected him so fully. What would they say to each other? How should they continue on?

Jake didn't have the answer. He shook his head and tried to think of anything else, but failed miserably.

Seeing Amy at work was just as painful as expected, if not worse. Amy could barely look at him and Jake felt slicing sensations in his chest whenever she was near. They only talked when needed and each word was so saccharinely polite that Jake worried his teeth would rot.

To top it all, customers kept staring at his nose, which made him want to punch somebody. Jake was having a bad enough day with the awkward tension between him and Amy, he didn't need disapproving looks from strangers in addition. He tried not to be so aware of her, but that was impossible. Amy was like a beacon of light: impossible to ignore. There was also something up with her energy. She was different. She constantly looked down, but Jake noticed her eyes had bags and were bloodshot. Jake wondered if she'd been crying all night.

"Why? She wasn't the one who was rejected" Jake thought, but it only made him worry. Was she upset for hurting him? If that were the case, he felt horribly guilty. He never wanted to hurt her. Or was it something else? If so, it sucked not being able to comfort her. He resigned himself to silence, however, as it wasn't his place to comfort her. It was Teddy's.

Over the next week they carried on in their cordial-but-distanced relationship, never getting in a more personal conversation than "How are you?" and "Good". Savage Vinyl felt a lot colder suddenly, and not just because it was winter in Brooklyn. Jake was getting increasingly worried about Amy as the days went on. Something was up with her and he had a hunch it had more to do than just their little interaction. He had never seen her so down.

"Maybe I should just ask her?" he thought, but the prospect of that made his stomach drop. The prospect of interacting with Amy at all made his chest tighten and his head get foggy. It was like preparing yourself to be tortured. He'd either be reminded how wonderful she was and/or that she didn't want him. All leading to excruciating emotional pain.

"But I can't do nothing" he thought as he began filing records in "rock" section. Just as he was despairing at what to do, Jake looked at the next record in his hand. It was black with nothing but one white wavelength traversing across it.

"That's right…" he thought, remembering he had used a song from this album on Amy's third mix. He had finished that mix before the other two. He wanted to save the best for last, but it never seemed appropriate to give it to her, though he did keep it stashed away in his backpack. Maybe he could just give it to her as a way of saying sorry? An olive branch of sorts.

On his lunch break, Jake found his mix and a perforated note book jammed in the bottom of his backpack to write a note on. He grabbed a pen that lay abandoned on the rickety break room table and began to scrawl a letter to Amy. He got as far as "Hey Amy," before getting stumped. What did he say? He didn't want to seem like he was still hung up on her (which he was), but he also didn't want to sound cold. It took a couple of rewrites, but he figured something out that seemed balanced enough:

"Hey Amy,

I noticed you seemed kinda down lately. Hope you're okay. I realized I never gave you your last mix, which, don't forget, is meant to get you hot and bothered, and who can be down when they're hot and bothered, AMIRIGHT? So yeah, let's call off the bet. I don't want you to have to go without your NPR podcasts for a whole month (which you would have). Truce! Hopefully, through this wonderful musical adventure, you have seen the light and will be jammin' to tunes in your car more often.

Tell me what you think!

Jake"

Jake fished out the track list from his pocket and slid it in the cd case. He looked at the mix:

Young God – Halsey

Do I Wanna Know? – Arctic Monkeys

Toes – Glass Animals

To Be Alone – Hozier

Often – The Weeknd

Toxic – Yael Naim

Ball and Biscuit – The White Stripes

Sex on Fire – Kings of Leon

Criminal – Fiona Apple (watch music vid for EXTRA sexy)

Off to the Races – Lana Del Rey

Addicted to Love – Florence + the Machine

You're the One That I Want – Lo-Fang

Bad Intentions – Niykee Heaton

Yup. That was a good mix. Jake smiled. He wished he could share this mix with her in a different way. This mix wasn't meant to be shoved in a locker like a smelly gym shirt. It was meant to be listened to as two people slowly peeled their clothes off and let them drop to the floor. This thought brought on a whole onslaught of uninvited thoughts to Jake's mind:

He saw himself playing the mix and breathing heavy as a scantily-clad Amy looked at him with "come here" eyes. He watched himself walk slowly to her, his blood pumping in his ears nearly canceling out the music with its intensity. As he got closer, he watched Amy's breath hitch in anticipation and he stopped breathing as well. When they were separated by only the thinnest slice of air, Jake outreached a hand to her neck to just lightly graze his finger tips along it. The motion gave Amy goose bumps and the goose bumps made Jake's stomach drop. His palm landed on her cheek with his thumb on her jaw as his lips steadily got closer to hers. His eyes slowly closed and his chest filled with a liquid warmth that radiated out from his body. He felt Amy's breathe on his lips and her body heat getting closer and closer. He could hear her heartbeat as he-

"Jake!" said a voice that violently shook him out of his daydream.

"Wha-?" he said, disoriented.

"Your break's been over for five minutes. Get back on the floor. Now" Rosa said with eyes like knives. Jake snapped up with the CD.

"Sorry! Just got to put this away! Be out there in a sec!" Jake said in a panicky voice. He rushed to the lockers and placed the CD and note in Amy's locker.

After his little daydream, Jake had a hard time working. He couldn't keep his head straight as snapshots of the vision kept popping up in his mind. Each picture would send his heart rate skyrocketing and organizing cassette tapes became impossible. Still, he did his best. When Amy would come into his mind he thought of the least-sexy thing he could: dead puppies, grandmas, broccoli, and so on. This method worked fairly well and he continued his work.

As the day dragged on, the winds outside began picking up. They got so loud that it sounded like chorus of moans reaching over from the afterlife. It sounded like it had begun to rain as well. Jake briefly mused that it may snow after sunset. He finally finished stocking the store when Rosa called him over to the front desk. He obeyed and stood next to Amy behind the counter, his pulse racing from just being near her.

Rosa faced them from the opposite side of the desk. She was putting on her coat even though the store was open for another three hours.

"Where you off to?" Jake asked.

"None of your business, Peralta. Look, I've got plans tonight so I need you two to close up," she said throwing Amy the keys, "Where are you on stocking?"

"Just finished" Jake said.

"Good. Then all you need to do is watch the counter. Call me if there's a problem. Don't screw up" Rosa said right before she braved the storm brewing outside.

A powerful gust of wind rattled the glass and black metal doors that was entrance to the store. Jake and Amy silently watched the doors as Jake began to realize that they were all alone. They hadn't had a customer in at least thirty minutes. No one wanted to go to a record store with the weather like this, but Rosa would never close her store early for something as wussy as a storm and the end product was Jake and Amy alone. Together.

Jake felt himself break out into a sweat. Being alone with Amy was bad news. He was still so hurt from her rejection, but he couldn't shake the cosmic attraction he felt towards her. He couldn't stop wanting her. Every time he looked at her he swore he saw white light emanating from her and he wanted to bathe in that light. He cursed himself and the world. How could he have such feelings if they were for naught? They felt prophetic, destined, fateful, but still, Amy was only to be a friend.

She said she was in love with Teddy, not him, so he needed to leave her alone. He needed to destroy his feelings and move on. He didn't have much hope that he could, however.

"Hey, Jake?" Amy asked.

"Hm?"

"Thanks for the mix," she paused, "…and the note"

"Oh yeah, I didn't want to give up on your musical education"

"Thanks for looking out" she said with a smile.

"Anytime. What'd you think of the sad mix?" he asked.

"Total bummer"

"Told ya" he said with a small smile that Amy reciprocated. For one quiet moment they looked at each other, both trying to understand something, but Jake broke it off before he could get the answer to a question he never asked.

Though all their side work was done, Jake and Amy kept themselves busy away from each other. Jake had decided to take inventory of everything on the floor when the lights went out. Jake let out a shriek.

"Jake?!" Amy shouted from across the store.

"What happened?" Jake asked as a little blue light erupted from the corner. It approached him and he realized it was Amy and her iPhone.

"The power went out" she said.

"We should call Rosa" Jake said. Amy nodded. She began searching her phone for Rosa's contact when Jake and Amy's both made loud, terrible noises.

Jake pulled out his phone and read the message across his screen:

EMERGENCY ALERT: Blizzard warning. Rolling blackouts. Winds at 35 MPH. Conditions worsen. Do NOT travel.

"Crap, is it that bad?" Jake asked.

"I was worried about this" Amy said. She started towards the glass doors and looked out. Jake followed her.

Outside was far worse than he realized. The wind pounded against the door like a criminal trying to get out of his jail cell. Snow came down in such quantities that Jake could barely see five feet past the door. The door itself had at least two feet of snow against the paned glass. Jake usually walked to work, but he didn't dare go out in that. They were trapped.

"Crap" Amy said, biting on a thumb nail.

"What should we do?" Jake asked. Amy looked at him, the gears in her head turning as she came up with a plan.

"Call Rosa. Let her know what's happening and convince her not to get us. She's stubborn enough to think she'll be fine driving us home in a storm like this. Then, find some candles, blankets, and food if we can. We might be here all night" Amy reasoned and Jake felt his mouth go dry.

"All night?" he asked and immediately understood how dangerous that was. Alone in a candlelight store, getting cozy with Amy Santiago? He could think of nothing more destructive.

"Yeah, it's not safe out there. Ugh! When will people realize we need to reduce carbon emissions so that freak storms like this stop happening!" Amy exclaimed as she furiously searched for Rosa's number.

"NPR podcast?" Jake asked.

"No. StarTalk with Neil Degrasse Tyson. Bill Nye the Science Guy frequently guest stars to talk about climate change" Amy said with a triumphant smirk.

"Neat" Jake said sarcastically, though still smiling that particular smile he reserved for teasing Amy.

"Can you start collecting rations?" Amy asked as she put the phone to her ear. Jake nodded and headed to the back. A tickling nervousness grew in his chest. Being alone with Amy filled Jake with dread, but also excitement. He knew nothing could happen between them, but this situation felt like some opportunity to be reckless.

Jake took a big breath and exhaled. He needed to stop thoughts like that. Amy had made her feelings very clear and he needed to respect them.

"You can't give up!" a part of him said. That was the problem. He still held onto hope. How could he not when his head was filled with easy ways of kissing her and his dreams further mocked him with their past life together. She was everything to him, but in a turn of events contradictory to the narrative he had been told all his life, she didn't reciprocate his devotion.

It was agonizing. Every day was agonizing. He worried his organs would tear themselves in two if he wasn't with her. His every atom reached out in her direction when she was near. How did she not sense it too?

Jake pushed passed his growing sense of despair and scavenged Rosa's office for supplies. He found three scented candles on Rosa's desk that included "Sandalwood", "Vanilla", and "Jasmine". He peeked in Rosa's small, personal fridge and found four water bottles, carrots, ranch dressing, and a bag of grapes. Not exactly a feast, but they'd make it through the night.

He continued searching through Rosa's office, but found nothing like a blanket. He checked the storage room and the break room, but still came up empty. He placed his bounty on the break room table and realized he didn't have a lighter for the candles. He was about to go on another search when Amy bounced in with her blue-ish ghost light.

"What'd you find?" she asked, facing her light on the table.

"Candles, carrots, ranch, and grapes. Can't find a blanket anywhere and I don't have a lighter" he said.

"I got one" she said, pulling a cheap, red Bic lighter out of her jean pocket. She flicked it like an old pro and lighted each candle. The air began to fill with a pleasant scent that made Jake's muscles relax and his skin more aware of the warm body beside him.

The warm glow of the candles lit Amy's skin like a golden temple in the sun. She looked down at the candles and Jake watched her breathe, watched her long lashes lay gently on her cheeks. She was radiant and and all she had to do was be.

Sinking, tearing, falling sensations filled him. It would be so easy to reach out and touch her. It would be like drinking after days without water or sleep after hours of wakefulness: the cure to his ailments.

"Now what?" she asked, looking around the small break room.

"Chill, I guess" Jake said as he sat on the dusty sofa on the north side of the room. Amy let out a small "hm" and began looking around the break room. She checked in cupboards and under furniture, inspecting items as she went along.

"What are you looking for?" Jake asked.

"Entertainment" she said.

"You're not great with this whole 'chill' thing, are you?"

"Not really. Hey, look!" Amy said as she pulled a CD player from a box in the corner.

"What?"

"It's a CD player! I think it runs on batteries" Amy said as she fiddled with it. Indeed, after a moment, fuzzy radio sounds began erupting from the player.

"Oh, cool, it works. Want to see if we have any "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" audio books?" Jake asked, teasing her. Amy rolled her eyes.

"No! Well, I was thinking…Your mix is in my locker" Amy said, her face flushing slightly.

"Oh, right" Jake said and began to feel nervous.

"We could listen to that. I've been wanting to listen to it all day" she confessed, looking even more flushed than before.

"Oh, uh, yeah we could, uh, listen to that" Jake said as his palms began to tremble ever so slightly.

"I'll go get it" Amy said. She whisked out of the room and Jake immediately stood up from the couch. He began pacing and playing with his hands.

"Calm down, Jake. Calm Down! You're reading too much into this. She isn't making a pass at you. She isn't making a pass at you!" Jake thought with increasing panic. Could it be possible? Suggesting to listen to a mix meant to set a sexy mood sure didn't seem innocent. The thought made Jake's heart race.

Amy came back into the break room and Jake quickly turned to face her. Their eyes locked and Jake stopped breathing. They looked at each other long and hard until Amy moved to put the CD in the player. Her hands fumbled with the case and Jake wondered if she was nervous too.

"She's nervous? Why should she be nervous? WHAT IS THERE TO BE NERVOUS ABOUT?" Jake thought, pacing once again.

As the first song began to play, Amy stood up and looked over at Jake, a softness in her eyes.

"Do you want to sit down?" she asked.

"Uh, no. I'm good here. By the table. My old friend the table. Tableton, as I like to call him" Jake said and then broke into maniacal, panicked laughter.

"Oh, okay" Amy said as she leaned against the wall opposite of him.

Jake looked at her briefly and then looked down at the ground. What was she doing to him? He looked back up and she was innocently biting her lip.

"What is going on?!" he thought, still not believing the situation was real.

"Jake, are you okay?" she asked.

"A-yup! Super good. Very good. Better than good, I am 100% super great! Thanks for asking" Jake said and commanded himself to calm down. He took a deep breath in and steadied himself.

"Storm's kind of crazy, huh?" Amy asked and Jake knew it was another way for her to check in on him. It wasn't enough to be smart and beautiful, but she had to be kind too.

"Yeah, yeah it is. We're gonna be here a while, so I guess we should make the most of it" Jake said in an even tone that surprised him.

"How?" she asked and Jake swore she made her voice huskier. She was driving him insane.

"Talk. I guess"

"About what?" Amy asked.

"Well, uh, what's been going on with you? We haven't really been talking lately"

"Yeah, we haven't. Um, well I got an A on my Government paper" Amy said with a smile.

"Oh, awesome! I got a solid C on my Classic Lit paper so…"

"Jake"

"Yeah?"

"I, um, I also broke up with Teddy" Amy said and Jake saw fire in her eyes. The track changed and a slow, steady beat filled the tiny, candle-lit room.

/Have you got color in your cheeks'

Do you ever get the feeling that you can't shift the tide

That sticks around like something's in your teeth

And some aces up your sleeve/

"You what?" Jake asked in a quiet voice.

"He met his Soulmate. It wasn't me. You were right" Amy said, her voice low and earthy.

/Have you no idea that you're in deep

I dreamt about you nearly every night this week

How many secrets can you keep?

'Cause there's this tune I found that makes me think of you somehow

When I play it on repeat

Until I fall asleep

Spilling drinks on my settee/

Jake moved towards her. He didn't tell his feet to approach her, but they did on their own accord. She stayed still against the wall she leaned against, making no protests to Jake coming closer.

The song played on, it's smooth bass going at the same tempo as Jake's pulse. His vision blurred and the hairs on his skin raised as he got closer to Amy.

/So have you got the guts?

Been wondering if your heart's still open and

If so I wanna know what time it shuts

Amy looked up at him with big, brown eyes and a countenance void of doubt.

"Amy, what are you saying?" Jake asked.

"I'm saying…" she said as her hands slid slowly up from his tummy to his chest to finally landing on his collar…

Simmer down and pucker up

I'm sorry to interrupt it's just I'm constantly

On the cusp of trying to kiss you

I don't know if you feel the same as I do

But we could be together, if you wanted to/

"…That you should kiss me"

"Amy…" Jake said with his heart racing and blood pumping in his ears. He slowly moved closer to her, their noses centimeters apart. Jake placed his hands on each side of Amy's waist. She was warm underneath his fingertips. His grip tightened and he crushed his lips against hers.

Then, the world ended. Or it just started. Jake's atoms exploded inside him and then flew around the space connecting him and Amy. He felt like his body was tearing him apart in order to get closer to Amy's. The only logical thing to do was to kiss her even fiercer. As his entire being dissembled itself, Jake grabbed greedily at Amy and deepened the kiss.

Amy, just as hungry and collapsible as he, eagerly met him and clutched the hair on the the back of his neck. A moan that boarded on a purr escaped her.

Jake felt his skin dance between sensations of fire and ice. Pleasure and pain. But it didn't matter. Nothing mattered. Not any more. Only Amy. Amy. Amy Amy.

At some point Jake felt his molecules reassemble, but they were different. He was different. His cells weren't just his own anymore. They were half Jake and half Amy. She was in his bone marrow, his skin, his DNA. They were one.

They separated and Jake took in the sight of her. She looked different to him now. It was more than just the messy hair, the swollen lips, and the wild look in her eyes. It was her whole being. They were totally, completely, and fully bound now. She was more than herself. They stopped being "one", but were forever "we". Jake understood now.

"Oh, wow" Amy whispered and Jake couldn't help but laugh. She smiled and giggled with him.

"Amy" Jake said, looking into her eyes.

"Jake" she said, looking back.

He kissed her again and both tried desperately to get even closer to each other.

"Closer…" Jake thought and a light bulb went off in his head. He made a move to remove the long sleeve shirt Amy was wearing. A purr of satisfaction went off in his chest when she helped him and then went in for his belt.

/Crawling back to you, (do I wanna know?)

If this feeling flows both ways

(Sad to see you go)

Was sorta hoping that you'd stay

(Baby we both know)

That the nights were mainly made for saying

Things that you can't say tomorrow day/

He quickly took off his hoodie and separated from her for just a moment to take off his shirt. The moment was too long and they crashed back together like waves upon the shore. Amy's hands on his bare skin felt like fire and he prayed to be consumed by her flames.

They fumbled over to the old couch, bumping into the rickety table and other forgotten objects as they went. When they finally made it the place where they would have each other for the first time, they couldn't get each other's remaining clothes off fast enough.

The storm raged on, but no matter how terrible its winds, it could not match the power of the cataclysmic collision that happened inside Savage Vinyl that winter night.

AN: Yeah, yeah I took forever to update, but I think this chapter kind of makes up for it. ;)