Alex winced as a sharp pain shot up her leg into her hip. A sure sign she had been sitting for too long. She sighed in frustration, the injury a reminder of how she had almost let her grief take away everything. She had been surprised that Kara and Maggie had let her get away with not telling them exactly what had happened, but also knew that the reprieve wouldn't last long. Maggie had left for work nearly an hour ago, and Alex was still in her apartment looking at over-priced apartments. She had an appointment to see two apartments later that day.
She grabbed Oafs leash and a bottle of water, noticing that the dog was getting bored. He was used to being walked outside hourly due to Alex's injury plaguing her if she sat too long. Who knew having a dog could be such good exercise?
She ended up spending most of the day outside simply enjoying the beautiful weather. She found herself appreciating the small things much more now that she could see past what the Shrell had shown her. She knew that she had to live her life and only she could control her future.
By the time, she had shown up to Kara's apartment for their planned dinner she had already secured a decent apartment with a short lease until she had something more permanent and had lucked out that the tenants would be out in only a few days. She figured she would just take Maggie up on her offer to stay longer. It wasn't exactly a hardship spending time with the other woman.
This morning before Maggie had left they had shared a kiss at the door and Alex could still feel the press of Maggie's lips against her own and found herself smiling at random moments.
When she showed up to Kara's for dinner, the apartment door swung open as soon as she was in front of it, "Hey!" Kara said cheerfully. There was also a sense of underlying relief in Kara's tone and a stab of guilt rushed through Alex's body.
She pulled Kara toward her for a hug, "Hey. I'm starving, what are we going to eat?"
"Probably Pizza," Kara said with a smile. "Maggie is picking it up dinner on her way over and it's her favorite."
"So, are you and Maggie besties now or something?" Alex asked, teasing, but curious about the new bond.
Kara smiled slightly, "She really helped me through the whole thing. She was there through it all."
Alex grabbed Kara's hand, "I'm so sorry," she said softly, knowing it would never be enough for what she put Kara through.
Kara pulled her into another hug, "You know you're going to have to tell me about your leg, right?" Kara announced, predictably.
Alex couldn't help but smile, "After dinner I promise I will tell you," even though she wished she didn't have to relive it.
Kara nodded, "So Maggie told me you two might be giving a relationship a shot," Kara changed the subject.
Alex couldn't help the smile that came to her face. She nodded.
Kara's smile almost eclipsed Alex's as she practically bounced in her excitement, "That's so great."
"I thought a lot about life while I was gone," Alex admitted. "I kept trying to replace the images I had from the Shrell with what I really wanted in life and Maggie always seemed to be there," she couldn't help but smile.
Kara squealed and pulled Alex into an almost too tight hug, but Alex just held on as tight as she could. They were startled apart by a knock on the door, "It's your girlfriend," Kara giggled as she scanned through the door.
Alex rolled her eyes and lightly pushed Kara as she walked toward the door. As Alex approached the door she felt a slight thrill at the prospect of seeing Maggie. She felt slightly foolish, knowing she just saw her that morning, but when she pulled open the door and saw the megawatt smile that greeted her, she no longer felt foolish.
"Hey," Maggie said from behind a stack of 4 pizzas she held in her hand. "I brought dinner."
"Yeah dinner for 10," Alex laughed taking two of the pizzas.
"I'm hungry," Kara said from right behind Alex grabbing the pizzas out of her hands.
"I like left over pizza so I usually order too much and just munch on it for the next two days," Maggie explained with a shrug.
"Oh that's healthy," Alex said sarcastically and she took a bite from a large slice of pizza.
Maggie only raised an eyebrow in response.
They shared mostly small talk while they all gorged themselves on pizza, not straying to any too serious topics. Alex had missed this, just talking to someone. Her time away trying to heal had been hard and lonely. She was lost in thought until she realized the conversation had stopped. She met the worried gazes of the two other women, "I'm sorry. I was just lost in my head for a minute." She was relieved when the conversation started again with no questions.
Alex's luck ran out when all the mess from dinner was cleaned up and Kara and Maggie sat on either side of her looking at her meaningfully, "I guess it's time to start talking."
Kara simply nodded.
Alex took a deep breath and prepared herself to relive the hard first couple of months of her time away.
3 Weeks after leaving the DEO…
Alex was pleasantly numb from the copious amount of alcohol in her system. She was distantly aware that she had over done it this time, more drunk than she had been in a while. Still she decided to get into her car and drive. She was in bumfuck nowhere and figured she could make it back to her motel safe enough.
"The next thing I know I'm waking up in my car and its wrapped around a tree," Alex shivered as she remembered the pain and fear. She kept her eyes down, not willing to look up and see the judgement on the others faces. "I'm so lucky I didn't hit any other cars."
"Do you think you were trying to kill yourself by driving drunk like that?" Kara asked, her voice soft.
"Maybe subconsciously I was. I don't know. I don't think I was," Alex answered, frowning. She wished she knew the answer, but was even more afraid that she did know it. "I don't know what I was thinking, thankfully I had the presence of mind to buckle-up. I also lucked out with my injury."
"How is being barely able to walk and in pain lucky?" Kara asked incredulously, the worried sister in her coming out.
"I didn't break anything and when it finally heals it will be like nothing ever happened," Alex explained grasping Kara's hand comfortingly.
"I'm glad you told us," Maggie spoke up from beside them. When Alex looked in her direction, she could see slight anger on her face, but there was also fear there.
"I haven't had a drink since then. I'm not even taking anything for pain," Alex assured.
Seemingly unable to hold back anymore, Kara leaned forward and drew Alex into a hug. It was bordering on too tight, but Alex welcomed it with a sigh. They shared a laugh when Kara reached over and pulled Maggie into the hug with them.
After another hour of talking, Alex and Maggie had left together to head back to Maggie's apartment. The ride had been quiet with both of them lost in their own thoughts. When they got home, Alex had said she was tired and when straight to bed. Maggie sat on the couch thinking until she had finally drifted off to sleep.
What felt like only minutes later she jerked awake to the sound of shouts coming from the bedroom. She jumped up and rushed into the room to see Alex on the bed uncovered, fighting against some unseen force holding her down. She was on her back arms and legs spread, as she shouted at her attacker.
Not wanting to frighten Alex, Maggie called her name. When she got no response, she called louder until finally Alex went completely still and seconds later she jerked away with a scream, "Its OK," Maggie sat on the edge of the bed but didn't touch Alex. "It was just a dream. You're safe."
Alex was tense as she looked around the room frantically, but calmed down when she realized there was no threat, "Maggie?" she whispered.
Maggie laid a hand on her arm, "I'm right here. You're OK."
Alex nodded and wiped at the sweat that was pouring down her face. It was only then that Maggie realized that Alex was completely drenched. When Alex seemed, a little clearer Maggie suggested, "Why don't you go get cleaned up in the bathroom? It will make you feel better."
Alex nodded, and wordlessly grabbed some clean clothes and padded into the bathroom.
Maggie pulled the wet sheets off the bed and hurriedly replaced them with clean ones and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. She was sitting on the side of the bed when Alex walked out of the bedroom freshly showered and looking exhausted, but not confused anymore.
"You should drink this," Maggie suggested passing the bottle to Alex.
"Thanks," Alex drank most of the bottle in one go. She sat on the bed, her back against the headboard, "I haven't had one of those in a while," she explained. "I was having them every night in the beginning. I can't ever remember what they're about. I just remember the fear," she shivered, reaching down to pull the blanket over her.
Feeling helpless, Maggie looked to Oaf who was on the floor looking at the two of them curiously, "How about me and Oaf here lay down with you for a bit? He looks like a pretty good cuddle buddy, and I know for sure I am," she said trying to lighten the mood. Her heart sored when she got a small smile from Alex.
"He is actually used to sleeping with me, but I didn't want him on your bed. I know you're not much of a pet person," Alex said smiling fondly at the big dog.
Maggie patted the bed and called him up onto the bed and laughed as he responded immediately and flopped down right in Alex's lap. Alex wrapped her arms around him kissing his head.
Maggie scooted back on the bed until her back was against the headboard, much like Alex and pet Oafs back, "You got the better end I think," she commented as she was getting whipped with Oafs vigorously wagging tail.
"At least he isn't farting yet," Alex said with a laugh.
The thought was extremely unappealing, but Maggie would put up with anything to be able to spend this time with Alex. They lapsed into a comfortable silence, simply bestowing Oaf with attention that he ate up with a sated expression on a dog could pull off.
"I'm sorry I woke you," Alex said sometime later.
"It's no problem," Maggie said smiling, "I'm kind of enjoying myself now."
Alex chuckled and held out her hand, "Can you move closer?"
Maggie did as requested, having to adjust Oaf a little, but trying not to take away the obvious comfort he was offering Alex. They simply sat in silence holding hands, snickering occasionally as the farts Alex had warned of before made themselves known.
Oaf eventually wandered down toward the end of the bed and Alex scooted even closer to Maggie, "Can I kiss you?"
The question sent a delighted shiver through Maggie's body, she could only manage a nod as Alex leaned closer and kissed her. Maggie lost track of time as they made out like a couple of teenagers, kissing and laughing, until Alex finally fell asleep. She was laying facing Maggie and her face was peaceful, so much different than how the night had started. Maggie wasn't really one to for sappy romantic notions, but she knew she had never been more content than simply laying there staring at Alex, with a snoring, farting dog asleep on her legs.